I C'd all of my A-levels. All my life I was told I am smart and destined for greatness, so every time I underachieved I assumed that there was some external influence causing me to perform below my true ability. But this time it was different. This time I have no excuse. I studied and genuinely tried hard but still came up short.
In many ways I am like Tom from East of Eden; a man who was overestimated by everyone around him, constantly told he was a great, every reservation and lack of initiative on his part was reinterpreted as being a latent sign of greatness by his father, but in reality he was a midwit. And so, like Tom, this inflated perception of myself has been permanently embossed onto my psychology, meaning that I hold a veritable contempt for mediocrity and will never be able to accept myself as a midwit, even though that is what I am. My psychologist tells me I should work towards an acceptance of "who I am", not understanding that the gap between who I am and who I wish to be is so great as to send me pummelling into the dark pit below if I were to attempt to leap over it. As a result I see no other way forward for me to go except to do what Tom did.
Anyway, I don't deserve to clog up the board with my blogposts, so let's make this a general write what's on your mind thread.
do i tell a girl i am a virgin? i don't want to scare her off. it would be easier if i could admit i am a virgin.
Samuel Lee
Some girls like that
Justin Sullivan
If you believe you’re a midwit because you couldn’t satisfy extremely tight and arbitrary exam specifications then perhaps you really are a midwit. Intellect is measured by what you can do, what you can produce - not how well you can satisfy the UK education system. Chin up, user. Keep reading, keep writing; make a difference.
Jeremiah Scott
Fuck, I meant plumetting, not pummelling. Just another sign of my braineltism.
Chase Taylor
You're gonna kill yourself because you got mediocre grades on some tests? Well, it's your choice. But maybe take a moment to consider that the world's perception of you and all its countless judgements and conceptions of yourself are completely independent from your own experience and consciousness. There is still more to your life than you can perceive, more than death anyway, which is by definition nothing. Get up from where you've fallen and keep walking even when you're tired, try to find that which makes life beautiful, if you've ever seen it before you started measuring life by other's sight then you know what I'm talking about, if you haven't then you have the rest of your life to find it, no reason at all to leave beforehand.
Logan Ortiz
I understand this well, though unlike you I have never worked hard at anything in my life, partially to avoid the feeling that you're feeling now. Confronting your own mediocrity is a deeply scary thing. I feel the day I finally do it will be my last. Godspeed user.
Hudson Campbell
Well, depends on some factors such as your age and level of intimacy. If you are younger than 22 and you have known her for 1 year or so, then probably yes but it's still not guaranteed that she will ghost you. If you feel like being honest then tell her anyways, you will see whether she's a decent a girl based on her reaction.
Easton Myers
>Hey guys I'm a Retard >But don't let that fact stop you from reading my pseudointellectual blog post wall of text
