I'm a 40 year old virgin

I'm a 40 year old virgin.

I became a movie title today.

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You jest. Such concept is unthinkable.

nice. 1 more decade to go for me haha

How? Are you a disfigured burn victim or something?

congratulations
sadly i failed at 24

Happy birthday

Congrats, I've still got 3 years left myself before I can claim that title.

Based please how is the wizardry coming along?

No, I'm not a freak, I had multiple girls hitting on me when I was younger. I just sperged out and it never happened and now it's too late

Were you raised by a single mother?

I’m halfway there bros

There worst fates in life. Ask divorcees.

Did you unlock any cool powers?

How do I not turn out like you, old man? You must have accrued some amount of wisdom from your abstinence, surely?

i'm only a 31 y old wizard
i kneel...

8 months til wizard powers here

I am The Lord of the Rings, AMA

I envy you. Married with a kid here. Literally wish I was you.

Just have sex retard. I'm tired of listening to you assholes whining about something that's incredibly easy to do.

what do you do for work? what goes on in your day to day life that you cant meet women?

Why do you focus on that movie instead of the one where goosling teaches him to become a literal pimp that fucks 40 bitches in a couple of months?

I had a threesome Friday night.

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congratulations man.

>congratulations man.
yeah bro, you made it
might as well watch that movie today, and make a habit of watching it every birthday from here on out
its what i would do

Good work, I'm just halfway there

How do I convince my gf to have one? I know several willing participants and she claims to be bisexual and "likes the idea", yet won't do it. She will kiss girls but that's it.

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One advice: do not waste your best years 20s, early 30s). Time flies by really fast and you never get back those years...

It's like we're twins.

>20s are the best years
>Already balding at age 19
It's over before it even started...

what spell are you going to cast in celebration?

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everything speeds up after 30

How'd you not have sex for FORTY fucking YEARS?
That's amazing.

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34 year old wiz here

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Happy birthday

If you care, hire an escort online
If you don't care, stop caring

>I just sperged out
This doesn't explain shit. Spergs have sex all the time.
Not once did a girl pull you into a bedroom just to see how you'd react to getting pussy?

she would laugh at him

lmao you people exist in a different universe.

it's strange how back in 2005 or whatever, 40 y/o virgins were very very uncommon but as time goes on the incidence of such people existing is going to get exponentially higher

here's the redpill. this is much worse than a virgin who actually tried to get laid but got rejected. at least they tried, at least they had the intention. it is not their fault they are incels, they are victims. if you rejected a girl's advances and are now lamenting, it is purely your fault.

I only have 3 more years to go

He wouldn't be able to talk to her.

>father emotionally absent
>mom keeps me close, says things like "you know you're different from other kids, right?"
>Grow up sheltered
>now I'm 24, tall and relatively handsome
>a lot of girls stare at me or flirt with me
>either sperg out and don't know what to do or my inferiority complex rears its head and tells me that I'd be a shit bf anyway, so why bother
>internalized that thought so hard that I resent myself for feeling these things and mostly fall for complete bitches, probably as a coping mechanism
>still a virgin
It sucks bros

>Spergs have sex all the time.
They don't

Stop sperging out and learn to just chuckle with a cute smile and say "sorry that was embarrassing" when you do something awkward.
They will find you cute and vulnerable.

Fuck off normalscum

It's really not that hard to stay a virgin
If you literally never try or make any sort of effort, you just sort of drift through life without any sort of female attention. I've got a lot going for me but I just never asked out or pursued any women

How many times can I chuckle and say "sorry that was embarrassing" per conversation per conversation before it becomes weird?

Sex is not everything in life be happy with yourself

>They will find you cute and vulnerable.
Bluepilled retard

menisit vaan panemaan pillua

>per conversation per conversation
heheh :) sorry that was embarassing...

I will never hire a prostitute to take my virginity. It's a zillion times better to die a virgin than lose your virginity to a paid whore. By doing the latter, you're physically admitting through action that you're so undesirable and so unlovable that you have to pay someone money to have sex with you. That's soul crushing and no man can recover from that.

don't worry about it ;)
you're cute :3 i'll take care of you :)))

I have done this and can confirm you're right.

December for me I have made peace with my fate.

No way, man, just buy a hooker bro.

27 here, I’ll definitely become a wizard, don’t know if I’ll reach 40 as a virgin. We’ll see.

When I was younger I thought I'd never end up as one of the losers who is in his mid 20s and a virgin then it turned into I won't end up as a virgin in his 30s now here I am. I'll probably end up just like you. God please kill me swiftly, I actually had a close call in an accident recently and sometimes I wish that would have been it. Never been so close to escaping this shit life. Depresses me thinking about it.

They're still uncommon, you delusional retard. Your autistic echo chamber isn't representative of the real world.

Do you still get wizard powers if you lose your virginity to a escort? Does it really count? Asking for a friend.

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Why?
If I like it, I'm then locked into draining my wallet every time I want to drain my balls, if I don't it's a waste of money.

How do I get girls to pull me into bedrooms and have sex with me?

god i hope russia and finland go to war. i hope nukes are involved. ill die happy knowing those fucking LARPing meme subhumans are dead too

You do know that you could make that accident happen yourself if you want it that much, right, you disingenuous sperg? Then again, you can't even manage to get laid

reproduction is the point of all life

How many cock rings do you have?

>mom keeps me close, says things like "you know you're different from other kids, right?"
Wow that’s bizarre. Some user posted a schizo video about how that’s your mom sabotaging you. I forgot the link but I guess its a lot more common than I thought

Virginfags, I ask you.
How many women do you flirt with in a week?
If the answer is zero than that's how low your chances are at having sex.
Proposition a woman at least once a day and it wont be a month before you've had sex.
Or just sit here and seethe and complain about normalfags when you're too fucking stupid to even realize that even the biggest Chad gets rejected a thousand times in a year.

I never said I wasn't a coward. It would be a lot easier if I could just go too sleep and never wake up but sadly it seems the only way out is by taking matters into your own hands... which of course scares me.

not saying they're common, only that they'll become more common than they were before with the exponential rise of autism

Holy shit you normalniggers are so smart, thank you for sharing your wisdom with us

That’s not an excuse user.

Not him, but I'm close. The best advice, which isn't really advice, is to be a normal person. Other than that I will describe what happened to me and you can take from it what you will:

>super-introverted, boring, borderline impossible to have a natural conversation with unless it's closest family
>no one ever showed any interest in me, and coupled with the above, convinced myself no one ever would, so I literally never even tried
>thought about trying many times, but with the aforementioned disability, figured I'd at least have to make up for it in some other ways
>first and foremost get a proper education/job
>unfortunately flunked out of university multiple times due to brainlet and lack of interest in the subjects, ended up wasting many years
>when I finally found what I wanted to do and got a proper job I was already 28
>thought about trying again, but felt it wasn't right, wanted to get settled and make sure I had something stable going on
>now it's somehow almost 10 years later, decent pay, zero loans, money in the bank due to having nothing to spend it on
>thought about trying again, but who the hell am I kidding, what the fuck would I even write in my dating profile at this point?

I guess the biggest point it is, if you don't try then it will for sure not happen, so don't wait too long. I could also never get past the belief that there's no one out there who would have me. In the end I never found out if that was true or not. Who knows, maybe it was and I just saved myself a lot of anguish?

tosi noloa jos ei edes naiselle voi sanoa että panettaa.

I was and I haven’t been a virgin since I was 16. Never had a problem getting girls either lel

>Your autistic echo chamber isn't representative of the real world.
Yes it is.

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I'm the kind of person who can't hold a conversation, not even with my parents.

By choice right?

Same here fren. Movies help take the pain away.