Are you still mad, Yea Forums?

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We should should just replace the name easy difficulty with gaming journalist difficulty instead

the only way I could excuse it would be if they were a "specialist" in certain genres and platformers weren't one of them. I know if I had to show up and demo an RTS game that I would be shit because I never play those, so I could see that angle.

I'm extremely doubtful, of course, that this is the case. I only wanted to present the one situation in which I could see this kind of thing being excusable. Of course, I strongly doubt the guy has ever demonstrated competence in another game or genre to prove my possible angle to be anything but a fantasy.

you should see his full 26 minutes of footage, in which he fails to advance beyond half of the first level

This is an unfair comparison. The bird started later than the journo so it was behind.

Nah, there comes a point where you can't be mad anymore because you know it doesn't matter. Nothing changed because of this, and nothing ever will until there's an industry wide crash.
Just pirate everything, watch things get worse, and wait for the end.

JOURNOS

HIRE
THIS
BIRB

Absolutely based pigeon

This is not only being bad at video games, is he fucking illiterate as well? It takes him almost a minute to actually input a dash even though it says right there on screen to DASH.

I like how as you watch this you can see whatever deformed gears exist in his head slowly turn, not without effort, to solve this tutorial. “He figured out that he needs to jump on the box to jump over the pillar, he almost has it!” There was a funny video of a pigeon figuring out how to get a chip hanging from a string above it’s head by using a block to step up from, and the pigeon solved the puzzle faster than this failure got through that part of the tutorial.

BASED

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Got my friend to play dmc before 5 and every time he got stuck he'd spend like 20 minutes whining nonstop and then he opened a youtube video to check the way, he also used a trainer to beat vergil in 3, whenever i mention it to him he gets triggered, but that's on me for having normalfag friends. I mean, i sucks big dicks on games like megaman but at least i'm honest about it.

I remember him only being able to complete the jump when a developer told him what to do. God knows how long he would have been stuck there otherwise.

or just make the first half an hour brain-dead easy and full of popcorn spectacle, like Fallout 4.

Give me 10 (TEN) reasons I should care about what game reviewers/journalists think about a game, how they play or the review scores they give.

did ya one better, here's ten THOUSAND reasons

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t. journo

Whats the context here, missed this, looking forward to the Switch port though

It's looks like she was pressing up to "cancel" crouch, but that's still really bad.

Wasn't it a he?

30 minutes of gameplay preview, and it's a shitshow

"Journalist" that are game-illiterate are scoring your games.

>I could see that angle.
I couldn't, simply because he is staring at the instructions of EXACTLY what to do the whole time. This goes beyond incompetency of a genre, it's full blown incompetency of the most basic of critical thinking skills. And when an employed and published journalist fails to apply the most fundamental part of the single most important aspect of their job - namely critical thinking - one has no recourse but to ask how the industry as a whole can have any merit at all?

Did he even get fired for this?

>game-illiterate
Basic sense illiterate, you mean.
Even my fucking dog knows she needs to jump up on the chair first to gain enough height to jump onto the table.

Interesting. Probably won't dig into it
I think "gamers" give journos way too much shit but at the same time shit like this makes it hard to hold those views
I wish theyd at least say what the players preferences are when it comes to what ever game they are previewing or reviewing
Nintendo Power used to do that and it was really helpful

Animals need to know that kind of stuff to survive in the wild, even if they're domesticated and love a cozy life their instinct still tells them to not be retarded or else they'll die
Meanwhile retards like the journo can unfortunately thrive

Imagine basing your every decision on the smile a character makes instead of the numbers displayed right below it.

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I don't get it.

Gamespot journalist streamed Fire Emblem Fates before release and got everybody killed all at once.

You know what, I change my mind, you are right. See, I forgot that this section even has text. To me, the execution is so bloody obvious that I didn't even have to put conscious thought into it, so I didn't even manage to recognize that text exists on this screen. I can only guess he must have been blind too, but even then, he's just failing at basic thought as you said. No way this is defensible.

And in case you were all wondering, he is still working at the same site, his last article was published today.

Here's a screencap, I went to his shitty website so that YOU don't have to!

Also read the fuckin' bio, this guy is worse than we could have ever imagined.

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Characters have different portraits depending on if they can get hit, killed on the counter, safely kill the opponent, etc. the reviewer only used these portraits which is why she killed saizo at the start(because you can’t easily discern his expression) and why she had Felicia attack an enemy she had no reason to attack.

Why would I be mad? This webm shows what we've all been thinking for years, that video game journalists are a joke. The edit with the bird doing problem solving alongside it makes it even better.
thank you for posting it

he looks like an Asian Jim Sterling

He clearly isn't looking at the combat info the game gives you when deciding to attack

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No, I have no respect for video game journalists in the first place.

>he is still working at the same site
Wow the company is basically saying that this level of incompetency meets the par for journalism

>mad
not at all this shit was hilarious. I especially loved the edit with the pigeon 10/10

Par nothing, it says he is the LEAD WRITER of their Games channel. As in, this guy is their #1 for writing about games. Almost guaranteed it's just because of having the most experience, but it's still fucking sad.

That's the worst part about journos. Not only are they shit, they think it's okay to be shit. Every one of them got their job by knowing the right person and they feel entitled as fuck to that job

>japanese
>bad at games
WTF

I was never mad, just dumbfounded.

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I was never mad. I'm not angry at journos, I'm disgusted by them. Accidentally giving a journo a click is like stepping on dog shit: There's some anger in there, but it's not directed at the dog shit but rather at whoever put that turd in my way and my own lack of awareness that could have easily prevented that situation had I been a little more sharp.

Journos aren't human, they aren't even animals. They are a barely tangible consequence of our reality.

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You have to go out of your way to get a job in this field. Why do you get a job in something that doesn't interest you in the slightest? Did they just grow out of them? I know I did and stopped playing a lot of games, but if it was my job I'd still put 90% into it at least. This is less than 0.

is this an updated tutorial?

based pigeon

They failed to make it as regular journalists, so they settled for the next best thing.

>Dean
Uh huh. He's probably just an asian american.

how can an asian be bad at video games

Mad about what? I thought this shit was hilarious. I hope Cuphead 2 has a joke difficulty setting called "journalist mode" that doesn't actually change the difficulty.

>25 years of experience journo
>couldn’t hit water if he fell out of a boat

it was an oney plays parody of it where they pretend to be stuck on it for roughly 18 minutes before accidently glitching through the pillar

>when you try to dumb down your battle system by hinting the player with facial expressions but you end up making casuals kill their party because they relay on it too much
this is great desu.

The oneyplays cuphead video makes me laugh so hard every time.

I'm mad that he gets fucking paid a living wage to do this, not that he's bad.

If I was dumb enough to have "video game journalist" as my job title I'd be suing this fuck for defamation. This is like if someone who couldn't identify what a keyboard was went around calling themselves a "Computer Engineer."

this. basically game journalists are people who hit the absolute rock bottom, I think for them it was something like this:
>book author
>critique at a serious newspaper
>real journalist
>reporter of some sort
>whether man
>janitor
>blood donor
>sucking dick for meth behind the alley
and after they failed in all the above, they settled for
>game "journalist"

Still not an excuse, see Justin Wong and Thresh.

>So pigeon, what did you think of the new Doom trailer?
>fdjsklfajieqwmnke
>Another great article from the our star game journalist!

>Enemy has 98% hit rate on two attacks that will one shot if chained
>Attacks anyway
>Game tells you your character will do 0 dmg in combat. 0 fucking dmg.
>Does it anyway
Is this one of those bots that learns through trial and error?

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>lead writer
I bet they're really happy they don't have investors

why did i laugh at this

no, it's a preview by a journalist who used the portrait's facial expressions as basis to decide whether or not to attack.

Still a better review than what most journalists give
>learns through trial and error?
More like brute force every obstacle until something works

What killed me was the he had gall to double down on his utter incompetence at the game, and talk down to the video game community as a whole.

Laterally who

some hard to swallow pills for this thread because this topic is always such a shitshow

1) Dean Takahashi received the Cuphead preview well and praised it for its difficulty. He clearly offered a caveat that he was terrible at the game to let people better judge his opinion
2) Dean Takahashi is not the only video game journalist and nobody makes you read his reviews
3) Yea Forums sucks game journalist dick, provided they're immense contrarians

redpilled but also cringe

Garbage rationalization. RTS are some of the most difficult to enter genres in video games. Literal children can play platformers. This person very clearly can't hand multiple button inputs on a controller. The only reason I would think this is excusable is if the person in this clip specializes in reviewing mobile clicker games.

"Okay Stadia, beat this level for me."

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I was never mad. I was bemused at most, but it was fucking hilarious.

>hard to swallow pills
more like shitty excuses after making reviews for 20 years
this video is the proven fact that journos reviewing games don't play the games

There are probably multiple people on here with multiple opinions.

I don't personally read reviews of any medium.

No, because he actually managed to finish the whole game.

Japanese are all uber casual

>A fascinating insider's look at the evolution of the Xbox 360 and Microsoft's ambitious gamble to become a leading force in the multi-billion dollar video gaming industry. Through extensive interviews and unprecedented access, San Jose Mercury News Technology and Gaming Writer Dean Takahashi takes you behind the scenes as he reveals... The birth of the machine as seen through the eyes of the Xbox 360 engineers who designed it... Blow-by-blow coverage of the heated internal debates as senior Microsoft executives battle to define the future of the Xbox brand... The strategic chess moves as Bill Gates, Steve Ballmer, and company take risk after risk, trying to outmaneuver their archrivals for the brass ring: dominance of the incredibly lucrative video game market... Sony, Nintendo, Electronic Arts, the entire Microsoft Xbox 360 team, and the industry's most celebrated video game developers -- all of the major players are included in this captivating story.

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He wasn't reviewing the game, genius. He was previewing a small, pre-release vertical slice. The site he writes for published a full and proper review by a different writer.

The only people dumber than "journos" are people who can't fucking read

1) If a journalist's review comes with the caveat "I am not actually able to accurately participate in the thing I am reviewing," then that review is not a fucking review. It is an admission of inability to do their job.
2) Consumers have a duty to hold industry members to a certain standard. You might as well be telling people not to talk about anything unless they have some unconstructive ass-kissing to shit out.
3) I do not care what shitposters on Yea Forums say. If we are to apply the worst cases to the global userbase, then you should turn yourself in to the police for being a pedophile and a terrorist.

Take your own advice and just shut up since you don't have to participate in the thread.

who said he was reviewing the game, turboretard

I said he's been reviewing games for 20 years, and he can't hardly follow simple directions on the screen
it is very obvious he is just a professional shill, and thinking otherwise only outs you as another shill from the journo scamming industry
fuck you, lad

is there a video of this happening in real time with commentary?
I want to hear the complaining

>3) Yea Forums sucks game journalist dick, provided they're immense contrarians
This.
>if game I like have good score then reviewers good
>if game I don't like have good score then reviews don't matter

>the PlayStation effect

it's real

>the only way I could excuse it would be if they were a "specialist" in certain genres and platformers weren't one of them
He reviewed diving games not platformers

>that essay in the description of the video

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I could play a fair amount of The Witness but I don't know if I would be able to do any better than the person playing in this webm

I came to this thread just to see if someone posted this. My favourite video game webm of all time

That made me think, what exactly makes someone or something based but bluepilled, or cringe but redpilled?

no, the dude was recording at an event

How can one bird be so based.

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I was never mad because I took five minutes to look into why the fuck this could even happen and it's because someone put an old tech journalist in front of a video game. The man never played video games, so the video was a lot less curious in that light. Too bad people just used it to fan the "games journos are human garbage" flames when he wasn't even a games journalist.

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According to Yea Forums you need a PhD in epic gaming to write a three paragraph editorial containing a thought on a videogame

boo resetera shills
kill yourselves

the guy who played a tutorial level like that shold review TV shit or something

absolutely any person who played any game in life would pass that easily

INSTRUCTIONS
ON
THE
SCREEN

Redpilled and bluepilled are about stating true facts or delusions. Cringe and based are about how you state them.
You can be Based but bluepilled and Cringe but redpilled

why didn't the pigeon just fly

>literally wrote about games for 20 years
>HURR HE NOT DA VEEDO GAEM JOURNO
Wow you really showed Yea Forums, good job user.

>absolutely any person who played any game in life would pass that easily
Yeah, your point being what?

I now wonder if DSP has done this game

It's not about being good. Hell, I'm honestly terrible at most game genres, but at least I can follow simple instructions like any normal human being and succeed. This guy, on the other hand, got his monthly check for getting stuck at a fucking tutorial screen.

Because the game industry and its audience have grown exponentially since then. The more people you have in any given group the more idiots you'll have.

>based but bluepilled
"We're all gonna make it bros"
>cringe but redpilled
"erm, sweetie, no. Actually some of you are never going to have a fulfilling relationship in the near future"

Imagine having worse problem solving abilities than a fucking pigeon with his wings tied.

Easiest modes in games should be just called "gaming journalist mode".

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He wrote about tech, not video games. Like holy shit this info isn't hard to find, I did it in minutes. What the fuck agenda are you even trying to push, here? If I can prove you're lying by just doing a google search, what do you think you're going to accomplish by lying in the first place?

The only excuse is stage fright. I've done some retarded things when playing while being watched.

Yes. Theres no shame in being bad at a genre of games, or even games in general, but if youre SO bad that you cant understand a basic jump+button combo, then what the fuck. Its such a simple mechanical input. I know he doesnt play any games but there must be a basic level of competence.

For example, ive never built anything out of wood. Never. But i could still grasp the concept of hitting a nail with a hammer. Now imagine it took me 2 minutes to hit the nail with the hammer, despite the nail being there and the hammer being in my hands. Thats the level of incompetency we're talking about.

God forbid this man ever tries to cross the street, the complex operation of lifting is foot up AND forward at the same time will give him an aneurism

user, If I suddenly started writting to a car magazine for FUCKING TWENTY YEARS MORE THAN TIME THAN YOU HAVE IN THIS EARTH, it would be just fair to assume I already know how to drive. If I don't, maybe people are right to assume I am a fucking cocksucker who have no moral highground to talk about cars.

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goddamn this is still painful to watch every time.
but still, i don't give a fuck how much a rando sucks at any given game.

>bluepilled
You don't flip out when you see niggers and women
>redpilled
Youi flip out when you see non-whites
>cringe
You try to be funny rather than just shitposting

Even then. I absolutely suck as fighting games, but for it to be the same thing, the game would tell me Square is punch, i just stare at it blankly, saying ''......what?''

>3) Yea Forums sucks game journalist dick, provided they're immense contrarians
I haven't read/watched a single game review by a journalist in my entire life
Try again

idk maybe the journalist had a bad day/brain fart. I refuse to believe someone is this bad consistently.

Straight and honest opinion with 0 buzzwords from a bird that actually beat the game. How can west coast "journalists" even compete?

You have no idea. Dean Takahashi's level of incompetence is beyond words.

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>He wrote about tech, not video games.
>...and he has covered games for 21 years.

Now go ahead, user. Prove that the site the guy fucking works for is lying. Not me, but his actual employer. Don't pussy out now, I want to see you put your money where your mouth is.
I could use a good laugh, you absolute failure.

>it would be just fair to assume I already know how to drive.
No it wouldn't.

I was never mad in the first place

>based
You don't give a shit about stuff and act like a real Chad.
>cringe
Your behaviour cause shame when seen.
>bluepilled
You share opinions with the sheeple.
>redpilled
You know the real truth about stuff.

Wrong, kill yourself you fucking nigger tranny.

>rando
He is a gaming journalist, his job is to grade and review games. Games he have absolutelly no idea how to even play, just showing he don't retain the necessary amount of knowledge about it to tell others the value of a game. Someone like him in this position only serves to show how much gaming journalism sucks.

>Wrong, kill yourself you fucking nigger tranny.
Cringe and redpilled

here is the real answer
>based
yikes
>cringe
yikes
>bluepilled
yikes
>redpilled
yikes

Yikes and yikes pilled

yikes

>includes that THQ literally told him to his face that Warhammer is an older franchise that objectively came first
>continues on by implying "it's almost like they were expecting someone to point out that they copied GoW"
This is satire, I refuse to believe otherwise.

Yes it would. Many things you can say about a car, the most important things to a potential buyer, can only be perceived by someone who knows how to drive, and if I gave half a fuck about my job, I would have learned already so I could improve and also talk about this stuff. The same logic can, and should be applied to videogames.

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>ctrl-f
>'bird'
no, i'm still laughing

>admits W40k came first
>immediately describes the differences
>says he's shocked at the copycatting
Is he getting bribes from Microsoft or something? He mentioned it ripping of Halo too.

Unironically cringe

Doesn't surprise me that the same retards who think you don't need to know how to play video games to be a games journalist also believe you don't need to know how to drive to write about cars professionally.

>>>>>>>>>>>>she

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

even then, its the BEGINNING of a fucking PLATFORMER. the only thing he has to do is jump and go right. it literally TELLS HIM TO DO THAT

Here's something else for you to disprove by the way I'm eagerly awaiting the results of your google search.

> webm
DaS/BBfag in Sekiro

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This exactly.

Journalist also had instructions written on the wall. Pigeon didn't.

People will call you elitist for saying this but you're not wrong. The lowest common denominator is real and the decline of this board is a case example of it.

>not posting the bird version

Read the thread idiot

it's funny

Fuck off cum guzzler

Literally this, it doesn't matter that he isn't ""reviewing"" the game, the fact that he is playing the preview when he has no idea how to even follow simple instructions and input the buttons in order is a shame for his company

Meanwhile, in DOOM.....

youtube.com/watch?v=d3pQ0oO_cDE

Damn.. Deep.

[spoilers]NOBODY CARES MOBY[spoilers]

These are the people who think it's "unfortunate" that there are user reviews for games because it's only their EXPERT opinion that should be allowed.

i care fuck yall

vocaroo.com/i/s0OUkXAKXJPw