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this wont end well

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Two old ladies are standing naked in a river catching fish.
Suddenly one goes: "Whoops, slipped right through the cracks"

Jew

What's the difference between a vampire and a jew?

One is a vile, blood-sucking parasite that recoils at the sight of a crucifix, and the other is a vampire.

How do make a lawyer taller?

Feed him viagra.

Jewtendo

[UNSOLICITED OPINIONS ON DIAMOND CITY]

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I collect semen.

Hi, OP's mom.

How do you take a census in israel?

Roll a penny down the street

Cow Tools

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good goy nintendo

Nintendo is very much like the Jews.
No matter how hard Europe tries, it just can't seem to destroy them.

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Four campers went swimming. Two of them were eaten by dolphins. The other two made it back to the campsite.
Four all in tents and porpoises.

A pirate walked into a bar with a steering column coming out of his pants. The bartender asked, "what's with the wheel?" The pirate said, "Arr, it's drivin' me nuts!"

>What’s more disgusting than a pile of dead babies?
One baby still alive in the middle of the pile.
>What’s more disgusting than that?
He starts eating his way out.
>What’s more disgusting than that?
He makes it out.
>What’s more disgusting than that?
He goes back in for seconds.

Why did the snail take so long to put on his shell?

Cuz he was feeling sluggish

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Man thats interesting to see
Nintendo and Sony are somewhat neck-a-neck with Nintendo in the lead in N. America
Sony is dominating Europe while Nintendo Dominates Japan
Poor Xbone though

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza?

A pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven.

the "State of Play"station 4

>What’s the difference between a dump truck full of babies and a dump truck full of bowling balls?
You can’t unload bowling balls with a pitchfork.

Did you hear about the new pirate movie? It's rated "arrrr!"

...

One Jew says to another Jew: “Hey David that’s a nice watch you’ve got.”
The other Jew, David, says: “Thanks, my father sold it to me before he died.”

What's the difference between a pile of dead bodies and a Ferrari?

I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Something funny

kek

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How do catch an elephant?

Step 1: Dig a hole large enough to contain an elephant. Using heavy machinery like backhoes and bulldozers can help speed this along.

Step 2: Fill the hole with ashes. Any kind will do so long as it's soft enough to cushion the fall into the hole. We don't want to to kill the animal, or cripple it.

Step 3: Buy several pounds of green peas and set them up in piles around the hole in strategic locations where the Elephant will be vulnerable while eating. Elephants enjoy greens, and peas are very cheap and will keep the elephant busy since they lack hands to properly scoop them up.

Step 4: When he goes to take a pea, kick him in the ash-hole

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So what's going to happen with the official imports it's gonna nuke the inflated prices? a fucking xbox one S is way cheaper then the switch here

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Two Japanese employees were eating lunch together. The first one said "The boss is just awful, he's corrupt, he treats us all terribly, and there's nothing we can do about it lest he fire us"
The second one said "Yeah, he's a real 9 + 1"

israel is a terrorist settler state that has no right to exist