Everyone talking about king crimson succking bucciarati for the arrow

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Not asking about how having multiple personnalities is supposed to somehow change your skeletal structure as you switch between them huh

It just works.

I hope so but sort of doubt it

Would you, Yea Forums?

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I would

Giorno, did I ever tell you about your actual biological dad, Jonathan Joestar? You see, back in the late 1800s Dio Brando was some whiny, little blonde twink who killed his father Dario Brando, and was adopted by a wealthy man named George Joestar and raised as his son alongside his own biological son Jonathan. But because he was evil, rather than growing old in the lap of luxury, he decided that he would murder George, Jonathan, and their beloved dog Danny. He accomplished this by using strange stone mask that George had bought for his wife, who died in a carriage accident when Jonathan was just a baby, to turn himself into a vampire. Fortunately, Jonathan met a wandering hermit dressed like a pimp that taught him how to harness sunlight/life energy into Karate. Unfortunately, because Jonathan was also cursed with retardation, he never bothered checking to see if Dio was dead after their many encounters. This culminated in Dio’s severed head attacking Jonathan on a honeymoon cruise he was taking with his wife Erina, finally finishing him off for good. Upon doing so he attached his severed head onto Jonathan’s dead body and decided to lay dormant in a coffin at the bottom of the ocean for nearly 100 years. The exact same coffin that Erina used as a makeshift lifeboat to escape, somehow.

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with short hair, baka

Oh, did I mention that vampires can Frankenstein the pieces of multiple living organisms together? Dio did this one time prior by attaching a man’s head onto a dog for seemingly no real reason. Anyways, after laying at the bottom of the ocean for a century Dio decided that he wanted to destroy the entire Joestar bloodline, which he knew still existed because he was also able to use Hermit Purple, the stand of Jonathan’s grandson Joseph, which has divining power. This was initially because Dio’s Stand was supposed to have the power of all Stands, but Araki later retconned this into the Hermit Purple actually being Jonathan’s Stand because “the power of all powers” is a really fucking lame cop-out ability for a villain that’s nearly impossible to write around. Regardless, his goal to destroy the Joestar bloodline seemed incredibly short-sighted considering he fucked your whore of mom with Jonathan’s cadaver dick, which if you think about it is like Jonathan cuckolding him from beyond the grave.

But that’s all beside the point, being me teaming up with Jonathan’s descendants Joseph Joestar and Jotaro Kujo, my best friend who has a daughter that will become extremely relevant about a decade from now, unlike you. We travelled across the world to get to Egypt, fighting several colorful characters who worshipped Dio, and we defeated them all, except for a gay, mulatto priest who didn’t get the memo to show up. Anyways, I should probably tell you about how powerful Dio had become in those 100 years, despite somehow forgetting all his vampire powers. Which brings me to The World. It was a good Stand.

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>Unfortunately, because Jonathan was also cursed with retardation, he never bothered checking to see if Dio was dead after their many encounters
Dio fell down a cliff, with Hamon consuming his entire body. It would have been very hard to find him, even if they were able to go down the cliff. Also, his entire body was burning. Jonathan didn't have any way to know that, in this world, someone can survive from having 3 severed limbs and massive bleeding, and then falling to a rock in the bottom of a cliff, and somehow survive. By the way how in hell did you get out of that rock the boss left you?

>it is like Jonathan cuckolding him from beyond the grave.

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Haha DIO IS A KEK