T W O Y E A R S W O R T H

How did the helmets kill them anyway, microwaves or something?
Was there really no way to quickly tear the helmet off?

Everytime I look at this I this pic I think the drain she is leaning on is track from a model trainset.

>doujin where they chop up the girls and keep them

If you can cum roughly 10mL a day, and two years worth went in her, that's 7.3 liters of semen. That's roughly two large milk jugs, or the displacement of a Camaro Z28 engine.

GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP GLOP

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Asuna is the perfect rape bait

Wasn't it a electric charge that fried their brains?
I am pretty sure there could have been a way to just destroy the helmet and its circuitry almost instantly.

Kayaba was just several years ahead of the world's tech; what a guy

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What I wonder is where why there are never any groups trying to break the OS? There are for every system IRL, from chinese firms looking to make chips they can sell so you can play pirated games, to fans who are trying to break region locks. Sometimes they don't succeed until after the system has passed from relevancy, but the switch was cracked within months of coming out.

Only collectible waifu girls like idols or botes are acceptable as rape bait

well to be fair, the switch exploit is an exploit was not inherently nintendo's fault but nvidia's. fusee-gelee is an exploit in the tegra architecture and this was found by a couple of autists. Assuming large governments and/or large corporations are actively trying to crack something, it'd be even faster than a couple of months. Hell, if the SAO universe had a world outside of video games with real humans who aren't incompetent, everybody would be out within a couple of weeks.

What's the longest (since you were 16) you've gone without jacking it Yea Forums? My record's probably 35 days or so when I did a no fap month

Does she have pinchable cheeks?

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You'd think they'd be able to just slide some kind resistant material up in the area it blasts microwaves/shocks/whatever and yank the things off, but I guess there's not much of a premise then

the better part of two months or so, maybe three?
not jacking off isn't a very difficult task really

Air Force basic training.

It's not rape if it's a nurse(male)

Is it rape if it's an administrator (female)?

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The AF in your country has their own basic training? We just did the same as the Army and Navy. But yeah, didn't fap for 13 weeks in basic.

>the displacement of a Camaro Z28 engine
That's oddly specific but thanks for the thought of fueling a car with a dick

In the US, it's separated. Every branch has their own focus and length.

Unleashing that much semen into a girl must feel amazing

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No, Eugeo is so lucky

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>you will never glop endlessly into this
Why live

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Damn user, did you get that "thing" they give to all the male recruits too? My libido slowed down but it came back with a vengeance near the end

kirito is so lucky

>ywn be a dark skinned hentai male with a 5 second refractory period who can cum 100mL at a time
God just imagine how amazing it must feel to have a constant surge of hot jizz push through your member.

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i mean it probably hurts realistically speaking
if i jerk it more than once a day my cock is gasping for air

Yes. Maybe it's something they put in the food, but I think it's just because of sleep deprivation and exhaustion. I was responsible for cleaning the drill pad. Not as bad as latrine duty, but it was still pretty crappy because it took a while and could only be done after everyone else had retired to the dorms. That meant that most of the laundry folding and prep for next day had to be done during lights out. That meant you got less sleep (and they only give you around 6 on a normal day) which means you slip up more often and you and everyone else on pad crew get a reputation as being the squadron fuckups and potential blanket party candidates. So yeah, didn't have time or energy for libido.

>tfw no asuna gf

im gonna kms

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That's the magic of being a hentai rapist. You can just cum and cum and cum and cum all day and somehow never run out or stop feeling good. You can fire sperm directly through the cervix until their wombs are so full of cum that their bellies start to bulge. I don't know if it'd be better to be one or be under one.

I know that feel, a few friends of mine got in trouble for some stupid shit, so I decided to help them out with their extra duty (guy and girl so they couldn't be left alone)
But I found that there wasn't any truth to the hazing or blanket party rumors, just a scare tactic, especially with the liberalization of the military sphere anyway
Don't worry about anyone else anyway, chances are they're retarded to their opinions are by extension just as retarded

Wait, did they use the same murder helmets for the VR games that came after SAO?

It's funny watching Yea Forums completely sperg out on SAO during the Toonami airings even for episodes that are and Yea Forums knew were absolutely kimochii.

>tfw still no asuna wife

Don't worry user, I'm sure you'll find her Asoona.

No the IP rights were acquired by another company who made a significantly lower power version with a fuckton of safeguards. This is a major fucking plot point in the second half of the first season and beyond. Do you people even pay attention to the show or do you just think "hehe I'm going to point out a plot hole that I'm sure is there even though I haven't bothered to check. Because everyone says this series is bad right? So all my nit-pics must be true and everyone on the internet will praise my big brain!"

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it could''ve just been a question, user...

>Actual nipples
Is the show really like this?

It has just been ages since I saw the series, mate.

The movie, yes
The show, unfortunately not

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Can someone give me a quick rundown on the 2 years of semen meme? Also what does the real Asuna look like?

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>Asuna is child predator
Who would have thought

Kirito and Asuna are stuck in Aincrad/SAO for 2 years. During this time, Kirito never faps or has sex so when he finally marries and fucks Asuna he unleashes a massive amount of semen into her cervix. Real Asuna looks the same as SAO Asuna, because everyone was forced to look as they do in real life in that game.

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They never fucked while on vacation at that cabin by a lake?

That was still in the game

So, when you jizz in the game, you don't jizz in real life?

Ah, the old VLR solution.
Just stick some tinfoil between it and you so it can't kill you.

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Apparently not
I mean, that'd generally be considered undesirable right, imagine if you wanted to fuck someone ingame and you had to be like 'hold on I gotta log out for a minute and put my dick in a sock or something so I don't mess up my pants' - I think they'd fix that sort of thing in early alpha
Imagine the patch notes for that

was this scene really necessary

It's really just insane to think nobody thought of a completely mechanical solution over the course of two years, but to care about that sort of thing is the same as taking an isekai seriously. Never played that game in your pic though.
If I had to play the devil's advocate and argue in favor of them not doing anything, I suppose they could have been treating it like a hostage situation, and thought he'd just start killing people randomly if they were pulling them out safely

Probably the same technology that lets players feel stuff when they get hit in-game and co-opting the senses so you don't feel hungry when your meat-body wants food.

Also think about this scenario:
>Kirito laying on his bed in his pajamas playing some VRMMO with Asuna
>Little sister Suguha comes in to check on him
>Kirito's dick starts poking up out of his pajama bottoms until he's fully erect as Suguha watches in horror and fascination
>Semen glops endlessly onto Suguha's face and tits

There's doujins with that.

>as Suguha watches in horror and fascination
>in horror
please, she'd be riding his dick all day long

>samsungs fold phone

Absolutely

Holy shit what a virgin monologue.

Quick Tip: If you find yourself asking whether or not the scene was really necessary... it was.

>those facial expressions
Why is she so detailed compared to all the other girls?

Isn't she the character with most of NTR douijinshis. Many of them are epic.

She was walking sex in the movie.

wow make up really changes a person, huh

silica & yuuki the cutest

2 seconds

love her

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It is for me, I get spontaneous erections if I don't masturbate every day and if I get one of those at work I could get fired for impropriety.

>tfw I'm a male nurse
I would never, how dare you suggest that I would consider such perverted behaviour.

why do things like this make me wish i was a girl
am i just that upset with how ugly i look

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Probably yes.
You're likely just frustrated that you're unattractive and since you find girls attractive, your mind associates the two and makes you think those thoughts.
Just remember that cutting your penis off will not make you more attractive to anyone, in fact it will do the opposite.

don't worry i'd never cut my cock off. i'm at least somewhat happy im a dude despite my curiosities.
thanks user.

The two years thing happened while they where in the game. The cabin by the lake was still in game, and happened after that. Yes they fucked some more while there.

The whole general sequence went:
-Asuna’s stalker nearly succeeds in murdering Kirito before Asuna saves him and they kill the stalker.
-Afterwards Kirito comforts Asuna who is distraught over the incident by kissing her, then accidentally basically propositions her for sex by saying he wanted to spend the night with her.
-they go back to her place, misunderstandings eventually ensue due to Kirito not knowing that there was a way to have sex in game, and sticking his foot in his mouth by saying stupid things.
-misunderstandings resolved, they have sex anyways, two years, glop, etc.
-Kirito proposes (in game) marriage and taking a vacation by buying a nice cabin he knows of on one of the lower floors and living there. Asuna accepts.
-Buy cabin, get married in game, have more sex and relax for a while.

I didn't think my dick could get harder until I saw what looked like her asshole being censored.

>Standing up with your only contact to ground being your toes on the edge of a wet bathtub
I don't see what could go wrong there.

I bailed out of SAO threads when the first half of Alicization finished so I would like to ask, is anyone here excited for Alicization Lycoris? The fact that it could possibly not take place in the gameverse really killed any hype I could have for the game.

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>Damn user, did you get that "thing" they give to all the male recruits too?
It's literally just the physical and mental stress user. Dumb fucks started making up saltpetre rumors because they don't understand how their own dicks work.

It's almost as if a 16 year old virgin who has never actually played MMOs on a meaningful level or interacted with a member of the female sex wrote a novel on the internet with MMOs, romance, and wish fulfillment as its central themes.

The fact it looks like it is mimicking the anime so closely is troublesome. Shouldn't Eugeo be an Integrity Knight at the very start of the game since he was introduced as one in Hollow Realization?

Kawahara wasn't 16 years when he wrote SAO, and he wasn't a virgin either.

cursed image

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>2 years
>couldnt come up with a way to destroy electric circutry

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There're side stories on SAO called "Sulgary Days". It's about the time when Kirito and Asuna spend their two weeks of honeymoon in that cabin on 22th floor. In these stories, Kirito and Asuna had quite a lot of sex and it's consider canon on SAO franchise.

Because she is the best

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Yeah. Only the explicit sex scene in 16.5 isn't considered canon. For obvious fucking reasons.

>and if I get one of those at work I could get fired for impropriety.
>user, please come over here for your surprise erection inspection

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Wasn't it stated that Lycoris isn't part of the Gameverse and more of a straight Adaptation?

BASED

Very disappointing

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Is she an exhibitionist?

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What do you think?

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>who has never actually played MMOs on a meaningful level

Where the fuck did this meme originate from? Because I keep seeing people who are obviously fucking children whose only experience with MMOs came in the post-WoW era parrot it. Kawahara has said in interviews he played a METRIC FUCKTON on Ultima Online in the late 90s. And when he wrote SAO in 2001/2002 he based Aincrad on it and Wizardry and not not the game that would come out in the future of 2003. As someone who also spent thousands of hours in the late 90s/early aughts playing UO, DAoC, EQ1, and SWG, reading SAO does't make me go "this person doesn't understand MMOs" it makes me nostalgic because he is referencing the games I was in love with before Blizzard poisoned the genre forever and created a legacy of unending clones and an entire generation of shit-for-brain kids who think "This is what MMOs are supposed to be"

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>Where the fuck did this meme originate from?
I'm assuming ecelebs

Based MMO vet

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Why are Yuiposters always so high IQ?

>tfw nurse
>it's not the most glamorous job ever but it's what i wanted to do and it pays well, plus i get to help people
>get a huge influx of patients comatose from this weird video game thing
>they all need to be monitored so they start assigning nurses to watch them
>my entire job literally just becomes taking care of this scraggly, emo-looking middle schooler
>this is all I do for two years
>cleaning up after this fucking kid
>suddenly
>a fucking geyser erupts from his pants
>a fountain of youth endlessly drowns the hospital room in a cascade of white
>did he just
>did he just fuck someone in the game
>oh god
>it's everywhere
>GLOP
>that sound overpowers my senses
>GLOP
>it's filling up the hospital room
>GLOP
>I could have been a politician
>GLOP
>I could have had a family
>GLOP
>I could have-
>GLOP

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Too bad LNs about MMOs never truly represent what happens in MMOs.

IMAGINE

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I C H I M A N N E N

Please user, I dont have time to jerk to that doujin again

>What's the longest (since you were 16) you've gone without jacking it Yea Forums?
9 years. I was never into masturbation really until a particularly bad breakup and now it's a daily habit like everyone else

>Whore of Babylon

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Prove it, OP.

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Made for NTR gangbangs with hundreds of middle aged men that are two to three times her age.

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fucking delete this right now !!

No!!!

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Stop being such faggot, user. It's time to be a Man.

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>665
Close, Satan

Seriously, though. Why is there so much NTR?

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ok, I'll give you plothole if you want one
why didn't Asuna die IRL in Kirito vs whathisname duel?

Because there is actually a 5 minute or so delay between avatar death and IRL brain frying, This is why the Resurrection item he fought the evil Santa for to try and bring back Sachi even worked: it *could* restore a dead player but only "if used within X seconds" of their avatar dying. Which is why he couldn't use it to revive Sachi who had died months earlier. However he beat Heathcliff within the buffer time before Asuna's brain got fired IRL so Kayaba just cut the system off and she didn't get microwaved in recognition of his loss.

And before you follow up with "b-but if there is a 5 minute delay why don't people in the real world just pull the Nervegear off in that time?!". Its because they don't know the person is dead. The player's consciousness supposedly just floated in a void zone till they got brain fried. So an outside observer it would look like the person just instanced to a new zone and they would be none the wiser till it was too late.

tl;dl Read the LNs you fucking secondary

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I wanna glop into her for eternity.

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>saltpetre
You're running on old memes, old man, new rumor is a pill they give you is supposed to be a libido blocker

ah, plot convenience then
so why didn't Kirito just coded in the logout button when he tried to resurrect Yui with his haxxor skill?

When you read LIght Novels, do you just imagine all that shit in anime? Voices and mannerisms too? I need to screenshot this for Yea Forums, please be descriptive

>Plot convenience

He established it as a rule of the setting with Sachi and crew before he used it for Asuna. If that's "plot convenience" than so is every fantastical element of every piece of speculative fiction ever written that ends up helping the protagonists.

> resurrect Yui with his haxxor skill?

because you are purposefully misunderstand what that section was. He was able to access Cardinal's subroutine as it was purging the MHCP program and halt it long enough to turn Yui's core data into an environmental object (the necklace). Cardinal error correcting subroutine does not have nor has ever had system access to player logouts. Having limited access to a single part of an interconnected set of systems does not mean you have access to every part of said system group. That's CompSci 101

There were few enough to test it on one guy then do it 5 seconds later to everyone involved.

Let me guess, they don't fuck IRL though, because
>muh minors

I read them like I read any other book. Do I sometimes imagine the characters interacting in my head? About as much as any other person reading a work of fiction does. Are they literally just the same characters in the anime? No more than I imagined Vigo and Orlando walking around in my head when I last reread LoTR.

> I need to screenshot this for Yea Forums
Okay, also your taste in philosophers is shit surpassed only by your mindless praise of several incredibly vacuous pieces of 20th century """Literary""" Fiction as being worth anything more than toilet paper

He can claim whatever he wants, it may even be true, it sure doesn't seem true when reading that pile of garbage. Maybe he's a liar, maybe he's an idiot. The world may never know.

5 years since I didn't start masturbating until age 21. After that it's been every other day.

The voices, how do you imagine them? High pitch with gestures too? Do you imagine it in your first language, or japanese rambling assuming you don't know it?

whatever sounds good as i mentally jerk off to the anime girls in my head

>please be descriptive
>uses allegories only
Asshole, be more in depth so I can screenshot it and make fun of you

>how do you imagine them? High pitch with gestures too?
Not really, if I character has an inflection or the prose notes he or she has an accent I'll include that but that's about it.
> Do you imagine it in your first language, or japanese rambling assuming you don't know it?
I read English translations so they speak English in my head

They're all jealous of how perfect Asuna is.

Literally a Goddess

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