Help me fucking rationalize this, because I literally can't imagine it.
No one in modern Mario speaks in coherent sentences. Even the characters that do have it done through text.
I can't imagine this is just going to be Mario bing bing wahooing for two fucking hours, it feels so surreal.
Mario Movie 2022
Kayden Nguyen
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Michael Gutierrez
Here's the leaked trailer summary for it, OP:
>this summer...
>everyone's favorite plumber...
>is coming to the big screen
>cuts to bowser voiced by Adam Sandler What a bummer!
>Ke$ha starts playing WAKE UP IN THE MORNING FEELING LIKE IM P DIDDY
>Mario wakes up giddy for the morning as Peach is carried away in the distance, his alarm is still going off and he can't hear her, scrolls through some messages, looks up as he's about to read "princess peach kidnapped" remember to take up luigi, who's alarm is the local radio
>"in other news, princess peach has been-"
>Mario, voiced by Aziz Ansari "It's a me! Your brother, Mario! We need to get an early start on our day if we're going to get anything done!"
>Luigi, voiced by Owen Wilson, "just go on without me, man"
>Mario: "but together we are the super Mario brothers! Without you I'm just... Regular Mario Brother."
>two brothers will find themselves
>Mario "what?! Peach is missing?"
>Luigi "really?"
>and maybe Peach
>Mario "and bowser took her?"
>Luigi "wow REALLY?"
>but first they have to find Bowser
>bowser: "I know what girls like!"
>presents a bundle of fire flowers to Peach* "fire flower?"
>Peach kicks him in the balls
>"AAAAA My fire balls!"
>who might need to be saved from peach
>peach, voiced by who do you fucking think, it's Kristen Schaal "I keep inviting you to go kart riding, to play golf, to parties, and even to the Olympic Games AND THIS IS HOW YOU TREAT ME?!"
>this summer is going to be
>montage of slap stick
>bowser twerking
>Mario "aaawkward"
>this summer is going to be...
>montage that's pretty much the inevitable dance party ending
>toad doing a head spin
>"LIIIIIIIIT"
>this summer is going to be!
>*montage of every time they say "super" in the movie
>SUPER
>Super Mario Bros.
Grayson Allen
Well there was a terrible Mario movie from the 90s where they spoke.
But since this is animated it'll probably be different.
Jonathan Robinson
As long as I get some of that sweet Peach and Daisy content.
Jonathan Bennett
MAMA MIA
YAHOOOOOOOOO
BING BING
Zachary Kelly
Mario has spoken in coherent sentences before.
Camden Richardson
>Thank you so much for a-playing my game!
Daniel Stewart
Also "it's-a me, Mario!"
You know, the most famous thing he says?
Dominic Young
Post-credits scene is a teaser to the Kirby movie.
Camden Williams
>Mario, I'll like to talk to you about the Smash bros initiative
Kayden Martin
there was a cartoon in the 90's where they spoke more normally.
Chase Thomas
This is good news. Yea Forums has already found our guy for Mario.
Isaac Thomas
>No one in modern mario speaks in coherent sentences
They do when Charles Marinet feels like shitposting during his vacations and trips.
Alexander Collins
Neither does the Minions, and Illumination is doing it
Cameron Barnes
Ya know, despite all the media they've fucked up in past decade, I think a mario movie made by illumination wouldn't be complete trash fire.
Minions are marketed to be the most annoying fucking thing on the planet, but idiot boomer moms are the ones responsible for feeding it's popularity. Mario on the other hand is already a given, and not even a far fetch'd one considering they just collaborated with the video game equivalent of minions.
But illumination animations are pretty good all things considered, they have a certain bounciness and comedic timing I think can work well with the mario world. At worst it's inoffesively mediocre
Austin Reed
He sounds fine if Martinet can tone down the pitch.
Asher Flores
I could watch this for 3 hours
Andrew Morgan
That is if they hire Martinet instead of some C-list hollywood hack.
Christopher Powell
Mario and Luigi (John C. Reily and Will Ferrell) are a couple of low time plumbers with an iq of 48, Mario has a girlfriend, Peach (who unbeknownst to Mario,is actually a hooker and a drunk played by Kathryn Hahn, trying to seduce both brothers to squeeze money out of the two).
One day Mario and Luigi won 100 million from the lottery, so Peach, being the whore that she is, decided to tell her pimp, Bowser (Craig Robinson) and they hatch a plan to leech it off the two plumbers. by pretending that Peach is kidnapped by Bowser.
Meanwhile Mario and Luigi's cousins, Wario (Danny Mcbride) and Waluigi (James franco) hears about their winnings and plan to take it all for themselves, Wario gets himself some mushrooms from his local dealer, 'Toad' (Adam Scott) and laces their spaghetti with the mushrooms, They all start to trip where all they could see in Mario Land where everything is cgi, Mario and Luigi panics and tries to save Peach from Bowser, stopping the whole Drug Cartel and Bowser's child slavery ring in the process
Seth Rogen plays a DEA agent
Terry Crews as Donkey Kong, a rival drug kingpin
Rob Cordry as Bowser Jr
John Lithgow as Bullet 1
Liam Neeson as Bullet 2
Directed by Adam Mckay
Christopher Jones
Who the fuck is even the target market for this shit?
How do these pitches even get past the idea room without getting laughed at for the next half hour? What fucking data manipulation do these marketers pull to show directors that there's interest in this garbage? Nobody wants it.
Jose Reyes
Don't forget about "Oh yeah! Mario time!" and the classic, "So long, gay bowser!"
Ayden Ward
Its so fucking cringy, I believe it.
Jordan White
You're talking as if Mario's an obscure nobody.
Jackson Morgan
You overestimate studio execs. Remember those leaked Sony emails discussing their plans for Spider-Man?
Ryan Gonzalez
He isn't, but that doesn't mean audiences want a Mario movie. Sonic isn't a nobody and look at how that shit's turning out.
Luis Gray
>I'm putting together a team...
Blake Baker
I could fucking see this, too. Jesus christ.
Oliver Moore
Asher Gomez
I really hope they make charles tone down his voice acting. Best case senario they dont even use him.
Camden Smith
>Mario is literally one of most popular franchises in the world next to Tetris and Pokemon.
>What is the market for this?
Nigga really? Also are you forgettgin that Mario also got a cartoon and manga?
Oliver Edwards
>"AAAAA My fire balls!"
I heard this in Martinet's 64 voice
Daniel White
Someone needs to dub over this movie with the Super Show voices.
Angel Cruz
all the characters talk but Mario that speaks in yahoo bing bing like the Minions
Ryan Rivera
I remember that thread.
Crazy shit.
Liam Robinson
same post evertime
Jackson Roberts
Martinet is good when he isn't in total BING BING WAHOO mode. Chances are Mario will just be semi-mute, though.
Luis Turner
>Ke$ha starts playing WAKE UP IN THE MORNING FEELING LIKE IM P DIDDY
This should be updated with a Cardi B song.
Christian Young
If they give him the gruff voice from the cartoons it would sound natural. If they give him the game voice, it will be so cringey and awkward in full sentences. I honestly don't know what they'll do.
Anthony Murphy
This gets posted in every single one of these threads and I never get tired of it
Christopher Edwards
>No one in modern Mario speaks in coherent sentences...
Mario youtu.be
Luigi youtu.be
Wario youtu.be
Gabriel Rivera
I'd watch it.
Joshua Price
they should have started with Wario honestly, with Danny Devito
Mason Morris
lol good shit
James Lopez
The movie will be about Mario getting kidnapped and everyone else trying to rescue him. Mark my words.
Ayden Foster
Levi Murphy
>Mario completely absent for 3/4ths of the movie
That would be incredibly stupid so they'll probably do it.
Luis Reed
Can’t wait for Bowser to say “let’s make the mushroom kingdom great again”
Landon Martin
charles must have got a fat check from this
Tyler Evans
Soul.
Adrian Gonzalez
>no one's posted it yet
embarrasing
Evan Brown
WarioWare Gold has full voice acting.
William Ross
Considering that he either make new clips or get the voice reused literally every game since 1996.
Yep.
Gavin Scott
Imagine if the characters in the movie had their personalities from Mario Strikers.
youtube.com
youtube.com
Kayden Taylor
He also speaks full sentences in Sunshine but they're inaudible
Cameron Wright
Nintendo allowed this?
Nathan Bell
I hate this because I know theres a chance it will be what actually happens.
Benjamin Barnes
There is no upcoming mario movie
Carson Sullivan
Nintendo setup some booths like that once a while.
Jaxson Cook
Here is my rating on Illumation's films from good to shit
>Despicable Me
>Despicable Me 2
>Despicable Me 3
>Dr. Seuss' The Lorax
>Dr. Seuss' The Grinch
>Minions
>The Secret Life of Pets
>Sing
>Hop
Fucking Despicable Me 1-3 are just the only best films, I'm hoping that Untitled Pharrell Williams film and the rest of the Untitled films (other than the Mario Movie) would be better than the films and the upcoming sequels that illumination had released already.
Bentley Hill
Charles Martinet has spoken in a coherent sentence as Mario, Luigi and Wario before so it doesn't sound like a problem.