Hello my children. I have taken time out of my busy schedule to offer my help to you...

>off by 1
Guess I'm on my own.

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Truly the most challenging boss of all. Good luck, I can't help you.

6 get and the fucker gets nailed to a stick again.

Awww shit nigga, you gonna get helped

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Rollin for christ

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You know, your dad's house is on fire. Maybe tell him to do something about it? It was a pretty one so it would be a shame if something happened to it.

Fuck off Jesus, HAIL SOL INVICTUS

Why have you gone astray, my lambs?
What boss troubles you?
The French have denied me, and so I deny them.

Is that you, varg?
Don't you have inane youtube videos to record?

Joke's on him, I'm gonna use it on a boss that CAN'T be beaten. You know, one of those boss fights you have to lose to progress the game. Even the power of God can't overcome the power of railroading. First commandment of the RPG Bible: "But thou must."

Roll

Thanks regardless. I'll do my best.

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>lambs
I'm not some sheep
Goats are cooler

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I want to play co-op game with you. I need someone to just talk to while we play. You can choice the game to play.

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>Why have you gone astray, my lambs?

Ah, nothing personal, Jesus. I just think it's hilarious that the son of God shows up preaching a message of peace and tolerance and gets nailed to a fucking stick for it. It's like, wow, okay, that backfired spectacularly.

I need to get through this guy, pls help

maybe you could give me a lift to go above?

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wait what happened. All I heard was that a cathedral was on fire?

who started it?

My son, it was literally the jews that did that to me. Assholes!

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Please help me finish Asura's Wrath.

Jesus will not abandon you.

Solaire, our lord and jolly coop saviour.

please help me find a job

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please help me masturbate, jesus

Not today, Schlomo.

Help me with life Jesus-kun

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Help me with suicide Jesus
I am the final boss that I need to kill

It doesn't matter who did it Jesus, it's the act itself that makes it funny. You show up preaching peace and get nailed to a cross for it. And now the thing that was used to kill you is the symbol of the religion that bears your name. I kind of wish you had been raped to death by gigantic cocks because it would be supremely hilarious to see Christians wearing necklaces with cocks on them.

Fuck yeah, science!

Where would jews find gigantic cocks, though?
They'd need to train a horse to rape or something. To Mr. Hands people.

My son, this preoccupation with cocks is worrying. Do you leave the house often? I was once trapped in a tomb for three whole days before I finally left.

Could you take over the wheel for me jesus?

Preoccupation with cocks is natural.
If we weren't supposed to think of cocks, our prostates wouldn't be conveniently located.

Reminder Jesus was the first weeb. He basically invented anime.

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Ow the edge

>Where would jews find gigantic cocks, though?

Where they left them, on the other side of the Red Sea.

Cocks are funny, don't get snippy with me, it's your dad's fault they look so funny.