Why won't this bitch marry me

Once you'vs had a gods spear inside you nothing else quite matches up.

Skyrim is sick but have you checked out elder scrolls Blades on your phones? It's pretty dope it still is missing a lot but it's not too bad for how new it is here is a gameplay video on how to beat trolls if you guys want to check it out.
youtu.be/1QggfgWqRso

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How much of a smooth brain do you have to be mad that you had to watch a narrative unfold instead of UGH SMASH BRAIN HURT

>RPG
>forced to do anything

You joined a Vampire hunter company.
So you save a vampire, that has an elder scroll, not only do you not even make an attempt to kill it, you help to deliver the elder scroll to the strongest vampire family around.
See where is the problem?

fuck off faggot

nexusmods.com/skyrim/mods/28685/

seriously nigger

>Dawnguard's one saving grace was the Forgotten Valley
And the armor user, dawnguard armor is pure aesthetic.

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>game series known for putting player choice first to the point where you can kill important NPCs and fuck up the timeline yet are allowed to keep going
>suddenly series turns into a puppet show with long stretches of standing around watching terribly animated ESL characters club through their lines, where you can’t kill any of them until Papa Todd lets you
>”HURRRRR UR BRAINLET FOR NOT LIEKING STORY!”
Don’t you have a Fallout 76 to be wasting money on, zoomer?

but it's a cute girl vampire you retard

You get to murder them later

>Playing a roleplaying game
>Roleplay as a vampire hunter as the game allows me to do so
>Meet Vampires
>Cant try to kill them
>Have to listen to them talk and go through a bunch of bullshit just to attempt kill them.
user... I think you're retarded

>Advertising mobileshit

It's one fucking quest you dumb shits.

>see thing
>kill it
>ooga booga

HATE VAMPIRES

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>be vampire hunter
>don't kill vampires

I wanted to like Blades but it's a huge disappointment. I uninstalled it like a week ago after losing half an hour to it and feeling like a tard for not just playing Skyrim or Fallout or something else that pulls off what Blades pretends to.

>vampire hunter
>see vampire
>kill it
If only an "RPG" like Skyrim would let me do some ooga booga

>be "vampire hunter"
>guy literally said "kill them shits here's a crossbow
>my motivation for this scene is "ooga"
>this is my only character trait as I have no nuance and am incapable of intelligent thought

>see thing
>kill it

>>see thing
>>kill it
That's the problem. You can't.

You can, you killed 10 to get to her.

But hey, maybe this one is more important. Maybe the one that attempts to talk to you is more important. Maybe the one with a legendary artifact on it's back is important. Maybe the one that different is different.

>ooga
>smash
>why cant me kill?
>bad game

>get told to kill all the vampires
>don't kill them

But I can't kill the vampire, I have to take her across the map with a fucking Elder Scroll on her back
The game won't even let me ooga, should I desire to
Which part of this aren't you getting?

If you killed her right there and got the scroll then Harkon would have been unable to do anything, killer her there would have saved hours of work.

>Maybe the one that different is different.
>"Hey, escort me to my big bad vampire dad, he wants this Elder Scroll really bad."
And that's where you go "No."

>see sexy vampire
>OOGA BOOGA WAIFU

it should be possible but very hard to do if your character is low level, necessitating the dawnguard story line. if your character is a high level half-god that just came back from fucking another millenia old dragonborn in the ass, he should be able to finish off some faggy vampire lord

>Wanting Molag als used goods

>vampire literally have magic to charm people
>lol lets just talk to them

That's just garden variety Bethesda game design, m8.

I want to try it but it's not compatible with my device.

NO MY CHARACTER ISN'T ALLOWED TO LOSE

Hello, Tœdd

god I want to lick her sculpted jawline

>fight a group of always evil monsters
>find one with an important macguffin that tells you not to kill her
>no option to kill or entirely distrust her on the basis that she's a (hitherto fully-proven) evil monster that also has an important macguffin
>this turns out really bad for everyone involved, especially the people you're working for

Thanks Bethesda, I'm really happy you forced me along that path.

you make me tired

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>Kill Serena
>Take Elder Scroll
>No leads to Harkon
Or
>Follow Serena
>Meet Harkon
>Shout the fucker down before he can transform
>Instantly jumped by hoards vampiric mutts and rat faced vampires
Or
>Tell Harmon to fuck off
>Go back to Dawngaurd
>Tell them everything, including the location
>Go hunt for more followers
>Carry out attacks on Harkon’s Castle
>All recruits die, 1v1 Harkon
>Kill Serena

Hold on. Is this a thread NON-modded Serana?

Did I step into the twilight zone?

I'll stop just for you.

>he doesn't use a mod to disable attacks in cities

i REALLY want to cum inside loli Serana

Bal beat you to the punch

Which Daedric lord rapes them in the afterlife? Molag Bal? Is that true or is it just Divine propaganda? Maybe they're just partying all day.

>NO MY CHARACTER ISN'T ALLOWED TO CHOOSE
FTFY

vanilla serana is unironically hotter than the shitty uguu waifumods

>Is that true or is it just Divine propaganda
He'll tell you himself he's gonna do it.

>partying all day
Wrong Daedric Prince

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>tfw my RS Children boys use my player home's bath and strip naked so I can jerk it to them every morning

really should invest in mods that give them cocks

That's what I don't get. They made her dialogue have constant sexual innuendo, she won't leave you alone or get too far away and her questline leads to her becoming human for you, but you can't marry her.

to be fair, there is a decent chance he date raped the dragonborn

I prefer the one with only one pauldron

I always wondered what the fuck my companion was doing during that quest.
Doubly so because she was also my wife.

based

>that framerate
lmao

hi quikkdraw

thanks Todd

R E K T

Isn't that ilegal?

Not gonna defend 'it just works' or the frothing autist, but wasn't it said that since she's a super speshul >rape victim vamp she can't be harmed by conventional means? It still doesn't excuse not immediately taking the scroll and taking it back to your hunterbros instead of taking it to the one person who can fuck shit up with it though.

That's not said until later, and even then they're just super tough. It's not Witcher 3 rules.

There's a chance the dragonborn fucked a goat and a hagraven, if you think about it.

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Dawnguard only exists as a DLC because Valerica just happened to give birth to a girl. Had Serana been a male there would have been zero justification for not killing him and taking his Elder Scroll. The only reason why people didn't question the fact that you can't kill her was because of "muh cute Vampire grill :3"

>That's not said until later
Fugg you're right, I was remembering the boss fight at the end where you have to use those shit arrows to hurt Hurrkon during a few phases. What a shitshow, fuck Todd, and fuck vampires

The better question is... how she manages to speak the same language of everybody else after more then a millenia in the fridge?

and how has she not suffered any form of muscular atrophy after being in the same position for that long? Reminds me of Kid in a Fridge from Fallout 4.

>There's a chance the dragonborn fucked a goat
nah, you just trade it to a giant, for mammoth cheese i'm assuming

It's not easy living with the soul of a dragon, but being too small to fuck your own race. Sanguine just gave you alcohol so you could go wild on appropriately sized creatures that might look somewhat like dragons if you are really drunk and squint.

That part can easily be explained by magic, which is an understandable part of a high fantasy series. She's literally the living dead.
Fuck Kid in a Fridge forever.

serana is an asshole or havent you noticed? trash ass companion

because literally, unironically, empirically, objectively she's todd's waifu

But I wanna fuck a hot vampire lady

>see that vampire?
>you can't kill that.

Yeah, no. That;s complete nonsense. Nowhere in TES lore does it say that muscles don't work like normal. Had she used a healing spell or something after being woken up it would be defensible.

Mr. Howard has a good taste.

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shes a vampire princess who despite living for 100s if not a thousand years hasnt grown out of her angsty emo phase. of course shes shit

just remember user, choices matter ;) thats why you dont get any to make

>i'll just spout things i know aren't true for yous
To what end? Until your bored or are there a certain number of yous that you're fighting for?

you can turn companions into vamps

Yeah no, this shit would be infuriatingly stupid in a movie, let alone in a role playing game where you're supposed to be able to choose your path.

Not being able to attack the vampires in the castle gets a pass because you'd get slaughtered, but a vampire hunter willing to help a vampire he just met bring a FUCKING ELDER SCROLL back to her entourage of vampires is so absolutely retarded no amount of suspension of disbelief saves it.

what

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elderscrolls.fandom.com/wiki/The_Gift

She's been RUINED by Morag Bol man.

>elderscrolls.fandom.com/wiki/The_Gift
Well, fuck. I sided with the dawnguard on my playthrough

It doesn't work on the best waifus anyway.

>if your character is a high level half-god that just came back from fucking another millenia old dragonborn in the ass

The Thieves' Guild questline has this problem as well
>Mercer Frey has 1 daedric artifact
>The Dovahkiin has 15
>"nooo listen you don't stand a chance against him you need to go sell your soul to Nocturnal first"

pretty lame that bethesda gives you access to a vampire girl who toys with you the entire game, when theres a real solution to the problem hidden away in that castle.

The thieves guild had a fucking laundry list of problems. Legit the single worst questline in the game along with that other murder shit in windhelm.

I'm trying to understand the lore a bit more but it makes my brain hurt.
So all the different races mostly worship the same 8 divines but call them different names and describe them differently right?
But if the description of them is different for each race what is the true way to worship them as they actually exist?
I feel like the imperial way is the correct interpretation of them.

namely 4 npcs in the guild having mercers voice lmao but also you cant marry the cutest girl in the game Karliah.

there's a lot of overlap, yes

Don't forget that from the other point of view. If you want to join the dlc vampires and be some evil nutcase, you literally have to join the vampire hunters first.

The whole dlc is just ass and exists purely because some programmer wanted to spank his wank to Serana.

like half the NPCs in the entire game have mercer's voice
as per usual they blew their budget on paarthurnax and hired their 3 janitors to voice the rest of the characters

She does, Basically she days that marriage through that religion doesnt suit her, and she feels better when you both together Just like that
Basically shes with you, but doesnt want to marry through the usual ways

Serana is one of the most transparent mary sues in a long time. Like she is literally an oldschool shitty internet fanfiction tier character

>super duper ancient vampire
>so powarful
>b-but she's good at heart
>her daddy mean to her boohoo she needs a big strong PC to help her
>but she's also super powered and smug about it
>she can march into the silly vampire hunters headquarters and tell them what to do
>endlessly whines at you

Oblivion and Skyrim are like that. You can't kill anyone and pretty much every door is locked. That's why Morrowind is much better.

>Why won't this bitch marry me
Molag's cold sloppy seconds that has been pounded by literally thousands of dicks because she's centuries years old

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>hear about the big family feud in Whiterun
>the patriarchs of both families are the same guy

In other words she's so mary sue she's 'too sophistimacted for such tiresome traditions'.

God this character just reeks of pretension.

Or maybe she's trying to save you from Molag rape

Nah I'm pretty sure it's just shitty writing.

Molag gave me his mace thing not even 10 minutes ago.

so he could rape you with it

When you sell your soul to 15 daedra prince you might as well finish the set.

I'M GONNA MARRY THAT WHORE

>posting Serana without Seranaholic installed

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fuck off todd you faggot

when the dragonborn dies it's going to be a fucking party in oblivion

yes but she has a large rack so its ok

Coz Todd was too fucking lazy and unimaginative to add it in. Why are Valve so shit at end game quests..

When you finished Dawnguard, just nothing.. So pointless.

>when the dragonborn dies it's going to be a fucking party in oblivion
No it won't. The soul will go back to Akatosh

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Too bad HM is trying to rig the game, he is ruining the fun.

Mora was terrified of the Dragonborn

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Akatosh doesn't give a fuck about dragon souls, that's why Alduin can rez them so easily. Because their souls remain stuck to the corpse and go nowhere.

What is Seranaholic
I'm...I'm playing it on PS4

Which version do you like user? 1.5 was my favorite.

She's cute.

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>Akatosh doesn't give a fuck about dragon souls, that's why Alduin can rez them so easily.
Akatosh is scattered brained God that began to question its existence and sent itself to kill itself.

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How is Mora BTFO when as convoluted as it was, Miraak's plan got completely BTFO'd?

It proved that Deadra aren't as powerful as most believe them to be. The fact that Miraak could hide his plans from Mora and Skall chief could also hide info from him just adds more evidence that Daedric Princes have weaknesses

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this but unironically

>want to play Skyrim
>have to update all my mods

Being an SEfag is suffering

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Just buy oldrim dumbo

im one of the dumbasses who likes fo4 settlements and wants then in skyrim so im sol too

>Being an SEfag is suffering
just roll back your updates fag

>who likes fo4 settlements
do u

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Jesus user why

Mora knew about Miraak's betrayal, which is why the Dragonborn got brought into the picture. He got a fix and a replacement in one move. The simple fact that Miraak's opportunity to get his plan moving coincided with the Dragonborn's appearance also supports Mora knowing, it would be too much of an unfortunate coincidence otherwise.

The Skall chief is also a question of convenience. It's par for the course that the Daedric Princes use mortal proxies to get shit done, and there is not much reason to believe that this situation was any different. The chief had knowledge Mora wanted, and he could get it in a way that forced the Dragonborn to willingly commit something morally really fucking dubious. It was a lesson, same way Miraak's execution was a lesson.

That's not to say Deadric Princes have no weaknesses or that they are infallible, but I don't see these as examples of them.

nexusmods.com/skyrim/mods/38326

>first time doing a playthrough with DLCs
>decide to be an absolute KKK level vampire hater during the dawnguard DLC
>forced to do everything in the questline with a vampire bitch friend
>decide if this bitch doesn't turn into a normal human after the questline I'll kill her
>turns out she wont because this is the one singular instance in this shit game where previous dialouge impacts outcomes in the far future
>basically had to watch out not to hurt her feelings all the way through to get it

Seething at this point

>try to kill the bitch
>she can't die

Fuck you Bethesda.

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is there a mod where i can lick her feet?

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doesn't even look like the same person
just a samefaced animu

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shut up you faggot nigger
she is great

Vampires are virgin cowards who fear death, werewolves are chads who embrace violence and the hunt. This is non debatable.

I don't know which one did it, but now there's a mod that makes all the girls curvier and nude under their armor.

I'm not complaining, I just want to know if it might have been one of those mods that revised shit like vampires or perks.

She has a manface without it.

no she hadn't you faggot
was rape and theres likely magic to get a new body or undo it

Yeah she's garbage and lacking any sort of meaningful depth just like every other character in Skyrim and Oblivion

Her entire mortal understanding of affection and relationships was just too fucked up by Molag Bal and her parents' antics. I bet even imagining the last dragonborn's rod would send her into a traumatic fit. There's always mods.

>not liking strong jaws on women
low test

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weak

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See, a better game would let you do any of those and you'd simply have to deal with the consequences.

The first would probably lead to Harkon not even being a threat, the second wouldn't be a problem if you aren't a weak bitch, and the third should have been what was in the game.

I never understood why people take companions and mod the shit out of them with big tits and stuff, I just go solo and suck up all the experience. Only time I have anything with me is when I'm running a necro or summoner.

>Why won't this bitch marry me
This
She won't marry you OP because what molag bal does to turn people into vampires is in the same vein as Casca's experience with Femto during the Eclipse. Only arguably more bloody and deprived.

She's not insane at least, but she makes the regular rape victim look privileged by comparison.

Why won't this tsundere marry me?

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Yeah Dawnguard's main plot is extremely contrived.

what's this armor from?

She looks like she's in dire need of some lotion

>she has a manface

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>no she hadn't you faggot
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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>die as a werewolf
>get to spend the rest of the kalpa going on awesome hunts involving Hircine's greatest beasts

Hircine's afterlife sounds awesome; dunno why Kodlak wanted to get out of it.

What a good fellow, probably has hundreds of pocket realms made just for my own degenerative machinations.

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because he's a norduck and wanted to chill with his ancestors and shit

Spending eternity being someone's bitch isn't what I'd call awesome. But if you're going to do it, at least spend it with Nocturnal, she has nice tits.

Don't forget when you get back to the head vampire hunter he chews you out for doing the shit you were forced to by the game.

>run around a field chasing animals for eternity
>or chill in a giant mead hall doing nothing but eating meat and getting drunk with the heroes of legend

Just wait until Hircine shows you his tomboy female form. There's a reason he doesn't appear that way to most mortals, it'd just be cheating and not much of a hunt for souls at all.

I'm not American, bud. Eating and drinking beer all day for all eternity is not my idea of a good afterlife.

rent free

I mean if you call hunting the strongest beasts created by the god of the hunt being someone else's bitch then I guess yeah.
You're pretty much shaping the course of evolution by showing a god of hunting what works and what doesn't in an animal.
Also fuck I forgot Hircine is a cute twink fuck yeah slamming boi pucci as a werewolf sounds rad as hell.

for special edition, what are some good mods for serena?

Bijin

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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

00f

i never used them in es games before recently. decided to try some out and its convenient in games where every stupid creature charges at you the moment they detect you. now i like not having to deal with small stuff like that so i just let them do it instead. its even more handy in morrowind

She looked great before. What's Korea obsession with wanting to look like a child forever?

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just use a mod. I married a flame atronach. had to invest in alchemy for those fire resistance potions.

>8 divines

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Justinrpg pls leave

youtube.com/watch?v=A-chDClmdos&list=PL7pGJQV-jlzCPBUy9uAXQUXZ4UBaDLKS5

Very cool!

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Talos is not a god

>So all the different races mostly worship the same 8 divines
Eh, that's the most consistently portrayed in the games themselves, but the lore is much more of a mess. For one thing the 'Imperial way' of worship is a bastardised mix of the faith of former Aylied slaves who have adapted their elven masters' religion (plus those Aylied who joined up willingly) and the Nords whose alliance helped St Alessia to victory. It's a thing of political convenience, not one of real relevation or faith. Plus although we don't really see it, there are supposed to be a myriad little cults, sects and mini-religions all bickering amongst themselves, and each Divine ought to have a bit more of a faith unto just that particular one, whilst acknowledging the others. In Oblivion this was shoved into a Cathedral being dedicated to one Divine or another, but little more. Then besides them you have a fairly regular general tendency for ancestor worship, straight-up Daedric cults as well as the weird shit the Dunmer had going with the Good Daedra / House of Troubles pantheon before switching to worshipping three treasonous assholes. Also the Hist. And whatever the fuck the Sload believe in is likely far from most other faiths, never mind the beliefs of the Akaviri.

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this video is satire, right?

murder yourself thalmor whore

>wanting to marry someone who willingly let molag bal ravage them
>willingly
Didn't her father literally force her and her mother to get fucked by molag bal? Did you forget that molag bal is the king of rape.

Because she knows she is ugly

>but being too small to fuck your own race
All dragons are male though. Unless the female ones just sound like males too

Elf fucker

No. I hate Apachi hair it looks retarded.

Jilians, my boy. Or just regular dragons if female Dragonborn.

>willingly
>daedric prince of domination, the king of rape
choose one

>weird shit the Dunmer had going with the Good Daedra / House of Troubles pantheon before switching to worshipping three treasonous assholes
The Reclamations fixed that, fuck those false gods.

I think the actual reason people want to Marry Serana is that she's the only NPC in the entire game with some semblance of a personality. She was a proto follower before Fallout 4 implemented that new system there. Still fucking retarded that you can't get with her or the Nordic woman of divine thicness

You've probably got a small dick

>That's why Morrowind is much better.
youtube.com/watch?v=bNXYrAkUntU
despite the funny story morrowind sucks major balls

>enemy can actually block
>you still have a hit chance
Was it just for shits and giggles, or were they not confident enough to make that block decent and add parry?

OH
DRINK WATER
DRINK WATER
DRINK WATER
BITCH!

'luv me sun
'ate vampires

simple as.