125 MILES TO GO
TODD HOWARD IS WATCHING OVER US, OUR DOOMED PARTY MIGHT ACTUALLY MAKE IT
125 MILES TO GO
TODD HOWARD IS WATCHING OVER US, OUR DOOMED PARTY MIGHT ACTUALLY MAKE IT
First for FORD
DO IT FOR TODD
LET'S GOOOOOOOO
Caulkchads, stay vigilant.
WE CAN DO THIS
GO GO GO
EAT MORE
BADWATER-CHAN IS BACK BUT SHE CAN'T STOP US
WE'VE COME TOO FAR
>the dalles
are we paying homage to terry davis as well?
FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD
Aye, sir
Based and Fordpilled
You aren't Chad's, only fags like caulk.
FORDCHADS LETS GOOOOO
IDS HABBENING LABS
It's the final stretch boys
THE DALLES IS IN SIGHT
OUR FINAL OBSTACLE
F
Nigga you gay. Badwater-Chan is giving you one last chance to ford.
TIME OUT
GO GO GO GALO SENGEN
YOU KNOW WHAT WE DOIN BOYS
WE'RE GONNA GET FUCKED
The ghost of Todd won't let you.
Keep going!
WE'VE MADE IT TO THE DALLES
We can do this bros
'Aint hirin' no dag gum Injun.
FUCK INDIANS
RAFT THAT SHIT
4 VOTES DECIDES HOW WE REACH OREGON
RAFT
UNLESS HE'S FROM THE FORD TRIBE HE CAN FUCK RIGHT OFF
You hear the blue safari, hire an injun!
hire that fucking redskin
toll road
RAFT
RAFT! FORD! IA BADWATER-CHAN!!!
LISTEN TO THIS WISE MAN
FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD
DOWN THE RIVER
Raft
RAFT THAT SHIT
RAFT NIGGAS
TOLL ROAD
ROAD
TOLL ROAD
ONE FINAL FORD
RAFT
ROADS BUILT FOR FORDS VEHICLES
RAFT
SCREW THE JEW
RAFT
MOUNTAIN MAN
TAKE ME BY THE HAND
LEAD ME TO THE LAND
Pay the toll
WE DONT HAVE ANY MONEY
FORD IT
AAAAAAAAAAAA
River!
River is the only option
The ultimate ford. Badwater-chan will be pleased.
RAFT and HIRE INDIAN
...
WE CANT PAY THE TOLL
WE NEED TO BECOME ONE WITH THE RIVER
ignore ford fags, we're actually gonna die if we don't go on the road
RAFT YOU SON OF A BITCH
...
WHY IS EVERYONE SCREAMING
i don't burn no coal
i won't pay no toll
AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
WHY AREN'T YOU SCREAMING
IM GONNA SAY THE N WORD!
Because we're all in a cramped as fuck wagon and we want to throw our opinions at the driver.
toll
road
OH GOD I CANT LOOK
HERE WE GO
SCREAMINGS THE FORD WAY
FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRD
FOOOORD
SANIC SPEED BABY
NO TURNING BACK NOW
OH GOD OH FUCK
Oh shit we raftin. Official theme:
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it's fuckin' on
DON'T FUCK UP!!
RIP,
HORY SHIIIIITTT
THE FINAL BOSS
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
VERY fast wagon floating at incerdibel hihg speed
>
FASTER AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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This is it bros. It's been an honor caulking with you all.
Aaaaaaaaaaaah fuck! It's go time
GOGOGO
FOOOOOOOOOOORD
DONT FUCK THIS UP
BADWATER-CHAN HAS APPROVED YOU!
OH SHIT ITS HAPPENDING
OH MY FUCKING GOD YAAAASS
get fucked, fordfags
We're alive!
FUCK YOU BADWATER-CHAN, WE'LL CONQUER THIS FUCKING RIVER!
THANK YOU FORD GODS
YEEEEEEEES
WE MADE IT!!!!
WE DID IT REDDIT
FUUUUCK YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAA CHECK EM NIIGGGER
WE DID IT
WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE
get fucked
my god what the fuck is homer thinking about
FUCKING RIVERS CAN'T KILL ME REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Hey user Badwater-Chan has forgiven OP since he did the Ford. Now he shall not be actively sabotaged. Just coicendentally.
BUT WHO WAS THE FORDFAGS?
FORDCHADS ARE THE ONES THAT WANTED TO RAFT
YOU FAGGOTS WANTED TO HIRE AN INJUN AND STAY ON LAND
WE
WE MADE IT
SOMEHOW WE MADE IT
OUR JOURNEY THAT WAS DOOMED FROM THE START
WHY DID WE SUCCEED IN THE GAME WE TRIED SO HARD TO DESTROY
IF ONLY TODD HOWARD COULD SEE THIS
WERE GONNA MAKE IT BROS THERE IT IS
QUICK Yea Forums POST YOUR VICTORY FACE
FINAL SCORE
WE DID IT REDDIT
FUCK YEAH
WHOOAA WE DID IT
AND ALL OP HAD TO DO WAS SKEW ALL THE VOTES THE WAY HE WANTED!
HOLY EPICSAUCE!
GOD BLESS
I CAN'T BELIEVE I'VE SEEN SUCH A PERFECT RUN OF OREGON TRAIL ON Yea Forums IN MY LIFE
YES WE DID IT
We did it lads
F for Todd Howard. If only he ate his macronutrients as a kid.
Todd would be proud
>hire an indian if you take the river
>you faggots wanted to hire an injun and stay on land
TODD IS SMILING DOWN ON US ALL
THANK YOU BASED TODD HOWARD
You idiot, the indian guide was for the river rafting
GIVE US ANOTHER ONE
Thanks todd. I might buy your game now.
Todd is watching us from above
we resisted the tormenting calls of the suicidal fordfags and were rewarded for our efforts
good job caulk gigaomegaultrachads, we done good
THANK YOU TODD FOR BLESSING US WITH GOD TIER RNG
WE MADE IT ON TO THE LIST OF LEGENDS
THE FIRST CROP GOES TO PREORDERING SKYRIM 2
This shit needs to be archived
WE MADE IT, TODD
WE MADE IT!
wait, but we never got the choice to hire the indian or not
So you're saying OP just cheated and took the easy way?
CAULKCHADS RUN THIS SHIT, GET FUCKED FORDFAGS. RIP TODD HOWARD YOU PATHETIC MANLET.
We did it Yea Forums. High five!
THANK YOU TODD FOR KEEPING THE BADWATER AWAY
>0 bullets
>0 wagon parts
Todd died for us.
>see that Willamette Valley? You can reach it
Badwater-Chan shall reincarnate Todd as Dysentery anons. All is at peace
Let's aim for the top score. Another round!
Weird, apparently when I screenshotted it the text disappeared
Our score was 1980 though
Which one are we
This is to commemorate those we lost on the way
youtube.com
It's been fun riding with you guys
It's called dressing modestly.
Find this Stephen Meek, and remove him.
GUESS
Todd Howard here coming from Heaven. Now that I sacrificed myself so you could win, you'll but Elder scrolls 6 correct?
Has Yea Forums ever done a run as Trail Guide? Might be interesting
>wagon somehow ends up going to the east coast or just around in circles
Which thread are you in right now?
Beautiful
I'll pirate it in your honor!
>buy 0 replacement wagon parts
>wagon doesn't break the entire journey even after TWO rough trails
i dont know what to say
Buy*
it was TODD
I'm actually tearing up right now
Should we do one more game?
Should we do any special rules or challenges?
;_;
RIP
Yes, but no special rules. Same spitfire nonsense our last games had.
We caulked the wagon twice, all that goo turned our wagon into a super wagon.
FLOAT EVERY RIVER NO MATTER HOW SHALLOW
No supplies
Ford only
Final destination
It was a sweet Wagon, it floated and gave double measles and everything.
RULES ARE FOR FOOLS
badwater kills one person instantly
buy a shit ton of oxen
shit ton of food
nothing else
no food no bullets challenge
ROW ROW ROW YOUR BOAT
How do any of you have the energy for another run? I'm spent
No more vote fixing this time. Actually ruins it to be honest. Everyone is celebrating but I can't get the bad taste of cheating out of my mouth. Forcing certain options to get more votes just ain't right. It's not the Yea Forums way
trail guide or adventurer mode
>It just works
thank you todd
Kys, autistic ford-virgin
trail guide
>Caulkfag salty he'd never be heard without rigging
it was nice to actually see a fucking successful run instead of LOL LET'S FORD THE 40 FT DEEP RIVER OH LOOK EVERYONE DROWNED every single fucking time, it gets old
Let's do a trail guide run
Y-yeah, so fun to see us win when it was guaranteed from the start because fording or choosing the wrong stuff at the start is literally the only way to lose
>b-b-but what if the wagon broke!
You can fix it.
>but but disease!
We were never in danger of being wiped by it, not once.
lame, low stakes game
But yeah, you won! You did it, here's your participation trophy sweetie! I'm so proud of you!
Only eat what you can kill
Autists should be put down
Alright we'll do one more game. We comfy hours now. Maybe this will be a quick game, maybe not. To those going to bed, thank you for being with us on our last two journeys. We carry on for you.
Five names.
One occupation.
Equal votes on rivers. No resting. Fox only. Final destination.
GAPPY
Todd Howard
Merchant
Settlers must die
All Oxen, All bullets
Nothing else.
Capn Falcon
Randy pitchfork
Nimrod
I'm all for the hunting only run
Satoru Iwata
Henry Ford, Merchant
I was only here for the second game. But it was good.
Nigger
F
nice
NigNig
ALEX CUNNY
Why do we always end up as merchant? Oh well,
What month are we leaving?
saved
August
JULY
JULY
pick the latest one
Thank you for reminding me why I visit this shithole.
July it is.
For supplies, only the first two replies will decide all of our supplies.
Choose carefully....
ALL clothes. Nothing else.
ALL OX ALL BULLETS
Full ox
Full clothes
Full bullets
Nothing else
Hunt everything you can
All spare toungues
It is decided.
We shall hunt to survive.
Nothing but bullets.
Someone needs to hack in a death march to Oregon difficulty.
Todd keeps the change.
Pace and rations.
Also, should we hunt now or just go without food until the first river?
Nimrod shall regain his fame
I hope your decent at that hunting mini game or this is going to be real short journey
MAX RATIONS
SLOW PACE
We are already doomed, but I'll be optimistic and say we make it half way
Hunt first so we can actually ration things
Hunt
HORY SHIET
PACE=RAPID
FOOD=LOW
make nature your bitch
Minimum rations
Fast pace
hunt first
AND OFF WE GO
WHAT
IN ONE DAY? WE HAD THAT FOOD
ONE
DAY
Nice. Let's go.
Fast Pace
Low food
MAXIMUM SURVIVAL PROWESS!
>killing more than twice the amount of animals we can carry
YEEHAW THAT'S THE AMERICAN WAY
>Nimrod shitting all over the meat
Oh boy, here we go.
Do you think the devs intended for hunting for food to be as disgustingly easy as it turned out to be?
Buffalo must have had AIDS before we killed it.
>541 pounds of meat
>4 bullets
holy fuck we're super hunters
LMAO ROTTEN
4 VOTES
ford
FERRY
FORD
Ferry :^)
caulk it
Todd should be safe, it's only chest high.
FORD IT
Don't blame Nimrod for doing his business like they used to in the olden times
Ford
FERRY TIME
FERRY
Imagine taking a ferry across chest high water.
FERRY
It's knee high at best, and neck high to the manlets
That's like 3.5 times his height.
S E V E N OXEN
IN 3-FOOT DEEP WATER
We don't want Todd to drown again.
Ford, 3.5 feet doesn't even come up to my dick.
FORD
>Making oxen wear clothes
What the fuck is going on here?
I swear this first river is rigged.
>3 feet
>too deep to ford
They were dead weight anyway. Based water-chan showing us the way.
Alright, who the fuck bought us manlet Oxen?
It does mine.
BECAUSE ITS SO LONG I HAVE TO DRAG IT
even the fucking oxen are manlets
FUCKING FURRIES
Ghosts are back
We didn't want them to be cold
That was some fast chest high water
ghosts go home.
Go hunting again
We've made it to our second river. It's even more shallow than the first.
3 votes.
Why the fuck does fog stop you from walking slowly in the same direction you already were?
Ford
Ford again. It's just 3 feet, what could possibly go wrong?
Alright, we'll hunt after the river.
wait
Ford that bitch-ass shit. The manlet oxen are already dead.
FORDDDDDDDDDD
Ford
wait
Ford
That's just it though, say youre set to cross 80 miles in 2 days, the fog slowing you down makes you have to cross 40 miles in two days thus "losing a day"
HOW
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THESE OXEN
WE'VE ALREADY LOST HALF OUR OXEN
Ah, I see what you're saying. The image makes it look like you're not moving at all and sitting with ghosts
THE WEAK ARE CULLED AND THE STRONG REMAIN
ford
It's just conjecture.
Hunt the manlets
I'm gonna push the mouth button.
Fire.
The buffalo genocide is going well!
n-not like this fordbros...
The other half of them better all have forty foot long legs, because we all know what's coming up.
maybe they're just really dumb oxen
Again, immediately spoiled
Jesus fucking Christ OP. Nimrod was a good pick.
YEAH SHOOT THOSE FUCKERS
>shot over 20 times the amount we actually needed
That'll teach those damn buffalo.
YOU BOUGHT BLACK OXEN DIDN'T YOU!?
WHAT THE FUCK
Those injun's aren't going to be happy when they meet you.
This trip isnt doing too well
The buffalo killed my father. They all have to die.
So this is how buffalo got killed to endangerment
FUCK OFF SNEK
More spoilage
Hunt again, kill everything
Just means you'll need to hunt 2000 more pounds of buffalo, no biggie.
I am become death, destroyer of buffalo.
This is going very slowly
MORE spoiled meat
More like an ox is about to get fucking shot
CAPTAIN FALCON!
youtube.com
S-SHE'S BACK
oxen are just tame buffalo
kill it
what's 4 pounds compared to thousands
wtf man
This is what happens when you store meat in the designated shitting wagon
HUNT
NIMROD NEEDS TO HUNT OR HE WILL HUNT YOU
DON'T WORRY HE'S BETTER
Maybe if we shoot and kill Todd his good luck will come back
YES
This run is actually going pretty smoothly
SHOO SHOO BADWATER-CHAN
Not on my watch
Hunt for three days straight
Alright, once these ghosts leave us alone we shall hunt
Amazing
very nice
I'm getting flashbacks
The dust bowl this early? What sort of time wizardry is this?
>Going smoothly
Christ-chan demands you hunt
Went hunting 2 times in a row, the animals became nonexistent
then immediately bad water
We are in a fucking drought right now
Hunt some more, deliver the Buffalo from this mortal coil
Just drink the blood of those we hunt.
J-just a sip
it can't hurt that much, r-right?
Looking dry out there
this is like 3 days in a row now
our oxen are looking kinda skinny out there
At least it's warm outside
By the time the Ox starve they'll already be cooked
IT BEGINS
We're not gonna make it, bros
NOT FEELIN' SO RANDY
FALCOOOON-Pis tired, let him rest
Drop the weak ones off, continue with just you and Todd
ACTUALLY HE IS
SOMEONE'S GOTTA MAKE BATTLEBORN
Shoot him please, for the good of all humanity
After a series of bad waters and no grass, we've arrived at ye 40 foot deep river
4 votes.
Float
Float. Oxen have proven too short.
Ford it, thread's kinda dead anyways. Might as well kill Randy while we're at it.
FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORD
FORD
Ford it, end this miserable run
That's all, folks
im_glad_is_over.jpg
First reply decides the epitaph
Fuck Fordfags
In memoriam of those brave souls too damn short to ford.
In Memory of the Hunters
They hated Buffalo
Ford Tough
kek
We should have stopped at two games. Oh well.
Thanks for sticking around guys, I'll see you all next thread
Thanks blessed OP
Godspeed, OP. May all your rivers be forded.
We'll always remember that second run
That was fucking awesome.
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todd turned of vsynch, giving our wagon super powers