Write what's on your mind (we're all gonna make it edition)
Write what's on your mind (we're all gonna make it edition)
"I am the resurrection and the life. Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die"
My hotel wifi randomly caught a permaban for CP but didn't show me what post it was, especially since I never posted any
Is overly specializing in one area of your life a bad move? You spend so much of your life in one area, aren't you going to miss out on all of the other aspects of life?
I broke my leg a few weeks ago and thought I would be able to use my recovery time to work, but instead I've been going into work and just putting my leg up on my desk and continuing to slave away at my day job, and have been too tired to read when I get home.
I meditated every day for a while and it definitely seemed to quell my anxiety and improve my productivity/motivation, but that recent thread about The Mind Illuminated is making me worried that getting back into it will mean I'm unwittingly selling my soul to Satan
Do whatever you’re gonna do, cause you’re gonna anyway
No because you're doing what you want and it's impossible for you to be doing anything else
It's the whole breadth versus depth dichotomy. Mastery of a subject implies specialization, but nothing about a specialization dictates that you can have only one besides the opportunity cost of not spending an equivalent amount of time learning something else.
Is it better to spread yourself too thin or bunch up in one dense cluster?
In the past it was easier to be a polymath because the general level of knowledge was lower, thus the time to mastery was quicker. Now to get really good at anything you have to dedicate years. And even then, each domain of knowledge has been atomized and subdivided into micro-domains. As knowledge has expanded and differentiated, so has each skill become more granular and precise.
But maybe this isn't what you are talking about.
I was thinking in terms of job. Spending so much time hitting the top of your field is great for some and benefits humanity but you also lose out I think.
This seems like the answer. Some people cannot be helped and that is there passion.
Tool is finally coming out with a new album. Yippie.
a good choice
>sitting passively is bad
Well yea. One can meditate actively while going about business and commitments. It takes practice and is much harder but the fruits are heartier. I recommend you learn meditation techniques and apply them to waking life under the conditions that best warrant them. This takes a level of creativity that will undoubtedly be polished with time.
My job doesn't pay enough and women act like I'm a piss-peasant not ever worth their time of day because I'm not rich / tall / popular enough. I hate living in the USA and am leaving my hometown for Elsewhere before the year ends. Just leave me alone until I can leave; all of you. Just leave me alone. I hate everything about this place.
I hate living in the city. I am terrorised and intimidated every day in my rented flat. Some guy upstairs threatened to break both my legs when I was on the driveway. I was worried about going out to see my parents. That morning I was on my way to work to meet someone, and as I passed a very busy building where a lot of students were being put through, it was about 4am and I went by there expecting help, and it was a really scary moment for me. I was terrified. I was afraid that I would be assaulted by some of these people. And then the other day, I was walking to work and the guy on the street behind me, the guy with the knife, came forward and punched me in the face, and I fell on the floor and my pants fell down on my bottom, and my trousers went down to my ankles.
I'm wondering why there are riches and success that I dream of, they are within my five year grap but I do not actually see myself obtaining them. I have a cognitive dissonance going on where I would love to be a wealthy entrepeneur, but I clearly don't actually want to be, otherwise I would be busy making it happen. I don't actually know what I want beyond the short term. I'm starting to get into philosophy now so hopefully it should help? I have at least broken out of long term depression and have a new lease on life
I hate living in the city too but for different reasons. Nobody fucks with me but I just can't stand the lack of nature, the lack of serenity, the claustrophobic pressure of it, the issue of leaving your apartment and never knowing what kind of weirdo you might be forced to interact with, the dire public transportation, the sweltering heat trapped in the concrete, the expensiveness, the social contrasts, the anonymity, the intensity.
There are times in the night when the city covers me like a shroud, and I know I could just wander out there and get into all sorts of trouble. There are occasional moments where I feel the energy of this place bounding off the walls and rattling my skull and hitting me with a punch of adrenaline. The way it drunkenly blurs in the corner of your eye, the whirl and insanity, has a certain sparkling appeal to it on a good day.
yeah i think living in the countryside would be nice
Can someone explain what a normie is?
I don't think normie is someone who uses this board. There was a time where I felt normal and happy, later on that changed and I hadn't of gone on Yea Forums at this point.
Now, at 22 I'm feeling like I could go back to being a normie. It's an odd feeling but I feel caught in between. My guess is if I shifted my focus on getting a girlfriend, socializing more I would go back. I'm worried that I would also lose certain interests in this process.
Can you not be a normie and have children? Is that possible? I don't get the word.
One of the best periods of my life was when I was living in the countryside for college. It was an area with several colleges, so there was enough youthful energy to keep the social scene vibrant. The beauty and tranquility of that area has left an indelible stamp on my mind.
If I were to move to the country now I would be lonely and isolated. I wouldn't have that social network. It would be an entire, antithetical set of disturbances. You've got to find the right middle, the sweet spot between urban vibrancy and social potential and rural tranquility and spaciousness.
I can't envision a situation in which I ever get a gf and it bums me out. I'm no longer in school so I barely ever meet women to begin with, my hobbies are all either solo or male-dominated, same for my work. Dating apps kill my soul. I agree with Zizek that the beauty of falling in love is how it happens by chance, but where will my chance ever come from?
Think about a rock. Really, what makes a person any different from a rock. That rock is going to be OK. You're basically just a lot of poweder rocks and some water, mixed together. Just like how cornstarch gets that weird hard-soft stick with it. Same shit.
Are methbugs real? Those thoughts and feelings and shit you have? Is it real? Seems like methbugs. Rocks are pretty dope though.
They do all sorts of shit. Like be rocks mainly, but if people want to pick that rock up and do something with it, dope. Rock is always game. No interest? Still dope. I'm good straight chlling. Life is dope. It sorts of like rocks that move themselves and shit, but really it's just another type of rocks.
Would a rock give a fuck? No, not really. Rock is baseline. You master rock shit, basically god, because you're made of rocks and shit, also water. Water is cool too. Doesn't give a fuck either.
Master rock shit, and you're good. Then life shit, after that, it's extra. Just survival and reproduction. If you don't reproduce, let somebody else do it for you. As long as animals get made it's no sweat. Jobs done.
Beyond that, people shit. All thinking. Basically a crock of shit. Indistinguishable from hallucinations, delusional mania, schizophrenia, formication. Fuck all that. Just do people shit for kicks if really want to, just for sport. You don't need to try hard. Just do it like a rock. Solid. If people wants to make use of you, let them, rock style, you're their rock. No will inside of you, but plenty of give, let them people have it good. You don't care, think, complain, just rock style because you take after the greats. Your greatest ancestors. You may be like 70% water, but that's just water. The important shit is all those different rocks and shit inside of you, see them on nutrition labels, everywhere else, some sort of other chemicals and shit too. Real dope. Be like your daddy, be like rocks. I love rocks and other stuff too like bugs and shit, everything really. I just don't sweat people shit, that's like herbs and spices, but the meat tastes good too, the rice and beans, the drink, it's real good. I don't sweat those spices, I got my spice, whatever sort of mild I am, I ain't complaining, good enough for me.
Damn yall let me put lots of words in here. So dope, like fucking with my mind and shit. Ahhh. Yeah, that's good shit man. Not that my mind is really thrusting, just nutting endless nut, from my brain, into this raw textual pussy. Impregnating it with words and shit, real animal. Love this shit man. Feels good. Real fucking good though.
I'ma talk till you don't let me. Just to style, shits and giggles, fucks sake because it's not too meaningful to be meaningless. I got nothing heavy, my mind is empty, good and chill like the wind. As for making it, yeah, you start out without having or needing to accomplish anything, just rock, you can just be a rock if you want, you still get the job of a rock done, and rock is your daddy, don't knock the rock.
A normie is a socially integrated, well adjusted person without major mental illness or psychological or physical debilities.
Normies are the middle of the bell curve, the cultural prototype and standard. They like popular things and are the reason things are popular. There is also an undercurrent of normies being unquestioning, obedient, and complacent with the reigning status quo. They are "the herd" in the Nietzchean sense.
So if I slip into a well adjusted life I won’t immediately become a normie, I can still rise above?
I'll think of what I see on TV And hear on the radio
the only thing keeping me from attaining anything I want is my own strength
I don't know how meditation is going to make you sell your soul to Satan.
What exactly are you adjusting to? To normies? Then you will become a normie, of the token by which they are known is conformity. Being well adjusted is not a sufficient condition to being a normie. You also have to have a particular mentality, or rather a lack of a mentality, which is suspicious of anything that deviates from accepted boundaries. You must be resistant to deep thought, incurious about the world beyond your safe bubble, and most of all, carry a false sense of superiority for having these traits and being aggressively average.
Knowing your way around people doesn't necessarily make you a normie. While normies tend to have social skills (hence being well adjusted) they can only interact with those who are of their same kind.
I don't think being well adjusted inherently makes you a normie. It becomes harder though, for instance I will very occasionally go out and do some social activity and the one thing that's always very obvious afterwards is how much less time and energy I have for my weird hobbies. If I went out most nights (not too unusual for a person my age, I think) I would probably have to quit them altogether. And at that point what is stopping me from being a normie?
>of the token by
for the token by which
Had a dream that I lost both my legs from around the knees. I got prosthetics but don’t remember anything else. I am curious to know what this means, since I wasn’t looking at anything remotely related to losing limbs before going to bed.
I just read the alchemist and I really like the phrase: “it is all written by the same hand.” And of what the camel rider said in relation to that about loss. I’m attractive and fit and have no trouble getting women it’s just I can never trust them. I realized that my distrust of women is not in relation to my distrust of my mother rather it is in relation to the loss of my father. I’ve lost the greatest thing so far in my entire life, him and I am absolutely terrified of losing anything else. It would seem that loss would make you a more experienced dealing with loss but in reality it only makes you afraid. I am no longer afraid of women betraying me. The system I have to protect myself against others is so high strung it’s a labyrinth and it’s impossible to navigate. If a woman cheats on me or if a friend disrespects me behind my back all I can do is put it behind me and live in the present. It is all written by the same hand.
Dope.
I need to improve on the quantity of what I can write as well as some descriptive environmental elements, the quality is pretty good it's readable and I have heard positive things about it, but now it's about continuing the story and making it stick.
Really want to flesh out these stories and see how far they can go. I need to step up my game basically, go for a punt and get rewarded.
When I would do it I just focused on my breath and ignored my thoughts for 20-30 minutes though. Surely something like than can't have any long term effects, can it?
Why do all my beliefs and arguments radiate pure cringe in hindsight
I am close to finally losing my virginity. Very, very close. But now that I'm here, a part remains apprehensive, "is this really the way it happens?"
>is this really the way it happens?
yes u just put ur peepee in her veevee
You’re an artist user
does anyone have that post about a nurse or doctor talking about some disgusting obese person with rotting flesh in their fat wrinkles or something like that? i just remembered that and wanna read it again aha
I'm just so tired of all of this.
I want coffee even though I should probably be winding down and going to bed. I wonder if I'll ever have a social life. I'll try not to sweat the future, change will come when change is due and I'll keep making the most of things for now. I just need to work on a morning/night routine. I'll work on that tonight. After some coffee.
energy. need energy. can feel the energy there but need more
To-day Sandy Andy took Andy to the cleaners. To-day the Sandy Andy took One Lee incredulously to sad street. Here:
Andy Sandy, rather demandy, holding my handy and Andy, stole Lee’s bike.
Riding away quickly Andy tripped downstairs and died of a broken face. “Oh darn!” said Lee incredulously, “That Sandy not get he’s bike, that’s thief!”
I cried inside at home later when I told Sandy that Andy was died.
Tiny, Tiny, Itsy Tim Jogged Up the Spider Gig
Ch. 1
Flowing spiders, waterspout walls full - “Tim Tables, we’ve arachnids who know saxophone inside the club”
“There ain’t anyone can’t jive Tim’s tunes when he’s playing’ with legos, lass.”
Everybody’s swingin’ that sweet grease. Nobody’s about standing there like a sandwich. Legs up, shoulders bounce round, knees bend-buckle and spiders tickle ivories - jammin’ cool. Fangs drip that greasy thang soft like silk puddin’.
There, Itsy Tim found peace in the cool gaze of Spider Fitzgerald.
Ch. 2
Legend has it that Spider Fitzgerald has not never take no one human man since Huge Herman.
i haven't had proper human interaction in 4 years and am slowly degenerating into madness. online friends aren't sufficient so it seems.
Went for another nightwalk. It's getting even colder now, so I had vest and underwear on this instead of completely naked. I hope I'll be able to keep it up until at least late September, there's nothing more freeing than being alone in the cold. I could really use a warm shower now.
You have good prose
I can't let go of my teenage conception of love. Real adult relationships seem so shitty in comparison it tears me up inside. It's hopeless.
Why would the entirety of Yea Forums just stop working for a half hour?
someone posted the alien on /pol/ again
After shopping for some new shoes, I almost forgot how short Mexicans are. Though I am back to the mundane and back from vacation. Probably the most fun I have had in awhile even if it was in a place I didn't care for.
Yea Forums used to have some intelligent people but now it's filled with people who talk like niggers while shilling white supremacy. Literally bix nood White Edition in here.
"Real adult relationships" are just as much a manufactured narrative as the "teenage conception of love". Trust what you feel-- that inexpressible kernel, which is found, but never articulated. To attempt to articulate would be a great sin.
check r/sorceryofthespectacle
go for a walk
Jordan Peterson really does sound like Kermit the Frog lmao
Wow I wish I was a lecturer. I give myself lectures all the time. If I could get paid to just speak what's on my mind, that would be golden and ideal. And I got shit to say! Half of the shit I say is smarter than anything else that is being said, you can bet on it.
what is this
99 Luftballons
Auf ihrem Weg zum Horizont
Hielt man für Ufos aus dem All
Darum schickte ein General
'Ne Fliegerstaffel hinterher
Alarm zu geben, wenn's so wär
Dabei war'n dort am Horizont
Nur 99 Luftballons
Wrote up a shitty draft but since the material involves killing someone I cant post it in my social circles for critique.
Also i tried to be sexual and to connect it with my fetish but not too much to where its just murder porn yknow?
I hate these drafts, I work on them for like half an hour and then discard them
VICARIOUSLY I LIVE WHILE THE WHOLE WORLD DIES
MUCH BETTER YOU THAN I
>Not that my mind is really thrusting, just nutting endless nut, from my brain, into this raw textual pussy.
Hot.
Nigga you're already Satan, wake up
youtu.be
Another working day.
AKA
Same shit, different day.
Weee
I live in LA. It's a shithole. Turned me into a neurotic fuck. Physical environment definitely plays a role in mental health. I want to die.
Be careful user, sounds like you're on the road to solipsism.
It's one of those days: muttering to myself like a mad fool. Blah.
I could date a stick of dynamite and still wouldn't go out with a bang
Hesychasm.
Just sleeping in a bed is enough to irritate my knees for the whole day. Last night, I had a dream that I was fishing in the ice covered Nile with two children and caught an enormous fish on my first cast. The fish was about 80 lbs, slimy like a catfish, and covered with eyes all over it's body. I'm a vegetarian in real life but dream me was incredibly hungry for it, the dream ended as I drug it near a fire place.
how can women be so detestable yet so lovable
It is clear that the world is purely parodic, in other words, that each thing seen is the parody of another, or is the same thing in a deceptive form. Ever since sentences started to circulate in brains devoted to reflection, an effort at total identification has been made, because with the aid of a copula each sentence ties one thing to another; all things would be visibly connected if one could discover at a single glance and in its totality the tracings of Ariadne’s thread leading thought into its own labyrinth. But the copula of terms is no less irritating than the copulation of bodies. And when I scream I AM THE SUN an integral erection results, because the verb to be is the vehicle of amorous frenzy.
Michael Gira?
I just learned what an unmutilated penis actually looks like and now I am fucking angry at my parents for ruining mine, the statutes of limitations are past so I can't even sure for damages
I dreamt about my former professor telling me that I can succeed professionally and now I am incredibly turned on by the idea of her giving me a neglectful handjob.
>I just learned what an unmutilated penis actually looks like
had you never watched porn before now?
or are you 12 years old?
Naruto runners go round
Say the lords prayer throughout the day.
I need to get a haircut.
I need to lose weight.
I need to come up with two more ideas for web serials so I can make a body of work.
I want a pet.
I have way too many books I'm reading at the same time.
I'm tired.
I need to find some nice slice of life fantasy novels.
We unironically need to bring HUAC back, foreign communist control of the media is a serious fucking problem and heads need to roll
I could take a pinky but not a whole dick
How do I get interested in things? I'm numb
Far away
I am entering my final year in uni and I am pretty scared. Once this joirney ends I will be forced to face what I sought to delay; the working life. I have never worked well with other people or the responsibilies of work, routines also kill my soul and so I fear not only screwing up but also the dreaded hamster wheel of modern life. I quit my last job out of the blue four years ago and since I have lived in bliss knowing all I HAVE to do is attend class and pass.
Im not sure what will happen
See the user, his sentences immaculate in their construction as he pens the finest prose our eyes have seen.
See the user, his literature dry and bland, lacking in any meaningful characterization. This fraud, how dare he compare himself with the best, he lies and he deceives. A proprietor of shallow poetry and the patron saint of falsehoods and half-truths.
I've been ill for a bit after surgery, and one girl texted me during these past two weeks. She talked about whatever, and I was content with that and didn't think anything of it. At one point she mentioned texting, and I questioned if people really text that often about so many things. She replied that I must be in the wrong conversations if I wasn't aware of how prolific texting was. She didn't realize this was the first conversation via text I've had since I've had a phone.
How do I reconcile my distaste for texting/phone calls with the fact that everyone texts now? I just want to be comfy and talk in person. Am I doomed to be left behind socially?
Mother of God, what happened to DeviantArt? The site has always been ugly and poorly designed, but that was nothing compared to how it looks now. Who thought this was a good idea? It's actively painful to look at now.
if she texted you, she likes you, you can fuck her, this is the train of thought you should follow and not whether or not you like texting
if you mess it up she will move on because girls are not stupid
I'm very excited for the upcoming fall.
Any Halloween costume ideas?
I think more can be easily saved through faith alone if they only opened their heart a little bit.
Yeah be careful about that user, I read it somewhere too meditation can open doors of invitation for weird spirits to weasel their way into your mind.
The seasons are changing and that makes me very horny, fall is always the most erotic time for me
peepee poopoo
Anyone here have a PhD? How grueling and hard was the process and are you glad you went through it?
user, quit being stupid and leverage your distaste for texting as an aspect of your personality that 1) makes you more mysterious, intellectual, robust, etc.. and 2) Urges her toward spending time in person which is clearly your goal anyways. I don’t know what you think the problem is. Bitches love when I don’t respond to them for like a day and a half and then just say some shit like “meet me here tonight.. wear something nice”.
pastebin.com
pastebin.com
anonymousfiles.io
anonymousfiles.io
all in spanish. could use some guidance and critiques
i would give you guidance and critiques but i don't speak mexican.
I'm truly hoping that tomorrow is the day that changes my life for the better. I'm still holding on to the Fairy Tail belief that good people eventually get good things, that bad people eventually get bad things. My life has been nothing but bad and I have tried to be nothing but good. I know I have often fallen short, however, but people around me have often told me that I am too kind for my own good. I was taught to be as callous as possible to get everything that I've wanted, but it never felt right. I've always wanted to help people and have sacrificed more than I've owned for people that have usually never returned the favor. I'm tired of suffering, of having less than nothing, of being made a fool time and time again by people who claim they wish the best for me. If I'm unable to move on to a new life tomorrow, I don't know how I can keep living. I say this, but I've said this over a dozen times already. I'm in this endless loop spiraling ever downwards but never truly reaching hell. My suffering is never grand enough to justify actions to relieve myself of it, but is consistently bad enough for me to constantly numb myself from it. I feel that I am at a crossroad, one in which I could never redeem myself or correct the path I've chosen, at the young age of 24. I feel like I'm 55, where any bad choice will permanently cut me off from any upward opportunity. Maybe I've been depressed for so long because I've never had anything good, or maybe this is just the default, but I'd rather not have anyone feel the way I do. It doesn't feel bad, per se, just normal, but everyone seems so much higher than standard as their default. The impulse I get when walking on the sidewalk to leap in front of the semi that rolls down the highway is normal to me, but disturbing to anyone I wish to share the sentiment with. I've never done it and I never planned to, but the thought puts itself in my head and I merely observe it for what it is. Therapists have told me that this is an issue, to normalize suicidal thoughts, as it is a marker of depression, but I don't feel depressed, just nothing. The only time I don't feel nothing is when I feel rage. When this feeling comes up, I shake like a leaf and the impulse thought goes from walking across a freeway blindfolded to how long it would take of me slamming my fists into his skull before someone would decide to restrain me. I often think about keeping bricks in the passenger seat of my car in case someone decided to cut me off or be a dick to me in traffic. Again, I've never done it and I never planned to, but the thought places itself in my head and I observe it. I'm convinced that I'm an evil person, but only because everyone else has told me so after I share these kinds of thoughts with them. If they don't know what I think or believe, they think I'm a saint. I hate how there is no middle ground. The character limit is almost up, so I'll leave this post as it is.
Pray for me.
It's not a critique thread, it's a "write what's on your mind" thread. I don't expect anyone to read it
>My suffering is never grand enough to justify actions to relieve myself of it, but is consistently bad enough for me to constantly numb myself from it
Ain't that the truth
Things suck user, I feel you all the way. All you can do is keep trucking
>Fairy Tail
>Tail
I'm stealing this for my dating profile
All lies can be proven as contradictory but real ‘truths’ cant because they are beyond proof and paradoxical. Real passion beyond love or hate, real justice beyond right or wrong, real morality beyond good or evil etc.
just change fall to autumn so you sound like a poet.
i'll never be as good as jimi. i know i shouldn't envy but i do, and perhaps, i always will
i'll never be as hung as tyrone. i know i shouldn't envy him but i do, and perhaps, i always will.
I need to pick a writer as a topic for a presentation in a month. Songwriters are acceptable. I'm between Jim Morrison and Aldous Huxley, or maybe I'll pick someone else, but I should probably pick tonight or I'm really gonna stress myself out this weekend
bob dylan
Why not start writing a novel with a Google voice recording on the toilet
or rather I should start working on that podcast promised her I would do a podcast and I never did
Okay here we go, there are lots of people that you know who are good friends of yours, and you get along naturally with them, just like there are people who you met and just didn't hit it off with. Maybe it's because of your life experiences, maybe it's because of your innate likes and dislikes oh, but the truth is that some people are your crew and some people are haters.
That's the same way that it is for the planets. The Sun is a kingly Graha, associated with power and dignity, so he doesn't really hit it off well with the extremely humbling and grief-signifying Saturn.
Friendly reminder that this isn't literature you arcanites
go back to your obscure philosopher containment thread.
I love how you've dwelled on that phrase and brought more out of it than you would by reading it and moving on. My phrase like this is "Indifference is not the absence but the repudiation of all emotion" from This Blinding Absence of Light. I think I need a new one though, my shitty childhood and moving out at 17 and everything has always given me the mentality that I cannot need anyone and I must be perfect through it all. I must repudiate all emotion and strive to be indifferent to the bags of sand strapped to my back. Now I feel like I cannot even rely on myself, and that was all I ever had. I wish you luck with dating and facing your fears.
So about the song Firth of Fifth, even the fucking author of the lyrics (Peter Gabriel) said he thinks they are terrible, but I actually enjoy that style.
I still think "The sands of time were eroded by the river of constant change" is a very powerful sentnce to end the whole thing, not to mention the use of that piano solo.
This kind of stuff makes me want to present it to my Geography students like I presented a particularly poignant passage of Clarice Lispector's work when I was teaching Kierkegaard in the Philosophy classes
I really much prefer Philosophy to Geography
I love her so much. I want nothing more than to see her and tell her how much she means to me. Nothing else makes sense or matters to me then making this right. I want to reach out, but as long as I’m blocked, that means I’m a nuisance to her, that she doesn’t want me in her life. As much as that hurts, it doesn’t compare to the feeling of utter confusion I feel when I see her almost everyday making an effort to stay in contact with me. I just don’t understand, and I’m beginning to realize she doesn’t either. I want her to feel safe, and if keeping me away at this distance does, and talking to me through smoke and mirrors is all she’s willing to do, so so be it. But it’s a sad story, because I know what all this means, to wanting to be so close to someone and yet so incapable of actually being there out of fear, to be unwilling to let go, or come together, when that’s all you know is left to do. I’d much rather this intermezzo than letting go. But what i dream about everyday is being with her again, of showing her how much I’ve changed and willing to in however she needs me. It’s been such a long time, and I can’t imagine a life without her as her, the girl I am absolutely in love with, the girl of my dreams
What is aesthetic supremacy? It is a reflection of post-structuralism's central idea, that the "subjective experience of beauty is the ground of reason and the basis for all human discourse." In such a world, a certain "self-identity of beauty is the basic condition, the basis for all value of aesthetic object and for all object's relationship with other objects. It is therefore one of the fundamental conditions for the development of a new aesthetics."
Full book coming soon.
The greatest burden Ive been given is to exist. I make an effort to smile and find joy, but at the end of the day i sink into my bed. Praying to the deity I believe in to help me not wake up.
Most of the girls at church see me as mysterious/intellectual since I'm an intern that helps around but I don't know how to leverage it into a relationship.
She's not my type.
How do I explain to my parents that hermeticism isn't Satanic? I really wanted to buy some books but since my parents are really religious they said no. I tried to explain to them how it isn't and the complex history behind but my dad cut me off with "mysticism is a gateway to demonic possession" and shit.
Is it possible to read literature as philosophy?
I mean, is it possible to read literature, such as philosophy, in a way that does not imply that you understand it already?
Bittersweet feeling about this because I loved the way the story developed and all the hypocrisy it exposed, but the life has no meaning apathy shit is just sad wankery that I don't think I cared to hear. I expected more.
Venting here because I don't know where else to go.
I just told you how to Leverage it. It sets you apart from the crowd, and if you do it with full confidence it makes you seem interesting. Letting other people’s opinion of you make you insecure, makes you come across as a pussy subconsciously to a woman. Whereas a Man that never texts back because he has more important things to do than sit on his phone and blabber with women, is infinitely more intriguing especially if you give off a mysterious vibe. And thus, you establish that your time is valuable, and it will make the experience of spending time with you in person even more exciting.
Fair enough. Thanks for the help.
I can only express myself when I drink. I'm only interested in complex ideas when I drink. It may be because my mother took painkillers when she was pregnant with me - I only say this because I just found out about it a couple months ago, but the idea has been making sense the more the I think about. I'm always reluctant to approach anything intellectually stimulating (or even anything demanding athletic coordination for that matter) for fear that I might I not be able to work it out quickly. I've always taken three times as long to grasp concepts than it does others. But then I think my problem may only be fear. I'm nearly finished with my masters and played hockey (reaching the junior level) since I was nine - I was good too. I think I might just be afraid. I think I may just be a coward, and have always been. The fact that my mother took painkillers has nothing to do with it. How do I stop being a coward? How do I stop drinking?
I'm drinking now
Everything I want is so far away, and so close
Having *actively* unsupportive family is basically the worst possible thing to happen to a person in a first world country. If I was brutally raped but had parents that actually gave a shot about me outside of how many good boy points their religion gave them for having me, I would be infinitely better off. Fuck them, and the pit of misery they love to wallow in. The pit they constantly try to drag me back into. They don't even understand their own religion and hide like rats from anyone who can prove them wrong and pout, and knash their teeth whenever someone hold them accountable. "I'm being oppressed!" they call out after a member is arrested for kidnapping (that they laugh off as a childish joke 30 years later). Seriously fuck them and their kitchsy aesthetic, their large loveless families and hate of learning, their unipolar perspective, and generally jewishness, fuck them
welcome to my life tattoo. we were locked out together me and you
>How do I stop being a coward?
Been trying to figure this out myself for years.
quam acer est vita et, quam gravis sum
>hate of learning
why, someone please tell me, why are boomers like this?
I'm in a new area how do I locate my local dealer? I never had to do this at my old place. It's friday and I'd like some weed.
I know, I know .... >dude weed xd
What purpose does it serve you?
It's a stay in bed and skip work depression day for me, again
They won't be weaseling their way out.
Probably some of the most disappointing people you can meet in life are artists, especially young artists, because the older ones accrue opinions and experience simply on the basis of having lived long enough to do so.
None of them know anything, half of the time not even about art. Think of writers who a) don't read all that many books, b) don't care enough about their craft to learn about great authors/style/etc, and the have the audacity to claim they "just want" to make their art, c) spend most of their time bullshitting, hustling and networking to get their dogshit work exhibited. That's what most fucking artists are like, it's unreal.
cocteau twins
Thinking about quitting my job and moving out of my parents house, there isn't a future for me here, but I don't know how to live independently and they'll do anything in their power to keep me from getting away from them
I'm annoyed the college thread died because I wanted to ask if anyone in Chicago wants to start a reading group for weird philosophy shit
Are you going to make it D&E?
If you mean outlasting virtually every tripfag on the board sure, fuckin E Z
Have you made it user? (Do not respond to this if you haven't been posting here for at least 8 years, you're a newfag and your views and opinions don't count for anything)
what do u guys think about this statement?
"no one respects the sadness of men"
my first thought is.. why should sadness be "respected" by other people..
focusing on your breath only from time to time isnt going to make you sell your soul to satan, however if you subscribe into chakra/dharma hindu pajeet fringe larp you can experience some werid unchristian consequences.
been in the exacly same posistion fren and I really know how you feel, you are not alone in this suffering.
>I'm still holding on to the Fairy Tail belief that good people eventually get good things, that bad people eventually get bad things.
this is true but not in this life. John 15:19
>my life has been nothing but bad and I have tried to be nothing but good.
the very act of trying doing good is a treasure in heaven that absolutely nobody can take from you .Matthew 6:19-21
> I've always wanted to help people and have sacrificed more than I've owned for people that have usually never returned the favor.
you don't do good things to people because you want something to them , you do it because its the right think to do
> I'm tired of suffering, of having less than nothing,of being made a fool time and time again by people who claim they wish the best for me.
suffering brings you closer to Christ. if you belive in him you have everying for eternity. people are evil by nature and you should feel gratefull you aren't like them . the more you suffer the more you are able to uderstand people who also suffer and this is rare thing.
>Maybe I've been depressed for so long because I've never had anything good, or maybe this is just the default, but I'd rather not have anyone feel the way I do. It doesn't feel bad, per se, just normal, but everyone seems so much higher than standard as their default. The impulse I get when walking on the sidewalk to leap in front of the semi that rolls down the highway is normal to me, but disturbing to anyone I wish to share the sentiment with. I've never done it and I never planned to, but the thought puts itself in my head and I merely observe it for what it is.
suicide is never the option. Read the book of Job. God sometimes let us suffer in a way that it doesn't kill us but rather make us rethink our life.
I understand your actions and almost everyone would done the same had they suffered enough . I am going to pray for you from time to time
For God does speak—now one way, now another—
though no one perceives it.
15 In a dream, in a vision of the night,
when deep sleep falls on people
as they slumber in their beds,
16 he may speak in their ears
and terrify them with warnings,
17 to turn them from wrongdoing
and keep them from pride,
18 to preserve them from the pit,
their lives from perishing by the sword.[b]
19 “Or someone may be chastened on a bed of pain
with constant distress in their bones,
20 so that their body finds food repulsive
and their soul loathes the choicest meal.
21 Their flesh wastes away to nothing,
and their bones, once hidden, now stick out.
22 They draw near to the pit,
and their life to the messengers of death.[c]
23 Yet if there is an angel at their side,
a messenger, one out of a thousand,
sent to tell them how to be upright,
24 and he is gracious to that person and says to God,
‘Spare them from going down to the pit;
I have found a ransom for them—
25 let their flesh be renewed like a child’s;
let them be restored as in the days of their youth’—
26 then that person can pray to God and find favor with him,
they will see God’s face and shout for joy;
he will restore them to full well-being.
27 And they will go to others and say,
‘I have sinned, I have perverted what is right,
but I did not get what I deserved.
28 God has delivered me from going down to the pit,
and I shall live to enjoy the light of life.’
29 “God does all these things to a person—
twice, even three times—
30 to turn them back from the pit,
that the light of life may shine on them.
This may be too specific, but are there any texts covering the topics of the degradation of personal taste/aesthetic conviction as it relates to modern media? I have Baudrillard and McLuhan in mind but I’m not sure
Adorno and Bordieu, maybe even Spengler
My capricious mind now wants to know how exactly ennui spirals into depression
much appreciated, any specific works that stand out?
All I want is to be held and told things are going to be okay, preferably by a cute girl
anime otaku culture is richer than amerikan culture T B Q H
i never been a happy person
dont get me wrong im not angst all the time nor whining all the time
rather im pretty apathetic to life,with a cynical view on general kinda ''bad news?,well nothing new'' aproach to life
my mother was a self delusional narcissistic that tried to leash me as a emotionally dependent pet in order to fulfill her own manias and traumas
my father was man lacking meaning,traveling around thw world maybe seeking something to live for,maybe just seeking death
i grew heavily isolated,so books were my refugee but eventually i found myself reading sartre and camus
this mold my view of lifes strongly
i dont really enjoy anything nor have a real porpuse on my life,but im self aware of it
>Liberalism
Dead
>Marxism
Dead
>Fascism
Dead
>Postmodernism(?)
Dead
Okay, what comes next? Accelerationism? Managerial Neoliberalism? What about the climate? China? Migration? What does the world look like in 200 years? 2019 isn't *that* different from 1819, most of the major players are the same, just a few less Kings. Who are the players now and how will they change?
>Marxism
>dead
A literal communist party is in charge of the largest nation in the world and their stated objective is to develop their productive forces to the point where they can implement socialism. Maybe it's all a ruse but calling marxism dead is retarded.
I’m watching this fucking Ted Bundy movie with my bb. It’s bad
Zac efron is wooden as fuck but more importantly I hate how bad movies are in general now
They’re not creativity driven at all. Producers, curators and marketers run the industry. Everything is just an investment and it shows.
I used to love movies. They make me want to puke.
Eh, they are so far removed from what Marx envisioned that they would be unintelligible to each other. I seriously doubt that Marx would be on board with state run sweat shops with suicide nets supplying commodities to the capitalist west, even in the name of tactical advantage
I just want some good news so I can finally thaw out in a hot shower. I feel like if I bathe the bad news will come instead so I just sit around doing nothing -rotting in place- hoping the phone will finally ring and release me. I'm so tired and filthy but my compulsions are ritualistic and inflexible. I'm so selfish and hypocritical. I hate how whenever I actually feel something I freeze. Just once I want something to be okay so I can go back to feeling nothing.
Neo-petty bourgeoisie is all they are, completely content to see workers slave away for their luxuries while they supposedly would live out the socialist dream.
Trotsky and Stalin had this match already and it ended up as a brutal dictatorship.
A return to the occult, I'm looking forward to it!
McMagic
Dude now that i think about it lifes ok. Like that shit doesnt change unless you change the meaning of change. Woah say that six times fast haha
What do you think it means? Could you relate it to some aspect of the day before the dream?
I feel the same way. Trying is uncool in every aspect of life. Maybe try dealing with the cringe rather than figuring out something that's cool.
Thats as real as it gets. Once that lies in the past sex will loose its charm
most men lose their virginity by getting a chick drunk enough to consent
I believe in you user. Church is great to socialize
I'm 58, and I and a 41-year-old woman recently failed in our last attempt to get pregnant. My main preoccupation now is whether I will be at all useful to anyone when I retire.
Hey Dream Lover!
horrifying
Don't try to knock up a woman that old. The likelihood of the child being a stillbirth, or having autism or some other congenital disease, increases substantially.
I'm unlikely to find anyone younger.
It's almost certain that I will never have children.
He grew blood red vision for all that good intention.
Could be worse. All your retirement money would be funneled into raising the child, and given your age, you'd probably die on them at an inopportune time.
Just spend your retirement drinking margaritas and smoking cigars in the Caribbean.
Funny you should mention that. I'm drinking some Mount Gay rum on the rocks right now. Would like to visit Barbados sometime.
Maybe I can get famous writing erotica and then knock up some young erotica lover.
I've heard it said we are in a so-called interregnum, a period of ideological lapse where the status quo has been discredited but no replacement ideology has been instituted.
I envisage several disconnected threads which might serve as the basis for the next phase. Artificial Intelligence, eco-politics, the resurgence of and old fashioned Great Game power struggle between the dominant nation states, peak oil, Islamification, right wing irredentism, cyberwarfare, gene editing and bioengineering, an upsurge in protests and riots concerning economic inequality (pending the next economic recession), and possibly a major war.
What seems to characterize our times is an intense incredulousness toward ideological grand narratives. People don't have anything to believe in, because they don't want to believe in anything. Belief is what gets you into trouble. So we have the opiates of consumption and hedonism and the pursuit of self-gain, which has a dampening effect on political consciousness.
We await a global shock, a moment where a sea change shakes people out of their stupor and energizes them with the will to believe.
Hey yourself.
It's really nice that we have the internet, despite all the shit the modern world has brought. I'm really happy I get to post here with you all and read everyone's posts from across the world.
While I sort of agree, I'm very conflicted about the Internet, and am leaning towards the belief that the world would be far better off if it never existed.
>the world would be better off if X (constitutive but small and thereby diminishable part) did not exist
I'm also a pessimist, I also agree that the world may have been better off never existing, but I'm much more hesistant to allow ad-hoc nonexistence to exist in the place of post-hoc [non-]existence.
Good post
coolio
Homo
>what comes next
usually things happen
with that in mind, we shall see, user
I hate studying and homework kills my soul. My major is so time consuming and hard I just want to start working and have at least some free time to do things I enjoy in spare time
t. Zizek
Bataille.
Everybody gets one.
Fuck bros, I miss my ex gf...
where does the wish for apocalyptic times comes from
>urban vibrancy and social potential
i haven't left my cell sized room in 3 years while living in a city
the realization that the world is not what we'd like it to be
And the city is to blame for that?
No, it's the Jews that are at fault
Just my two cents, but American Jews drastically underestimate just how much gentiles absolutely resent them and just how much physical danger they are in. If I were one, I would push for balls to walls full damage control and take a good hard look at their actions as a group. And not just the usual censorship/shut it down damage control either
jews were the most in need of conversion by the followers of the Christ, but look how they spurned him, and look at their operations now. jews are the sons and daughters of the devil, and they are rightly hated by the world
I really want to have a cock inside my ass right now
If you got to know them they're not all that bad. Some have a bit of a complex, but I highly doubt this bogus conception that Jews are behind every thing bad, obsessed with diabolical machinations, and plotting the world's destruction like a bunch of cartoon villains. It's a kind of leftover medieval superstition and an indicator of low intelligence. to believe otherwise.
I don't necessarily disagree. It's the refusal to really examine the roots of anti-semitism that is really going to come back to bite them. The idea that people don't like Jews completely unrelated of Jewish actions is actually quite dangerous (for them), there is no way that you can sincerely repair your reputation if you don't understand why it's so bad in the first place. I can understand why they would have that idea though, seriously coming to terms with the wrongdoings of the Jewish community would be difficult even under the best circumstances and destroying your self image like that is almost too much to ask for, but it's necessary if they want to ease tensions. It's a shitty situation and I sincerely wish them good luck
Jews do have a strong nepotistic streak owing to centuries of ostracism, and the religion does tend to breed a superiority complex, "God's chosen" after all, is quite the designation.
There are several undeniable instances of Jews committing acts of wrongdoing, Epstein, Madoff, Kushner. But it's a fallacy to attribute this misbehavior to Jewishness itself, in the same way that it's a fallacy to blame any group for the actions of the individual.
Just because some Jews are crooked financiers living well of ill-gotten gains, off rents and other types of economic parasitism, doesn't mean thats' a Jewish trait. After all they aren't the only ones doing it.
Zionists make the situation entirely worse because of how pushy and militant they are, suppressing the Palestinians with disproportionate violence, and then playing the victim all along. Crying antisemitism every time Israel is criticized, even though it is a geopolitical entity alongside every other, and it's the only nation in the world where criticism of it is equated with a type of racism.
I think there is a certain paranoia of gentiles endemic to the Jewish psyche that has been embedded by centuries of ostracism, which in turn feeds the same cycle.
I took an extended break from writing while on vacation. To make sure I was still creatively exerting myself everyday I started drawing because it was easier/more time efficient to use a note book than deal with foreign power outlets. Trouble is I know that I'll only ever use my merger drawing ability for stupid shit I'm too embarrassed to commission and I feel like my writing ability as atrophied somewhat from the time off (I normally write every day.)
The point is that if you claim that a group is so diffuse that you can't police other members of that group, you can't turn around and show in group preference or nepotism; either you deal with people as an individual or as a member of a group, not whichever one tactically suits you in particular situations, Jews need to realize that they aren't "tricking" anyone when they do this, we notice. Either disavow the group or don't deny your membership
I know enough Jews to know that there is tremendous division and disagreement between them. They aren't a uniform bloc. However, this debate is very much internal, a matter between Jews, of which no one else is allowed to participate. That is where the nepotism rests, in the exclusivity of Jewish concerns. Not in a united conspiracy.
Stupid apologists. If anything, these posts are a sign of low intelligence and low discernment.
Zionism, the extreme tribalism, and the ethnophobic tendencies, the predisposition to neurosis, the inclination for deception and the cunning concomitant, the aptness for what we've come to know as "trade," the Jew exhibits - these are all inherent to this human type, and are the reason for anti-semitism, and not vice versa. Jews have an identity distinct from the rest of humanity, one conjured up, depending on your level of secularism, by the demiurge himself or by their cultural development. Either way, their ways are alien to the gentile, and they must be eradicated. There is nothing that can redeem them because they do not seek to be redeemed. This is why they are hated; you're low IQ to not see this.
>by the demiurge
Crackpot detected. Take your tinfoil hat off.
>or by their cultural development
>ignoring this point
Put on your yarmulke, heathen.
Get off /pol/ and go outside. Before your brain drips any further out of your ears.
1. Telling me to get off a board I do not frequent, nor is it the one we are currently on is nonsensical and non-sequitorial.
2. You have yet to make a coherent point.
Despair , It's a very unwelcome and terrible thing to experience. To give up all hope , and therefore any prospect of possible future improvement.
Unemployed , to be out of work but available. I dont have the fortitude for this. Every day i wake up i wish i hadn't . Every time i try justify getting up
i feel the pain of my feet and my some mornings. Almost unbearable. This does not aid my mental health. I feel stuck in limbo, are things meant
to get better? how and if so why? I don't control my fate. I put my pot of gold in the ground and hide it away. It will not grow or be stolen
It will lay in the hard ground . Hidden away
Dude eating loud crunchy tortilla chips out of a large loud paper bag on the floor and every time he takes a new chip to eat he reaches all the way down into the bag, then slowly eats the chip in several loud bites
I don't understand how the average person seemingly isn't aware of the people around them anymore. Some dude in front of me on a busy sidewalk today stopped abruptly, craned his neck up so he was looking at the sky, started horking exaggeratedly like a mother bird about to feed its young, spit a huge wad of spittle onto the sidewalk at his feet, and then just keep walking. Do we really need more of this? Is this what life is "for?" To breed more and more and more of these fucking unreflective, empty-headed pigs, so they can walk around drinking coffee milkshakes and being solipsistic nuisances?
What is the best argument against a balanced life?
Dedicating my self to work for altruism isn't that appealing when I start to factor in wanting time to raise children and wanting to enjoy life.
SHIT
It's soon 2 am. I'm reluctantly typing words in a thread on this dead site, I hate each press of my finger onto the keyboard.
The simple explanation is that I have not physically exhausted myself enough today, and now I'm paying the price, with storms raging inside late at night.
> tripfag
post checks out
>German
>French
>Italian
>Chinese
>Japanese
These are my foreign language options, which should I take? I'm thinking of teaching English overseas when I'm done with my degree. Leaning away from any of the Asian languages
I was reading some interviews with writers and one thing that stuck out to me after the fact was that they all had typewriters (either purchased themselves or as a gift) that would serve them for many, many years -- possibly decades. I then thought about how now a tool for writing not only shares real-estate with the tool for everything else, but also that it will need to be replaced wholesale.
I sometimes wonder if this lack of continuity and longevity has any impact.
I've spent most of the last week daydrinking and reading and watching Star Trek and Frasier. Still not sure how I feel about Next Generation.
>brainlet
post checks out
Your post alone pervades a distinct quality go on user.
>tfw you discover "tall lesbian dominating short lesbian" porn
See this is why it's unwise to have a trip, bubberfly. This will haunt you. Perhaps not this in particular but you know what I mean.
I would read a book filled to the brim with these banal nonsensical incidents that irritate the protagonist until he just commits suicide. Someone get on this.
My 2020 presidential platform
>Full pull out of ME military missions
>Full diplomatic break with both Israel and Saudi Arabia
>(Bring back gold/silver/possibly even crypto standard to combat inflation from price shocks after OPEC doesn't buy in dollars anymore)
>Dual citizens can't hold office
>End birthright citizenship
>raise taxes on capital gains
>Heavily tax and eventually ban uninhabited foreign owned real estate
>Federally insured minimum standard of health care, privately provided
>Flat tarrifs on manufactured goods
>End 5 eyes surveillance program
>End Patriot act
>End FICO courts
>Cancel SLS program, rechannel money into private aerospace contracts
>Tougher anti trust laws
>Tougher environmental laws
>Increased protections for whistleblowers
>Federal cannabis decriminalization
>Work with ISPs to limit access to pornography
>Make English the only official language
>Split Texas and Alaska into multiple states
>Ban non citizens from military
>Go after tax havens, eminent domain American founded companies that attempt to leave the country/change headquarters to out of country
>Mandate that foreigners can only make up to 10% of a graduating class of an tertiary education institute
>Tougher antitrust laws.
More like different antitrust laws.
david berman's death has really rocked me. ive never been so affected by a celebrity death
I've no idea who that is
Sorry to hear that friend
I think I just shit out all I've eaten in the past few days. Feels good but also kinda scary.
Same here, brother. All we can do now is listen to Silver Jews' best album The Natural Bridge.
I had a little insight into my nature. I realized it's time to accept my character and predispositions. No more betraying myself. I hope it's a start of a new chapter.
The male ego does not know anything about the female ego, and does not want nor can it know nothing about it. It merely projects a living image, in which it is appealed to by the collective unconscious (“es”), onto the surrounding socio-biological matter. The internal anima and external woman are for the male ego (logos) strictly one and the same. The anima is primary and that which does not coincide with anime in a woman is either not noticed, rejected, censored, or hated by the male ego. All of this has been tracked by psychoanalysts in millions of examples.
If the male anima is drawn to the figure of the Melusine (the water-inhabiting fairy-fish-woman with a tail and no genitals), then a mismatch in external women in relation to this standard will be presented as their fault, and not as the fault of the image (in which, in fact, there is nothing pathological - after all, such is harmoniously and tightly woven into the sacred lexicon of great dreams).
Parallel research has been conducted by Levi-Strauss in studying the structure of kinship. In the myths of many American tribes as well as other peoples of Africa and Melanesia or, more broadly, the whole world, the theme of a “proper scale of marriage” is recurrent. In order to show what is correct, a myth shows what is incorrect. There are countless, stable motifs concerning marriage with animals (Masha and the bear etc.), spirits, demons and angels (the Book of Enoch), objects, monsters, and so on. These are too distant of relationships, which means that the ego swung too far across the horizons of the unconscious and, as a rule, legends warn that nothing good comes out of this.
I'm a midwit. It would be unrational for me to listen to philosophers.
I think about the world in terms of mmorpgs. Most people do boring quests.
I look at the results I want to achieve and built my worldview on that.
I don't care if I'm wrong, I only care if what I do benefits me. Save your wisdom for after I'm dead.
I like to be friendly.
life sucks
This asexual girl I know asked if I would write fetish porn for her. What does it mean?
no it doesn't
you suck, life is great
My thesis is due in 4 weeks and I'm having an extreme recurrence of health anxiety. I've now convinced myself that I have cancer because I have a small, irregular lump on the back of my neck. When I get in this kind of mental state, I feel like I'm entering a tunnel, i can't see anything past the next week or day, and I can't imagine myself still existing in the future. In reality I've felt this way many times before and yet somehow I am still here in this moment so i try to acknowledge that and keep going.
i found the first part of this really funny
i would prefer to make sweet love to her from the front, with my tiny peen. as long as i can get the tip in, it will be fine.
Forgive the poor grammar and punctuation I'm going off the cuff here.
I've been exchanging photos with guys online at a disgustingly heighted rate recently, and while in the moment it feels good, afterwards I the self-loathing begins to surface. I feel like such a whore. I share with them my body, and honestly they act like they couldn't care less about me, I guess that just comes with the territory. The fear also comes with it. Imagine all the photos they have of me; what they could with them. If I ever were to make something of myself I'm afraid that this will come back to haunt me. I'm disgusting. I can hardly even get off to idea of guys, it's just that I like the attention. It's more than women have ever given to me. It's unhealthy and most of the time I feel as if I'm lying, but it beats feeling alone right?
One of the major problems is that In all this sexual confusion I came out to a lot of my family as Bi, mostly against my will mind you, if it were up to me I would have kept it all under wraps. So now I kind of feel obligated to be Bi because that's easier than explaining that I'm not really sure about my sexuality at all.
So either I look like a liar, or I become a liar. I just want some kind of physical contact, is that asking too much? What am I saying? Of course it is. I'm looking for external recognition from wherever I can find it. It's pathetic. eventually it will escalate to the point where I will physically be having sex with another guy and I will definitely know then where I stand sexually, but then will that turn into a string of one night stands, and eventually death by STI? Probably. I'm just looking for a quick solution to a problem that requires a lot of work to fix. Inpatience, that is my problem always has been. I guess I should end this, not like anyone would read this shit. No one ever does. I'm invisible even on a site where there are no identities
>I feel like such a whore
Because you are.
> If I ever were to make something of myself I'm afraid that this will come back to haunt me
Unlikely. At this point, almost everyone has skeletons of this kind in their closet that when the time comes, such "revelations" would be hardly shocking. Not to mention advances in deepfakes etc.
>So either I look like a liar, or I become a liar.
>I'm just looking for a quick solution to a problem that requires a lot of work to fix. Inpatience, that is my problem always has been.
A lot of guys indeed become gay/whores simply due to lack of genuine intimacy. This is more normal than you think. Casual sex won't make you happy though - it's the casual sex culture which erased vast amount of human capacity for intimacy in the first place.
When I was in this phase, I just got a pet to cuddle with.
I know a lot of people who lost all their baby pictures up to their latest five year lifespan device because they thought storing them digitally was way safer and smarter than keeping the hard copy which they ditched after scanning.
>whore
>Because you are
Whores get paid in more than attention. user's just slutting it up. Otherwise you're largely on point. Most people who are nonstraight now are not that way because of natural circumstances and it doesn't make them happy or fulfilled long term.
>One of the major problems is that In all this sexual confusion I came out to a lot of my family as Bi, mostly against my will mind you, if it
Me too, except it turns out my dad is bi too which explains a lot and brought us closer (in a non homo way, though we do have similar taste in hookers). For most people the problem is intimacy, like the other user said, and, to a degree, lack of maturity. Many of the bi/alternative sexualities I meet remind me of children, because their attitudes are kind of immature and if they did/do similar things while in a straight relationship, they are called out on their immaturity. I mean, basic shit like paying bills or personal responsibility above that of a petulant fifteen year old on the rag, not the more meme shit which is annoying too but wouldn't seem as childish if they didn't have problems with basic adult functioning. There is something really weird going on and it makes it harder to date seriously because you have to plow through so many people whose understanding of their sexuality is so slipshod that they probably can't form adult understandings of sex well enough to consent. It's really weird because they also talk a lot about consent and most of the talk about it makes me think
>Never sign a lease, contract or any legal document with this person, they do not understand the commitment or repercussions involved in being a legal adult
For everybody's sake, ask a normie of the opposite gender if you could hug or hold hands for a little bit, instead of feeding more of this memed garbage into my dating pool. You're stealing money from whores who want to make it and they don't need that market pressure.
>For everybody's sake, ask a normie of the opposite gender if you could hug or hold hands for a little bit
Unlikely to happen. I'm repulsive to women
I am a complete fool. The opportunity was there, has always been there, and at this moment the gate is shut to me. Yesterday I was feet away from that last sliver of light and I turned away, to go to some corner and be wrapped in myself.
Now things are changing. I will be alone for some time. The new world is screaming toward me and I am afraid to commit, to make any move that could be a misstep
All the better to pity hug you with. Enough pity hugs and you'll see women are not repulsed.
Women are a meme
Saving this to gawk at later.
Be patient and share you body online less, it clearly stresses you out. You'll find someone who cares about you in the real world if you keep trying.
Underrated gem, thank you
What do you think?
Dna does not define who is and isn't family.
Friends are temporary.
Relationships change for better or for worse.
Work is modern slavery.
Banks are evil.
We are bounded by our bodies, the earth and society as a whole.
The universe does not care about anything and you are a part of that.
Love is not knowing what youll do without it.
I understand most things but do not know or believe in anything.
I dont want to die.
Existence is strange.
Where am i going?
I'm in the same exact boat. I never wanted to be like this, but the longer I fight against myself, the longer I move nowhere. I have to move forward and live my own life, not someone else's. A new chapter began for me, and a new one for you. Don't fall back into old habits, nature takes you where you belong.
I recently had a bad dating experience, but I genuinely do not know if I did anything wrong. To be sure, I was confused and uncertain in some of my actions towards her, but the venomous way this woman went after me when I said that I wouldn't like to take things further, is making me wonder. I don't know what to think, lads.
...
What did you lads learn?
>I understand most things but do not know or believe in anything.
I believe some things and believe I know some things, but understand nothing.
Existence is strange indeed. What is this?
Praise Eris
Ill look him up
The only interaction I have with Mom nowadays is her nagging me or calling me selfish for not being a part of her religion, she's disowned every child she's had but me so far. Why did she have children in the first place? She obviously isn't interested in having relationships with them besides us kow-towing to her and letting her define *every* aspect of our lives.
I like that quote.
stop pretending to be me
Just some dream i wouldike to think
Just discovered him, though Yea Forums used to talk about him and his book (Principia Discordia) some years ago
Get your own
Something happened to me last Thursday when I was driving home. I had a couple of miles to go --
I looked up and saw a glowing orange object in the sky, to the east! It was moving very irregularly...
Suddenly, there was intense light all around me -- and when I came to, I was home.
What do you think happend to me...?
aylium secks
>13700334
>13702241 (Me)
>What did you lads learn?
>tl;dr second paragraph, I guess I'm Machiavellian
I learned that I'm not introverted, just horribly abused by both of my parents. When I spoke up to get my needs met, I was met with harsh retaliation, even at 4yo. I was conditioned to get everything I need myself without ever asking for help, but to also hide what my needs are. This caused a great resentment to form. I held myself to a forced-in moral standard where I cannot ask for help, I cannot ever be needy, and deviating from any of these two is met with emotional crucifixion. I forced myself to be meek, needless, unimportant, and entirely unnoticeable in social situations. In any situation where I need anything, I resorted to emotional manipulation so that I never had to ask for what I needed, but would receive it. I have forced myself to use this in a manner that is acceptable to the group I immersed myself in, to never use it in a way that they deemed morally unacceptable. I couldn't mention that I didn't eat this week, merely that I didn't have any energy for example.
The resolution, my new chapter, is to take everything that I want, fuck what other people say is good or bad because all they want is to see my downfall.
If I have to lie to my mother about having cancer so that she can pay me back the $500 I let her borrow 8 years ago, then at least I get what was mine. If I have to lie to my aunt that I tried to convince her son to not drive after I saw him drinking, how horrible I felt knowing I should have saved his life, so that she would listen to me when I start telling her how badly my parents abused me, telling her how abandoned I felt by them, knowing she went through the same thing with her parents, knowing she heard the same thing from her son that died, just so I can live in an upper middle class house instead of an abusive lower class household, at least I'm filling their needs for their lost son instead of just taking. I shouldn't consider myself good for tearing open horribly deep wounds in my aunt, but ultimately, I will say and do anything as long as it helps her because of how much she has to offer and how much she has helped me. If she is better because of my actions, and I am benefiting as well, who is to say that horrible lie and those horrible emotions that I dragged up was a bad thing? Who needs to know the truth when the lie is so much better for everyone? My father wants me dead, my mother wants to take everything that I've earned. If they are hurt by the fact that I'm chosen by better people to replace my parents, then everything I said about them will be further validated in my aunt's and uncle's eyes, they will only love me more and treat me better, and I will do more to perfectly fill the hole inside their soul.
The sun was setting
I could swear that with streaming, YouTube, and podcasts, people are moving back to an entirely oral, post-literate culture. Exclusively listening to people talk online, posting videos or streams of themselves talking, getting news and information from podcasts or "video essays" instead of reading it themselves. It's fucking eerie.
Like, have a look at this shit:
youtube.com
This guy spends a half-hour just summarizing plot points from Harry Potter. No commentary, insight, or even jokes, just recounting the plot with minimal video editing.
It has 3.5 million views, for shit you could probably read on a fan wiki. But people would rather spend a half-hour hearing a droning nerd voice recite it at them.
How long until you get used to wagecucking? It's been 5 years now and it's just getting worse.
It's a friend simulator culture. You get home from a rough day at a pointless job, you sit down to "watch something just while I'm eating!," and two hours go by as you watch Youtube videos of faggots playing multiplayer games you don't even play, or reviewing old FPS games from 1998, or describing the community drama of some speedrunning or fighting game tournament (for games you also don't play). It's easier than reading when your mind is totally fucking sapped of energy from selling doodads to niggers all day, or whatever it is you do.
One thing I've noticed about this fucking degenerate post-human "Youtuber culture" is that everyone is a mushmouthed fucking retard who blends idioms and turns of phrase together. Every time I'm watching one of these videos, I inevitably hear them talking like a real life version of that "diamond dozen, it's a doggy dog world" copypasta, where all the English idioms are fucked up and distorted. They constantly use words that sorta sound like the word they intended to use, like "weary" for "wary" or "antedated" for "antiquated." I can't stand this gay planet any longer. The mongrelization is even taking place at the level of language. Not just people, but thought itself has become one big nigger mulatto chinaman, with sloppy smacking wet lips, shucking and jiving around while he tries to sell me a membership to "Skillshare." If I hear one more fucking lumpenprole twentysomething Englishman who can't FUCKING PRONOUNCE NASAL CONSONANTS going "Hey guys weldum to anudda' vibbeo dis doiyme Oi'll be pla'in' on Harbcorb dibbiculby" I think I'm going to go insane.
"Come on men! This land thirst for the blood of heroes!"
I want to be honest with myself: I want to write schlock, I want to write dumbshit stories like the ones you see in anime, I want to have fun writing a story even if it's just some retarded LN/Harry Potter shit.
I don't mean not putting in the effort, I mean putting in the effort to make some dumbass YA fiction piece that people can enjoy. I want it to have some deep shit or something just to make it a little bit more interesting, but I'm tired of forcing my own writing to be gritty and "realistic". Fuck I just want to write a story about magical girls, why can't I let myself have fun?
Underrated kek
seek antidepressants if only as a stopgap
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Fuck!
My leftist friends are starting to give me the stinky eye... What do?
Pic very related
have you considered not being retarded?
We want to be the final evolution. If it turns out our greatgrandkids are, we have to admit being usurped by time rather than God.
i need rpg items/plots/anything ideas, please?
The perfect is the enemy of the good.
everyone is getting a gf now except me, I'm still hugless, kissless and handholdless
I don't drink alcohol which is a big disadvantage in this case since that rules out even trying clubs etc
what should I derive from this?
son of a bitch didn't give me a flag. I guess I'm too hesitant on a lot of issues
It's too hot.
The planet loomed in the dark abyss, still and silent like an insect caught in amber. The starlight diffused over the surrounding ring system and upper atmosphere, obscured by clouds, preventing anything to be discerned moving below them. Our destination finally realized, we set course for the largest moon currently hidden in the other side of the planet.
Wait hold the fuck on. Space isn't on just one axis. So some of the planets would be "above" and "below" not just to the sides. Why in the fuck do all the maps of space imply the planets are on the same axis?
The 8 planets are on the same equatorial plane, so they’re always in the same stretch of the sky, the same one that the sun and moon move in, because of the tilt of the earth’s axis.
there is no above or below, there's just space
:)
Lookup "solar declension"
*clears throat*
ExCuSE mE????
A God with power has always desired sacrifice from his subjects and followers. Sacrifice of parents and children even. A God desires your own parents as proof of your devotion.
I have wasted a decade of my life doing nothing. Now I must endure a long humilliation amd estrangement from everyone I know once all my lies fall apart. I hope it's worth it and I manage to rescue a semblance of the life I should have had at 22 at 30.
You'll be alright man, even if it's six feet under. You'll be alright.
I started reading the Odyssey since I have a break before school starts. I'm happy that I picked Lattimore's translation - it flows a lot more smoothly than the one I read for the Iliad.
I genuinely hope one day you feel even a fraction of the pain I feel. There is no death harsh enough for you.
Your hope is for nothing. My suffering is greater than yours. What then?
How do I get voice? Why do I write so shit and not notice? How come some people get to be shit and successful at the same time?
writing is hard
I really think you do not get it. You do not know about us. You do not know how much we shared. I am certainly not blameless but you all have just piled on and on. Do I really deserve it all?
You deserve nothing, as do I. I was born an irregular that must live despite it. What hell could you give me that I have yet to feel?
It's taken me a long time to realize this, but women are completely ignorant of what they actually want. They want to be led. That's all, that's the whole of women: they want someone to be in charge of them.
Sometimes they'll claim they don't but it's in bad faith and insincere
I don't think I will ever read a book in English a decade or less from now. By then I hope to only read books written in Scots.
I would change the "like an insect caught in amber" part, it just seems too cliche. Make a new smile.
True. The same is true for men. sad
Based. Scots is a based language.
You saw the chosen one (trump)
I don't disagree, most men want to be led too, the problem is that someone actually has lead at some point to make that chain possible, and that person is always a man. Responsibility I guess, never hear the feminists talking about that