What would you do if Pokémon were real?

Live the childhood that was taken from me.

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Impregnate every single eeveelution

Mating press a Gardevoir.

Capture a ditto and put my stock of photos to good use.

I'll form an evil organization and purposely agitate and try to unleash the pokemon that can manipulate space/time/dimensions

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gamefreak probably just made shit up for the dex

Fuck an espeon

Do some genetical research to gain their power before purging them.
I'll become a god.

PLEASE I JUST WANT NEWS IF WE'RE GOING TO GET A NEW EEVEELUTION. IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT IT IS.

/vp/ isnt a containment board if you read the rules you'd know that newfag

Work for this guy and beat up 10 year olds.

Came here to post this.

Be a Pokemon master

Rape

if pokemon were real, /vp/ would be /an/ though, why would you go back?

Bigger!

most of the pokemon i want to fuck are either extremely dangerous or significantly larger than I am so I would probably not last very long

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I'd ask for a cyndaquil or mareep and become a pokemon trainer.

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honestly itd probably be way comfier to raise a pokemon than to just go around fucking them
but if they're even as smart as dolphins, theyd have urges too

HAHAH SEX! MY PEEPE IS MY ENTIRE PERSONALITY AHAHAHAH SEX DONT YOU LIKE SEX?! HAHA PEPE PENIS FUNNY

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hmm... sweetie, is there something wrong?

>numbers
>in Pokémon

Nothing with numbers in that series can be relied upon. Magcargo for example is apparently hotter than the surface of the sun, but you can touch it.

It's basically canon that the Pokédex is full of nonsense written by children.

Have sex

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retarded fucking skeleton

Its a slippery slope user. The loli junkies working in gamefreak play mindtricks on their fanbase with the poke waifus and before you know it a clear mind is turned into
Prease understandu

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first person youve quoted here
you're right
fuck gamefreak for making me into this

There are multiple cases of pokemon falling in love with their owners. There is also meowth who proves pokemon can learn how to talk. Finally is canon that humans and pokemons were marrying each other in the past before humans ruled the earth.
The way i see it pokemons are the ultimate relationship you can have.

GAMEFREAK GAMES
TURNED ME INTO FURFAG OVERNIGHT
GAMEFREAK GAMES

GAMEFREAK GAMES
SHE LOOKED 18 TO ME
GAMEFREAK GAMES

GAMEFREAK GAMES
THEY'RE JUST ANIME DRAWINGS DONT ARREST ME
GAMEFREAK GAMES

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based

if pokemon were real, we'd be pretty screwed
even ignoring all the legendaries that seem to exist just to fuck everything up every couple of weeks

hey don't get the wrong idea i may be fucked but i am NOT a pedo

You choose to fap to it idiot.

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hug mine for like ten minutes straight

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cursed image
saved

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i dont
the porn is fucking shit most of the time

Why is Glaceon such a pokelet?

Bathtub sex with Vaporeon!

why the fuck does eevee triple in size when he evolves

Mad gains

>only 10 minutes
You disappoint me.

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Good luck with that, user.

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OMP OMP OMP OMP

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Pocket poochy

Catch and creampie a Vulpix.

get an Eevee and love it til it evolved into an Espeon

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based skeleton dabbing on the fleshies

You want friendship user, not love. Affection is how you get Sylveon.