*lies*

JOE ROGAN I SWEAR TO FUCKIN GOD THIS PUERTO RICAN GIRL'S MONKEY TASTED LIKE FUCKIN ELMER'S GLUE

You know how to tell when a cuban is lying? their mouth is open.

>LEMME TELL U SOMETHIN JOE ROGAN I'LL TELL U BACK IN EIGHTY THREE I SHIT MY PANTS SO HARD IT RIPPED RIGHT TRU MY PANTS I'M TELLING U JOE ROGAN IT STUNK LIKE A FUCKIN DEAD BAHHDY JOE ROGAN

based

MR. LEE WATCH OUT HES GOING TO GRA-

>NOOOOOOOO DONT MAKE JOKES ABOUT IT
HOLY shit, eat shit

TELL ME LIES TELL ME SWEET LITTLE LIES

dilate you seethign alt-right tranny

Blue cheese with wings or go fuck your mother.

Alt-right trannies are the best though.

>Joey is only 4 years older than Joe
Christ. Drugs really are bad.

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I'm going to dilate your anus and throat with the ole fuck and suck you buzzword spouting retard

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Joe Rogan da fuckin 80s were insane, and I mean 80mya in the fuckin late Cretaceous period Joe Rogan. I was in Chicago visiting my uncle fester doing the Mamushka when some motha fuckin Gypsy gave us a monkey paw and damnit Joe Rogan, my uncle fester wished he could see a dinosaur so next thing we know I’m standin next to a fuckin 3 foot mosquito 82 million fuckin years ago and here comes dis triceratops lookin motha fucka and he says “yo let’s do some blow” and this dude had some crazy coke joe Rogan so we got fucking ripped with a triceratops. I swear to god joe Rogan next thing I know this T. rex motha fucker just eats the fuck outta my uncle fester and triceratops is freakin out, tweaked on Dino-coke so I get da fuck outta there. Goddamn Joe Rogan the 80mya’s were crazy.

lemme tell you sumthin joe rogan, back in the eighties i was workin as a cop, and i was stayin in some fancy ass skyscraper, when dese german cocksuckas invaded the place, and i took em out one by one.

Trussell is the only reason I come back to watch the show. The guys a total fucking lunatic but I love him so much.

Jamie pull up that T. rex with the feathers
Goddamn that could rip you apart

Jamie pull up the picture of those sand worms
Goddamn those could eat you whole

>Be comedian
>Lie

so like every single comedian

Well, what do you expect ?
That he can repeat "kidnapping Vella" story for over 30 years?!

I personally cut him some slack, he was an Hollywood nobody,lowlife(even worse, he was one of those fucks who waited in bars(mostly Coach & Horses) to someone buys him a drink).

But, with all that said, I would give a nice amount of money to have a drinking/coke night with him and Stanhope.

Shame hack like Rogan became literally 21 ct. Joe Christ! He is shitty comedian, he IS really stupid(I like when he says:"Don't say me any spoiler alerts!!"... It's spoilers, you literal bald chimp.

P.S.
Every post I make turns into a fucking meme or a way people start thinking, what's that about?!

>Is just a couple of years older than Joe Rogan but looks like he's at least 20 years older.

Jaime pull up that picture of me butt naked on all fours in the garage
Goddamn that thing would tear you to shreds

yeah,nah..
jOE IS HEALTH FREAK, he never smoked, let alone used something stronger..
That's all it takes,NOT TAKING SHIT!

His bit of plugging in computer jargon into the Bible texts to pretend profundity is so childish i cant stand to listen to it

More like fatness is really bad

>he never smoked
he has smoked cigarettes before and he smokes cigars often

Joe I shit you not, when I was in Houston my motha gave me a BB gun for my birthday and first time I shot it out in a grassy knoll I hit that motha fucking President Kennedy right in the head. Goddamn joe Rogan I had to lay low after that one

Explain?
Kek.

>calls out Joe Rogan for having shitty weed

youtube.com/watch?v=WhkgnD8JTI4&t=9s

>only 4 years older
And Joe believes all bull shit about "it was th 80s dude" he says?

Agree'd. Joe's bad for shit like that too with his whole "the burning bush was DMT dude!" shit.

I don't understand why people who don't believe a word of the bible try to make it rational.

I think it was Pascal who said something to the effect of "people would rather turn wine back into water then appreciate the original miracle"

BASSEDD

Joe Rogan's actual friends whom he has on the show regularly are all dumb as hell.

New York City in the 80s was fucking wild bro. You know I love you man, I'd never lie to you.

Joe Rogan back in 1984 I met David copperfield in Chinatown behind a rub n tug where the stinky chinks would rub your cock like they were polishing a fuckin diamond. Joe Rogan I shit you not David copperfield was makin a machine like in the movie The Prestige so we put my coke in there and motha fuckin disappeared so I jump in after my coke and goddamn Joe Rogan I got sent back to the year 33. Well there was this son of a bitch standing there turnin water into wine and so I’m like “yo motha fucka turn this sand into coke” but he bitches out like a bitch so I fuckin went over to this Roman guard and turned this fucker in. I even got a bag of gold Joe Rogan, it was fucked up. Last I heard he was in a fuckin tomb and escaped, Jesus was a fuckin crazy bastard.

Joe grew up as a rich spoiled as fuck kid, of course he believes it

Go fuck yourself Rogan has been a fighter his whole life that's how he overcame his rough childhood.

I know, his rich parents paid his classes.

JOE ROGAN I SWEAR TO CHRIST BACK IN THE 1780s I FOUGHT OFF THE BRITISH AND FORMED THE US. ME AND BEN FRANKLIN WOULD GET FUCKED UP AND FUCK THE STINKIEST SLAVES ON THE FARM JOE ROGAN

HA! HA! HA! HA!

Cringe
Aykroyd is the truth

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Ben Franklin was actually known for loving prostitutes, and spent his time in France fucking whores and getting drunk.

Based in MY book!

Watching Joe Bon Jovi Rogan kiss the ass of unfunny comics and anyone with current celebrity status while acting flippant and outright rude to anyone he happens to disagree with makes this shit unwatchable. He's a brown noser and an asshole.

listen here joe rogan, I can sit here and admit that I ran through bitches with no regard for nothing, stds, pregnancy, i took a fucking chance. But the other day I was sitting with my little girl and was reminiscing of all the girls I’ve fucked since the age of 10. How reckless were we? You think I want that for her joe rogan? I would do anything for her to escape the influence of these little cocksuckers. But ultimately my influence can only spread so far Joe Rogan. So I do what my Dad used to do. Walk naked around the house so she can be repulsed by the male figure, if I can turn my little girl into a ball busting bull dyke then I did my job as a parent joe rogan

Jamie pull up King George III
Jesus that thing would tear you to pieces

So accurate. The Bible is an all or nothing text, you cant piece out what you like and twist around what you dont.

>>only 4 years older
>And Joe believes all bull shit about "it was th 80s dude" he says?

He's locked in a perpetual "I'm 16 and this cool 20 year old is telling me wild stories about how the world works wow bro" relationship.

Gullible retard 4 lyf.

>watching Dog That Saved Halloween with 4yo nephew
>Joey fucking Diaz is one of the main bad guys

I’ve never heard him talk about that. I don’t know if he’s done other movies or shows. If he doesn’t think being in movies is worth mentioning, it makes me think his other stories are more possible.

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>Start rewatching Sopranos
>Joey Diaz was there all along

What the fuck?

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>watch Spider-Man 2
>there he fucking is

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introspective joey>

He was in that Adam Sandler remake of The Longest Yard and he often keeps looking back at it as the moment he did done make it. He was basicaly an extra but still.

He's on the upcoming Sopranos prequel wich is way more substantial and prestigious.

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I remember him mentioning it.
JOE ROGAN I WAS IN THIS FUCKIN DOG MOVIE AND I SWEAR JOE ROGAN WE MUSTA GONE THROUGH FORTY DAMN DOGS IN A MONTH. YOU EVER SEE A DOG ON COKE JOE ROGAN? THEY FUCKIN GO NUTS. ME AND BIG HARV WOULD BLOW COKE IN THE DOGS NOSE AND DO POPPERS THEN RUB IUR NUTS IN PEANUT BUTTER. THEY FUCKIN LOVED IT. HARV PUT A FUCKIN STEAK IN HIS ASS AND LET A COLLIE GO TO TOWN UNTIL THEIR HEARTS GAVE OUT OH FUCK JOE ROGAN BEST NUT OF MY LIFE. WED THROW THEM INTO THE RIVER AT NIGHT CUZ BURYING A CUM COVERED DOG IS A FUCKING DOWNER LET ME TELL YOU JOE ROGAN

>He's on the upcoming Sopranos prequel wich is way more substantial and prestigious.

He was supposed to be in the original Sopranos, but they didn't hire him because of rumors he was a hard drug addict (he was). If anything, his hard drug use is likely what prevented him from getting a lot of work during the 2000's when he could have taken off as a big star.

KEK

best post itt

why does he always call joe by his full name?

*hits pipe*

Can we get more introspective joey?

JOE ROGAN BACK IN THE EIGHTIES I WAS SEEING THIS MAYAN CHICK DOWN IN THE YUCATÁN AND SHE WOULD LET ME BLOW MY LOAD RIGHT ON HER EYE BALL JOE ROGAN AND I WOULD THINK ABOUT ALL THOSE LITTLE JOEYS DOWN THERE AND THEY ARE ALL LOOKIN INTO HER ANCIENT ASS JUNGLE SOUL AND I WONDERED IF THEY COULD SEE INTO THE PAST AND ALL THE ANCIENT GENERATIONS OF MANKIND LIKE WHEN THE MAYANS WOULD STARE INTO THE STARS
DATS WHEN I STARTED TO CUM IN HER ASS JOE ROGAN IT WAS TOO DEEP FOR ME SO I WENT DEEP AND RAW DOGGED HER ASS UNTIL IT WAS BIGGER THAN THE GULF OF MEXICO JOE ROGAN

lel

JOE ROGAN BACK IN 1967 WHEN I WAZ FOUR YEARS OLD I FUCKED YOUR MOTHA I SHIT YOU BOT JOE ROGAN YOU ARE ACTUALLY LIL JOEY DIAZ JR

*inhales*