What would sex with Asuka be like?

What would sex with Asuka be like?

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>sample

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Shit.

Be a wild ride of her angrily having her way with you.
Not very romantic, but you won't miss that part.

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a poor man's misato

Illegal.

I feel like she'd start crying in the middle of it and it'd get really uncomfortable.

>189685322
who'd fuck a vegetable?

You aren't attractive enough to ever experience it, OP.

Cute and happy

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Hot

It would probably be a horrible sex life, and maybe and ugly life as a couple too.
She's too hysterical, and I can see her as the type that can start crying during sex, and probably have mood swings at any moment. If that's shit for anyone, imagine Shinji who has his own baggage to carry. Something like that could work in fiction, but in real life it would be breeding grounds for a very toxic relationship.

Not saying Rei would be a much better partner, by the way.

very nice once she is 18

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>waiting until 18
She'd be busted up by then. Got to get them while they're young and clean.

Age 17 Asuka is perfect

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Not in Germany :^)

She wouldn't know what to do, would try to be super aggressive and in control, but not know what she's doing and eventually just let the other person do it for her.

Don't know where all the angry wild sex posts are getting that from her personality. She's a hyper emotional scared kid who acts big to compensate.

Everyone's treating sex with Asuka like it'd be with end of series mentality basket case Asuka. Healthy Asuka (let's say post-Episode 15 if Shinji had reciprocated her advances) would be more like , albeit with warped amusement instead of anger.

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Inferior to sex with Rei
/thread

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But that would make a you a motherfucker.

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very awkward and uncomfortable. followed by half hour of crying

>implying Rei would do anything during sex other than lay there like a dead fish while blankly staring at the ceiling.

>very awkward and uncomfortable. followed by half hour of crying
How on earth would that happen, just stop having sex

>a poor man's misato
kek

That's probably good enough for 99% of anons on here. But would she do butt stuff?

>But would she do butt stuff?
She's German, so yes

If you made it an order, yes.
Not like it would matter to her in terms of practicality, she is infertile either way.

>she is infertile
THAT'S IT. I'M SHUTTING THIS ALL DOWN, WHERE'S THIS "ANNO" GUY?

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Wouldn't be the first time you put your penis inside your mom

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Asuka is too bitchy to be a good lay, Rei is objectively better. Also, you dont ever have to cuddle or put up with her bullshit

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>implying cuddling with Asuka or listening to her pillow talk is a bad thing

Suck my balls kid

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>wanting to deal with Asukas trainloads of baggage
Whatever homo

>misato good asuka bad

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>get to listen to a female be an actual person with real issues and shit that i can be emotionally invested in and appreciate and not a swappable, boring nothing of a human being with a dick insertion plug

Name one thing wrong with this

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>Name one thing wrong with this
You would eventually hate dealing with her bullshit, thats why Rei is infinitely better. Asuka is a dumb and a broken bitch

>you would eventually hate

If I get to make her even a little happier in the long run it would have been worth it and more, better to deal with bullshit with a positive resolution over a soulless, meandering relationship with Rei

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It would be just fine until she has a dream one night that you cheated on her, and cuts your dick off while you're asleep.

As if she would want to get rid of my baloney pony

I think you just have ADHD cause your head is so empty

It would be illegal. Stop jerking off to 14 year olds.

you're not going to hear about how she thinks its her fault her mom killed herself and how she feels totally inadequate, which would give you the opportunity to love her and support her until she learns to love herself, she's going to proxy that off onto surface level issues so you're actually going to hear about how she thinks the class rep is annoying and secretly conspiring with rei.

>just be nice to her bro xD
Ah great it's mr. white knight

Shut up Anno, go release 4.0, stinky.

This

are you newfags?

Yeah and then being in a relationship that's intimate on at least some level I'd be able to know her enough to read past that and try and get to the heart of the problem, which would work because I'm not a spineless little twat like Shinji and can put up with some shit to get to it.

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I find it interesting that Asuka wears this boring green dress for her date that was set up for her and she bailed on, every other outfit she wears shows more skin.

user, even if someone falls in love with you doesnt mean you can "fix" them

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Obviously, but it's also just as flawed to be on the complete opposite end and think you can't do jack. Can I completely solve everything wrong with Asuka? Fuck no, but it's highly unlikely I end up completely failing at inciting any sort of positive change in her.

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Wet and pissy.

I'm pretty sure AOC would have been abolished after the 2nd Impact.

do guys not like cuddling?

Rei vs Asuka is like cats vs dogs

Cats literally don't do shit to show affection, are boring and follow the motion of the ocean while waiting for you to give them food.

With a dog you have to put in the work to establish a healthy relationship with it so it doesn't shit on your floor or piss on your shorts, but the pain and suffering you go through makes the real actual affection it shows for you even better.

Basically, Reifags are submissive fags who don't want confrontation in their life. Sad!

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Sounds suffocating desu

>YOU IDIOT, YOU PUT IT IN TOO SUDDENLY YOU'LL CUM TOO FAST IF YOU DO THAT AND I WON"T FEEL ANYTHING!

She'd probably like pegging.

This sounds like the opposite.
I had to put in a lot of work to take care of my cats and make sure they don't piss all over the place.
It was worth it because they were the most affectionate cats I have ever had. One was loyal until he passed away by my side.

You gay

Have you ever had a dog before to compare? I've had both and imo the end-game you have with a healthy relationship with your little mutt is 20x more fulfilling than with any cat.

sounds comfy desu

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>be 14
>have qt gf
>get really into an anime called evangelion
>talk to gf about my favorite character asuka
>tell her she's just like asuka
>call her asuka sometimes
>she for some reason gets mad
>tell her she's just like asuka again
>she gets even madder and stop's talking to me
>weeks pass with very little contact
>invited to big party by an alpha who I had never talked to before
>try to call gf to invite her but she never responds
>go to the party anyway
>have a good time talking about eva and asuka
>everyone is laughing at my jokes and whatever else I say
>get a little worried when I realize I'm the only one talking
>I change the subject to something more normal and everything if fine for awhile
>late into the party I notice I haven't seen the alpha guy around
>ask about him
>"do you really wanna know, user?"
>"yeah?"
>"Let's go see him then"
>lead down the hallway to a closed door
>some guy opens the door
>see alpha guy fucking my gf
>his dick is alot bigger than my, it was like 3 and a half inches
>he looks at me and smiles
>she just giggles
>"is this something asuka would do?"
>to hurt and aroused to answer
>watch them for a little while before running away
>cry like a bitch
>constantly made fun of for being a cuck
>escape into anime
>turn 15
>find a website called 2chan
>become inspired to create my own 2chan
>call it… Yea Forums

Won't forget moot

Like a 7-1

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only after they cum

Its called a healthy aversion

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based

Asuka won't reek of booz or smoke up the room when you finish, so Misato auto loses there for me

what would sex be like?

micromanaged

That’s the best part tho

You'd have to do all the work and she'd be thinking of Kaji the entire time while she says it was the worst sex she ever had

Probably still worth it

she'd probably be pretty submissive in bed. probably likes getting choked and he hair pulled and what not

>implying MUH PRIDE/SELF-IMAGE Asuka would be a bottom bitch in bed

Fat chance

R.I.P. Chris Poole. The Fahter of 9gag

It would not be pleasant and quite hard as she isn't real, so you'd be having sex with a screen.

i have a cat and a dog, do i get to have both?

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Don't you ever get tired of jerking off to Asuka?

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This lemon completely ruins me and I wish I never saw it

mediaminer.org/fanfic/c/neon-genesis-evangelion-fan-fiction/caught-in-the-act/49134/143967

She corners you by surprise in a massage parlor wearing a cheongsam and an eyepatch before giving you a nuru massage and riding your balogna pony into oblivion.

user, is that what i think it is?

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First time I've kekd to a carlos post.

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Why is it that the only cute images of rei come from not the show? Is it cause I’m the show she’s a creepy puppet uncanny valley looking ass? Probably.

haven't yet

Probably shit, she'd demand too much and do nothing

No user you can only choose one, and I already know you would choose your little fucking mutt

DELET THIS
Its crap written by a faggot coping with his jewdick and pozcock.
>(((circumcized)))

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>tfw just want to give Asuka a hug and feel bad everytime I fap to her

why bros, she's my wayfu

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it wuldnt matter whenever i start fucking i start farting a lot i cant help it stop laughing at me why

>Jacking off is treating the girl like an object
>Feel bad about jacking off to Asuka because you're emotionally attached to her and don't like thinking of her as/reducing her to an object

If you clench your fist for a minute straight it gimps the urge to jack off

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>tfw Rei fags think they are actually people and not subhuman incels

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Do you think he would be a Reifag?

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honestly yes

yea most likely

Billy would 110% be a Kaji-fag tho

Breathtaking.

Billy said once on twitter he's straight though.

he's bi bro

Like penis in vagina.

Unless you're a girl then vagina on vagina.