You wake up on Noveria

>ynr that one turian mechanic with an inexplicably long name

And brooklyn accent. What's up with that?

I would find this mechanic and fuck him.

Attached: 1556113428.gif (790x655, 75K)

i fucking hate the mako so much

I won't lie I'd probably fuck the Rachni Queen.

Reminder that slavery, or "indentured servitude" is actively practiced on Noveria. An asari calmly explains how the system works, and her human slave is grateful and obedient.

Dawg I was always a fan of this series but when I got that shit on ps3 it was fucking terrible not only that I was always lost but damn such a good game

i'd fuck the asari matriarch

user, please. Rachni are extinct.

Not if my dick has anything to say about it. And it does!

Yeah right next you'll be telling me you believe in Reapers or something.

>implying you wouldn't submit fully to your ageless blue mommy-wife and give up your personhood to her while you raise her blue kids

>AnCap - the planet
>It's in the future so literally nothing I know is useful
I can only hope some turian or krogan chad takes me in as an indentured servant and fucks me.

Re- what now?

If you're not outside, sure

Don't you pay attention to the extranet? That human Spectre was ranting about reapers or something like that perhaps it's sleepers who knows but they're some spooky shit apparently. I think the humans just want a big bad to defeat so they can become even more self important.

ASARI ARE PARASITES!
WAKE UP!
They are attractive to every other species, but they only produce offspring that are asari. They take the our best genetic traits and absorb them into their species.
THEY ARE LEECHES AND SUCCUBI! DO NOT FALL FOR THEIR CHARMS!
SQUASH THE BLUEBERRIES!
and never, EVER trust a Quarian.

Attached: 1546500379153.jpg (250x300, 14K)

>Shepard lets all the slimy alien council members die and makes Anderson the new ruler of the galaxy
>A few years later aliens run the council again and Anderson is just back to being some military jackass
I don't want to wake up on Noveria or anywhere else

Looking like that and not being able to force responsibility on me, I'm extremely fine with it.

The idea that there could ever be a human only council was one of the more retarded things ME1 tried to present as a serious idea

I chose Udina and he ended up being the head of the council in 2, but the council was irrelevant

I liked dicking around in Mako in Noveria
Also fuck that salarian ceo guy

ANOLEIS ANOLEIS

OOOOOOO ANOLEIS

youtube.com/watch?v=M2E1m90YSpA

Say, all that shady stuff going on and not a single "Gentlemen's Club". What gives?

Attached: 1521118716400.jpg (1280x867, 644K)

>ywn play me1 for the first two times
>ywn go to Noveria for the first two times

It's a dismal, frozen shithole of a planet that's cold even in the main port. No one really wants to be there, they're just middle management assigned to keep tabs on their employer's secret, illegal experiments and none of those employers are going to let something like alcohol and whores potentially loosen the tongue of one of their employees.

salarian management

guaranteed they were around, just hidden away because the patrons were using them to deal in narcotics and sex slaves

>hidden away on a planet outside the law

the events of the game show that even if they're ""outside the law"" they'd do well not to attract attention

Asaris are all bitches
Turians are retards
Salarians are frogs

Humanity is the natural leader.

Rape

You'd have to try pretty fucking hard to get more attention than huge corporations performing illegal, unethical research outside Council law on a technicality. You could land a ship made entirely out of drugs in the port and still be the least sketchy thing on the entire planet.