*sigh* somehow Skynet has returned
*sigh* somehow Skynet has returned
Julian Cooper
Grayson Gray
Terminator goes back in time to get john conner back in shape.
>its a comedy and it writes itself
Michael James
Me in the back
Brandon Walker
>ron jeremy as the latest terminator
Skynet keeps making these terminator models more sexually alluring each time
Eli Jones
>A man who was meant to be a hero has his destiny changed and as a result is now a lazy alcoholic slob.
Could be kino.
Adam Evans
A truly daring synthesis
David Scott
How can he be a leader of a resistance? If he can't even resist a cheeseburger?
Luis Gray
Is that Ron Jeremy?
Oliver Adams
I hope ole Ron talks eddie into doing a terminator 2 porn parody.
Levi Martinez
>opening shot of downtown san francisco
>influencers with soi lattes merrily jump over homeless lying in the gutters
>fade to black
>hard men
>create good times
>back to the street, zoom on the luminescent laughing faggot snapping selfies with his hags
>fade to black again
>good times
>create weak men
>back to influencers doing their best kardashian impressions
>fade to black
>weak men
>create hard times
>nuke goes off above alcatraz
>john connor wakes up in his pod
>he grabs his macbook and saunters over to the liquid chow stand
>no credit
>please avi can you stretch my credit i'm gonna freelance as fuck today
>gets two milkshakes and goes to the deskshare building
>sits down, opens up freelancer dot com
>private message from hows@yourmother
>did you really think that killing dyson would change anything?
>macbook catches fire
>john connor runs down the stairs, colliding with estrellita salceda
>whoa, gordito - not so pequeno anymore, eh? come on, we got work to do.
Christopher Harris
No it's edward furlong
Benjamin Brown
>be Edward Furlong
>hear Cameron is doing a 3rd Terminator movie
>Arnie is back
>Linda Hamilton is back
>realise there's no way they won't be bringing John Connor back
>"This is it."
>"This is my moment."
>"This is what I've been waiting for."
>get out of bed
>dust off the old boombox and hit play
>"yewwwww could be miiiine!"
>feeling motivated as fuck
>open curtains
>pour 47 bottles of cheap vodka down the sink
>about to dump cocaine down the toilet, but remember you snorted it all last night
>vomit
>shit
>shit while vomiting between your legs onto the shit
>actually use mouthwash instead of drinking it
>cry
>vomit
>go to the bank
>take out every remaining penny you own
>$1,462
>pay for a year long gym membership
>can't afford rent
>lose your apartment
>sleep in your car
>work out for 4 hours a day
>use gym to shower and shit
>survive on the remnants of kale shakes other gym members leave behind
>7 months later
>lean and muscular
>boyish good looks have returned
>haven't cried in 19 days
>call in a few favours and get an audition for James fucking Cameron's new Terminator flick
>walk into audition room
>James is astounded
>his nose is trembling
>"My God. Eddie, is that you? You look fantastic! But how? We thought you were at death's door!"
>look him dead in the eye and give a sly smile
>"The whole thing goes: The future's not set. There's no fate but what we make for ourselves."
>whole room erupts
>cheers
>hollers
>everyone's on their feet
>James is chanting, "BRAVO! BRAVO!"
>"We got Skynet by the balls now, don't we?"
>someone passes out
>James is crying
>I can't believe what's happening
>I've never been so happy
>"So, Jimmy. Do I got the job, or do I got the job?"
>"Yeah. We need to scan your face for reference, we're klling John in the new one."
Ryder Barnes
That's literally John in T3
Zachary King
what, is that really the kid from t2? and ron jeremy lmao.
Juan Sanders
Feel pretty bad for Furlong. Loved watching his movies as a kid. He was manipulated and statutory raped by his tutor Jacquelin Domac.
Christopher Wilson
The picture that saved Yea Forums.
Michael Cruz
>domac 26 yo
>furlong 13 yo
Damn I wish that were me
Colton Fisher
imagine sticking ur dick inside her when all the other crew members have been using her before you.
Lucas Myers
they should never have replaced Edward in the third movie. beginning of the end for the franchise .all the emotional weight that was generated in the second movie was lost the minute he wasn't on screen.
Jaxson Sanders
and more devious
Sebastian Hughes
Well if he fell in love with a hoe, it's that she was a hoe. Has nothing to do with waah boo hoo i was at such an impressionable young age, i thought she loved mehh! I was raaapeed!
Even at 13 I knew what a hoe was. I was listening to the geto boys back then.