"Google, open Stadia"

All I want is a Ctrl+F for real life so I could find keywords in books.

That isn't even the worst problem with streaming games. If you have shitty internet like I do & you are playing an RPG the game will just cut off and all progress will be deleted.
>BLACKED

voice activation is so dystopic, how fucking fat do you have to be to not want to move your arms over awkwardly shouting what you want the thing to do

I've got a google home and not being able to call it a name is fucking infuriating. Hey google hey google hey google ok google ok google ok google just gets really fucking old and long-winded

"Google, contact my bull and begin the prepping process."
>TYRONE CONTACTED AND PREPPED, XIR
"Google, how many more good husband points do I need?"
>TWO AWAY FROM YOUR GOAL, XIR
"Google, scan twitter for any responses to my tweets."
>YOU HAVE NONE, XIR
>"Google, while you're there scan twitter for tweets that say something stupid or controversial then screencap them and upload them to Yea Forums."
>UPLOADED, YOU HAVE A HUNDRED REPLIES ALREADY, XIR
>"Google open my e-celeb friendlist."
>ERROR, THEY ARE NOT ACTUALLY YOUR FRIENDS, XIR

I like mine, I play relaxing noises to help me sleep

Your progress won't be deleted because the game isn't running on your computer. Presumably it would keep running on some server waiting for inputs. Meanwhile software at another layer would be waiting for you to reconnect to resume passing your inputs to the game and passing the game's video to your computer. Imagine your friend is playing a game but he only does the inputs you tell him to over the phone. If the call drops, the game is still running but there are no inputs being made. You can call him back and resume playing. Of course, at some point they have to shut it off because otherwise you're wasting their server capacity, but hopefully they're smart enough to give you a grace period to reconnect.

The worst problem is still input lag. RPGs would therefore be among the more playable genres (true turn-based of course, not ARPGs).

Yes but imagine being able to call it Jarvis or something.

Remember when pic related was just an exaggeration of how bad shit has gotten?

Attached: comic.png (1200x1025, 214K)

Bruh, look at this dude

basado

Stadia isnt a console its a streaming service for anything with google chrome,Its another way for exclusivity’s to take over the pc gaming markey by having it fight epic and steam
It might try to force itself as a downloadable service for other consoles like switch and xbox

>Google, call my opponent a faggot
>breach of ToS detected. shutting down

E-books.

I just don't get it, someone is clearly responsable for pushing this current of meme making, but who?

FIND ME A JOB

Attached: xbox-aaron-paul.jpg (1024x768, 112K)

"Google. I love cuckolding, and love it when my wife's boyfriend lets me have turn with her."
>YOUR ACCOUNT HAS BEEN UNBANNED AND 50 DOLLARS HAS BEEN DEPOSITED INTO YOUR BALANCE
Checkmate Google.

I legitimately forgot stadia was a thing until this thread popped up.

Also realistically if this was a thing wouldn't that mean you'd have to game with one eye only?

the comic on the right is much funnier though

Left has more effort.

I can't believe it's been years since this joke was made.

I'm beginning to believe people actually find this funny. Went over to twitch to take a look at what the hubbub was about and the chats were infested with frogs. Just a new generation of underage suburban frogfuckers.

“Google, open Stadia”
>STADIA INITIATED
“Google, send invites to recently added Chinese friends”
>SEARCH IN PROGRESS
>25 PLAYERS DETECTED
“Google, send all Chinese friends invites for a match”
>MESSAGE SENT
>25 USERS HAVE JOINED THE LOBBY
>Google, search 1989 Tiananmen Square massacre
>SEARCHING
>RESULTS FOUND
>25 PLAYERS HAVE LEFT THE LOBBY

Why is it always 25 users?
Am i missing a joke here?

Attached: 1534467540385.png (105x143, 20K)

i like alexa being able to be called computer, but id love for user settings

"Google, open Hollow Knight"
>GAME LICENSE EXPIRED, PLEASE PAY $4.99 TO REACTIVATE
"Google, use my credit card."
>LICENSE PURCHASED!
"Google, open Hollow Knight"
>CONNECTION ERROR

Attached: 1496020984844.jpg (308x403, 49K)

Very nice

Attached: 1545854493023.gif (540x304, 1.86M)

ok, and?

>TFW when this jive turkey thinks he can beat the best console.

Attached: Wojack Atari 3.png (836x909, 171K)

>dead, but also in denial

With the Intellivision Amico on the horizon, we need a Wojack to accompany that. Suggestions?

vocaroo.com/i/s19jyhlpXzfs

Based Atari bro

Attached: atari chads.png (1152x648, 407K)

“GOOGLE OPEN STADIA”
>DO NOT YELL AT ME, I AM TRYING MY HARDEST

Shes gonna get in trouble laughing like that in class

get into the groove bro

Attached: e4803f5b0bb11ba1173615c234c86587d698e64d12cc9597841fd6688862971b.png (720x852, 292K)

Attached: c28.png (680x593, 478K)

>"Google, open Stadia"
STADIA INITIATED
>"Google, search into my contacts for users online"
Oops, something happened.
>"Google, send all online contacts an invite for a match"
Oops, something happened.
>"Google, open RE:MW"
Oops, something happened.

Attached: 3B7210D3-C255-4749-BAEC-4157A025D1DC.jpg (1460x1466, 533K)

someone post the xbox verification thread where you have to drink a mountain dew to play

>in the desert after burying your games

just visiting the funeral of the competition

Attached: 1497759435422.gif (1000x714, 1.97M)

t. Brainlet

FUCK

Attached: 27751550_1994917724056462_728764066820711884_n.jpg (720x756, 56K)

Google, show me pictures of healthy video game women
>Ok
What? These women are thin as rails! Google, show me pictures of thick video game women
>Ok
These women are just average! Google, show me pictures of plump video game women
>Ok
Alright, still a bit small, but we're getting somewhere. Google, show me video game BBWs
>Ok
Alright Google, save 100 pictures in the results, following the Fibonacci sequence starting at the second number
>Ok. Downloading image 1. Downloading image 2. Downloading image 3. Downloading image 5. Downloading image 8.
>...
>All downloads complete
Google, open 4channel and navigate to slash vee slash
>Opening... done
Google, find a thread where the OP image matches this subject: "Wojak"
>Found one
Google, open that thread
>Ok
Google...
>yes?
Dump all images

>Google, inform my wife I'll be in the cuck shed playing Fortnite
>Done, would you like to send a message to Jamal for him to come over?
>Do I even need to say it Google? Haha

GOOGLE NO

Attached: E2FCC49D9ECF4971A99664576AE921E1.png (1085x1080, 816K)

>Google, predict my inputs to counteract Stadia's lag

>"Ok"
>Loses anyway because you're a fucking scrub

kek

lol he's doing voice sql queries

BITCH

Google, search for video games by name
>Please state the name you want to search
Open quote. Semicolon. Drop table asterisk. Semicolon. Hyphen. Hyphen.
>Ok. You have searched '"; DROP TABLE *; --'
>Stadia offline

That's not stadia, that's the google glasses that were quite the meme when they were announced, pretty sure they were abandoned.

Was google glass ever publically released? Why did smart glasses never catch on that wousld be the coolest shit.

>send invites before the game is even launched

Businesses that cared about espionage would ban them
Businesses that found then "creepy" because you could be filming women would ban them in their store
Above reason could even lead to cities or states making them illegal
Banned from movie theaters to prevent piracy
Potentially illegal to drive with them to prevent distracted driving
Advertisements in your fucking face
Their use case is mostly covered by smart phones and smart watches already

>Google, open Resident Evil: Modern Warfare 2
huh?

"Google, open Stadia"
>STADIA INITIATED
"Google, search into my contacts for users online"
>SEARCH IN PROGRESS
>25 USERS DETECTED
"Google, send all online contacts an invite for a match"
>CONNECTION LOST: INTERNET PROVIDER HAS TEMPORARILY BLOCKED YOU DUE TO EXCESS DATA USE
"Google, send all online contacts an invite for a match"
>CONNECTION LOST: INTERNET PROVIDER HAS TEMPORARILY BLOCKED YOU DUE TO EXCESS DATA USE
"Google, send all online contacts an invite for a match"
>CONNECTION LOST: INTERNET PROVIDER HAS TEMPORARILY BLOCKED YOU DUE TO EXCESS DATA USE
"GOOGLE, SEND ALL ONLINE CONTACTS AN INVITE FOR A MATCH"
>CONNECTION LOST: INTERNET PROVIDER HAS TEMPOR-
"GOOGLE PLEASE"

Attached: 1546227816044.png (601x601, 401K)

Wouldn't you send an invite to a match after you open the game?

What I don't get is why they said its gonna use so much data, isn't it just streaming video.

Streaming video is the #1 most bandwidth-intensive thing you could do with your internet. If it's high res video then you'll burn through gigabytes in less than a day.

thanks

>my face when switch and ps4 are never going to have competition

Attached: 530EED19-8F1A-4916-A8E7-B866E38164A9.jpg (902x822, 98K)

It plays relaxing noises while it records the sounds of you sleeping and transmits them directly to Google HQ and your government.

Leaf detected

Agree, Apu on the bottom right is kino

disco drag queen detected

Don't worry user, my company is working on a similar product which is sure to meet the market's needs.

Attached: microtops project.png (1358x1029, 1.07M)

NOOOOOO MY SOCIAL CREDIT SCORE AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Talk about being late for your own funeral.

>google give me brain cancer
reminder that all virtual reality headsets and this stadia garbage will do to your brain what the smart meters did to the bush in pic related

Attached: lamo.jpg (1066x800, 335K)

Nobody tell him

Good thing I have this.

Attached: 1553563386975.png (252x186, 31K)

Yes but it doesnt sound as good as you thought
vocaroo.com/i/s19jyhlpXzfs

-2019
-wake up feeling sick after a late night of playing video games
-excited to play some Call of Duty 2k19
-"stadia on"
-...
-"STADIA ON"
-"Please verify that you are "annon332" by saying "Doritos™ Dew™ it right!"
-"Doritos™ Dew™ it right"
-"ERROR! Please drink a verification can"
-reach into my Doritos™ Mountain Dew™ Call of Duty 2k19™ War Chest
-only a few cans left, needed to verify 14 times last night
-still feeling sick from the 14
-force it down and grumble out "mmmm that really hit the spot"
-Stadia does nothing
-i attempt to smile
-"Connecting to verification server"
-...
-"Verification complete!"
-finally
-boot up Call of Duty 2k19
-finding multiplayer match...
-"ERROR! User attempting to steal online gameplay!"
-my mother just walked in the room
-"Adding another user to your pass, this will be charged to your credit card. Do you accept?"
-"NO!"
-"Console entering lock state!"
-"to unlock drink verification can"
-last can
-"WARNING, OUT OF VERIFICATION CANS, an order has been shipped and charged to your credit card"
-drink half the can, oh god im going to be sick
-pour the last half out the window
-"PIRACY DETECTED! PLEASE COMPLETE THIS ADVERTISEMENT TO CONTINUE"
-the mountain dew ad plays
-i have to dance for it
-feeling so sick
-makes me sing along
-dancing and singing
-"mountain dew is for me and you"
-throw up on my self
-throw up on my tv and entertainment system
-router shorts
-"ERROR NO CONNECTION! STADIA SHUTTING OFF"
-"PLEASE DRINK VERIFICATION CAN TO CONTINUE"

>These fools are too oblivious to recognize the TRUE king of consoles.

Attached: 1532997988751.png (758x702, 359K)

you know that bring me some memories of the rage face crazy during the early 10s

Yup, those were the times.

>by having it fight epic and steam
a no contest match if i ever saw one
epic has lost already no matter how many exclusives it buys, the hate for the chinks, the fact that sweeney is a swine and deserves a bullet etc...
google will close this streaming shit in 12 months, like they did on many other projects
i so much hope someone charlie hebdos google offices....