OREGON TRAIL PART 3

>the dalles
are we paying homage to terry davis as well?

FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD

Aye, sir

Based and Fordpilled

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You aren't Chad's, only fags like caulk.
FORDCHADS LETS GOOOOO

IDS HABBENING LABS

It's the final stretch boys

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youtube.com/watch?v=Y1D3a5eDJIs

THE DALLES IS IN SIGHT

OUR FINAL OBSTACLE

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F

Nigga you gay. Badwater-Chan is giving you one last chance to ford.

TIME OUT

GO GO GO GALO SENGEN

YOU KNOW WHAT WE DOIN BOYS

WE'RE GONNA GET FUCKED

The ghost of Todd won't let you.

Keep going!

WE'VE MADE IT TO THE DALLES

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We can do this bros

'Aint hirin' no dag gum Injun.

FUCK INDIANS
RAFT THAT SHIT

4 VOTES DECIDES HOW WE REACH OREGON

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RAFT

UNLESS HE'S FROM THE FORD TRIBE HE CAN FUCK RIGHT OFF

You hear the blue safari, hire an injun!

hire that fucking redskin

toll road

RAFT

RAFT! FORD! IA BADWATER-CHAN!!!

LISTEN TO THIS WISE MAN

FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD

DOWN THE RIVER

Raft

RAFT THAT SHIT

RAFT NIGGAS

TOLL ROAD

ROAD

TOLL ROAD

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ONE FINAL FORD

RAFT

ROADS BUILT FOR FORDS VEHICLES

RAFT
SCREW THE JEW

RAFT

MOUNTAIN MAN
TAKE ME BY THE HAND
LEAD ME TO THE LAND

Pay the toll

WE DONT HAVE ANY MONEY

FORD IT
AAAAAAAAAAAA

River!

River is the only option

The ultimate ford. Badwater-chan will be pleased.

RAFT and HIRE INDIAN

...

WE CANT PAY THE TOLL
WE NEED TO BECOME ONE WITH THE RIVER

ignore ford fags, we're actually gonna die if we don't go on the road

RAFT YOU SON OF A BITCH

...

WHY IS EVERYONE SCREAMING

i don't burn no coal
i won't pay no toll

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

WHY AREN'T YOU SCREAMING

IM GONNA SAY THE N WORD!

Because we're all in a cramped as fuck wagon and we want to throw our opinions at the driver.

toll

road

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OH GOD I CANT LOOK

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HERE WE GO

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SCREAMINGS THE FORD WAY
FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRD

FOOOORD

SANIC SPEED BABY
NO TURNING BACK NOW

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OH GOD OH FUCK

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Oh shit we raftin. Official theme:
youtube.com/watch?v=1k8craCGpgs

it's fuckin' on

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DON'T FUCK UP!!

RIP,

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HORY SHIIIIITTT

THE FINAL BOSS

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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

VERY fast wagon floating at incerdibel hihg speed

>

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FASTER AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
youtube.com/watch?v=atuFSv2bLa8

This is it bros. It's been an honor caulking with you all.

Aaaaaaaaaaaah fuck! It's go time

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GOGOGO

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FOOOOOOOOOOORD

DONT FUCK THIS UP

BADWATER-CHAN HAS APPROVED YOU!

OH SHIT ITS HAPPENDING

OH MY FUCKING GOD YAAAASS

get fucked, fordfags

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We're alive!

FUCK YOU BADWATER-CHAN, WE'LL CONQUER THIS FUCKING RIVER!

THANK YOU FORD GODS

YEEEEEEEES

WE MADE IT!!!!

WE DID IT REDDIT

FUUUUCK YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAA CHECK EM NIIGGGER

WE DID IT

WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE

get fucked

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my god what the fuck is homer thinking about

FUCKING RIVERS CAN'T KILL ME REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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Hey user Badwater-Chan has forgiven OP since he did the Ford. Now he shall not be actively sabotaged. Just coicendentally.

BUT WHO WAS THE FORDFAGS?

FORDCHADS ARE THE ONES THAT WANTED TO RAFT
YOU FAGGOTS WANTED TO HIRE AN INJUN AND STAY ON LAND

WE

WE MADE IT

SOMEHOW WE MADE IT

OUR JOURNEY THAT WAS DOOMED FROM THE START

WHY DID WE SUCCEED IN THE GAME WE TRIED SO HARD TO DESTROY

IF ONLY TODD HOWARD COULD SEE THIS

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WERE GONNA MAKE IT BROS THERE IT IS

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QUICK Yea Forums POST YOUR VICTORY FACE

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FINAL SCORE

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WE DID IT REDDIT

FUCK YEAH

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WHOOAA WE DID IT
AND ALL OP HAD TO DO WAS SKEW ALL THE VOTES THE WAY HE WANTED!
HOLY EPICSAUCE!

GOD BLESS
I CAN'T BELIEVE I'VE SEEN SUCH A PERFECT RUN OF OREGON TRAIL ON Yea Forums IN MY LIFE

YES WE DID IT

We did it lads

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F for Todd Howard. If only he ate his macronutrients as a kid.

Todd would be proud

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>hire an indian if you take the river
>you faggots wanted to hire an injun and stay on land

TODD IS SMILING DOWN ON US ALL

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THANK YOU BASED TODD HOWARD

You idiot, the indian guide was for the river rafting

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GIVE US ANOTHER ONE

Thanks todd. I might buy your game now.

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Todd is watching us from above

we resisted the tormenting calls of the suicidal fordfags and were rewarded for our efforts

good job caulk gigaomegaultrachads, we done good

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THANK YOU TODD FOR BLESSING US WITH GOD TIER RNG

WE MADE IT ON TO THE LIST OF LEGENDS

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THE FIRST CROP GOES TO PREORDERING SKYRIM 2

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This shit needs to be archived

WE MADE IT, TODD
WE MADE IT!

wait, but we never got the choice to hire the indian or not
So you're saying OP just cheated and took the easy way?

CAULKCHADS RUN THIS SHIT, GET FUCKED FORDFAGS. RIP TODD HOWARD YOU PATHETIC MANLET.

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We did it Yea Forums. High five!

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THANK YOU TODD FOR KEEPING THE BADWATER AWAY

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>0 bullets
>0 wagon parts
Todd died for us.

>see that Willamette Valley? You can reach it

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Badwater-Chan shall reincarnate Todd as Dysentery anons. All is at peace

Let's aim for the top score. Another round!

Weird, apparently when I screenshotted it the text disappeared

Our score was 1980 though

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Which one are we

This is to commemorate those we lost on the way
youtube.com/watch?v=oG7jKUHsLfY

It's been fun riding with you guys

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It's called dressing modestly.

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Find this Stephen Meek, and remove him.

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GUESS

Todd Howard here coming from Heaven. Now that I sacrificed myself so you could win, you'll but Elder scrolls 6 correct?

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Has Yea Forums ever done a run as Trail Guide? Might be interesting

>wagon somehow ends up going to the east coast or just around in circles

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Which thread are you in right now?

Beautiful

I'll pirate it in your honor!

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>buy 0 replacement wagon parts
>wagon doesn't break the entire journey even after TWO rough trails

i dont know what to say

Buy*

it was TODD

I'm actually tearing up right now

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Should we do one more game?

Should we do any special rules or challenges?

;_;
RIP

Yes, but no special rules. Same spitfire nonsense our last games had.

We caulked the wagon twice, all that goo turned our wagon into a super wagon.

FLOAT EVERY RIVER NO MATTER HOW SHALLOW

No supplies
Ford only
Final destination

It was a sweet Wagon, it floated and gave double measles and everything.

RULES ARE FOR FOOLS

badwater kills one person instantly

buy a shit ton of oxen
shit ton of food
nothing else

no food no bullets challenge

ROW ROW ROW YOUR BOAT

How do any of you have the energy for another run? I'm spent

No more vote fixing this time. Actually ruins it to be honest. Everyone is celebrating but I can't get the bad taste of cheating out of my mouth. Forcing certain options to get more votes just ain't right. It's not the Yea Forums way

trail guide or adventurer mode

>It just works

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thank you todd

Kys, autistic ford-virgin

trail guide

>Caulkfag salty he'd never be heard without rigging

it was nice to actually see a fucking successful run instead of LOL LET'S FORD THE 40 FT DEEP RIVER OH LOOK EVERYONE DROWNED every single fucking time, it gets old

Let's do a trail guide run

Y-yeah, so fun to see us win when it was guaranteed from the start because fording or choosing the wrong stuff at the start is literally the only way to lose
>b-b-but what if the wagon broke!
You can fix it.
>but but disease!
We were never in danger of being wiped by it, not once.

lame, low stakes game
But yeah, you won! You did it, here's your participation trophy sweetie! I'm so proud of you!

Only eat what you can kill

Autists should be put down

Alright we'll do one more game. We comfy hours now. Maybe this will be a quick game, maybe not. To those going to bed, thank you for being with us on our last two journeys. We carry on for you.

Five names.

One occupation.

Equal votes on rivers. No resting. Fox only. Final destination.

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GAPPY

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Todd Howard
Merchant

Settlers must die
All Oxen, All bullets
Nothing else.

Capn Falcon

Randy pitchfork

Nimrod
I'm all for the hunting only run

Satoru Iwata

Henry Ford, Merchant

I was only here for the second game. But it was good.

Nigger

F

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nice

NigNig

ALEX CUNNY

Why do we always end up as merchant? Oh well,

What month are we leaving?

saved

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August

JULY

JULY

pick the latest one

Thank you for reminding me why I visit this shithole.

July it is.

For supplies, only the first two replies will decide all of our supplies.

Choose carefully....

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ALL clothes. Nothing else.

ALL OX ALL BULLETS

Full ox
Full clothes
Full bullets
Nothing else
Hunt everything you can

All spare toungues

It is decided.

We shall hunt to survive.

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Nothing but bullets.

Someone needs to hack in a death march to Oregon difficulty.

Todd keeps the change.

Pace and rations.

Also, should we hunt now or just go without food until the first river?

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Nimrod shall regain his fame

I hope your decent at that hunting mini game or this is going to be real short journey

MAX RATIONS
SLOW PACE

We are already doomed, but I'll be optimistic and say we make it half way

Hunt first so we can actually ration things

Hunt

HORY SHIET

PACE=RAPID
FOOD=LOW

make nature your bitch

Minimum rations
Fast pace
hunt first

AND OFF WE GO

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WHAT

IN ONE DAY? WE HAD THAT FOOD

ONE

DAY

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Nice. Let's go.
Fast Pace
Low food
MAXIMUM SURVIVAL PROWESS!

>killing more than twice the amount of animals we can carry
YEEHAW THAT'S THE AMERICAN WAY

>Nimrod shitting all over the meat
Oh boy, here we go.

Do you think the devs intended for hunting for food to be as disgustingly easy as it turned out to be?

Buffalo must have had AIDS before we killed it.

>541 pounds of meat
>4 bullets
holy fuck we're super hunters

LMAO ROTTEN

4 VOTES

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ford

FERRY

FORD

Ferry :^)

caulk it

Todd should be safe, it's only chest high.

FORD IT

Don't blame Nimrod for doing his business like they used to in the olden times

Ford

FERRY TIME

FERRY

Imagine taking a ferry across chest high water.

FERRY

It's knee high at best, and neck high to the manlets

That's like 3.5 times his height.

S E V E N OXEN

IN 3-FOOT DEEP WATER

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We don't want Todd to drown again.

Ford, 3.5 feet doesn't even come up to my dick.

FORD

>Making oxen wear clothes
What the fuck is going on here?

I swear this first river is rigged.

>3 feet
>too deep to ford
They were dead weight anyway. Based water-chan showing us the way.

Alright, who the fuck bought us manlet Oxen?

It does mine.
BECAUSE ITS SO LONG I HAVE TO DRAG IT

even the fucking oxen are manlets

FUCKING FURRIES

Ghosts are back

We didn't want them to be cold

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That was some fast chest high water

ghosts go home.

Go hunting again

We've made it to our second river. It's even more shallow than the first.

3 votes.

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Why the fuck does fog stop you from walking slowly in the same direction you already were?

Ford

Ford again. It's just 3 feet, what could possibly go wrong?

Alright, we'll hunt after the river.

wait

Ford that bitch-ass shit. The manlet oxen are already dead.

FORDDDDDDDDDD

Ford

wait

Ford

That's just it though, say youre set to cross 80 miles in 2 days, the fog slowing you down makes you have to cross 40 miles in two days thus "losing a day"

HOW

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THESE OXEN

WE'VE ALREADY LOST HALF OUR OXEN

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Ah, I see what you're saying. The image makes it look like you're not moving at all and sitting with ghosts

THE WEAK ARE CULLED AND THE STRONG REMAIN

ford

It's just conjecture.
Hunt the manlets

I'm gonna push the mouth button.

Fire.

The buffalo genocide is going well!

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n-not like this fordbros...

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The other half of them better all have forty foot long legs, because we all know what's coming up.

maybe they're just really dumb oxen

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Again, immediately spoiled

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Jesus fucking Christ OP. Nimrod was a good pick.

YEAH SHOOT THOSE FUCKERS

>shot over 20 times the amount we actually needed
That'll teach those damn buffalo.

YOU BOUGHT BLACK OXEN DIDN'T YOU!?

WHAT THE FUCK

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Those injun's aren't going to be happy when they meet you.

This trip isnt doing too well

The buffalo killed my father. They all have to die.

So this is how buffalo got killed to endangerment

FUCK OFF SNEK

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More spoilage

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Hunt again, kill everything

Just means you'll need to hunt 2000 more pounds of buffalo, no biggie.

I am become death, destroyer of buffalo.

This is going very slowly

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MORE spoiled meat

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More like an ox is about to get fucking shot

CAPTAIN FALCON!
youtube.com/watch?v=esY2zdIsKaI

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S-SHE'S BACK

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oxen are just tame buffalo

kill it

what's 4 pounds compared to thousands

wtf man

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This is what happens when you store meat in the designated shitting wagon

HUNT
NIMROD NEEDS TO HUNT OR HE WILL HUNT YOU

DON'T WORRY HE'S BETTER

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Maybe if we shoot and kill Todd his good luck will come back

YES

This run is actually going pretty smoothly

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SHOO SHOO BADWATER-CHAN

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Not on my watch

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Hunt for three days straight

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Alright, once these ghosts leave us alone we shall hunt

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Amazing

very nice

I'm getting flashbacks

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The dust bowl this early? What sort of time wizardry is this?

>Going smoothly

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Christ-chan demands you hunt

Went hunting 2 times in a row, the animals became nonexistent

then immediately bad water

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We are in a fucking drought right now

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Hunt some more, deliver the Buffalo from this mortal coil

Just drink the blood of those we hunt.

J-just a sip

it can't hurt that much, r-right?

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Looking dry out there

this is like 3 days in a row now

our oxen are looking kinda skinny out there

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At least it's warm outside

By the time the Ox starve they'll already be cooked

IT BEGINS

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We're not gonna make it, bros

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NOT FEELIN' SO RANDY

FALCOOOON-Pis tired, let him rest

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Drop the weak ones off, continue with just you and Todd

ACTUALLY HE IS

SOMEONE'S GOTTA MAKE BATTLEBORN

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Shoot him please, for the good of all humanity

After a series of bad waters and no grass, we've arrived at ye 40 foot deep river

4 votes.

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Float

Float. Oxen have proven too short.

Ford it, thread's kinda dead anyways. Might as well kill Randy while we're at it.

FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORD

FORD

Ford it, end this miserable run

That's all, folks

im_glad_is_over.jpg

First reply decides the epitaph

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Fuck Fordfags

In memoriam of those brave souls too damn short to ford.

In Memory of the Hunters
They hated Buffalo

Ford Tough

kek

We should have stopped at two games. Oh well.

Thanks for sticking around guys, I'll see you all next thread

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Thanks blessed OP

Godspeed, OP. May all your rivers be forded.

We'll always remember that second run

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That was fucking awesome.

youtube.com/watch?v=LpK6CcKRpe0&t=45
todd turned of vsynch, giving our wagon super powers