This was so shit. I should have stayed at home and just rewarded Apocalypto

>he got fooled by soiboy reviewers into thinking this was anything than mediocre

Who would win?

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Yeah the director really likes to drag out the unimportant stuff. That time could have been better used on more witty dialog or maybe including some badass shieldmaidens

I have a huge boner for this movie, but no matter your tastes what other current movies would be worth giving at least a try if not this?

The action was not well executed, it was like moving through molasses, like they were pulling all their punches to make sure no one was hurt. They could've had more energetic contact if Eggers wasn't trying to do long take shit to prove how auteur he is. The last fight was a bit of an improvement but it was visually lackluster and the indie budget couldn't handle such an elaborate setting.

The best movie I've seen recently is CODA

I liked it. Anya's character, if you think about it logically, would have had a hairy pussy in every scene of this movie.

saw The Green Knight last year or whatever, not gonna fall for this shit again

Agreed. Very underwhelming compared to the trailer

>he complains about the extended, detalied shamaic berserker dance
No wonder this movie is bombing, it filters plebs left and right

It's definitely better than the Green Knight, it actually has a story and isn't overtly artsy.

given the not-indie budget and the amount of action scenes the fight coreography was indeed underwhelming. but no reason why you can't have both, "long take shit" and well made fight scenes. I guess he just had no experience with the latter

It's much more pleb-friendly than green knight, don't worry

Name three (3) better films released in the last 18 months. I'll wait.

My friends, it's okay to admit that you got filtered by this all white masterpiece :)

Spider-Man: No Way Home
King Richard
Old

filtered. go back to marvel zoomies

I haven't seen these and I have no intention to do so, but I can tell they're shit. Opinion discarded.

kek literally exposing yourself as reddit-tier

one of those doesn't even count as a film

Vikingshit is boring and overdone. Id much rather take Romans at this point.

ALL MOCKERY OF JEWS

I enjoyed The Green Knight and didn't enjoy this even though I wanted to, so maybe you'll like it

Yeah rewarded is my fav thing to do as well.

Roman kino revival when?

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name 3 classic viking films from the past and the 30 years

name 1 whore who ate my asshole for $3.50

answer key: your mother

i watched apocalypto for the first time yesterday. pretty intense. itd be pretty cool to see more films set during the mayan or aztec civilizations.

Is the answer, your mother?

It's not Vikings, Gladiator, or The 13th Warrior, retard. You got filtered by a good movie.

>movie is objectively bad
>dude you got le filtered bro
Get cancer

I thought it was pretty solid, maybe not DVD worthy, but recommendable enough.
I understand the criticisms but I thought it was rich enough to be good regardless of whatever flaws you could pick into it.
I would recommend watching it after having drank a little if you are le ADHD zoomer.

timestamp kino stub

That was the BEST scene you fucking pussy

horrible take, this movie was pretty fucking rad

at least it was front to back action and savagery, and had no woke bullshitdx0r8

I think the big Eggers filter determiner is how much importance you place on plot. His movies are entirely about tone, setting, atmosphere

lol

the big problem with dune is the main character is literally some aryan genetic future-seeing god-boy with zero flaws, and that's not really worth rooting for as a main character which makes the entire story flat and stale

I was far more interested in the schemes and politics between all of the houses but that's barely touched beyond 'oh we've been enemies for generations :)' or 'the emperor is a jealous man :)'

That's a such a mom movie. Straight up Lifetime bs

It's a loose adaptation of Hamlet set in a universe where Norse myths are reak, there, you know everything worth knowing

>objectively bad
lol
lmao

I'm sorry for the low quality of this board OP. Those anons got trailer'd hard and can't handle anything different than fast-paced superhero productions.
It's over for this board.

>objectively bad
Explain in no less than 200 words.

The myth of Amleth predates Halmet. It's where Shakespeare drew his inspiration

>It's a loose adaptation of Hamlet
Jesus Christ, the absolute state of this board. 14 yo faggots pretending to be movie critics.

I can't tell if you guys are baiting or not. This movie was amazing. So what if it dragged in parts, when do you get to see a movie like this? It's like you have no perspective.

Yeah I'd love to see something like this too. Although if it were made in the current year, we would get some stupid revisionist bullshit, like Malinche leading men into battle or showing the Aztec Empire as a peaceful egalitarian society, or something equally ridiculous. Maybe in 10 years, when the culture war has died down, we can get a authentic historical portrayal of Mesoamerica. I loved Apocalyptico, but Mel was more interested in the story than historical accuracy.

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After watching the movie I want to fight a black man

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praising a movie here isn't half as fun as shitting on it, I'm in it for seeing tv trolls come up with creative ways to shit on this blessing of a movie

There's been two pretty big TV shows to be fair.

Vikings and The Last Kingdom

While I enjoyed them, they aren't anywhere near northman

>MUH WHITE CAST OF KINGS,THIS FILM WILL DESTROY ALL RECORDS

I WILL LET YOU FORGET YOUR WORDS,CHUDS
OH IM LAUGHING ON YOUR DUMBASSES TOO
AHAHAHAHAHHAHAA
AHAAHAHAHAH

Shakespeare's Hamlet has more in common with Amleth than The Northman. The Northman is basically The Lion King but vikings.

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lol, now I have to watch lion king

Ah, it's another 'Movie is liked by everyone except contrarians on Yea Forums' episode