Tell us why we should hire you

Tell us why we should hire you.

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No confidence huh? Not surprising.

I remember finding their website as a kid and wanting to apply when I got older.

I like games

now is your chance you have nothing to lose

I have drawn fetish artworks of Nintendo characters in the past

>they don't even have an art director
2025

It would be interesting to see a modern Nintendo game with a semi-realistic art style, like the original Metroid Prime. Everything they do is cartoony nowadays

I have a feeling they'll be forced to use the blow up doll version of Samus from Smash, as well, which would clash with anything realistic...

My peenus is good size

look nigger, i've got no experience whatsoever and i lack any passion, i just want to work at video games; if people with these characteristics got a job at gamefreak, i sure can do it too.

what if I have experience wit making games with bad mansters and gurls in it

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I've also recently had a miscarriage

*Needs 20 years of AAAA game dev experiece.
*Has shipped 69 AAAA games
*Is willing to work in a challenging but rewarding environment!

Uhh, copy-paste MP1's art direction.

I can make your game diverse. As of right now it's obvious that the current direction of your studio is big yikes.

I've imported some models of Link into Unity with some maps from Ocarina of Time and cranked the bloom up

2025, I expect Metroid 5 and 6 to already be out by then, we may even get Metroid 7 by then.

>*$13/h
>PhD required

WHERE IS THEIR MYSTERY PROJECT


AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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kek

You shouldn't, I am in no way qualified for this position, I am just here because the government says I have to look for work to claim unemployment benifits

we're gonna take a gamble. Youre in.

OK fuck uhm
Make it look like that old movie Akira.

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We can do cel-shading. A fresh look might be what we need to bring in a new audience. Reggie says he likes it because it will be cheap.

HIRED

Im thinking we wow our audience by bringing back the castle crashers look.

>Reggie
who?

Actually that could be cool

i want us to go the 343 route. update our designs like the halo 5 armor. i want our space pirates to also look like the decepticons from the transformers films.

kill yourself

I am a lesbian tranny.
Yes i have a beard. Cant a women have a beard?

trying to be like halo is what caused prime 3 to be the worst in the trilogy, so we should especially not follow 343's example

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>Their unnamed project still hasnt come out or been announced
>Even though it was on Reggie's goodbye picture

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Prime 3 try to be like Halo and Halo ended up being a far better game. Prime should have stuck with what it was good at with the first Prime game.

yes, no haloshit

probably cancelled

I thought everyone agreed prime 2 was the least best.

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you thought wrong, prime 2 is the patrician choice. 3 has always been considered the weakest

>Retro went from putting out two of the best platformers of the past decade to cancelling their project and sitting in development hell because of Metroidfags whining about their dead franchise
In another universe, Retro has put out their third DKC game and it's the best platformer ever, but we're stuck in the universe where they're dead.

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returns is far from one of the best platformers of the past decade

?
Echoes is the strongest by a healthy margin

the opening with the zombie troopers l, and the clues of wht happened in every room, and their journals is kino you fucking piece of shit

xenoblade chronicles x was kinda like that

I'm starting to think it was just a private joke

Missed the opportunity when the last president would approve of that.

>EX-Rare are making a new 2D platformer with their new mascots that plays eerily similar to the DKCR games

What a curious timeline.