Depp v Heard 2 - What the fuck is he talking about edition
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Who are these fags commentating?
>What the fuck is he talking about edition
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God i wish that was me
What compels a man to marry a high maintenance girl?
I don't know who is more embarrassing, the ones commenting/making these threads or the fags actually recording themselves watching this and reacting to it for others to watch
this planet needs to be hit by a extinction level comet ASAP
damn, i speak in the same retarded rambling way
assumed actors would be better at formulating fluent sentences than a sperg like me
Talk about her doing a poo in the bed, that's the only interesting thing about this fucking story.
Dude, its literally like in the movies
>OBJECTION YOUR HONOR!!!!
>HEARSAY
>I ALLOW IT
what is wrong with him?
This is some ASMR Kino
>Depp's fighting Ameber Heard!
>that's the only interesting thing about this fucking story.
wrong youve missed out on johnny depps mom taking nerve pills and attempting suicide which depp expertly portrayed in an award winning performance
Depp fumbled one too many times, Amber's defense missed about 4 objections so far but it's all well and good for her, the way Depp's going he won't make it to half time. They should just ask for a time out and reconfigure their offensive game because as it stands his prospects aren't that great. Great defense by Amber's team, wasn't excepting them to come up with the lineup they did. My money's on Amber winning this instance. Depp's guys have a lot of work to do, his mic hog strat didn't go according to plan.
are you high user
The punch in the face sounds pretty hot too
>Overruled, I'll allow it....but you better be going somewhere with this!
What are the charges exactly?
heard probably fucks like a pro
It's a defamation lawsuit against Amber Heard, not a criminal trial.
What is this, some sort of football game to you?
>Dude, its literally like in the movies
yeah. this is the directors cut of all 3 lord of the rings movies.
i'm literally sleeping right now
Mr Depp is on trial for being fucking boring and rambling too much
Crashing this plane
>There was a white dress......and a costume designer....she loved the thing....she seemed to be the perfect partner...she loved the blues....she took off my boots when I got home...
This is peak "Ramblin' Depp" kino
Defamation about what?, what did she say about Depp?
So how did you meet mr. heard?
>The romans, you see, uh, smelted galena ore. I don't know if you know galena, some make jewlry out of it, but it can also be used, you know, uh, to make the filament in early crystral radios. I made, you know, uh, such a radio as I child that I listened to dr. Insano on. Wonderful man, him, I uh, kissed him open mouthed at the premier to Ed Wood. Uh...galena though, you know, is the a key source of lead, you know, the element lead, but also, perhaps even more importantly, it contains a small amount of silver, which is the main purpose for which it is mined. Hunter S. thompson once, uh, you know, shot another man in the head in front of me in order steal his silver necklace. So...uh, in greenland, there's these black bands of ice, and it's uh, it's just all lead pollution you know. Lead! Think about that. So uh miss heard....uh, Hunter told me once he'd kill me if i told anyone about it, and he meant it. He meant it.
My 60 year old mother is watching this in the kitchen and says Johnny is innocent and a gentleman and that Amber is a "fucking slut whore" lmao. Why women like Johnny so much?.
>keep talking, I fucking dare you
kek you're right
IS HE LITERALLY DRUNK IN COURT!!!!
WTF
pussy game ridiculous
Amber should liven things up by getting up and curling out a big shit right in the centre of the courtroom floor before returning to her seat like nothing happened.
Johnny just wanted some fucking sleep. fuck this whore
Amber broke reality and was too sexy so the female karma police had to intervene out of jealousy. Just another episode of Hera punishing a superior mortal because Hera is a cunt.
*harmonica plays*
>Why women like Johnny so much?.
he's good looking and violent
let johnny sleep he is tired
Her accusations have literally ruined his life and career are you dumb?
This is great stuff desu. I just hope he's being honest and not acting as I'd feel like retard for getting tricked. He comes across like a nice polite bloke.
Everything bad in life comes back to the simple fact that we like putting our penises in wet, warm holes until it feels good.
hope johnny pulls through. even my mom's been calling amber a vicious psycho whore for a while now
Basically that she wrote an article alleging he beat the shit out of her constantly and other general #METOO drivel. He'll probably lose but he gets to spend the whole trial detailing why she's a psychotic cunt.
>slim and steve
Sleepy girls are cute
>i called her slim
>i called her slim because…
>humphrey bogart
>she called me steve
>i called her slim…
This chud is over
You would believe a woman instead?
God imagine the sex with a woman who has this body and still goes max effort in bed.
It'd almost be worth the domestic abuse trial.
More like high incontinence girl lol
this is why you should only fuck bussy. a lil poop dick is better than this bullshit
Seriously, is there a piss test before court. This guy is on atleast 3 pills. And thats not even including alcohol.
beautiful...
...
...
*...
...creature
his career was dead years before they even met
also, i've yet to see any proof that what she said was untrue
but what if... you like the bullshit too
The jew at the top has a law degree, but I don't think he's ever practiced law. He was obsessed with the Vic Mignona accusations for some odd reason.
Depp can probably bang a different 10/10 every day of his life
I'd rather fuck a flabby uggo who isn't going to shit in my bed and sever my finger with a vodka bottle if I'm being honest.
>i called her sneed
Testifying is hard, chud
shes so hot and the crazy makes it so much better id let her choke my while she rode my dick
RASCAL
Rascally, like a rascal.
This guy is way less exciting in real life.
Why doesn't he just Jack Sparrow his way out of this in a kino fashion.
What a bummer
>she called me chuck
AGAIN
IS HE DRUNK?
HES SLURRING LIKE MY DEADBEAT FATHER
There is photo of the poop in the bed, right?
I remember seeing a photo...
Pussy.
Based.
His brain probably has become a sponge after years and years of substance abuse.
But he might be under influence right now regardless lel.
yeah but they cant make Fries in an airfryer like amber can
No but I just mean the stuff he's told about his childhood and whatnot
You just don't get it. I'd take an uggo who would shit the bed and cut my finger off over a Heard looks pillow princess. You can just fuck a doll for the latter. The former is its own experience.
No, as it's a complete fabrication of Depp's team. Don't believe everything you read on the interweb
>IS HE DRUNK?
our drug abuse experts have concluded he is on a mixture of opiates, benzos, and SSRIs
Has she admitted to pooing in the bed tho?
exactly
How the fuck would you know either way?
This is literally the greatest audiobook biography eevr. Hilarious and based as fuck.
>amber heards lawyers have fallen asleep
no
it was a dog
She never did and these claims are completely unfounded.
what is going on right now is a custody case for the turd. You know how celebs are about adopting and dragging around brown things.
Isnt that a felony in COURT?
Asmr with Johnny Deep
>his mic hog strat didn't go according to plan.
I don't know user, he seems to be going for an ultra long format jury-judge-prosecution omnidirectional brain eroding marathon
What he lacks in coherence and relevance he makes up for in stamina
He's simply going to outpace their fundamental sentience until no one knows who they are anymore, theres too much word count for anyone to coherently synthesize any kind of opinion about what he said in a positive or negative direction
It's majestic and beautiful to watch, I don't think this has ever been tried in the history of law
>YOUR NAME IS JONATHAN DEPP, IS IT NOT?
>YOUR NAME IS JONATHAN DEPP, IS IT NOT?
>YOUR NAME IS JONATHAN DEPP, IS IT NOT?
It's like listening to Bob Dylan's writing process.