Why do you guys hate the Altmer?

I like to play a self-loathing Altmer.

The thalmor are right though.

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skyrim

In the Thalmor Embassy quest there's a note that says Ulfric Stormcloak is an "asset." They used him to divide and conquer.

>israelis aren't nazis

They deceived the khajiit by making the moons disappear, then restored them to convince the khajiit to Ally with them. One day my brothers will wake up.

me on the left

>play as an Altmer in skyrim
>can't ally with the Thalmor as a third option to deal with the Civil war
shit game.

I love how they are so butthurt they got conquered by humans and ruled over for multiple millenia. Only the Falmer are more buttmad.

the most you can do is play your part to let the imperials win. Then you can indirectly allow the Thalmor to control the empire
Still sucks

>being weak to magic
Breton master race.

The main storyline is ballsack no matter which race you are.

>Be Nord dragonborn
>"Dude, you have to kill Paarthurnax, he's too dangerous"
>"Just kill the dragon responsible for freeing your ancestors bro"
>"Just kill your mentor that taught you how to defeat Alduin and prevent the destruction of Mundus bro"

No character in any RPG makes me rage as hard as Delphine.

I think the Thalmor win in both scenarios.

>being descended from nede trash

How can I find a big titty yanggang gf?

>TALOS IS REAL YOU GUYS, MUH CORRUPT LYING EMPEROR IS A GOOOOOD

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The Blades are formally dragon slayers. You think the Vigilants of Stendarr also give a shit about how nice a Daedra is?

Elves should want Talos to be a god. Being conquered and put in their place by a normal human man would be infinitely more embarrassing.

>hating the good kind folks trying to educate man barbarians on their heathen folly

Yeah, and they are also sworn to follow the orders of the dragonborn. Guess that part can be conveniently ignored by them though.

ye
i ended up flipping a coin at who would control skyrim at the end of my game
both outcomes are retarded anyway and the best possible scenario is the dragonborne taking dragons into war with those elf fucks

Just get the mod where you tell her you're the dragonborn and her boss and to shut the fuck up, it's integral to the experience. Why the dragonborn has to be this cucked little errand boy in the unmodded version beats me.

I don't

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HAVE YOU HEARD OF THE HIGH ELVES?

You don't even need a mod. Just ignore the quest. That's how you roelplay telling Delphine to fuck off.

I always play with that mod. It just burns me the fuck up that Paarthurnax being murdered by the Last Dragonborn is going to be canon in future games. Fuck the Blades.

TALL ELF MAKE NORD MAD. NORD LOVE TALOS. NORD SMASH ELF.

Better to be safe than sorry.

Nords only hate Altmer because they're used to being the tall guys and Goldenrods make them feel like manlets.

yeah

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*Ahem*

FUCK ALTMER, FUCK BOSMER, FUCK IMPERIALS, FUCK NORDS, FUCK KHAAJIT, FUCK REDGUARDS, FUCK BRETONS, FUCK ORSIMER, FUCK DWEMER, BUT MOST OF ALL

FUCK SWAMPSCUM!

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That is what axes are for.

How are you enjoying your stay in Argonia North?

They recognize that he’s a god, though. They just want to stamp out his worship and eventually erase him from all memory in order to destroy him and thus reality.

STOP

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!

NO!

This is the end...the bitter, bitter *SCHHHHLLRP*

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The higher ups do. The grunts on the ground floor have no idea what the real plan is.

True. The grunts’ motivations are probably closer to “FUCK MEN AND ALL THEIR THINGS”

not made for humans

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Do you think Beth will ever show the Altmer as anything other than mustache twirling villains. I wanna side with them in TES VI and bring about a Mer hegemony and maybe destroy the world.

Well first of all they're elves. That's all I need to know.

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i love balloon tits

Bethesda is bluepilled so as long as Altmer are xenophobic towards other races they will be the bad guys. That's why all the "good" Altmer are residents of the Empire and not the Aldmeri Dominion.

Does anyone think they will let the Thalmor meet their supposed victory conditions and end the series?
No.
Nobody believes that will happen.
The Nords will deal with the merrish threat as they always have.

kinda, the grunts are more excited for holy crusade on all the lesser beings and then a trip to aetherius

same

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So were the Falmer and Eyelids.
How did that turn out?

It's kind of ironic since the Empire are in essence violent conquerers with a full on "Imperial man's burden" ideology behind their actions.

Dunmer can't govern themselves, Nords can't govern themselves etc. Really the Aldmeri dominion is no worse than what the empire was back in it's glory days.

Nords carved out the empire.
The just let the cyrods run it....into the ground.

I don't. Altmer are the misunderstood good guys. Nirn is a world of constant war, suffering and strife. Ending the world is a net positive.

skyrim entirely ruined altmer

Honestly a competent writer could probably justify the Aldmeri dominion's plans and make for an interesting moral dilemma. Also playing as a hero who works towards the literal destruction of the world is a neat concept.

Exactly. Tiber Septim was an unga bunga warmonger. The Empire of the 3rd Era was basically modern day US.

If you eliminate the Altmer you eliminate the problem.

The Nords are very good at removing Mer.
They have tussled with 4 merrish races.
Three of them are gone and the fourth are circling the rain.

If past is prologue the Altmer are in for a rough stretch.

haha what if we just killed all the elves. just as a prank, haha.

>If you eliminate all the elves you eliminate the problem.
FTFY
Praise Reman btw

The ayys at least had the backing of daedra. They couldn't have foreseen the Amulet of Kings coming to fuck their tight elven assholes. The Falmer just went full retard and chimped out on the Atmorans for no reason.

would anyone even notice?

A hero that works towards the destruction of the world is called the villain.

They hinted that the heroes actions in Skyrim may have the opposite effect in the grand scheme of things so being an unwitting bad guy is on the table.

/r/ that armor mod.

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In the Bosmer's case literally no, nobody would notice never mind care.

>tfw no Altmer gf who bullies me for being a barbaric human

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what do sappies taste like?

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Redpill me on the stealth archer meme

Reminder that the only reason argonians have breasts is too attract human mates.

Jokes on them because I'm a foot man

Everything in vanilla Skyrim besides stealth and archery sucks ass.

it is just a meme. i never did stealth archer in my multiple playthrough 5000 hour playtime

tfw no cold lizard pusy

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>dude let me just sit behind you for a second after you previously already saw me lmao
I don't get it.

>A hero that works towards the destruction of the world is called the villain.

Not if it's justified.

Skyim would be better if you just removed the terrible combat altogether and it was purely an exploration based game.

Bananaskin knife ears

Stealth Archery is broken in Skyrim since every character can do it despite not speccing into it.

Sword and board is the only way to play.
Spellbreaker is OP if you go that route.
So be warned it will make the game Morrowind tier easy.

The 5th mainline elder scrolls game's meta progression story questline

Whatever Thanos.

No, there's nothing interesting to see in the game. It's all about the loot and selling the loot.

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thanos is a fuckin idiot who just made things worse

Do they control him or is he just happening to help the thalmors plans

I wish the NZ shooter killed your kind instead

He is convenient for them, but he is not working for them. Basically Ulfric actually believes in his cause which is what the Thalmor wanted.

When you start getting into comic book tier threats you start getting comic book tier thinking.
The should have kept the stories on a smaller provincial scale like Morrowind.

That ship has sailed so oh well.

Elves are primarily for bullying, and maybe a distant second purpose of healing wounds with their weird magic tricks.

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Lazy Slaves

I see the jew comparison now

They just kind of primed him and set him loose to do his own thing. They also do what they can to keep him going.

They make good cockwarmers

>he doesn't want to get bullied by a tall Altmeri woman

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based and danmerpilled

>tfw you learn Talos is actually 3 guys but not really cause they merged dragon ball style after death

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vocaroo.com/i/s0WyC9MTxUzp

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>Cyrodiillian accent
GET OUTTA HERE OUTLANDER
I'M WATCHING YOU SCUM

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its literally a fascist state trying to remove religion from skyrim. the only good elf is a dead elf

>nord and proud

This is what nordgers actually believe

More like
Lorelet and dumb

so what?
the aldmer race is actually objectively superior

Altmer are nice dudes and have every right to be bitter about the lesser races.

Tiber was all CHIM'd up.
He was already everybody but still himself according to C0DA.
The Arcturian Heresy and C0DA are incompatible.
If one is true the other is not.

>C0DA
fuck off MK no one read that shit anyway

C0DA is not canon

There is a fundamental misunderstanding about the journal entry i see again and again. It wasnt saying Ulfric is working for the thalmor. it was saying that the destablization he is causing is good for their them. They want to prolong the civil war as long as possible to weaken the empire and nords but not to have ulfric win. The best choice is to join the stormcloaks and end the civil war quickly.

and kill every elf you find.

So were the
Falmer
Eyelids
Dwemer

They all tangled with the Nords and no longer exist.
The dungmer are circling the drain so you can add them soon.

dirty dumb
altmer scum

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>lower left
Is that supposed to be the Heart of Lorkhan with a sword that definitely isn't Keening stuck in it?

I wanna be mashed betwixt those tits

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Because i am envious of how tall they are

I want an Altmer wife. Kids will be Altmer, so I bet she'd go for it.

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>this woman watches you walk and says she likes what she sees
What do?

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She looks digitade. I don't like digitrade feet.

That outfit seems very vulnerable to the cold. I carry her home and provide her with warmth of my dick.

Tiber Septim was a Breton though

Are those faggots still fighting that giant dwemer mecha?
Dragon breaks are both stupid and cool

kek

Poke its eyes out and ask "How about now?"
Creeps me out when the house pet talks to me.

The Heresy still has fans despite the overwhelming evidence it is wrong?
> What evidence
Literally everything else in game.

They want to end existence because they believe they are gods trapped in the material world and can't get out even if they die. So the only solution is to destroy everything, life and the after.

Not every high elf jives with this notion, but the majority of their government do, and are working towards that end.
Why wouldn't everyone else hate them?

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> Oops I wrote myself into a corner time for a dragonbreak.
They are overused and cheap.
Keep the warp in the west and drop the rest.
Lazy tool of bad writers.

>130 year old Dunmer

*sip* Ahh...Now Vivec, THAT was a city.

Is that canon?
The lore mentions Queen Barenziah got BARB'D so Argonian half breeds aren't too far fetched.

>Lore mentions Queen Berenziah got BARB'D
What now?

en.uesp.net/wiki/Lore:The_Real_Barenziah,_Part_III

>mfw this thread

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What does Sujamma taste like, lads?

How many dragon breaks do you know of that are the result of trying writers trying to fix inconsistencies? Can the existence of a nordic account of the Battle of Red Mountain really make it a dragon break, when nords are known to insist on oral traditions?

Fermented cabbage

Any dragonbreak that isn't the Warp in the West.

Spiced moonshine

Dunmer are doing better than everyone else when Skyrim rolls around

One second
*SNIFF*
Sorry, what were you saying? You have a package for me?

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Lost half their country to the volcano.
Lost the other half to the Argonians
Rely on Nord handouts to stay alive

Oh yeah they are shitting in high cotton.

> Takes your land and dabs on you.

yeah right here *unzips*

they were defeated by the Metal God, not Tiber.

> They were defeated by Tiber's weapons not Tiber.
Is that much COPE even legal?

Like which ones! That's what I'm asking you. Any other referenced dragon breaks in literature in the games were established as dragon breaks not because there were chronicled events that are conflicting with each other, but because an actor in the document claims they were. That the Alessian Order were trying to change the nature of Akatosh wasn't retroactively established as a dragon break because whoops we suddenly have conflicting accounts, it's because the literature relating to it has actors claiming it was a dragon break when there is no reason on behalf of the real writers to establish it as a dragon break.

Tibers armies got their shit pushed in and he couldn't dream of touching Alinor until the Tribunal gave him Numidium.
Numidium was not his Weapon, he just got it shoved up his ass like everything else just conveniently fell into his hands.
Even a trained monkey could have conquered Tamriel with the amount of bullshit fiat Tiber recieved.

Post qt dunmeri images/screenshots

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That went from very lewd to very cute really quick.
That graphic prose at the beginning is really good holy shit

(((elves)))

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They're a manifestation of /pol/ except with better hygiene and physique

This thread is now an Argonian thread.

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They want to destroy the universe don't they?

It's a gnostic type deal, they believe that mortal existence is infinitely more limiting and filled with suffering compared to pre-mundus spirits floating in magic astral land (which is what they are trying to bring back)

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Based anti-gnosticism poster

The inner circle within Thalmor does, the rest of altmers are just elven supremacists. I wouldn't mind to see second merethic era under Aldmeri Dominion rule where Thalmor falls from grace and it's just reverse human empire with elven overlordship over Tamriel. Humans in TES deserve some humility until they stop fighting among themselves like bickering children and get their shit together.