If you were Shinji what would you have done differently?

If you were Shinji what would you have done differently?

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Kill Gendo

I would have gone home in episode 1 and let Rei pilot the Eva

arson maybe

Smack some sense into those bitches

gotten therapy and/or anal sex

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Sex Asuka

The point of the series is that he couldn't have done anything different. When he was finally given a true choice to make, the series ended.

if i were shinji, shinji would no longer exist, it would be me. so i would do everything differently, because it is me

Probably would have died on the first angel idk

Rebuild shinji is literally me

The only thing I would have handled better than him is Asuka. If I somehow managed to survive long enough to even get to that part of the story

Not paid any attention to weird emotional drama.
Piloted my robot while maintaining a strictily professional relationship with people around me.
Demanded extraordinarily good pay.
Died somewhere along the line but hey that's how it goes.

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With the experience and social skills of a 14 year old I probably would have done all the same things in the same order. And if I retained any memory of my past life I'd probably make an offhand comment about always falling for the exact same whore and ending up in the same conversation with her.

You got big tiddie gf?

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>I would have gone home in episode 1 and let Rei pilot the Eva

I'd fuck Kaworu and convince him to LIVE

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Dicked asuka and rei

Mine really put the violent in tsundere.

>I'd still get in the robot to save Rei
>Hope my meta knowledge lets me do better then Shinji did in the fights.
>If not I die I guess but that's boring so lets prepend I live
>Surviving takes priority over Toji's little sister but if I can avoid it I would.
>If I don't I'll be keeping my eyes out for that punch and at least get a hit in back.
>Try to get Rei out of her shithole apartment.
>Me knowing why Asuka is fucked, I would try to be there for her however I can.
>I wouldn't clean up as much after Misato shes a grown ass woman and I've been around enough functional alcoholics in my first life.
>Not stress as much about Gendo being shit.
>I'd try a little harder to convince that silver haired faggot fuck to not do his angel bullshit and just hang out on earth a little longer.
>I'm not good at long plans to "fix everything" I'd just do what I feel is best in each moment as they come along and hope for the best.
You might enjoy that YT link

got some bitches on my dick fr fr

I'd have fucked off after seeing the eva without the face plating
No way I'm coming back from that

Have loving parents

Tbh, not much different. Whole point of the show is that this insecure 14 year old is coerced into piloting a robot or everyone dies. Maybe be more assertive against Asuka and try to get Rei out of her shell more. Also stop dwelling on a dad as shit as Gendo.

Corrective rape on Asuka.

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Have sex with Misato.


Sex Rei

You two are a better fit for a different agency.

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rape asuka instead of jizzing on her chest

I would have put on the suit, killed everyone and then shot dead myself.

>go into turbo autism mode
>destroy nerv
>kill lilith
>go home and play vidya

If I'm limited to information Shinji had, I can't imagine not confronting dad after I remember how mom died and that I'm in the same robot. I think I could negotiate by that point, too, because that would also be after I've been proved vital to operating Eva-01 in any way.

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Teach Rei how to do the Fusion Dance in our Evas before every fight, just to piss off Gendo.

Depends, do I have the same information that Shinji has or do I have all the information I do now.
If I had Shinji's information, I don't think I would have done things all that different to be honest. I likely would have just followed orders and secluded myself, its what I do now anyway.
If I had the information I do now though, things would be different. I would try and negotiate some kind of deal with Gendo. I could always lie and say that I "linked" with the eva and got its memories, Gendo wouldn't know enough to call my bluff and regardless I would still know things. The end goal in this scenario would be keeping everyone alive I think. Try and prevent SEELE from breaking down Misato, Rei, and Asuka by keeping everyone safe and taking the brunt of the work myself. Of course, the problem with changing the timeline is that the more I do it, the less power I have. My ace in the hole is that I know the future, so the more I change it the worse off I am. But if I can keep everyone together mentally, we should be able to fight off the MPE's and in doing so prevent the Third Impact. Somewhere along the way I would become the de facto leader of NERV.
I would also fuck Rei a LOT

>lol you think you can lure me in with girls?
>fuck you dad you a bitch go pilot it yourself if you want to so badly bitch nigga
and then i go home and apply to an actual school and get a social life

Hang out more with Kaji, he seemed like a much better influence on Shinji than Misato.

yes, much better influence

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uhhh based

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Work out instead of cry, fuck Asuka and forget about my overbearing father and Rei. That or get drunk with Misato and knock her up and make Kaworu my downlow onahole

Call Asuka the whore of babylon to piss her off. Then do it out of affection once she gets used to it.

Had sex with Misato when she offered. Everything else would be pretty much the same.

Probably tossed the letter from Gendo in the trash and carried on with my life.

>Everything else would be pretty much the same.\

Including nearly killing Touji with the Dummy Plug? Dick move, my man,

I wouldn't get in the fucking robot

Move in with Rei
Cook for her everyday
Make her fat

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What? Gendo did that not Shinji.

Gendo did it because Shinji refused to engage.

Weird shit. Kaji's just a normal, well-adjusted person without much baggage beyond working in a dangerous field.

Kowaru would've ended the world if I even managed to get that far.

Fuck Kaji.
Fuck Kaworu.
Fuck the Eva.
I'll just rub my dick over everything.

Sex Kaworu

Why? Just decapitate his head.

Given my problem at this age was cocksure overconfidence I'd probably have smashed up the EVA and/or been fired for trying it on with Ritsuko...

...although, all things considered, I wouldn't much mind spending eternity in the endless tang orgy elysium either

He literally flirts with Shinji in Rebuild

Fucked the shit out of Asuka like she clearly wanted.

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Every time I get people's attention, use the opportunity to spout horrible memes.
Act in the exact manner of a compulsive liar, making sure to always be factually correct.
Make up conspiracy theories and sell other characters on them. Again I'd make sure it's all makes sense, but it's so on the nose no one would ever buy it.
When Asuka starts her act, always ask for more amd push her buttons. Insist that we've already had this conversation before.
Pretend to know a bunch of languages I can't actually speak.
Walk around in a lab coat claiming I'm a mad scientist. Demand access to the labs so I can assist.
Whenever people suspect I'm doing something manipulative, take out my phone and loudly talk to myself.
Insist on wearing a labcoat over a plugsuit while piloting. Make sure to always have replacements when people take it away by force. After losing several labcoats this way, reveal that I have one hidden in my pants for emergencies and do a literal asspull.

>Act in the exact manner of a compulsive liar, making sure to always be factually correct.
What would this entail

I would have fucked Asuka while she was comatose. That's the only difference though.

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Make people guessing what your deal is. I can have a long monologue about bananas or start talking about how misato was the first pilot and there was an entry plug on the south pole. Maybe I'm harmless until I'm not.

Shit if the kid asked that direct of a question and got slapped and hated for it, I don't imagine I could have done any better.

Based Steins chad

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now that's one daring synthesis

I'd have drilled Asuka and make her call me daddy.

I fear heights so there is no way in hell Nerv could put me inside those building sized robots. Fuck the world, anyway.

>He literally trolls Shinji in Rebuild

>fuck asuka and misato
>flip my dad off
>joyride with the eva
>be best friends with kaworu

>Make people guessing what your deal is

Coach Harbaugh as an Eva pilot?

Based S;G schizo

what do you mean, thats edited

Oh so when I ask 14 year old boys on date I'm a pedophile but when Kaji does it he's a troll?

Fucked Asuka.

Unlike you, it's clear Kaji was just fucking with Shinji.

Fuck Asuka

I don't know user I don't think this would hold in a court of law

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You forgot Misato.

I see 2 other anons already said something like this but: this is the vaguely S;Gish x NGE crossover I have only dreamed of.
writefag something I'm begging you.

Well I'm already working on a novel in my free time but it's not a fanfic and doesn't have any anime tropes. Maybe I insert a mad scientist seeing how many people reacted to that post.

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This Everyone wants Kaji's chad dick. You would just be creepy.

I'd tell people from the 90s about how people communicate and treat each-other in 2022. They'd either consider me to be completely insane or start working on that gestalt right away while there's still time.

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Gestalt was a mistake

I'm the opposite of based. I lost someone I cared about and haven't been able to replace her.

Take Misato's virginity

I kill myself so the Angels win, and I never have to deal with Asuka or Gendo.

Every girl in my class. Also just go unconscious during fights so Unit 01 does it for me. Mother knows best and all that.

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Fuck Asuka

>BTFO the angels as a team
>BTFO sachiel without Toji's little sister getting hurt
>secure asuka gf
>BTFO the military and EVA series with peak Asuka
>expose NERV/SEELE bullshit with Misato's evidence
>completely purge all NERV/SEELE work, studies, data, Magi, EVA but keep all the technological advancements that don't depend on the MAGI or take away world jobs
>bear children with Asuka in our new utopia

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Take control of instrumentality and force Gendo to watch me fuck Yui for all of eternity.

Boy just needs a strong figure in his life.

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Bone teh Rei, disregard uppity redheads, bone Lilith, disregard silver-haired faggots, use the 3 Magi to run hyperrealistic 3D renders of various angels banging and display the results directly into the NERV command center.

Probably I'd end up dying midway or earlier if I'm being realistic