E3 Report Card update thread. Post-Ubisoft edition

>Kinda funny
I've watched every conference and I'm skipping this one. I'll talk any Ubisoft host over Greg any fucking day

>Lego Forza
>Bad

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TES6 was mentioned, along with Starfield, just that "they're being worked on"

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The new watchdogs game looked a little bit interesting until you realize it's another EBIN DIVERSITY game.
That was literally the only game.
The rest is promoting non-vidya shit, niggers, furries dancing for the one millionth time, and then some more niggers.

Is the Division 2 any good? I've never really looked into the series before, but I liked how the environments looked.

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Anyone got a blank report card?

Man, that went by quick.
Honestly, I think most of the presentations have at least been entertaining

>That Ubisoft Conference
OH NO NO NO
AHAHAHEEEHEEEHAHAHAHAHOHOHOHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAHAHHAHAHAOHOHOHOHOHHOHOAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHEHEHEHEHEHEHEEAHAHAHAHAHAH

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I didn't even realize it was over. Nothing really happened.

>DEPORTATION SQUADS

e3.vidya.fm/cards/

Still laughing at the ubisoft tranny

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I bought it day 1 and Ubisoft just keeps making it worse and worse. Plus theyre going back on things they said prior the game coming out. Also next to nobody is playing the raid (no matchmaking)and ubisoft more or less said who cares.

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>epic games trying this hard
>people still hate them
Cant help but feel bad because when they inevitably fall, they're going to fall really hard and everyone is just going to laugh at them. Enjoy the press while you can Tim, I guess.

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>gets most of the things he hoped for
>c+
what did he mean by this

Microsoft a C-
Everything else an F

This is not a good year for gaming

>all these fags forgetting a new MS Flight Sim after like a decade.

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So wither Squeenix pulls off a miracle or this E3 was a massive disappointment.
Nothing can stop Sony...

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>didnt watch devolver
fucking pussy

When did Sony reveal The Last of Us 2? Still no release date?

My god the ubisoft conference was boring. Only good thing was the stealth /an/ threads that came out of the pitbull being taken on stage

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I wanted Gears 5, but it didn't look very good and we only got a cinematic teaser for Halo Infinite.

But there was Ori at MS show

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Only Squeenix and Nintendo will save this shitshow. So far its just boring as fuck

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No one reads these cards so I'll just make it quick

MS 6.5/10
Bethesda 2/10
PCGaming 3/10
Ubisoft 4/10

Didn't watch Devolver.

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Xbox: C. Passing grade but nothing more.
Bethesda: F. Had one or two good moments but they outweighed this overwhelmingly with masturbatory bullshit.
Devolver: D. They tried but had nothing to actually show.
PC: D. Simply nothing of value.
Ubisoft: F. Absolute trash.

Not expecting anything from Square Enix and slightly hopeful for Nintendo (Bayo 3 and XBX2).

Death Stranding wins.

>Square Enix
>Nioh

thanks doc

What? There was? I don't remember seeing it.

>didn't watch Devolver

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It was at 5am for me man.

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>Didn't watch Devolver.
Didn't miss anything

Oh yeah, I am retarded, i meant new Nier.

I appreciate your effort.

Yeah, they showed some combat, escape sequences and some extra environments.

I can't fucking believe they would bait me this fucking hard with Fisher

Im so fucking mad right now

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Watch Dogs was shit. It's yet another 'overthrow the establishment' game. Fucking boring as shit. How about infiltrating dedsec and destroying it from within?

Oh, I should have figured. I think a new Nier is possible. Sorry for being a dick, bro.

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Report cards are reddit.
Who do you show these to? Your mum, each other? The devs? Lmao, I'm going to be lifting weights all day.

Biggest fuckup so far is Microsoft still keeping the new xbox under wraps, the one piece of information we got that we didnt already know was that they specified both
>SSD and solid state disk
>VRAM oddly announced as a positive feature
It's all pointing to that they are going to have two tiers of performance and use a smaller SSD and VRAM to increase performance of the low cost unit, problem is that it's going to fuck with the minimum specs of new games, it might be a new xbox 360 E situation

Squeenix is going to show PS4 exclusive shit anyway.

Gaming is literally dead

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report cards have been a Yea Forums tradition since before you started high school.

god i asked for two fucking things from ubisoft, one of them is something they'd done TWO YEARS RUNNING

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I can totally see Nintendo winning with a C+ by the end of this E3. Neither surprising nor special though.

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Most of their stuff makes way to PC eventually anyway.

Sony literally won by not even showing up

They sponsored the last 2 PCgaming shows.

What font user?

And it's the most beta tradition ever.
>MUH CULTURE

Unless you are a Nintendo fan I don't see how could they beat Microsoft.
New pokemon is almost confirmed kusoge, Smash is autism central, Metroid development had to to be started from scratch recently...

>You will never play a Valiant Hearts 2

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Voya Nui font from Bionicle. You can find it on biomediaproject

just fuck my e3 up dog

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>New console looks ok

It's a literally a mid-budget PC

>HARDWARE ACCELERATED RAY TRACING
>SSD!!!!!
>AMD PROCESSOR
>WORDS
>WOW

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dont forget
>VRAM

>shilling a netflix series during a videogame conference

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>sony winning just by having a youtube channel
they fucking knew

not looking too hot

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Devolver's bootleg was neat
PC had the best conference
The rest were absolute fucking garbage

Nintendo should be the default winner at this point. It's impossible to fuck up that hard

I kinda am, though I'm more interested in Astral Chain and SMT5.

MS had some interesting stuff conceptually like Blair Witch, but I can get hyped without gameplay footage or for shooters. At least MS realized that viewers wanna see more than a couple of games unlike Ubisoft.

>nintendo hype
use deodorant

>not see me before class

>Unless you are a Nintendo fan I don't see how could they beat Microsoft
there wasn't a single surprise at Microsoft's conference, the biggest things were a digitized keanu and a 7 year old game coming to the west. All nintendo needs is a big new announcement which is imminent with retro's new game being teased/monolith soft's new IP

>PC had the best conference
PC was dogshit. Xbox was unironically a better "PC" conference than PC gamer/Epics conference.

Microsoft: Showed a lot of games, but barely any gameplay. C+
Bethesda: Fucking trash the entire time. No gameplay at all besides Doom, mobile garbage, incredibly self-fellating, overall terrible. The Tokyo game looked cool, but that's it. F
Devolver Digital: Very redpilled about the state of modern gaming, but barely showed any games. C-

Haven't seen any others.

>Square Enix: Bayonetta 3 on PC
Nigga are you retarded?

time it set everyone at ubisoft on fire

Blair Witch was definitely a surprise.

Yes I'm here every year.

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based
#resistDrumpf

>there wasn't a single surprise at Microsoft's conference
bitch there hasnt been a single surprise at Nintendo's for the past 15-20 years now

>metroid prime 4/samus returns

I should have stayed in bed this year.

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I like your art user.

Love your art every year man

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i'm glad that the woman is just a flavor of the week fad and people are actually interested in Ghostwire Tokyo. I think it will be a great game.

Don't you people have jobs? How have most of you already watched all these shows?

>not watching them during work

I like your doodles user

based Ace Attorney chad

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>dont you guys have jobs

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someone post a template if it hasnt been posted already i forgot to make one

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Updated. Only Square left for today.

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This year is horrible so far.

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this is the worst kind of E3
its not even cringe, its just fucking boring

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...

It was like toward the beginning retard

>that reality in PC Gaming

Heh, nice.

thanks

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>Darksiders 4
>Destroy All Humans 3
>Battle For Bikini Bottom remake
>Desperados III
>all of these titles anounced with fucking gameplay
lets be fucking honest
THQnordiq simply won E3 this year

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Wait? Where’s Sony?

Not at this year's E3

Skipped this year cuz they have nothing to show.

Ah I missed the very beginning of the conference, of course they would have shown it there

only thing worth a damn this year was doom and the pre pre show ultimate MK3 show kino

prove me wrong

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Darksiders game isn't 4, just a spin off. Also they only showed screenshots which really sucks.

Ori and the Will of the Wisps

I feel like I was on the money with my expectations outside of overhyping MS a bit. Limited Run was a nice surprise.

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Where's Devolver?

>rating microsoft and PC equally
lol

I wish video games were still fun

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They are.
You're just a bitter adult now.

Couldn't find a tempelate with Devolver, but I'd give the conference a solid B- only because I wish they had more games to show.

Don't mind me, just a Nintendo zoomer coming through

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>All these "b-buh where is Cuphead?" graphs
Let's be honest. You guys would buy, even if it came out 3 years later. Unlike the waves of FPSs that infested E3, Cuphead has no competition in the indie-platformer department and all the delaying does is build up demand.

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>Ninja Gaiden for PC
>Red Dead and Persona PC ports
>New Splinter Cell game
You're the one who's set up disappointment for yourself, user.

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Politics aside, the concept is pretty good.

I like how you guys aren't even adding EA to the Report Card anymore.

Lightning Fast:

EA: 2/10
Microsoft: 6/10
PC Gaming Show: 2/10
Ubisoft: 0/10
Bootleg Sony Show: Subscribe to Pewdiepie

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>buy our pass, goyim
say what you will but I pay like 4 bucks a month for Game Pass so it's a decent enough deal if you buy a shitload of trials from CD key sites.

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There's no way in hell they're going to make all those "unique NPCS" they say they're going to make, user.
Remember the original Watch Dogs E3 presentation and it's final product?

I mean, whatever is shown in the MS presentation is technically also a PC presentation as well.

I'm fucking mad.

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Devolver Direct: 7/10

The Xbox worth picking up? Or should I wait for the inevitable Switch ports?

>You guys would buy, even if it came out 3 years later.
Yes, because I genuinely like Cuphead and would rather play it sooner than later. I'm all for hype but I can only stomach so many delays.

Jeez, I said the "concept". I had the song "sweet little lies" the whole way through in my head.

Getting to play as a grandma on an FPS is pretty fucking rad, though, I hope more games do it.

>Owns a shitload of developers
>Shit out only 2 new games
not even worth mentioning, also fifa sucks get at me eurofags

what? just get a computer

Look at all you autists dedicating time to that bullshit.

E3 is shit, and has been since 2010.

>PC gaming

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I do have a computer. Will everything eventually come to the PC?

if you're referring to xbone shit, then yes, literally everything on xbone is on pc

But it's fun and that's why most people browse here.

Flight Simulator back after 13 years with real time in engine footage

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>fun
Next world war when

Cuphead was supposed to release in 2014, but got delayed into 2017.
They know they can get away with this because they literally did before with no backlash.

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Microsoft: 7/10. Lots of games, but nothing too interesting to me outside Flight Simulator and that deer game looked cute I guess. Scarlett reveal was underwhelming.

Bethesda: 4/10. Only good thing shown was Doom Eternal. Adding dialog and NPCs shouldn't be marketing feature in a Fallout game. It's fucking pathetic.

Devolver: 6/10. Was fine, but not enough games. At least it was short and reminded me that there was a Pre Pre Show back this year right after which was great again.

PC Gaming Show: 4/10. Bunch of indies and shit already seen. Epic exclusives. Feel really bad for Shenmue fans.

Ubisoft: 3/10. Watch Dogs Legion looks alright, granny with a gun carried hard, though. Absolutely fucking nothing else was interesting.

Don't have much hype for SE and I don't plan to get a Switch for awhile, so Nintendo does little for me.

At least the Pre Pre Show was fun.

>Minecraft Dungeons looks cool
>Ubisoft didn't have jack shit that was interesting

Where is your head at

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you are being too generous with those ratings

ubi and bethesda was an absolute trashfire

? I didn't post ratings

meant to reply to

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There were more than a few reportcards showing some interest in Doom and Ghostwire from Bethesda, and even a little interest in Watch Dogs from Ubisoft.
Though other than those you're pretty much right.

>those grades

wow, wonder if this nintencl is going to give nintendo an A+

How long is the Squeenix conference supposed to be?

>+French Canada
throw in French Belgium as well

>Wolfenstein movie
Jesus fucking christ, there's more gameplay in a wolfenstein game than fucking nintendo games, can you stop calling every fucking game you don't like a movie?

>cringe, cringe, goyim le cringe cringe
this is probably the worst report card I've seen in a long time

>Fall Guys being a (-)

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too lazy to fill one out
xbox b
bethesda d
ikumi nakamura a++
devolver b+
pc gayman b
ubisoft c-

lego forza was the only other thing apart from halo that got me excited out of ms conference. i hope you guys don't think that forza isn't a good game.

At least one thing caught my eye for each conference, which gives it at least a 3 or 4 to me.

It got so convoluted with images that I had to resize it to fit under 4mb

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I'm not expecting much from Square either. I hope Nintendo has some surprise up its sleeve. I'm really happy that we will see some Luigi's Mansion, but fi there is no new announcement worth looking into, this E3 will be a complete waste of time.

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It's a ~, I'm middling on it since it was just an animated trailer. Is it just a Battle Royale based on a variety gameshow?

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Bingo update

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You guys are pessimistic cunts. The only thing that will please you its the greatest game of all time made by only straight white males containing only straight white humans

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Is that really too much to ask?

>
I always told my loving father that when I grew up I would never take such low tier b8 like this

I don't like being cynical but these conferences have been on the weaker side. Ubisoft was downright garbage.

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That image and to a point the sentiment behind it is trying way too hard to be smart and above others, why do so many people post it?

>these are the people who shit the board up with a billion smash threads a day

I like how you started out writing "straight white males" but then realized that was retarded and changed it to "straight white humans"

>Pic related
Imagine living life where you can't genuinely enjoy something, but you can't because some internet nerds think you are a weak beta male because you're supposed to expect something better for their sake.

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Because it's a rlm quote about Disney's transparent money grubbing bullshit, and the fag in that picture embodies that sentiment.

They've been around longer than a week, user.

So are you just not supposed to have emotion? Not supposed to express excitement, because it's
something made for money? I don't give a shit about Star Wars or any big properties in particular but if some guy wants to cream his pussy over it then let him, shit.

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It's more about people going apeshit over transparent money grubbing garbage that doesn't even try to break the mold or do anything interesting. Look at the people still desperately trying to argue that The Last Jedi was a good movie when it's fails on so many levels. The problem isn't that corporations are making products with the intent to make money. The problem is that they aren't trying to do anything else.

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lego forza is based. makes the "i can't stand car sounds" autists rage and it's based off lego racers which was kino

Why does it have to be unique or interesting for people to be excited over it? Some people like basic stuff. There's nothing wrong with liking something that you just think is good. I fucking hated Last Jedi but I know people that loved it, it's no skin off my bones to let others enjoy something I didn't. I'm not above them or enlightened because I thought The Last Jedi was boring. There is good, unique stuff coming out, it's not extremely popular no, but it's out there. Let people be excited over things, fuck I wish I was able to be that enthusiastic about something. You're not above others because you want something unique, you just have different tastes.

Your tastes are max shit

>see me after class
o-okay... if you insist

>It's more about people going apeshit over transparent money grubbing garbage that doesn't even try to break the mold or do anything interesting.
Not everything in life has to "break the mold", it just could give a continuation of said enjoyment.
People only improve if they can't find peace in the current. I watched that video and the dude seems and the guy's happiness seemed genuine, not the "accepting mediocrity/comprimising/giving in" happiness. Sure it's mediocre garbage, but not everyone feels it that way.

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>Everyone sleeping on PC Gaming Show in these Report Cards
The fuck? Yea Forums never shuts the fuck up about "le based PC master race".
Did something happen to make PC less based?

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The problem is that people's acceptance of low level, uninteresting, predictable garbage allows corporations to take advantage of that, lowering the bar further and further. The problem comes from shit like Disney pushing out the most basic, formulaic garbage every year where you can tell the entire plot from the trailer, or you just already know what's going to happen from the get go. We've had over a decade of cocky action heroes who don't take anything seriously and crack jokes in the face of the villain, and now it's uncommon for an action movie to have character that take things seriously. It's more common to get a measured jokes per second in a first draft of a script hastily put together with lackluster CG and give it to a board to make cuts on what combination of elements would bring in the most profit.

It's uninteresting and tiring.

Enjoying a platform doesn't mean defending its every move.

PCGaming Show has been mediocre since it started on 2015
The only exciting thing i have seen it was yakuza pc ports

You shouldn't record said reaction and post it online. That's just disingenuous.

PC gaming show is always shit.

I mostly play on PC and xbox had a better PC lineup than the fucking PC show.

it would be much easy to be clamoring PC MASTER RACE if they had something to show other than pre-rendered teasers like consoles do but worse

Liking PC means you like blatant shilling for Epic Game Store™

because its been a shit show for years, also Yea Forums are mostly piratefags anyways so they dont care about PC news anyways as long as they get their illegally free games

I have no doubt that he's genuinely excited to see JJ try his best to piece together the trash fire that was TLJ. I have no doubt that he sees no problem with TLJ and will eat up whatever happens in the next movie. I don't think one person being excited over trash means we shouldn't ask for an improvement on trash. Someone will always enjoy everything, but that doesn't mean we can't do better.

> Mordhau clone

Calm down... it's just bait

I have one question for you
DO YOU NOT HAVE A PHONE?!

E3 hasn't been good for years and that's why Sony has dropped out of it.
In fact Sony is the real winner for not attending.
Most of the games are going to be ported to PS4 anyways.
Sony has so many games releasing this year that they can't bother announcing new ones.
Squeenix is mostly a Sony conference truthfully.

The 2016 one was decent.

Then don't watch it. There's literally nothing else to tell you, if people liking something you find uninteresting bothers you that much just watch what you do find interesting and ignore the things you don't. Someone being excited over TLJ or the newest Transformers flick is always going to be here and regardless of your opinions it doesn't matter, because you can't change people's tastes. You're not some patron saint of high quality cinema meant to herd others.

Worst E3 of all time
F

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You don't like the way this corporation makes movies? Don't watch it.
You don't like how this director handled the sequel to your favorite series? Don't watch it.
You don't like how every movie is being coaxed into following the same formula? Don't watch it.

You can't just ignore the problems; they're still there, and as long as nobody even tries to ask for them to do better, they won't. The problem isn't that some people are okay with things I do not like. The problem is that the things that I like do not get made anymore, and there's no incentive for it to get made anymore.

play the switch, it's got fun games

All nicely updated

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>The problem is that the things that I like do not get made anymore
Sounds more like the problem is you're angry what you like isn't popular and you refuse to search past the surface level to find it.
Movies, music, and even games I like aren't popular, shit they're rarely made anymore and are even rarer to be made competently, but I search for them and find them, because I'm not lazy.
Things are always going to be pumped out for mass appeal, that's how Hollywood has always worked.

Eh, maybe I'll try it when the emulator's stable enough

I don't have any problem finding things that I like. I've been explaining to you that the sentiment behind that quote is that there isn't any effort being put into these products, and nobody is desiring more. That leads to the overall quality of things lowering, and as long as people stay content with sub par garbage, it'll keep getting worse.

Oh shit! Nintendo's presentation will last 40mins because of how much time they'll dedicate to Fire Emblem.

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Nintendo's show is an hour this time, IIRC their longest Direct yet. Also Animal Crossing will get the longest timeslot, I guarantee it.

it was shit

Not user, but corporations literally run America more effectively than any other form of leadership that exists in America. Corporation revolt is meaningless since all they need is some celebrity endorsing them and they immediately make up their loss profit in a matter of a week. I'm not saying it's a good or bad thing, but we really have no choice since corporations and the elite know how to perfectly manipulate capitalism. Something that everyone knows is irredeemably shit, they can just convince an army of dudebros, 80 IQ and under black people, and bored women that it isn't.

Why do you think millions buy the exact same FPS and Sports game every year?

>Tfw Fire Emblem is my favorite SRPG
>The plot-twist in the leaks claim it potentially has the potential of going from a 6/10 game to a 9/10 game
I see no issue with this. But go ahead and seething over Fire Emblem, Smashfag.

So you just accept mediocrity then? I'd rather call people faggots than accept garbage down my throat.

I don't care about FE. Spoil the leak for me if it's that good.

>Ubisoft spend 5 minutes shilling an Apple TV show
new low for E3, I was dying

I didn't say accept anything. I'm saying you literally have no choice but to watch it be successful. And i'm not saying, "Haha, eat this shit or you suck.". I'm not attacking you. I'm just imply saying mediocrity is the epitome of America entertainment because we allowed corporations to intertwine with American society with an unbiased opinion.

The best possible thing you could do is support something that actually deserves support.

Too lazy to look up the leaks since you can just google them as fast as I could, but I can tell you real quick.
Appearantly the entire mediocre school plot is just a huge fake-out. The actual plot happens after a 20 year timeskip and the bullshit we've been shown so far is only build up for an actual good plot.

droppin off my report card. hope mom and dad are proud

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honestly how I would sum up E3, not bad.

Stay mad bethesda cuck

>all these redditors who were hyped for bethesda
holy shit

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>Wanting Animal Crossing
>Not wanting weebshit
I swear Nintendo's fanbase is pathetic.
It's either you're a degenerate so far gone weeb or a meme obsessed manchild unironically playing games 100% intended for children.
And these 2 fanbases war with each other because ???.

>playing games 100% intended for children
well my favorite game of all time is brood war. you're assuming a bit much based on my hype for a single game.

But Bethesda did apologize, retard