Why yes, i did join the Navy instead of going pro, how could you tell?

>oh get ready for MOP4 drills starting tomorrow, admiral such and such is going to be observing
Fuck

>oh and we will be doing piss and breathalyzer tests when you get back to the boat, no funny business!
this is why surface fleet is a joke

>I need to get drunk to have fun
What is it like having 0 personality?

I never said that though

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For what other purpose would you intoxicate yourself?

What did he do in the Navy anyway?

>where he played football briefly becomes a major point of contention
kino

Because it tastes good?

not him, but sometimes i check akashic records

Found the faggot without an ounce in interest in his body who just spergs out about how others have to be boring to do X, Y or Z and that if they were as interesting as he was they'd just have to sit at home reading technical manuals to be truly content

I seriously hope you're talking about spirits then and not beer

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Get gains

Played Navy Ball

Eat shit senator.

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What team did he play for

Probably some cushy ivy league

are you saying spirits taste better than beer?

Navy sucks. Full of blowhards and try hard and fags.

I should know, I was in the Navy.

Good ratings are nuke and ET. Lazy ratings are in supply and logistics.

Should have gone for chairforce drone operator.

Most of my IT shop was pretty chill. I kinda miss them.

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>Good ratings are nuke
What fucking rate were you? Even nukes hate nukes.

Is it really that bad? I almost joined but then I decided on the Air Force
Which is amazing.

>tfw I was going to join the Air Force but the Recruiting Office was always closed

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Yeah, mines was the same. I really had to fight for it. I made sure to get any contact info I needed then flood them with texts and calls.

Anyone else notice that the US navy getting BTFO'd has been the cause of almost every major american war?
>impressment of sailors led to war of 1812
>sinking of the Maine lead to the Spanish American war
>unrestricted submarine warefare sinking American ships contributed to the US joining WW1
>Pearl Harbor led to US joining WW2
>gulf of Tonkin led to escalation of Vietnam conflict
At this point it seems like the navy is just a lure that we throw out to give us a reason to attack other people

Not american but

>Go to join army
>Excel at fitness tests regarding upper body strength
>Pass cardio tests but got slightly above average score because fuck cardio amirite?
>Pass intelligence test with 7 as my score where 9 is the highest and 5 is average.
>Go talk to psychologist
>Try to be easy going and self-confident, basically just the epitome of "be yourself" meme.
>She tells me to fuck off and that I didn't pass the psychology evaluation
>Pure wtf but don't make a scene out of it, think maybe it's a test
>Army guy gives me my papers and says goodbye
>Not a test
>I just get to go home

Absolute wtf, the only thing I can think of doing wrong was that I lolled a little when she asked me if I had been raped earlier in my life, but honestly who the fuck wouldn't be caught a little off guard by that question?

Anyways, anyone know any mercenary gangs I can join without prior military experience? I play lots of Military Simulators and I watch lots of movies so I have a foundation.

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what do you do there

anyone ever notice that the us's favorite pretence for war is them sinking their own ships?

they just saw that you have actual potential to be somebody in life and let you go instead of being some random nobody serving Israel interests user

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Unironically thanks for this. Made me feel better.

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m8 you're fucked up if you can't pass a psych eval you're actually trying to pass. literal psychopaths can manage that

>I lolled a little when she asked me if I had been raped earlier in my life,
Yeah that's definitely one thing that got you dinged, I imagine there was more
>but honestly who the fuck wouldn't be caught a little off guard by that question?
being caught off is one thing, laughing at the question is a bit different

That just means they saw you were too clever/independent/stubborn to make a robot out of.

Army isn't interested in your welfare, user, it wants mouthbreathing meat for the grinder. Be happy you dodged that bullet.

Give me the benefit of the doubt here, you weren't there.

It was basically her asking lots of yes/no questions in a quick succession, right after asking something completely normal she just said really quick "Have you ever been raped", I gave a nervous chuckle and said "no" with a smile.

Yeah man, that sounds a little weird to me
I'm no psych though so who knows

Think before you speak

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so basically she checked if you were just faking shit and turns out you were

I wasn't faking anything. Gave honest answers to every question.
Can you honestly say you wouldn't have reacted similarly in my situation? I honestly don't see any problem with it, it's not like I started howling with laughter and clapping my hands while screaming "RAPE??" and laughing.

Good thing I'm not a psychopath then.

>Try to be easy going and self-confident, basically just the epitome of "be yourself" meme.

aight m8

>hey, as long as it works

This is what Star Wars fans eventually become. Let that sink in Yea Forums tourists.

Alright, the faults probably on me here for not being clear enough, I was speaking to her like she was a friend, basically trying to be myself the way I am with people I actually hang out. Hence the "Be yourself".

I don't blame you for getting it wrong though, we're all so used by greentexts were everyone is a complete sperg.

this is absolute bullshit, no one drinks alcohol for the taste. Anyone who says otherwise is just full of shit looking for attention.

>this is absolute bullshit, no one drinks alcohol for the taste.
whatever helps you sleep at night user.

>oh get ready for MOP4 drills starting tomorrow, admiral such and such is going to be observing.

>Good ratings are nuke
No

Made omlettes

look man i'm not the one failing psych exams here

I'm not patronizing you or questioning your mental health, not sure where that came from, was just trying to clear up a misunderstanding. Not everyone you meet is looking to argue or out to get you. Have a good day, or if you want to keep talking you could post your discord or something so we stop ruining OPs thread.

see this strained "i'm friendly, comfortable, and not at all out of balance from this exchange" thing here? yeah

>Have a good day, or if you want to keep talking you could post your discord or something so we stop ruining OPs thread.
I think I'm starting to get why you failed your psych exam.

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what's the fattest branch?

Alright, it's quite clear you're just looking to argue. Being friendly is not straining for me, it's completely normal and adult to be comfortable with trying to defuse an argument, apologizing for mistakes etc etc. Have fun, I'm choosing to not take anymore of your bait.

There were a good amount of fat fucks on my ship when I was still in the Navy

I thought the USMC was the chad group?

Theyre all getting pretty bad at the NCO level

t. literally never even seen a marine

I worked in a Navy galley for a year.
>usually 2 types of starches, one "healthy" option and one less than
>some kind of shite steamed veggie
>2 types of meats, usually fish for one and something fatty for the other
>most people go for the chicken tendies and fries or equivilant during lunch
>unlimited packaged sweets and chips on a rack by the drinks that people always use up fast
>same for the dessert fridge

Why do you think they're eating crayons?

They don't need no nutritional content, flavor, or any other resources at all. Fucking marines and their "hurr durr we're too good for new equipment, WE make due," faggots.

i could go for some fish right about now

They're sterotypically tougher but dumber. In reality they're just as much drooling monkeys as the rest of the armed forces main workforce.

Grew up with dad in the army. Can confirm this is legit, the food is ass

God I wanna be a marine so bad they eat the best food.

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Shut up drunk trash

Alright but why did my shitposting thread become a blogpost about the military

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>tfw when no genki glow in the dark gf

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Yea Forums just does whatever it wants, gotta roll with the punches

t. Child
Go back to eating your sweets, and candy and drinking your sodie pops. But remember this is an 18+ board so not everyone has childish tastes such as yours.