I get it user, I dare say that I'm in a similar situation. (as the other user mentioned, I will expand a little):
- Do not overthink this, you will only get into paranoia and people will notice this, that is, they might think that because you hate the ideology that you are a right-wing supremacist or that you hate group X, do not overthink but be very careful! (or worse, you yourself might get into so much paranoia that you will doubt yourself, trust yourself).
- Be extremely chill about it. Don't try to be provocative, even IF they deserve it. Show genuine curiosity, or play it till it's genuine curiosity (nobody who knows the truth and flaws of an ideology has it easy and wants to play this part of genuine interest, but you have to do it here, it's borderline psychopathic, but you have to take into account with who you are dealing with).
- Ask real questions and stick to your field, do not mention biology or natural science (or talk of it as such because they might, for some absurd reason) think, again, that you are some kind of supremacist; instead use quotes and talk about facts: "What would she say to the argument that...", "The Harvard professor S.Pinker writes that, how does this correlate?"
- Stick with the classics. This cannot be stressed enough. These people love Mill, Locke, Rousseau, Freud and Kant, even though they use them to drive their own ideology. Show them that you have read these works, and beat them at their own game. Then ask them questions they don't know. For instance, if they give you some Kant, ask them then or say: "Didn't Hegel explain this better or refute this?" or with Freud or Lacan: "Does not modern neuroscience disprove this?" And read Marx's "Kapital", because, chances are they haven't read it or have skimmed through it. Some Max Weber and classical sociology like Giambattista Vico, that they haven't read, will help. You haven't read ALL the classics, BUT present your arguments in such a way that you have properly understood them, and that they cannot refute your argument.
- Give them arguments they don't expect.
Try to bring up classical metaphysical works/arguments along the lines of Neoplatonism, Plato, Buddhism, Taoism into the game, because chances are they don't know or are not interested in this, they only care and know about "social constructive materalism", so give them something they don't expect -- they are not interested in universal metaphysical things. They will end up confused.
- Use texts from classical feminist literature or some kind of classical socialist working class left, works you actually agree with (trust me, these do exist, you just have to find them). Some suggestions: the goddess Camille Paglia (Sexual Personae) , Simone de Beauvoir, Iris Murdoch, Simone Weil, Rosa Luxemburg.
++ Martha Nussbaum wrote a harsh essay against Butler. faculty.georgetown.edu/irvinem/theory/Nussbaum-Butler-Critique-NR-2-99.pdf