ITT: Games you can't play for retarded/petty reasons

Undertale.
Find pic related around 2014 in some thread about indie games.
>I'm bowled over with it's tone and charm and discover it's kickstarter. It's due for release the following year in september.
>After playing the demo, I share it with some friends of mine in hopes they would check it out.
>At the time they just kinda brush it off.
>"haha user it's looks neat, reminds me of earthbound" And other remarks like that.
>fast forward to next year
>I buy the game on release day, but I was starting a new job that week and life got in the way of me really wanting to sit down and play it.
>game becomes massively popular
>both of the friends I showed the game off to end up messaging me about a cool new game that came out.
>"user you have to check out this cool new game! It's amazing, it's incredible, the dialogue is snappy and humorous. The story and mechanics are unlike anything you see in most modern games! You have to check it out!"
>alright, what is this game?
>"It's undertale user! It's the most amazing game right now. You have to play it user! It'll change your life. Mow your lawn. Pay your taxes. Wash your dishes and bring back your dead childhood pet.You gotta play it user. YOU GOTTA PLAY IT!"

It's petty as all get out. But since my friends somehow forgot that I was the one who introduced them to it and that they've become obssessed over it is the biggest reason why I wont touch undertale til the day I'm put in the grave. Even I can't believe the amount of 'tism this whole spat has produced.

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Imagine how much you can lord over them now, though. You're basically their god.

Why didn't you just say "Dont you remember me sending the kickstarter last year?"
Why does this make you mad? This is just you being a hipster if anything.

I can't play Last of us, because I hate women.

I quit Witcher 3 because in one of the quests for the hidden treasure, I was not able to loot the crate because it was ''bugged''. This was somewhere in the beginning of the game, next to some abandoned windmill if I recall correctly. Apparently, this issue is known for developers but they haven't fixed it to this day. It completely destroyed my immersion into the game and as a completionist I refuse to continue this game.

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I did. They said they don't recall me sending them it and think I was telling them about LISA or something similar. I remember telling them about UT through steam chat and since it didn't save past messages at the time I couldn't tell provide 'evidence'
Even when I showed them that gif, they just draw blanks on it.

Sounds like autism.

Alright, I can sort of see how you're mad now, because I'm sort of mad now.

I can't stand female protagonists since my childhood and i've missed quite a few games because of it.
One of a few exceptions were Trails.

Refused to buy/play Cuphead until a mod to fix the chromatic aberration was a thing. Fuck chromatic aberration.
Also the reason why I'd refuse to buy it on a console.

I can't play A Hat in Time anymore because they decided to put thier identity politics in the game on full display to everyone to see.

I can't play Stardew Valley despite being a Bokujou fan, because I don't like the character designs and don't like modding basic features of a game.

can't play any of souls/borne/hollowknight/fungusknigts games, because they are soooo fucking unattractive, if you know what I mean. No fanservice, no buy, no wasting time with it

I can't play games where the main character has a British accent.

Before I play a game I google if the game has any missables.
If it does then I refuse to play it depending on how long the entire game is.

I can't play Farm Simulator because I don't want to hire people but the game forces me to hire people to do jobs. I just want to do it all by myself, why turn the fucking game into a employment center simulator

I've read this in his voice

I refuse to play the MCC because they lumped the three games into one package and the achievements don't show up separately for each game. I just think it's ugly and I rather play each game as a standalone game.

I refuse to play KANTOOOOOOOOOO Pokémon games (unless it's HGSS) because my genwun older brother (8 years my senior, btw) broke my favorite Rayquaza toy and threw away my copy of Pokémon Emerald after I offhandedly told him I thought FireRed was kind of lame

>he doesn't play kf2 solo

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Metroid Prime is a masterpiece. She doesn't talk either so maybe you would forget you're playing as a girl.

I can't play watch dogs because in the intro tutorial, there is a QTE event and if you don't hit the button it doesn't change anything. Made me uninstall the game right there.

I can't play Beyond Good and Evil for more than five minutes without having to go rub one out because Jade is just too sexy.

the first pathologic
for whatever reason it is the only game in first person perspective that is physically impossible for me to play for any longer than 10minutes

I can't play any first persona game, because I can nit deal with the first person camera angle.
I fucking hate it and it always annoys me when a game switches to a first person perspective.
I don't even like it in cutscenes

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I usually don't finish any video game unless I know it has a bittersweet ending

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Refuse to play the Taxman port of Sonic CD on PC because of the many layers of port that version went through it fucked with the image scaling and everything shimmers.

I've dropped a lot of non-platformers for having unpleasant jump arcs, but Half Life has the most egregious one. It feels like he's just lifting up from a crouch.
I have a low tolerance for games with regen health because they always end up being some cover-based bullshit.
I usually drop games that I can't beat in 40 hours because when I start to get bored of a game I begin convincing myself the game is going to have an unsatisfying ending.

You could turn it off day 1.

I can't play first person games other than minecraft because I want to feel like I have four hands

You can lower it but you can't completely turn it off.

It's the field of view. I had a friend that couldn't play half life 1 for the same reason.

>game has 60fps lock
that's a no from me. I even have a 60hz monitor but 99% of the time the framerate is locked with some bullshit method that adds a bunch of mouse delay.

I was gonna say “get better friends” but my friends are pretty much the same way

Fair enough.
First time I noticed CA was on bloodborne, I don't hate the effect but I couldn't look at it for hours. Really is a fucking stupid trend.

If a game has any kind of political message, whether it be left or right, I avoid it like the plague. There’s no need for it in games. It’s the main reason I didn’t buy Mortal Kombat 11

What is chromatic abberation?

I got lost in the first three hours of nu-doom, a year ago and haven't touched it since.

A shitty aftereffect meant to simulate a low quality, improperly calibrated physical camera. You may think I'm exaggerating, but I'm literally not.

I can't play Witcher 3 because I've yet to play Witcher 2, and I can't play 2 because I haven't finished the 1st one yet and it was a year since I played it.

Fuck.

Red/blue colour bleed. It's like lens flair in that it's a camera error that video games now deside to program in.

what newer games are you even looking forward to? all new games are political.

Used to be a huge fan of the Battlefield series since BF1942 but EA and DICE handled the BF5 controversy so badly it retroactively ruined the whole series for me. I haven't touched a BF game in almost a year and don't miss it

> t. /pol/ poster
It's in your paranoid imagination. A few games are political, but the vast majority are not in any meaningful way

In real life it's when you have a lens that doesn't redirect light properly, causing some of the light to split into it's red/green/yellow/blue/etc. colours and be misaligned. Also applies to VHS with really low quality tapes and players sometimes where colour channels become misaligned. It's the kind of thing professionals spend a LOT of time trying to remove because it looks ugly.
Some retards within the last decade decided they liked this look and decided to apply it to ALL the things, drawn images, video games, etc. In Cupheads case it was because the creators watched all those old cartoons on VHS and wanted to replicate the look they remember from their childhood, even though the original cartoons had no such issues when originally projected on theater screens.

kek

>all new games are political.
No they aren't.

I get how ya feel user. A while back I showed my sister and her friend halo 3 and told her about how much I loved playing it. My sisters friend just called it generic space marines and was a huge dick about it. It made me feel pretty sad considering how much I loved playing it and how it helped me make friends with school for the first time in my life.

Fast forward a year later my sister and her friends is all about halo cause some youtubers they started watched were in to it. I think it was rooster teeth or achievement hunter or whatever. It made me pretty pissed cause they bought all the old games and were playing them despite being such assholes about it before.

I can't play dark souls because the retarded proportion of the character

i don't have any because i'm not a giant faggot looking for excuses to not play games

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Same here

There’s not a lot of new games I’m looking forward. I mostly just play older stuff

>got in front of the hype and introduced the game to my friends during the kickstarter and the full release
>no one cared either way
Wouldn't be the first or last time it's happened.
No one takes game suggestions from their friends I guess, unless it's already on their radar.

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If a game is bad. Then I won't play it

Do you guys have a video or picture to showcase this effect? I still don’t really get it..

>love Alien
>love Alien Isolation
>can't play it because I'm scared

Also I don't play total war games because it's too much times

I know I shouldn't spoonfeed, but here you go.

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I feel like I’ve seen this effect in some games when you quickly move the camera in a direction. Is that what you mean? I don’t remember this in cuphead

>people with working vision have to see the world like blind people now
AH HA HA HA HA HOW DOES IT FEEL NOW YOU KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE NOT SO FUN HUH! I LIKE CHROMATIC ABBERATION BECAUSE IM BLIND!

Thanks for understanding guys.

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I hate any game where children are invincible, especially those that allow you to kill adults with no problem.

Same fucking thing happened to me with the game Freedom Planet. I introduced several friends to it and it became their favorite game. The. When I remind them about it they refuse to accept that I tipsed them about it >:V

I can't face any type of challenge, either be a puzzle game or a fighting game, etc.
I also get super anxious fighting or competing other people either strangers or friends, with friends is way worse because they can see my face almost crying

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I can't play Symphonia chronicles because of its retarded 30FPS lock. I'm too used to playing the original at 60FPS that every little thing I do in the game irks me because of how sped up it is.

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I don't know how retarded this is but I can't play heavily loot based games that have ugly EQ like MHW. To me if your game is centered around EQ it should at least look appealing.

You're thinking of motion blur, which is equally as shitty and among the first things I personally turn off. In that example image it's not the blurriness you should be focusing on (ha), it's the split on colours around the edges of objects.

I wouldn't say I CAN'T play them, but I have zero interest in horror games. Or horror movies/shows for that matter. They all feel like the same uninspired shit pulling from John Carpenter or Korean retellings. Jumpscares rarely get me either. They just end up coming across as unintentionally comedic.

wont play dont starve because fighting in it is complete shit. too bad i love the aesthetics

You can literally mod any animation in skyrim

Won't play any Ubisoft game because they all just feel "off" All of the Farcrys after the original suffer from this soulless emptiness.

I don't play console games because I view them a fundamentally different from PC game.
Yes, this means I don't play PC ports too and that I only seldom play games that come out on all platforms at the same time.
Any game that feels like it's not "at home" on PC is bad from my perspective. And I don't play it.

Not me but my brother can't play Twilight Princess because of Link's running animation

I can't replay Bethesda titles such as The Elder Scrolls or nu-Fallout because I can't be fucked to dig through mods, and all the whole nine yards of trial and error just to become bored of what I've already done numerous times.

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i never play games when they have a "free weekend" because it's a fucking scam
what is the actual point of being able to play a game for like 2 or 3 days and then having to buy it? why not just release a demo version so that i won't to stop whatever i'm doing and play as much of this game as i can? with a demo i at least don't have to be in a rush and it also has the benefit of letting me learn more about a game before i buy it
but instead every fucking game needs to have a "FREE WEEKEND" every once in a while, so i get access to the full thing and then BAM, after just 2 FUCKING DAYS i get blocked by a paywall. because it's SO HARD to make a demo version or just GIVE THE GOD DAMN GAME AWAY
why the hell do i even buy games if devs and publishers pull off shit like this, fuck this

boohoo people exist and I have an empathy deficit

I don't play shooters because the gun sounds annoy me. Not that I get headaches from the sounds, I just don't like it. I will play games with guns, but only if it's not the majority of the gameplay, like in Deus Ex or something

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I can’t play Kingdom Hearts because Disney characters are gay and the other characters are really cringy.

>I can't play Skyrim because I hate the idle stance of the female NPCs

Same but Vampire the Masquerade: Bloodlines

Why do you need to denigrate an entire genre to try to compensate for your own deficiency?

It's advertising you numpty.

starwars is the answer

do you know where you are?

and that makes it better in what way?

yeah but I'm not hugely into star wars - and I would have to play Battlefront which I hear is kinda bad.
I'm pretty content with playing games that just have swords and magic instead.

advertising isn't a scam you dumbass. You're literally complaining about free shit because it's inconvenient

Skyward Sword because it has a gorillion resources/collectables and it gives you a long interruption and description for every individual one each time you cold boot the game
20 hours in? did you just pick up your 50th hunk of iron? if you just booted up the game enjoy the 20 second interruption. oh look there's a piece of amber...

would you say there's so much. goddamn. WAITING! in Skyward Sword?

It's really an issue with most of the Zelda games, don't know why they do it.

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>posts the guy who skipped through Fi's tutorial that explained a feature and then immediately afterwards complained the game didn't have that specific feature

Incineroar posters made me hate smash

I can't play Final Fantasy 9 because you permanently miss out on stat-gains unless you level in the absolute most retarded way possible (not leveling at all until the end when you have the right gear). Even if you level to 99, your stats aren't even close to maxed, so the missed stat gains are always relevant.

It's not even a game with enemies difficult enough to actually need the min-maxed stats, I just hate the feeling of permanently missing stats. What a genuinely retarded mechanic.

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I can handle it in all of the other games but for some reason I couldn't deal with it in SS
First it made me avoid resources and then it just made me avoid starting up the game. I tried to play it 3 different times and couldn't get into it, which is strange because every other 3D Zelda has completely hooked me right from the start