What is he planning?
What is he planning?
Global domination, but he has to deal with China first.
Censoring more games
first step was cleaning up the Artifact page on Twitch. second step is dethroning Auto Chess with by making their own "official" version. it's going to be lit
I hope their version of auto chess flops harder than artitrash. Considering it's valve we're talking about, it probably will
He does not need to plan anything anymore, in fact he does nothing at all.
His next meal
Not a goddamn thing. Probably just sitting on his money throne.
so is valve gonna do what blizz tried to do with Dota?
gordon freeman is going to be the next hero revealed at ti9
>its been 8 years since valve made a videogame
Half Life VR game reveal most likely
How to continue to make insane amounts of money by luring you in with sound game mechanics, selling you based on the pedigree of the company, and then shoving so many cosmetics into the game that you buy one. Then he has you between his burger buns and applies the pressure. On his right monitor is a graph of exactly how many minutes played on average per cosmetic purchase. He looks at that graph every hour once he finishes his fourth diet coke, and ruminates.
killing the Epic Chinks then releasing Half Life 3 while dabbing on all you niggas.
Nothing, he is too fucking lazy to get anything done, fucker can't even control his own staff
Being a hub where creatives can experiment with new shit without worrying about risk thanks to Steam.
>sit on your mountain of money while the competition continues to piss people off by being too agressive
>???
>profit
Sleep while the ebin game store keeps getting away with everything they want
He's the only one enlightened enough to see the future
Valve operates in the Chinese market as well fyi
Would he be at the Microsoft conference or the PC gaming show?
Nothing, your god has fallen. Give it a rest.
ironic because Steam is actually operates in china big time along with Dota2 and CS while EGS (the competition you probably refer to) isn't
I think he'll be at Microsoft
To continue doing absolutely nothing.
EGS is in china too
operating*
also all the "world's biggest esport prizes" go there with dota2
no it isn't
the whole meme is coming from Epic Games studio having a chinese minority share owner, but EGS doesn't even operate in china, and considering that it hardly makes any money but just exists to state Sweeney's 12% cut autism I doubt their investment touches EGS at all
IMAGINE BEING SO FAT
Soon my friend, soon.
9/11 2
We need to take control and stop the gaben.
But how?
Rikochet 2
He was planning for VR to take off and use projects to push it. Didn’t happen so now they’re just sitting in idle trying to figure out what to actually do. It’s not a coincidence that the steam machines, their VR, and Source 2 all seemed to come together in the same general timeframe, they just overestimated the appeal and accessibility of VR.
Portal 2 episode 1
Electric Boogaloo?
oh, I guess that stealth launch was too stealthy
still, it's been 3 weeks, Valve operates in China since years and does huge tournaments there for their games
it's pretty manipulative to use racism card in favor of Valve when they are cooperating with china since a much longer time and likely have way more money exchanged with them back and forth
His luxurious retirement
Counter-Strike VR and Left 4 Dead VR
i wish
winning
He's going to make SAO helmets and 2 years worth of semen a reality.
does anyone know/care/believe about this guy actually being a huge dick?
I know gaben is seen as this lovable, huggable fat bro, but messages from multiple ex-valve employees exposed him as some very manipulative faggot who literally brags about leading people on a leash.
every other person's image in the industry would have been shattered by shit like this but in case of Gaben this kind of crap is just swept under the rug
Nigger, steam machines were 4 years ago and if those co-coincided with anything it was their work on linux support.
dinner
it's steak btw
The fuck is Auto Chess?
but they made Artifact just recently
valve doesn't have enough workers to develop anything beyond small VR projects. The whole company is like 200 people. Gaben is too much of a jew to pay for developers to make games when Valve can already just take 1/3 of the PC gaming industry's revenue for the job of giving out download links
just look at the name. It's obviously some kind of chink game
Being a huge dick? More like having a huge dick. Check this fucker out!!!
his next meal beacause he's fat lol
>doesn't have enough workers
How many did they have when they made half life?
based gabe
>every other person's image in the industry would have been shattered by shit like this but in case of Gaben this kind of crap is just swept under the rug
Yeah, that's what a cult of personality will do for you. He's going to be another Steve Jobs, praised as a nice guy genius while he's around but once he's gone the general consensus will be he was an asshole that lucked out in a big way.
hi gabe
>How many did they have when they made half life?
It was around 40 or 50. That was about standard for a AAA title at the time. Half Life was not a game made by a small passionate team. These days your standard AAA game has a team size of several hundred.
Here is your leak bro.
A good polished game doesn't always need hundreds of people. Especially if you spend almost a decade on it.
probably not many, but a 20 years old game didn't require as much workers as an AAA or even just an AA game of today would require.
Valve also just gave the boot to like 20 workers recently. The company doesn't even intends to grow.
>A good polished game doesn't always need hundreds of people.
If you want to make a AAA game today that's what it costs. There's no getting around how expensive and time consuming high production values is.
>Especially if you spend almost a decade on it.
Since when has that ever worked out?
no one even wants a fucking Half-Life 3 anymore. the game and story is shit.
Gaben no!
>Half Life 3 VR
>Valve also just gave the boot to like 20 workers recently.
In completely unrelated news, Gabe's snack budget has doubled.
Could be real.
It's called Half-Life 3D user
what the fuck is in those bags? cut up broccoli?
On a real, I would fucking kill for a new Left 4 Dead. More so than Half-Life 3.
>"Gabe, we need rolling papers."
>"No worries, I've got 'em right here."
>pulls out Half Life 3 design doc
To eat a buffet again
Does this imply they're putting Half-Life 1 into the new engine? Seems weird considering Black Mesa would likely be far superior.
I chuckled. Thanks user.
Does Gabe Newell look like he's ever been in the same room as broccoli? You know damn well what that is.
His lunch break to KFC.
You may not like it, but this is how peak billionaire looks like
>Was getting diabetes part of your plan?
>Of course.
>Well congratulations, you got yourself fat. Now what's the next step of your master plan?
>Eating this buffet, with no leftovers!
chicken wings
spicy chicken wings
Yeah, Gabe really cares about his health.
He's done with bugers
he's hungry for your brains
You'll see what games are on a Steam sale while you sleep
meanwhile Epic actually, literally develops the world leading game engine, Unreal Engine 4
youtube.com
actually has a new Unreal Tournament game in development
develops the world's most popular video game
tries to create a future where greedy download link sharing middle men don't tax 1/3 of the gaming industry just because they can, leeching away tons of money from game development
but because "muh ebin gaben memes xd" cult faggotry the whole retarded pc gayming community thinks that this shitty leach company thats only accomplishment in the last 8 years is shitting out a blatant cashgrab like Artifact are the actual good guys
even though even old valve employees support epic and call out valve for their bullshit, this retarded community just shrugs it off as "salty people who were probably kicked out". It's like no fucking amount of proofs and facts are enough for you retards to stop fellating this shitty company and realize who actually cares about game development and the industry.
>This thread
>actually has a new Unreal Tournament game in development
Yeah, about that...
>all these fat jokes
he's not extraordinarily fat
Okay, Gabe.
You're right. He's extremely fat.
>he's not extraordinarily fat
For you.
That 1 million Artifact tournament they promised
if it was cancelled they would have already announced it, like they did with paragon
there is easily a 50% chance that we will see something about it in this years E3 pc conference, since Epic will be present. Unlike there is for HL3, where the fucking writer of the game gave out the script for Ep3 because the company itself doesn't hold any chance for them ever making a new HL.
>if it was cancelled they would have already announced it
They've already confirmed that they're not working for it and haven't touched it for like 2 years.
t.american
brapvision
ssshhh
there is a difference between the development being halted and the game being cancelled
as I said, there is every chance that we will see it in this E3. I doubt epic would go to the pc conference and try to promote egs without showing anything new that would make the people turn their heads.
fixed
>there is every chance that we will see it in this E3
M8, Unreal is a dead meme at this point and Epic sees it as nothing but an internal pastime for when they have nothing else to do. They haven't given a fuck about the franchise since they found a better cash cow in Gears of Brown and they're certainly not going to give it a serious comeback now.
Lunch
Nigga. Epic devs are literally in endless crunch because they need to keep shitting out updates for Fortnite. They can't even be bothered to add a fucking shopping cart to the EGS what makes you think they're going to bring back UT?
Why don't they just hire more devs
More dead VR gimmicks and no games
>just take 1/3 of the PC gaming industry's revenue for the job of giving out download links
Hot take Chang
It's not possible to make a good game with 500+ people.
Why do that when you can just force your current workers to do more overtime?
HALF-LIFE 2 REMASTERED
Dota 3
No but real talk didn't Valve like dedicate a majority of their employees focusing on the Index with only small pocket teams like the handful of CSGO devs or Icefrog and his merry band of fuckwits.
So now that they have so much free hands, with the Index released and especially since Artifact flopped hard so there's definitely no one there who wants to work on that shitshow, this is pretty much the best time to actually speculate about what that lazy fat fuck Gaben wants to do.
>inb4 a Portal 3, Half-Life 3, and Left for Dead 3 announcement to showcase the Source 2 engine. 2023
>three flagship VR titles with one most definitely being related to half life
>their own version of autochess
>that campo santo game since they are technically part of valve now
there anything else I'm missing?
>Half Life 2 remaster that includes episodes 1-3 and beta content never
death
>tfw /ourguy/ Tim was rallying hard against Steam but all valve did was jerk off to vr porn
>ex-employee has beef
I'm sure they're completely unbiased
I seriously fucking hope you're not talking about god damn Richard Geldreich.
To literally transplant human minds into video games.
How does it feel that retro gamers hate half life, valve drones?
A flagship VR game is confirmed for this year.
What are the chances that they announce it at E3? Because I'm 100% sure the auto chess trailer is going to be during TI.
what if I am?
Is say less than 50%, because dosen't Gabe think E3 is a waste of time?
Transcend his mortal human body and transfer his consciousness into a virtual eternal machine.
fuck off, cave
Really convenient that these former valve employees always seem to be on radio silence for years, then conveniently crawl out of the woodwork to shittalk Steam during times when Epic's making huge blunders and would greatly benefit heat being taken off them for a while.
How does it feel to not crosspost correctly? LOL
prove him wrong valvetard
>you know...that's a great idea actually
Ummm did you drones forget that he's the one that shed the horrid truth on Valve a year or two ago?
I don't care.
Only in the dream timeline user
Maybe someday
hl will never be a classic or retro fps.
VALVE ABSOLUTELY BTFO
This is now laugh at the Gayben thread
As if I care about what those losers think
His lunch and dinner, probably some snacks too
zoomer
Okay.