Last thread died

Prostitutes sonic the hedgehog to his local pimp, going agaisnt his morality all towards the hope of marrying his loved one, who when discovering of this matter dumps him because she loves animals and can't bear to see sonic being violently fucked because of her. Afterwards he blames sonic for all of it and hatefucks him, eventually falling in love and marrying him, except this time he prostitutes himself for ring money willingly, leading to a happy marriage?

this.

Sonic will only be in the movie for about 20% if it the rest will be real life shitty actors

Haven't seen one yet

>Eggman hints at running for President with his slogan being an altered Maga logo (or isn’t a parody of Mario, but the M on his hat also has aga next to it)
>Fortnite/Avengers reference
>What ever meme is popular right now
>Sonic meme references like Sanic
>Jab at the Sonic fanbase
>Reference to video games that are not even Sonic or related to sonic
>Eggman plays Puyo Puyo with his assistent named Kirby (at least I hope they would), but only the American versions and any allusions to the series that isn’t Kirby’s Avalanche or Mean Bean are erased
>Taxi has the crazy taxi logo/license plate

Sonic has a scene where he learns about human culture, part of which involved him finding Tom's laptop, he looks himself up and Tom slams the computer down saying that the internet is a dangerous place.

>What ever meme is popular right now
You mean whatever was popular 2-3 years ago.

>Jab at the Sonic fanbase
They aren't that clever. This isn't Sonic Boom we're talking about.

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You nailed it user

>that insufferable part when sonic will pick a guitar and start singing some rock shit song/start rapping
>"something something i remember your videogames"

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at one point Sonic will say "BLUE LIVES MATTER"

Based on the character names on the wiki, he's already married to the main girl.

God I love that show.

>you don't need to tell me twice

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Considering that we are seeing a baby sonic in this shit expect butt and fart jokes

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This and he totally rips a nasty fart later in the movie and says "heh, should have gone easy on the chili dogs"

>sonic underground reference
It would be kino

That looks like something out of tim and eric

if e-celebs aren't vidya this isn't either

Luckily both are related to video games

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When they're in the car, Sonic will turn on the radio and start dancing and singing to some recent pop song

Robotnik twerks. That's the joke.

Sonic disguises as a plush
Sonic sings on a stage and women faint
Robotnik farts and Sonic says "smell ya later, RoBUTTnik!" in either order

JIM CARREY GETS HIT IN THE NARDS!

HIS ARMS ARENT BLUE!!!

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I still can't believe they're getting away with this!

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All I want is at some point for Sonic to be in Sonic's restaurant.
That's all I want from this movie.

I better get a fucking PINGAS reference

A joke about Urkel
Eggman being called Robotnik
Kids playing sega genesis
CWC reference/ blue arms reference
Knuckles being a real person with brass knuckles, probably black with dreads
Pandering to a country where sonic is really popular like the woody woodpecker did with brazil
4th wall breaking
Sonic will hate chili dogs
After credits scene will show Amy
PINGAS
I don't fucking know

My guess is that Jim Carrey will play himself and it will be the only redeemable part of the movie

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There's gonna be a trump joke, isn't there?

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Ace Ventura Bad Future

Chris Chan is boycotting the movie
What do we do?

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>Act 1, Scene 3.
>Tails the Fox Introduction
>Scene Opens
>Tails the Fox is sitting on a park bench.
>Watching the children play.
>Soon he notices that their parents are gone.
>"Time to make my move."

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How much better would the movie be if Eggman's minions were all previous Jim Carrey roles like the Mask or Fire Marshal Bill?

>But during the stone age
what did he mean by this?

I thought he would complain about blue arms

has anyone done this yet?

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I think it's time to admit Sonic isn't, wasn't, and never will be, a good franchise.

I have a terrible premonition that he's going to do more than just boycott it. The shattered pieces of him mind simply can't take this stress.

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shadow/chaos control joke

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The end of the saga... it would be a beautiful end to CWC

It is unfunny joke that Chris actualy tried to explain after decade and it make sense only in his head.

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>Knuckles being a real person with brass knuckles, probably black with dreads
I SURE FUCKING HOPE NOT
also don't expect them to know any of the niche sonic fanbase stuff like CWC, PINGAS, other references to sonic games. The only sonic meme related thing you will see will be sanic.

>The franchise that saw his legend arise will also witness his end
Pretty kino to be honest

The fuck.

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Holy fuck

>not pictured is the awkward tails cough that completely nails the joke

Boom was too good for its time. Ironic too since everyone wrote it off as garbo before it even came out due to the redesigns.

>Chris Chan wont make an appearance

DROPPED

Made me laugh out loud

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you could make a documentary out of this man if he ever did.
considering how much people have watched his every step since childhood and lived his life vicariously through all sorts of online interaction it would be an amazing glimpse into the whole self-destructive tendencies of humans

"You don't need to tell me twice, but if we were in the stone age i wouldn't believe you because that would have never happened, so you would indeed need to tell me twice"
Going from memory, a translation of CWC's mind

Sonic-pun apps and websites

If someone was working on a BINGO card, what should go in the middle? Fart joke?

Sonic goes to an actual Sonic drive-thru and gets a chili dog.

either that or he flosses

honestly a good line considering who's delivering them.

not a good robotnik line but its a good J.C line.

“FAST”

it really does show though

I know trailers do this all the time but every single joke in the trailer was stuff we've seen a million times before

CWC thought cavemen were so dumb you needed to tell them things twice before they got it, it's a stupid joke that only he found funny and had to explain like 10 years later because no one understood it

Pure pottery

user I

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So he maced a random dude over the blue arms.
What will Chris do about Eggman?

honestly its funny because these people are probably protesting to something even more stupid

Please post screenshots from chris chans twitter. I want to see him seething.

hopefully he shoots up a theater

My first thought upon seeing this trailer was how entertaining it'll be to watch Chris throw a shitfit over this.

sensible chuckle/10
it's funny that the logic makes sense, but he actually expected people to understand what the fuck he was saying at first glance

sperg out and shit himself in the theater then go on a twitter rampage, he will probably do the same thing when he watches detective pikachu and realizes mewtwo is the villian

CWCPOSTERS GET OUT.
We're trying to guess jokes here

he hasn't been seething about the trailer yet so for now this is pretty much all we have

>sonic flosses (the popular dance move)
please god no

oh god yes please

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Its been done. Are we forgetting the epic tale of tranny phantom?

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Sonic complains that the car he's riding in is too slow even though it's speeding

>another adaptation of a character that doesn't hold a resemblance until the last 5 minutes of the film

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This show was way too self-aware for its own good. RIP
youtube.com/watch?v=RqUEjGYD3DU

>Only 3 people dead
YAWN

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It helps having one of the showrunners behind Drawn Together working on that show

What about Ace Ventura references? What will be spouted out for old folks to chuckle at?

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I always thought it was referring to the Cretaceous–Paleogene extinction event, which Chris might've considered part of the stone age.

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shoot up a theater god please it will be the perfect ending to the chris-chan saga

Has he seen the stinger yet

Anyone got a webm of jim carreys eyebrow wiggle from Me, myself and irene?

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Internet: We never wanted this trash!!!

Paramount: Well, Sorry to hear that, don't watch it then.

Internet: No! we're still gonna pay to watch it and see the trash that this is!!!

Paramount: *Pic related*

They knew perfectly what people's reaction would be, and they got what they wanted, it's trending topic now. It's Venom all over again.

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>Reference to Chris-Chan in a scene where a guy wearing a sonic necklace faints after seeing Sonic

I can already see this being a scene in the movie.

But it is what we want, right?

>It's Venom all over again

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A fakeout where they play a song they know the audience wants to hear (take your pick, City Escape, Live and Learn, whatever) but a few seconds in it turns into a dubstep remix.

But Venom made money. No fucking way this thing will.

Has any video game movie ever been good? Why do they keep being made? Seems like they never make money and they're never given good reviews.

>movie does well
>sonic gets more awful movies with this shitty design
>movie does bad
>sonic movies never happen again
Double edged sword

Trying to make a few variations of the cards so that some have options that others don't have, but haven't gotten a full 24 yet. Keep going, guys!

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i wouldn't be so sure, venom was 100 million to make while this is 90 M and venom was a lot less popular before release than this was

>double edged sword
you're supposed to include a downside for this phrase to work, user

but didn't some people actually venom? Like so bad it was good?

Would a remix of city escape or live and learn fall into old memes?

>Gets a chili dog from Sonic
>Acknowledging Sonic is naked except for his shoes
>Jab at Sonic fans
>Sonic complains that cars are slow
>Dated memes
>Sonic pretends to be a toy
>Fortnite reference
these are all guaranteed, the rest are up in the air

It absolutely will. It looks so awful that people are going to trip over themselves to pay money to watch it ironically.

>Sonic meme references like Sanic
>News Anchor: Here we have an artists rendition of what the mysterious blue creature looks like
>*cuts to child holding up crayon-drawn Sanic*

Some people actually liked it unironically as a low-key movie about discovering homosexuality

I wish videogames movies keeps getting made until all the this hellish capeshit limbo gets vanished.

Remixing isn't really a meme. I think they meant more like Harlem shake or something

>Sonic picks up a guitar
>plays the first few bass notes of "City Escape"
>shakes his head
>"Nah, that one might be too old for you."
The fact that this sounds reasonable terrifies me.

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I think depending on how Detective Pikachu turns out it might be the first

Silent hill was okay
Mortal kombat is better than the games will ever be.

>discovering homosexuality
what? how? It literally had a straight white male dating a straight white female. how did they come up with that?

twitter.com/Kirbopher/status/1123309823745880064

This was a pretty nice Easter egg on the movies behalf

>Fortnite/Avengers reference
One report already has said Sonic flosses after defeating Robotnik in that car chase we saw.

Venom is his new boyfriend

>as a low-key movie about discovering homosexuality
what

He says he's got places to go, and maybe even adds in that he's got to find his own way.

>1993
>Older brother gets a Sega Genesis to play Mortal Kombat
>Parents don't want to let me play it since violent video games could be a bad influence on me
>They let me play Sonic 2 instead

>2019
>I'm gay for Tails

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remember that scene where jim carrey sucked a woman's breast
wouldn't it be funny if he did the same but with rouge lol

That one scene where everybody dances at the end of the movie.

Is Modern Sonic yet considered ''modern''?

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How the fuck did Sonic do this to a generation? What is it about it? Its characters are cute to appeal to children easily, but there's plenty of other games that do the same that aren't nearly as fetishized.

You'd have to tell sonichu twice in the stone age because he'd be a caveman and caveman are stupid. Thus needing multiple explanations.

Yes I'm serious, Chris explained a few months ago.

Life finds a way.

you can make people fuck any character if its an anthropomorphic animal

>"Nice" replies Robotnik
Oh fucking hell my poor sides

>"Hey look there's some fence hoppers who want a ride to!"
>"PICK EM UP"

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>sonic gets more awful movies with this shitty design
>sonic movies never happen again
Both are acceptable and positive outcomes

I hope there’s a target practice in heaven for him

The only good thing about this trailer was the fact they used the actual sounds from the game and Sonic did a spin dash. Robotnik at the end was okay too I guess. This movies going to be a fucking trainwreck and it’s sad.

Has it been confirmed whether or not other characters will be in this? Tails? Knuckles? Amy? Shadow? Etc.

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Should have been Bryan Cranston

I would've much preferred Scratch and Grounder as characters but a cool reference nonetheless

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Except even Sony didn't want this.

okay that was actually kinda funny

.>releasing a trailer this early for a low quality B-movie

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As I run through Act 2 of the Green Hill,
I take a look at my lives and realize there's 2 still.
‘Cause I've been bouncin and dashin' so long That,
even knuckles thinks that my mind is gone.
But I ain't never smashed a badnick that didn't deserve it,
Me ever goin slow? you know that's unheard of.
You better watch how you talkin' and where you bouncin, Or you and your homies might end up in a Spike pit.
I really hate to trip, but I gotta go fast,
As they croak, I say "if you're not first you're last bitch."
I'm the kinda hog that little furries wanna be like On my quills in the night, makin OC's in the street light.

We been collecting extra lives Livin' in a hedgehog's paradise

Look at the redesign they got me facin'
I can't live a normal life, Sega's begin in the street.
So I gotta be down with the furry team.
Too much television watching, got me chasing rings.
I'm a educated hog with emeralds on my mind
Got my gloves on my hands and green in my eye
I'm a loc'd out hedgehog, bot bashin banger
And I got fans with downs, so don't arouse their anger.
Fool, death ain't nothin' but a Spike pit away I'm livin' life run or die, what can I say?
I've got 4 classic games will I live to see more?
The way things is going I don't know.

We keep spending most our time, waiting on a dying franchise

Emeralds and the furries, Furries and the emeralds
Badnick after badnick, Level after level
Everybody's running, but half of them ain't lookin'
Amy's in the kitchen, but I don't know what's cookin'.
Tails gotta go fast, but nobody's here to teach him
If he can't go fast, how can he reach me?
I guess he can't, I guess he won't I guess they front, that's why I'm out of continues, fool!

Tell me why are they so blind to see That the ones sega hurts are you and me?

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What did he mean by this

gotta admit that song choice was weird as fuck

What were some of the worst examples of this? Cobra Commander really stood out as a dumb one for me.

>wait why are we getting there in my car if you can run much faster?

so unapologetically autistic...its perfect user[spoiler/]

Cute desu, can someone make a real movie out of this?

Just like how The Emoji Movie made $86,053,485? I highly doubt it'll make much more than that, and with its budget, it'll be a financial flop.

At least this one doesn't have a Wilhem scream.

YET

This is actually quite ingenious

Been spending most our lives Livin in a gangstas paradise!
We keep spending most our lives Living in a gangstas paradise!!

I doubt there are going to be extensive references to Sonic-related memes, jabs at the weird fanbase, nods to relatively obscure Sonic games, etc. a la the Sonic Boom cartoon. This is Hollywood we're talking about, here. They're going to scrape together some very baseline knowledge of only the first Sonic the Hedgehog game, and then the rest of its humor will just be "how do you do fellow kids? dab dab dab floss floss epic" or standard observations about how ZANY and WACKY a TALKING BLUE FAST HEDGEHOG is I mean WOW HOLY MOLEY

posting this here because the OC thread died before I was able to finish and it's not worth creating a thread for

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We should call the police for a wellness check because he will lose his mind opening day.

>Sonic says "BLUE LIVES MATTER."
there's not way. twitter, reddit, and tumblr would all shit a brick in unison

Sonic and Eggman tags along for beating a greater villain.

Mortal Kombat although I'm certain it's not because of the directors knowing what they were doing

that's a legit good joke

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How do you look at this man and not start laughing. Fuck this movie is going to be a hilarious trainwreck

This cant be real

MY OWN CLONE! NOW NEITHER OF US WILL BE VIRGINS!

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screencap this

Actual SEGA headquarters\bulding appearing in the movie

>he
>his

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my friend told me he thought this movie looks like shit, yet he is excited about detective pikachu
they look the same lol both are gonna suck ass for adults and both are visually dogshit

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Add
>Pop/Punk song during montage
>Jab at Mario
>Someone plays a Sega Genesis

does chris even give a shit if people misgender him?

i liked it, tom hardy's performance was really fun and the animations and set pieces with venom looked really cool, theres a really feral and savage nature to the way venom stomps around biting peoples heads off. script was subpar but it got right the one thing it needed to get right which was the eddy brock+venom dynamic and cool looking symbiotes

The part in the trailer where Eggman said "Nice, I wish I had a milky mommy" really felt unnecessary

>wooden doors! haha no way!

Thanks for playing along!

Noice

Do I think it'll happen? No. Did the idea of it make me chuckle and think "Maybe"? It sure did.

youtube.com/watch?v=2SjUi7UY3fg

why do these "women" attack poor gamestop employees?

>cop sketch or stupid kid draws sanic
>thats no good
>sonic gets trapped in a washing machine
>sonic will wear some dumbass disguise in order to get something he needs from a store and the disguise will seemingly fail because he reaches is arm out and they will mistake his white hand for gloves

Mental illness.

kino

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Someone will call him sanic by mistake

This, I think dance sequence endings are still popular for some stupid reason.

Really makes you wonder why Sonic fled from his home planet as a baby

the movie is sonic being chased by the military, if they dont have a city escape or metal harbor like scene ill be disappointed

You mean the black chick?
wow this movie has every awful Hollywood cliche. even their weird interracial fetish.
black & white couples in real life about %0.5
black & white couples in Hollywood over 60%

This is going to be vidya kino

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I could honestly see this appearing in the movie if Tails is a character

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FASTER

If theres a scene which recreates the opening of Sonic Adventure 2 with him escaping the military out of a Heli and skating down the street with the City Escape music playing I will actually nut in my pants. The rest of the movie can be shit, but if that’s in there I will get a massive nostalgia boner.

...

Someone is gonna say snooping as usual

Looking forward to Knuckles post-credit sequence.

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That or obligatory female lead falls in love with cop, and in the end proposes with ring

I wanna call it now: Tails won’t be in the movie at all until the very end in a post credit scene to set up the next movie

he is JUST'd already

Cop stutters awkwardly and lets out a few Freudian slips while trying to talk to the attractive female lead.
>I uh, I w-wish you the breast-BEST!

Seriously? Fucking hell I might actually watch it then.
Drawn Together was miles ahead of other cartoons at the time and since and I miss it.

>I'm going to die
>did I do thaaaaat?
Too good to be real

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>rub that in my orphaned face

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Everyone hated the game for good reasons but the show had a lot of great tongue-in-cheek humour

I got the picture sent to me by a relative who I half pay attention to and half don't so I guess I missed the part where he said Aladdin was gonna be 95% arabs. I guessed the picture was Jafar in the live action Aladdin when he sent and asked who I thought it was.

I cant wait.

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Drawn together would have been better if 80% of the jokes weren't about fucking each other and tuna fish snatches

Won't lie, the joke at the end of the trailer about a kid in the bag gave me a chuckle.

they could have just said its an animal. At worst they'll get animal cruelty, but now they look like kidnappers

Fucking writers

kek

youtu.be/t-uY2QpW51I

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they don't even watch the source material so that wont happen.

Please give it to me fast

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Yeah but it still had five times as much genuinely funny moments per episodes than South Park at that era, let alone the zombie abortion that show is now.

Not to mention they did more with animation and background gags than any other adult animated show.

Tfw I'm black and my wife is white

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>Ro-BUTT-nick

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That hack writing

Nice :)

>Sonic... I've come to talk to you about the Smash Bros. initiative.

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So what are the chances Chris Chan goes columbine?

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lucky you. black women are crazy.

I assume they can hear it talking my dude.

This hurts so much

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>wanting sonic adventure related to this mess

Card 1 is done. Still adding jokes tho

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I agree, but what I mentioned is a major reason why it got panned and didn't last long. They had some genuinely good material and it remains one of my favorites, but they screwed the pooch, literally. You have good taste, though. I wish it would have been more popular than it was.

Wait. There are people not gay for Tails?
Who do they want changing their diapers?

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I mean i agree with him

>THOSE TEETH

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The movie would be a 10/10 easily.

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I think this image is actually hot

What is wrong with me?

We need a two part Netflix series 10 hours in total called something like
“The yellowman”
Or “Extreme fans”
Hell even “Stone age”

You're a degenerate furry

>could make a documentary out of this man
>if he ever did.

Lmao he doesn't know lads

Sonics orgins actually seem like they could work.

not him but if you browse Yea Forums you're a degenerate in general

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>Attracted to the most well documented autism magnet on the internet
>What's wrong with me lol

You also have the stupid I'm afraid

I like tails he's so cute and fluffy x3

>top looks bad but better than the design in the movie
what fresh hell is this

A refrence to ocs
A part where sonic runs through a crowd cheering
Sonic gets bugs in his eyes running

>you browse Yea Forums meme
You're Basic

I'm sorry man it's the truth
have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately and just cried a little

>sonix defeats Eggman
>sonic says sexist jokes
>amy comes in and punches him in the balls
>rings start flying everywhere
>'MY EMERALDS'
>everyone puts their hands on their crotch sharing the pain
>knucles says 'oohh dats gotta hurt'
>camera pans into sky'
>Stan Lee says 'NUFF SAID' from Heaven

There were actually multiple Sonic Boom games. When people think of Boom, they think of Rise of Lyric, the really bad one.
The others are alright.

Don't you mean Yuji Naka? Stan Lee doesn't make sense in that context.

This movie will barely make back its cost at the box office, will get middling reviews by "professional" critics, and will be absolutely hilarious when you smoke a joint and watch it. I can feel it in my plums.

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>deflection
Kek

I'll take that as a yes

>sonic rolls but gets dizzy and says something like "that wasn't the brightest idea I've had.."

>sonic tries to communicate with urban wildlife, including a raccoon which latches onto his face and mauls him

>someone asks the obvious "why are you naked", to which he responds "No I'm not. Can't you see I'm wearing tennis shoes?"

>swipes jewelry hoping to power up

>he gets insulted when someone begs him not to shoot his spines at them.

>i win lol

I would love that.

you know what
here

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Please keep giving me (You)s

what the fuck kind of animal expresses how it cant breath in a bag with english words? you are too brain dead to follow the scene showing that they clearly heard him talk but you feel compelled to criticize other peoples writing?

here's another
you know user, you're not a bad feller

Furry scum

So do you wanna fuck? i get this vibe you want my dingus in your butt.

yawn nah I don't really feel like it

DON’T CALL ANYBODY

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We already have hours upon hours of documentaries on YouTube about him. But if he ended the saga with a bang, we would have way more. Real life kino is always the best.

Card 2 is done

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Can't wait for the Coldsteel reference!

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>implying I don't pirate everything I watch unless it's on netflix (which I don't personally pay for)

He's too A-list

A "not in a million years"-esque joke where he gets black and red paint on him

Sonic and his cop buddy have a falling out around halfway through the movie, but make up before the end.

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It's by the director of the first Deadpool, guys. This movie will be fine.

not even a sonic fan but why didn't they at least put live and learn?

Tails is cute. I want to hold him.

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Card 3

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Damn I can't wait for the cop and his significant other to be having a rough spot in their relationship but thanks to his time with Sonic he learns how to go fast in love or something and they're happy again

DUDE SELF AWARE LMAO

these "jokes" are awful every time I see them

This but unironically and between 5 and 10 times

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I would rather watch this than the garbage they will put out

Could this movie end up being so bad it's good? At least meme wise?

You guys are actually making me want to go see this movie just to fill these cards out.

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kek

I'm making myself want to go see the movie just so making putting these cards together was worth it.

youtube.com/watch?v=VqKD1hehXCI

Reminder that this show was actually extremely redpilled

youtube.com/watch?v=c9ZT9CG7OWM

This is the last card I'm personally making. I hope 4 is enough.

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Tails looks rather strung out

SNOOPINGAS USAL I SE

the warcraft movie was ok
which is good by video game movie standards

The fucking bit with Shadow and Eggman is so painfully on point it physically hurts. It's goddamn perfection and I barely even know Sonic games.

I bet this would do better in the box office

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ALL SYSTEMS FULL POWER

>LE SELF AWARENESS LOL! XD

these jokes are shit.

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tfw im black and i dont have jap wife

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>MY EMERALDS
kek

Faster

so what do we do if its actually kino

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Will it be better or worse than this?

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It's actually going to be a postmodern deconstruction of movie adaptations of movies

This movies gonna be a pretty bold crossover, does that mean the aliens were actually eggman all along?

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actually is woody woodpecker movie
it's literally that

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Same thing we do if it's shit.

Meme.

Doing god's work user

covalent bonds bitch

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rofl

You can always pirate it later if you must. The cards aren't going anywhere, they'll still be there when some poor bastard inflicts a torrent upon the internet.

Not a prediction about the jokes: Silver Sonic appears as a secondary villain but is called Metal Sonic.

he could ironically save this film but if theres any dindu music actually in the movie it automatically gets a 0/10

>dimensional merge
>begins with sonic appearing alongside actors in the movie
>ends with sonic using the souls of the scarified in the theatre to enter the real world
it’s happening

>sonichu is with them
just as the prophecy foretold

user, look up the budget and box office numbers for The Emoji Movie

this new mad max antagonist is looking pretty cool.

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>
I wouldnt mind 90's rap, or 90's music in general, it fits with Sonics original role as a "too cool for school" foil to mario. But this film looks painfully average and aside from Jim Carrey whos basically reprising his role as Ace Ventura (bad guy edition), the casting is boring

aw yeah this is happenin

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Fury needs an extra R

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I have to sadly and begrudgingly agree. Meta jokes arent as funny to me as they used to be. Maybe i just need a break from them

Shouldn't it be a post credits Shadow Sequence?

That's actually funny so it can't be in the movie

>sonic spins around someone and strips them down to their polka dot boxers
>someone holding onto sonic does the wind-tunnel face
>sonic wears a disguise to blend in, but his fashion sense is so awful he draws attention instead
>"I HATE THAT HEDGEHOG"
>sonic floors it if/when he gets behind the wheel of anything
>some idiot scientist links chaos theory with emeralds

Mad Furry, Maximum Road

Just dawned on me that it would be kind to put the template here too

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There must be some kind of allusion to the Super Mario Bros movie

>”I HATE THAT HEDGEHOG”

Unironically excited for this line to be dropped

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I’VE COME TO MAKE AN ANNOUNCEMENT

TAKASHI IIZUKA IS A BITCH ASS MOTHERFUCKER

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millennials eat that shit up

>Sonic eats a baby
>"What? Hedgehog eat their young."

Mortal Kombat 1 is an ok watch imo

deviantart.com/joeadok/art/Little-Amy-Rose-790573904

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>sonic walks into a jewelry store
>starts stealing all of the rings thinking they're all magic

Now this is a believable line, nice editing.

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I'm getting mad just thinking about it.

I wouldn't be surprised if this is true.

>Amy predicted this movie

I thought Pollock hated that meme.

>I'm going to die

Every time

He did a while ago in a tweet or something after the first images of Sonic from the movie were released.

I haven't seen this fucking picture in ages, thank you

If Chris was "Solid/Venom Chris" and Chris Chandler was "Liquid Chris", along with "Solidus Chris" assisting Chris, who was Big Chris?

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First time here eh

>western gaming

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>bald Eggman scene
>music starts
>I AM THE EGG-
>it ends abruptly with a "to be continued" screen

Just do it because a sequel will never happen

youtube.com/watch?v=al9GSRQ-URU

All you'd really need to do is take the basic plots of any of the Mario and Luigi RPG games and turn it into a movie.

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The la li sonic chu

Which one Yea Forums

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I love this-summer-posting

fortnite cameo.

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Robobor is a crossed eyed drooling retard, while Otnikkinto has the talents of a chameleon.

PLEASE TELL ME THIS IS LEGIT?!

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a scene where Tails is seating on a bench

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The humor has always sucked, the animation was horrible. Fuck the people who defend the Boomtoon

MOCK

I almost feel like joining the boycott

who is that nigress?

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Same, I want Jim Carrey to start stomping around and shout "I HATE THAT HEDGEHOG" at the top of his lungs

youtube.com/watch?v=2zhPhow2EGE

i fell unconscious from laughing so hard, holy fuck

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You can go take nice big trip to fuck off land

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Jim Carrey referencing a past role would actually be good.

Tails sitting on a bench
Dance ending sequence
Sonic will call Robotnik 'Eggman' as an insult
The movie will bomb 'free space'
Romantic interest will be named Amy Rose
Sonic will take off his shoes. Smelly feet joke Foot porn takes off like a rocket

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sup woo

youtube.com/watch?v=Ikc_uZw2mqo

That one was straight up garbage, being better is a simple task.

Yes.
Yes!

>e621 joke
>Yea Forums joke
>a scene of the giant black truck transforming into bigger truck and chasing him into a city, intro to city escape plays but time pauses and sonic looks at the camera "Hey, this feels familiar..' scene continues with city escape playing
>Nintendo joke
>Professor pikachu cameo
>Eggman tries to clone sonic but accidentally makes sonichu and sanic
>sonic holding a gun saying a shadow line
>post scene is Eggman making robot sonic
>BIG the cat cameo

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>gangastas paradise being played within the first fucking few seconds
Based turbo retard. The movies gonna be dog shit regardless. All sonic is now is “so bad it’s good”

That would be too funny. Not very funny, but too funny for this movie.

Bob.

>movie uses tall skinny actor for fat, angry egg shaped scientist
Why didn't they just use Danny Devito

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Danny Devito is a weak old man who doesn’t know what video games are

Do people unironically enjoy this kind of writing?
These actors are supposed to be portraying humans right? they all act like fucking aliens or some shit.
Humans don't talk like this, and they definitely don't just walk off staring at their phones if someone just implied child abduction.
It's like watching aliens in human suits but said aliens insist they are human.

postmodernism has corroded your common sense

Its just a kids movie why do you care?
>Its just a kids movie why do you care?
Its just a kids movie why do you care?
>Its just a kids movie why do you care?
Its just a kids movie why do you care?
>Its just a kids movie why do you care?

jews run hollywood and i wouldn’t really consider them human, so i think you’re onto something here

Don't forget
>eggman is supposed to be smart, how do we make jim sound smart?
>ah fuck it just make him talk really fast for one scene then act like jim in every other scene, that should do it

In a classroom, if you don’t punish a child for doing something wrong, they’ll do it and other kids will do it to
And if you punish them after allowing their behavior the first time, they’ll learn nothing because you reinforced the behavior and then punished it. They won’t learn.
Similarly, if you let this kind of shitty writing get off scot free at all then people will imitate it and emulate it, and by the time it becomes a problem you’ll make getting rid of that bad practice that much more difficult because you didn’t establish that it was unacceptable

>DURH WE MAKE HOW HIM SMART TALK?
>Make him talk fast with DA HIGH IQ Words!!!
>YOU GET A RAISE
god i hope this fucking trope dies.

>despite making up only 13% of hedgehog OC's, Shadow-clones are responsible for 50% of cringe

>I'm going to die.

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Autism, even the mayor hates this shit, imagine being more autistic than chris.

The shitposting is fun and all we it doesn’t the fact that we are still getting a Mario Movie from illumination

youtube.com/watch?v=t-uY2QpW51I

DEEPEST LORE

Holy shit, it all comes full circle.
Maybe the song WAS intentional???

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Its paramount, a company that made 5 godawful transformer movies and not 1 of them featured the touch. City escape ain't happening.

>The camera zooms out as a parody of This Is America performed by Weird Al called "Hedgehog America" plays.
This is so incredibly specific but I almost believe it

>Its a new robot on my "E" series
>I call it E-621
It can happen

Screencap this.

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Beautiful

>Implying the writers at paramount even know what that is
I expect only the most basic of basic sonic jokes:
>gottah go fast
>chili dogs
>sonic is naked!
>sonic mentions something being cool or not in a pun
Hoping for anything else is just setting yourself up for disappointment user.

youtu.be/T4KHpo6hEEA

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I thought I was the only one. I actually lost muscle control from laughing.

Astronomically high

fuck, ugandan knuckles confirmed

“That’s it! When we get back, I’m getting a pair on pants!”

I blame Lola Bunny in Space Jam for both, catalizing the sexualization of anthropomorphic cartoon animal characters AND bringing those cartoons up to a human-cartoon shared universe.

Shhh, you're not allowed to talk about that. Hollywood Jews would shit themselves if it got out...

youtu.be/yy87Z3T9BcU

I'd bet money they'd pull something similar to that one Sonic X comic panel where he meets a real hedgehog

that would be top tier cringe.
i really hope it will be there.

This is about as depressing as that one mario brothers movie copypasta.

are you talking about this

yes

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youtube.com/watch?v=FWqimMpbTyU

yup

we already have a sonic movie. why didn't they just release that on blu-ray with a bunch of exclusive bonus features?

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>the journey to the hell
ESL shit

DON'T

He thinks dinosaurs were around during the stone age and that a meteor hit earth during that period and they all died because they didn't know to run? My only way of making sense.

outstanding

sonic, we gotta cook

haven't left my house in 5 years bros but I'm going to the theatres to see this one

can't you just pirate it

Bumblebee had the touch

pretty sure everybody likes to watch a nice trainwreck

that's illegal

>nobody cares enough to steal it

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We band together to make it so fucking successful that he lives in eternal agony. Let's get this movie a few fucking sequels

the cheese touch

Honest question /sthg/ would you go see this?
youtu.be/YcO45JAonaM

there is no modern or classic, there's only sonic

>Owen Wilson as Luigi
Sounds dope.

Meta humour is down there with reference humour, as the punchline isn't even a joke, it's "this isn't real, lol".
In Sonic Boom's defence though, it had some pretty funny comments to make about itself and the franchise.
Cringy meta humour can be found in such high quality entertainment as Rick and Morty, Family Guy and the last 25 years of the Simpsons.

I guess I will just buy a ticket and not coming to the theatre.

>Robotnik crawls out of the asshole of the Death EGG

guys, why I'm starting... to... like... , I think he looks funny... and... cute..........

How can he dodge a bunch of missiles but not a tranq dart?

I want to smell your swamp ass chair

Well if you decide you like it, feel free to completely break from the groupthink and actually give it an honest chance. Memes rot your brain.

>Sonic restaurant sponsor
>Sonic complains about cars being too slow
>Sonic pets a real hedgehog
>Star Wars reference about the Death Egg as if no one would come to that conclusion themselves
>"MY NAME IS SONIC AND I'M HERE TO SAY" rap
>Someone plays a Sega Saturn
>Someone uses a Sonic Fidget Spinner
Ah I get the reference

I'm not saying you're right, but if I see CWC in the theater with me, you best believe I'm fucking outta there faster than Sonic.

hahahaha

wtf bruh hahh

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>"A mere rodent cannot defeat the genius that is Doctor Robotnik!"
>As Robotnik cackles, Sonic kicks him between the legs
>All the army soldiers say "OOOOOOOOOH!" in unison and close their legs in sympathy
>A dog-like robot covers its eyes and makes a pained whirr sound
>James Marsden says "Damn!"
>Adam Pally just shakes his head
>Tika Sumpter quips "THAT'S GOTTA HURT!"
>Dr. Robotnik turns to the camera with a silly high-pitched voice
>"Yowie zowie, right in the chaos emeralds!"
>cuts to the director eating a chili dog
>"Nuff said!"
>roll credits

> I guess it's true that we are all living in a gangsta's Paradise
*Song starts playing*
*Credits roll*

hahaha nice

This movie cannot be "merely" bad. This needs to be either so trashy or cringe that it snaps that part of your brain where "bad" becomes hilarious.

I thought shadow was the coolest shit and a cute when i was like 10

>implying the writers have even played the games
the jokes are going to be Alvin and the Chipmunks-tier, user

fcc might bed the biggest troll of all time ahahahah

fcc those writers haha

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and jim carrey does??

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SEGA

sanic mmmh oh fuck AHAHHHAHHHAH AHAHH AHHHHHHAAAAAA

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>Sonic Dabs

I’m close to the production and I can confirm they are not in the film.

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>someone calls him out for being naked
>"huh, guess you're right."
>puts on gloves

this should have been bronson

sonic makes a joke about how fast he cums. joke is meant for adults, but kids don't get it

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>not mario boxers

>no bartleby
>no juicy fat sonic asscheeks
what is sega smoking?

Seething Sonicuck

an explosion either from fighting sonic or experimenting on sonic's hair will cause robotnik to lose his hair, causing the eggman nickname

The eyes on taxidermy fox make it look like it's official art

when he was first shown here i thought it didn't look bad. Then i saw his body (and teeth)

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This shit sounds so believable now

>"Yeah, it's always better to go fast!"
>Marsden's wife gives him a look

Why did they make him really OP with those missiles?

Jaleel White cameo. He should still be alive.

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What's this image from?

>it's real
they gave the writers infinite leeway with this show eh?

a reverse image search led me to some kind of Japanese commercial. I stopped caring after that.

The Professor Layton movie is pretty good

I already did that, got nothing from it

Phoenix Wright movie is great.

He is right you know.

>Has any video game movie ever been good?
Yakuza: Like a Dragon

Only problem with this image is that female athletes aren't equivalent to male athletes. They're less physically capable, that's the entire reason that we have female sports leagues and male sports leagues being separate.

Also that it implies that feminism is about equality, which it isn't since feminism is about women's rights, which doesn't have to mean equal rights.

CALL

>sonic flosses

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>you now remember the episode where they actually seriously made fun of Chris Chan

ANYBODY

I predict thinly veiled references to his friends but none of them actually appear
>Sonic busts into a pet store
>brief moment of confusion where he's looking over a tank of hedgehogs
>maybe screaming about how it's inhumane

You already missed one of the craziest references

youtube.com/watch?v=KVrVhoDeXFM

There is NO WAY this was not intentional

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jim carrey is trash with his political paintings

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You're joking, right?
>Majima's eyepatch is on the wrong eye.
>Majima's voice is barely Kansai-ben, it's like some guy from Tokyo is trying to do a Kansai accent.
>Story farts around with a bunch of side characters that weren't even in the game.

How hasnt CWC already killed himself? Blue arms already caused him to turn into a tranny, this time I was honestly expecting him to suicide bomb SEGA or something

big kek

WAT

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That's the thing that urks me. Feminists want more rights than men. It's crazy how any sane man would support that.

newfag

>”Woah hey don’t forget about me!”

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But will there be Sticks the Badger?

Will she share the same VA from Sonic Boom?
Coz I kinda want her to

Uncharted sells pretty well.

It's looking like they're planning for this movie to basically be the origin story for Sonic (he's an alien) and Robotnik (who ends up on an alien planet at the end of the movie with his signature appearance for the first time in the movie).
I would guess that this is meant to set up for a sequel in the event that the movie actually does become a break-out hit so the sequel can be set back on Sonic's home planet with Robotnik trying to capture all the animals to harvest the energy that organisms from Sonic's home world seem to generate.

If that sequel happens then that's likely where we'll see Tails and Knuckles at least, probably also Shadow as an antagonist created by Robotnik using genetic engineering and robotics to fight Sonic.

So basically if you want to see any of the other animal characters then make sure the movie succeeds so we can get sequels and more Sonic characters can be recreated in this creepy-ass style.

>sonic meets human
>sonic is explaining who he is and being wacky
>runs around human really fast, making them spin around and get dizzy
>green hill ear rape clip plays while he's running around them

Lex Luthor in Man of Steel spends the entire movie with a full head of hair and doesn't appear bald until that Batman Superman sequel with no explanation.

This

They're written by lizard people. We don't really understand humans very well.

He'll get the high score.

There's no way anyone thought this look was a good idea. Is this some Producers type scheme to lose money because of German tax law or whatever?

That honestly explains a lot

>scene with a record player
>record is playing the sonic the hedgehog theme
>sonic stands on top of the record and runs fast to make it go fast
>music speeds up and becomes distorted
>green_hill_ear_rape.mp3

i hope not, because im sure melissa mcarthy would be on it.

Sonic is at a hospital and spools of medical bandages fall on top of him and unravel around his arms and legs

"I do not like this look at all!"

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Yeah I could see that, seems like something they'd do.

Christ you people are such massively whiny sensitive faggots

I liked it and I'm not fan of whole superhero thing in general.