Was it just me or was this genuinely terrible? I'm a straight white male too

The number of fucking times they go "tomorrow.... I will begin my revenge...", "tomorrow... the nightmare begins....", "tonight...". one of the worst screenplays I have ever seen

You got like triple filtered dude

>doesn't unstealth his sword and just beats the guys with his hilt
Did you miss the part where the sword can only be unsheathed at night for some reason? They even show a grunt trying and failing to open it after he gets tortured.

>"I'll fight you... somewhere else at a different time!!"
Cause eggers wanted them to fight in a volcano but he couldn't figure out how to get them there so he just had him say "let's go to the volcano"

Kind of agree, I like Anya but the movie would have been better without her. The last act is a mess with how hard he switches back and forth between “REEEE I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE” and “You complete me bbgirl

I liked it but was pissed that the cool Valkyrie from the trailer only showed up for five seconds

>NOOOOOO YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HE HAD TO FIGHT HIS UNCLE AT THE GATES OF HEL BECAUSE.... WELL BECAUSE HE JUST HAD TOO, OKAY?

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"The sword is tricky as it can only be unsheathed at night or the gates of hel."
However, I'll concede that he could have used any other weapon that he was shown to be proficient with, such as an axe or other sword.

I wanted to laugh out loud when Fjolnir is about to kill Olga and it just cuts to Amleth stood out in the open nearby. It looked like something out of Nacho Libre. This hard is very hard to take seriously.

>I will fight you at the Gates of Hel...
>The Gates of Hel....
>cuts to title card "The Gates of Hel"

Fucking weak.

I enjoyed the hell out it. It reminded me why I love watching kino on the big screen.

My friend, it's meant to look like a play or something from a legend. I am surprised that this was not obvious. Have you seen The Lighthouse? You don't think the younger one would ask the older one if he was fucking an octopus up there after he saw the tentacle and the old guy being naked? I mean come on. These are basic forms of irony from plays.

>No logical reason that his mom’s revelation wouldn’t have completely driven him over the edge
The guy was already over the fucking edge. He's been murdering people like a beast and watching children burn alive all his life. AND he did this without having ANY SEX. He started opening up because the girl was as fucking insane as he was.

I saw it. It was pretty cool.

KEK i couldn't believe that

The problem with that particular argument is that we're watching a film made in 2022. Not a play made in antiquity. The story itself is a folktale so you can't pretend it's some adaptation of established theatrical material, it is its own thing. I'll judge it by the standards of OUR time.

>he barks back at the dog and the dog runs away and the uncle and his friends didn't fucking hear him
It's not retarded, the movie explained it.
>he holds his sons heart
He does not have a son. He needed Olga safe.
>doesn't unstealth his sword
Just going to stop here because it's clear you weren't watching the fucking movie. This is why all we get is regurgitated capeshit. People like this have the comprehension level and attention span of kindergarteners.

>hello fellow straight White males
Clearly a jew

Not every movie is either outright kino or outright terrible. It was a cool and entertaining movie, but obviously not a masterpiece or anything. I appreciate him trying to diverge away from the typical A24 formula and trying something and ambitious.

Sure, it's not an adaptation, but the way in which the dialogue is performed right away between the king and brother showed the intention of it being similar to how a play is formatted. Even the title cards, showing "many years later in the land of rus" gave me this intention as well.

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You didn't get the movie, and that's ok. You can always revisit it when you have a few more films under your belt. It was FATED

filltered

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I can't believe these genuine retards have the same voting weight as I do.

I hated the part where he's just suddenly fighting a zombie knight in the tomb. I hated the super natural shit, I wanted a viking film grounded in reality.

>uses weapon
>kills them
and then what? It's like everyone is upset he didn't go on an unrealistic rampage against an entire village of armor and weapons all movie long. The entire point of the volcano erupting and gates of Hel, was to eliminate the entire village of people HE CAN'T KILL and also prove the father's words of "your kingdom will fall". And lastly the only reason Amleth died was because he showed kindness to his blood and let the mother and boy stab him

It was misleading. You're expecting a war epic but are told 20 minutes in that the villain is a pathetic fag that got ran out of his land in the intervening years and settled in an Icelandic mudhut, where 90% of the movie takes place. There are no real stakes. Who gives a shit.

Yea, would have been cool if fate played out in an interesting almost divine way instead of the characters being like "look we gotta go over there cause that's what we were told to do"

You can waffle on about Eggers's intentions all you want (believe me, I'm used to this kind of cope from your type - damn the studio for messing up his vision, am I right?!). I'm looking at the actual execution. If you're going to use a dramatic form to structure your narrative, then actually deliver some good fucking drama. Give us dialogue actually worth a damn. This film has some of the most verbose "I will do X and then Y because Z" dialogue I've ever seen. There's zero depth, just outpourings of mythology-porn for the history buffs in the audience. It's like if Shakespeare was just references to Greek mythology - it would not stand on its own.

How is he wrong

>you can't make a film with aspects from the past because it's 2022
Off yourself

It was pretty good. Im glad a based rightwing neonazi like eggers finally made a masterpiece for the far-alt-right. So based.

Filtered

>I wanted the movie to subvert my expectations, it didn't therefore it's bad.
Like I said, you didn't get the movie.

>doesn't understand the movie
>cries

Unironically what did he mean by this? Did he mean it as praise or condemnation?

He's looking at a dog and asking if it's not a cat

Terrible movie

You can use aspects of the past if you're gonna deliver. If you deliver shit then you can't just point and say "it was shit on purpose, because I was emulating this and this".

What? Where did I saw anything about subverting expectations?

It the film was average but Yea Forums want to hype it up for political reasons

A more apt analogy is that he's looking at shit and asking why it's not gold

Retard never read a saga. I recommend Njála and Hervarar saga og Heiðreks.

>divine way
>Norse mythology
There is no fucking "divine", Odin would laugh in your fucking face.

I love how the movie showed how weak Fjolnir's sons were as they lived in peace and riches. Instead of going on raids they hired others to do it for them (since in actual viking history many of them began to settle down once they realized raiding against kingdoms was unsustainable, so they began to build their own).

he's basically saying it's a bad film but a good nature/mythology/history 'thing'. mood piece might be the word.

its probably kino of the first tier, but no one with normie wallet will want to pay to see

I'm not even polser but it was well above average, especially given the shit released lately.

It was kino. Even Reddit loves it. Go look.

For fucks sake this generation is a lost cause. Go watch Avengers.

How did you two like The Green Knight? Did you think it was weak that the story was that the knight told him to go to his realm and be killed by him and he just did it?

Too bad it isn't a bad film.

>suddenly he's fighting a zombie knight in a cave that he just happens to find
>the zombie knight literally resets after he defeats him

The movie started losing me here.

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I was just using an adjective. I meant that it would have been more powerful and less unintentionally funny if their journey took them to the mouth of a volcano in an organic way instead of just saying let's go there and cutting to it.

Nobody cares about your retarded opinion. Movies are supposed to be creative, he can use whatever aspects however he likes.

Timestamp to 2:57 if you wanna know why eggers movie sucked.
m.youtube.com/watch?v=bgPh5cDEf0I

Probably the most common trope in mediaeval Icelandic lit.

>the zombie knight literally resets after he defeats him
Nah, it was more of a mental battle to see if he had enough spirit making him worthy of the sword

It was a battle for the ownership of the sword that takes place in his mind. This whole thread has been mind blowing to me. I must be a victim of some organized trolling.

WE
WUZ
VIKANGZ

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It filtered the plebs who just wanted more Ragnar Lothbrook and lots of fighting. It's slow but this was a much more realistic portrayal of these savage losers. Only problem was having them ripped like body builders.

Bruh. That fight was in his head. It didn't actually happen

I loved The Green Knight because there were enough obstacles and oddities to make the journey interesting. The ending was fantastic. Conversely I disliked The Northman because it was very "do this, then this, then this".

It's a bad film by most metrics.

I'm not sure what that has to do with anything because I never said anything like "the movie ending at the gates of hell is bad because we knew it would end there cause of the prophecy", I said it was bad because instead of building a story that naturally led to the gates of hell (you know, almost like it was FATE), they just have the main antagonist say "hey wanna go to the volcano cause it's the prophecy or whatever". It just comes across incredibly lazy and comical.

>Movies are supposed to be creative
... then why use an existing story. be creative but not 'too' creative? keep coping eggboy.

The volcano erupting by the time Amleth returned was organic. There was nowhere else for Fjolnir to go. He lost everything. If The mother and child had lived, Fjolnir wouldn't have went to the volcano. Essentially, the mother that everyone likes to ignore, at some point went batshit insane and only cared about both her sons in the end. Losing everything twice, knowing peace wasn't an option. She was dead inside. When she kissed Amleth after the revelation she was trying to provoke him to kill her (IMO), and succeeds the second time.

Amleth had no intention of killing the mother. He said he doesn't kill women.

>pushes skeleton into moonlight
Damn what a worthy battle

tl;Dr it was a dream

Only the small group of raiders and Fjolnir were ripped. Everyone else was normal. Also low bf% gives men abs

lol

it was, he showed he had enough strenght to keep up with the undead and also enough wit to beat him

I hope you're trolling

>the lazy way of getting them to the volcano is explained by the plot so it's ok
Like sure, he goes to the volcano because at that point he has nothing better to do, but it still comes across lazy and emotionally disappointing.

>There was nowhere else for Fjolnir to go. He lost everything.
???????????? he could've caught a boat to Orkney. you aren't explaining why he went to the volcano (reason? it was because the plot demanded it.)

says the guy who thought casting the lemon whore, rapist male porn a star who can’t act was a good idea

It was fate for Gawain to get his head lopped off and the entire adventure was just leading to that fate. I don't really see the difference. In fact, the "obstacles" are even more meaningless in that case.

>he hit the videogame boss in the glowing weak spot
Fucking brilliant Eggets

>This whole thread has been mind blowing to me. I must be a victim of some organized trolling.
that is just Yea Forums when they watch anything beyond retarded capeshit. They get genuinely get confused by a scene that even slightly blurs the lines of literal and metaphorical. This movie is as straightforward as they come, but you can see how much it filters the retards.

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'Enough wit' in this case means 'he remembered what the character said in the previous scene and repeats it verbatim when pushing the draugr'.

You literally just ignored my entire post.

>Voting
Is for cucks

Its only a terrible movie if it doesnt get eggers canceled for being an alt-right wing enabler.

yes? he's a fucking viking and that's just about the level of intelligence that he needed.

Him trying to save his mother is not a story then? He didn't kill Fjolnir right away because he knew he couldn't escape easily if he did it that day. Then he wanted to when he got the sword, but it didn't unsheathe due to being dawn. At that point, he realized that it was fated to end at the boiling lake. I don't know man, I thought this was an extremely straightforward movie.

Two more weeks. The screenplay of reality for the last two years

This board shits on capeshit all the time but honestly it seems tailor suited for you retards.