Meanwhile, on the USG Yea Forumsshimura

its just the vent engineers. don't worry about it

Someone tell him to fuck off with the autistic screeching, can't do my job right here at the medbay with all that noise.

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They must be in there all the time. I haven't seen Larry all week.

HEY JANNIES, GUESS WHAT?
I JUST TOOK A FAT DUMP ON THE MAIN DECK! COME CLEAN IT UP!
HAHAHAHAHHAHAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
>*thump*
who's there?

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>he wasn't invited
loving every laugh

Ain't the janny for sure, he's been stuck with trying to open the door of his closet ever since I stole his power node.

W... What? There's a party in the vents? LARRY!

*THUMP* *THUMP* *THUMP* *THUMP* *THUMP* *THUMP*

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Omg such file name.

>thwamp
...wtf was that?

Who in the FUCK stopped the toilets again? what in the FUCK is this shit I have to deal with every single week because one MOTHERFUCKER CAN'T SHIT RIGHT

I SAID don't worry about it. Now go back to your quarters, leave the door unlocked, and leave all of your vents unobstructed.

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Unitology prayer rescheduled to 11:30am by Capt. Mathius.

Alright alright. ... This is so going in my video log...

Hey guys check this shit out, if you engage your magboots while stomping you can smash anything, anyone wanna grab some melons from the food storage and have some fun?

I'm sorry... I'm so sorry.

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Have you heard? Something happened in the Cryogenics Laboratory yesterday.

>something happened
yeah no shit sherlock, WHAT HAPPENED is what nobody knows at the moment. Unless I'm out of the loop.

>pomf
oh what the fuck?

Why did we invite an IRANIAN doctor? He keeps offering me checkups in his "office".

Sorry fer whut?
Our daddy taught us not to be ashamed of our Markers

Holy fuck sometimes it feels like this is the oldest ship still in service. Also the ship newsletter always talks about the areas the vent engineers are working on, but I've never met any of them.

Can you faggots keep it down in the vents?

Alright. I'm ok with people bringing their pets onboard but who brought a FUCKING GORILLA into hydroponics? I'm serious you guys,I'm NOT cleaning up the poos.

Don't you get tired of making the same fucking threads OVER and OVER again?

Ha, ha. Real fucking funny, you condoms. Stop rewiring the doors when you KNOW we don't have Stasis stations out here.

Why do I keep hewaring this Atomic Kitten song all the time? Can somebody change the Yea Forumsshimura's radio station?

Why is there hardly any lighting on this fucking ship? A fuckhuge space will get maybe 2 lightbulbs, and be darker than my asshole. Can we get some fucking lights, shit is depressing.

>tfw no more Isaac and Ellie

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Fuck this, I'm putting in for a transfer to the Event Horizon

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"no"

I HATE THESE UNITOLOGY FUCKERS.

There. I said it. Every couple of days or so these absolute degenerates set some sort of ritual up in the ship. There's blood and candles everywhere! I'm the one that has to clean this shit up everytime! I'm sick of it!

We put in an order for a shipment of lightbulbs. That was like 14 months ago. We ask what the fuck's going on, but these Unit*logy fucks won't let us near the comms.

Sup loser
How’s that 3 save run going for you?

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Each of these encounters is super easy though
The one in the church is the toughest but you just get up against the door and funnel them to you, javelin gun eats them for breakfast
The other two can be cheesed super easily since their AI won't let them go through the door to the stairs

*REEEEEEEEEEEEs in the distance*
youtube.com/watch?v=YuOBGnwtxxQ

OH SWEET FUCK
WHATS GOING ON IN THE DINING AREA!

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Why did people say they acted intelligently? Last time I played the all ran at me if I just waited a little while, allowing me to pick them off from a safe position.

Any of you white bois wanna see me in Z-ball?
Yeah, I knew you wouldn't. Bitch ass crackers.

>ruins your game

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Those niggers are much worse.

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What was better? The Ishimura?
Or Titan Station?

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Why do we keep babies in fish tanks?
Why am I only learning this now after already signing the 3 year contract?

The first time I saw one in DS2 it scared the absolute shit out of me because they were pussy bitches in 1

I love both games but I like the full ishimura a bit better.

Ishimura because of how confined the space was. Titan because of these fucks.

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Is dead space 3 worth 10 dollars used for my old ass 360?

Now thats just rude. You won't believe me anyway but Capt. Mathius was at prayer for 5min last Tuesday

I brought enough candles for everybody. And for the last time.
we're.
not.
doing.
lightbulbs.

What the fuck happened between DS1 and DS2? Why did they get so powerful?

>moving the marker in 1
>hacking the doors at the end of 2

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So do all kid necros attack in packs? Why are they do only necros who learned to do that?

I mean I guess
Personally I don't want to give those fuckers any money but if it's used then it's not going to them so whatever

Those engineers are almost as retarded as you, Unitard. Do you REALLY think these dim ass candles are safe for them to work under?

What do you think he was like?

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>pack of these fuckers runs towards me in a confined space
>fire one javelin into the ground and electrify it and enjoy dozens of child corpses and free items

i hate those unitology niggers

Is this original Dead Space worth playing?

How about any of the sequels?

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original- yes
2 maybe
3 fuck no

Got so bad at I had to stop fighting the fuckers and just run during the end. First time dead space actually felt like a horror game.

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DS1 and DS2 is great. I would only play DS3 if you can get it cheap and used.

i told capitan that we shouldn't allow niggers to serve on this ship

1 is overated but good, 2 is ok too. 3 is literally a beta version with DLC's that somewhat resembles a game.

>1
Hell yes. Great atmosphere and gameplay. Top tier spooky.
>2
Hell yes. Less spooky but improved gameplay. Imagine Aliens to Alien.
>3
Haven't played it. Most people are disappointed with.

At least these variant do. Somehow the Hivemind realizes that the kid necros are more fragile and their skeletal system isn't that great so in order to counteract this it makes them work together to down prey.

Not even kicking when I say 1 and 2 are the greatest games of all time
But I am a horror and sci-fi buff so I am biased

He was probably a chill dude who got set up as a EarthGov patsy.

Seen any good stuff recently user? I'm always on the hunt for stuff to watch.

DS3 is a whole helluvalot longer game than the other 2.
Run it on PC if you can. I ran DS 3 with a Q9550 and a GTX 260 in 2015 (thats 2008 hardware you can get for pennies)

I read the book and he's just some putz that was in the wrong place at the wrong time. He was 'immune' to most of the effects of the Marker that his team found and he wanted to sabotage the Marker. Unfortunately he was killed by people to set him up as this great founder even though he had wanted no part in it, ironically.

If you like found footage at all I highly recommend a movie called the Savage lands
Really god damn spooky and never riles in jump scares or stupid overdone bullshit

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There is nothing scary about the 3rd one. It went full-on over-the-shoulder shooter but has a really fun weapon customization system.
You can change your weapons at anytime in the game to try out different ways of killing shit.

The series' leap is not unlike Resident Evils' leap from survival horror to RE4 arcade shooter. It succeeds at what it changed to. IMO still a really fun game

Why was the marker a good guy in 1?

Yo my blond qt3.14 roommate keeps making video messages to her chad jewish boyfriend on the other side of the galaxy how can i ask her to be quit without having the tought police on my back for misogyny

The Marker is glorious and divine, you - you know that.

That was man made

But in 2 it was cray bitch evilevil.

>There is nothing scary about the 3rd one
I disagree on that, since it launched the setting into full on cosmic horror.
> I remember telling my college professor I wanted to study xenoarcheology. He laughed right in my face. 'There’s nothing to study,' he said. 'It’s all dead space. No alien life exists out in the universe.' In a way, I guess he was right. There is no life beyond our system, only a trail of extinction, brought by the Moons. And now it’s right on our doorstep.
Sends shivers up my spine.

My stance on 3 is that what it did for the setting was great, but the game itself is bunk for horror.

Thanks, I'll watch it right now. I'm impartial to found footage myself. In exchange I'll recommend Black Mountain Side, and The Objective.

I pirated DS3 recently. It was really miserable experience. Necromorphs rush at you at light speed and dont flinch when you shoot them. Stasis has been nerfed again. This makes dodging attacks very hard thats why game throws medkits at you. You will be drowning in them even on hardest difficulty. Ammo is universal and almost infinite. I ended game with 1000 bullets and i had materials to craft more. Some missions are locked in
single player.

Real talk: Does anyone think that the Brother Moons were just an evolutionary stage for some highly advanced aliens who believed that they owned the universe and decided to use other planets and force evolution on their lifeforms like if they were cattle?

Anyone wanna buy a power node?

Thank you for the suggestion =D !

Wort, Wort, Wort

Ree
t.Ree

I fucking love dead space
I've been considering getting a marker tattoo on my forearm
I don't really like tattoos but I could see that being really cool and it's the only thing I'd really want to have on my body permanently
Yea or nay, Yea Forumsshimura?

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Do it and post it here so we can laugh at you.

>tattoo
>video game tattoo
what an absolute faggot

Only if you get it done on your benis.

Just get a tattoo of a dick on your arm and you'd look like less of a faggot

I saw a vidya tattoo in real life once. It was the gears of war gear&skull on a gamestop employee.

Who the FUCK writes this gibberish on the walls?

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If I join my local unitology church will they give me a necromorph gf?

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Can someone please post all of the little comics?

no, its trash.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHRRRROOOHHHHHHHHHUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHNNN

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