A scene shows character under the shower

>a scene shows character under the shower
>he doesn't put his hand between his cheeks to clean his anus

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if anyone replies that they dont do this, this is why no one stands near your vicinity

Uhhhhh....is this something people actually do? I sorta let gravity do it's things and wipe off with a towel. Am i stupid? Genuine question

I fuck myself with the soap bar.
I used strong H&S shampoo as lube for stroking my dick for years as a kid. Now I got no sensitivity in my cock head.

>characters having sex in a bed
>they're under the sheets
>woman wears a bra for some reason
>later, woman makes a reference to preferring cut jewdicks and that intact aka "uncircumcised" penises are "weird"

get a load of the teacher's pet

I a swab a soapy washcloth in my crack, not my bare hands.

>I used strong H&S shampoo as lube for stroking my dick
Doesn’t that sting?

I do same's
Problems weren't

Putting my hand in my hairy ass is gross and also gay

I also wear the same underwear for days at a time. I live with my gf (who isn't a slob) and she doesn't care.

ill b ur pet daddy uwu

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I also do this, plus I stick the washcloth inside my anus a bit to make it extra cleab

Yea but it made my dick feel super minty. Like it was freezing while it burned.

>character doesn't spend first five minutes of the shower popping the weird growths and pimples between his thighs

>not having a shitty ass is gay
Not surprised you live in a trailer park.

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Don't know if it's common, but I think it's the only proper way to do it. I usually even put my index finger a centimeter-two into my butthole while it's still soaped for better and more thorough cleaning, but that's not necessary of course.

Can it, sweetheart!

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I got a hairy ass. I have to get up in there or else my butt smells like old toxic sweat.

>scene shows a character pissing after waking up
>his piss isn't red and he isn't screaming in pain until he's done
Do movies even try to be believable?

Interesting

I wanna facefuck thotjack

Do you guys stand up or sit to wipe your ass?

I do it, I also shave my ass, because if you dont it smells more

you have a shitty stinky ass yet have a gf, how fat is she?

how does he even keep a gf being so stinky?

>not bending over, spreading cheeks, and letting the hot water directly hit anus
user....

If you use a washcloth, you are a black person. White people do not do that... we would if we were black though. No one wants a nigger to touch their anus. White hands are ok. Some asian ones too.

Is stand up. Look at my shitlog, and look at every shitwipe.

If you think water is enough, then you're horribly mistaken. You have to soap it also.

Based and correct

I'm not stinky, stop projecting shartmart. I just know how to clean my ass when I shit.

She's average build, typical woman who doesn't work out but doesn't overeat eirher.

based clune

What

Whenever I take a shit, I look down out of curiosity, and to see whether its bleeding or not.
I'm fucking horrified every time, you just dont expect it to be that big

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based stinky greaseball

You won't smell it unless you're eating their ass. I'm surrounded by hundreds of disgusting 250lb+ Americans that can't properly bathe, and they only smell like sweat at worst. To smell like literal shit, you need to crap your pants.

I want for so many women to shit in my mouth

black people use wash cloths. Most white people do no. White skin is cleaner than a rag, whereas black people are made out of nigger, so use a wash cloth.

Based

I use my hands. A wash cloth seems dirtier to use, I feel like you’d have to wash it after every use but if you use your hands you can just wash them instantly

It started like that, then I started putting my toothbrush in my butt.

I hate that the only solution to stop bleeding from your ass is to go completely empty except for a fruit every once in a while when I start feeling lightheaded

I just wash my hair, squat down and let the soap water and gravity do its job. I can feel it thanks to terrible anal fissues.

Washing between their ass cheeks? Yeah, this is something people do.

Whenever I look at it I measure it by how many cock lengths it is.
That big shit came out of my ass. I could do anal porn easy.

Whats that diet called? The one where you only eat to get rid of the headache you get from not eating

My diet

Its called being a retard. Its lost me 20 pounds over the course of 2 months so far

that's the al/ck/ diet my nigga.

Based retard

buy yourselves some disposible latex gloves you filthy shitasses

>not manually digging into your anus to get rid of turd remnants
amateurs

user are you trying to tell me that you like fingering your asshole with your bare hands?

It's a lot of work to get your whole arm in there. It's very physical, but also very emotional- very spiritual- I feel.

Who /stand2wipe/ here?

I use the soap bar between my cheeks and put the corner in my anus to clean it. Then I rinse it off with my hand.

One time, I used the bottom end of a toothbrush with a wipe over it to clean my asshole in the shower when I was very young.

good lord

Can I use that toothbrush pls?

T-Terry?

based and samepilled

No my mother threw them away when she replaced them with new brushes.
Happens every 2-3 months

ah-bloo-bloo

I'll also go the extra mile and penetrate/wipe the whole anus area with a soapy finger until my anus stops smelling like ass.

Is this the Kino thread?

I use one of these and floss my ass crack and gooch area like Mr. Krabs

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youtu.be/ZX5MHNvjw7o

me, my dick is too long so I dont want it to touch the water where my shit is.

I don't do this because I need to use that wash cloth on my pits and body and benis too. It just seems too gross to me to go in the anal region and then anywhere else.

>a scene shows character under the shower
>he doesn't masturbate while crying

how can you tell how it smells?

get a dedicated ass floss loofah like me

This

kek

>character can masturbate standing up
Is this common?

looks a little rough for my nether region

“Yes”

It’s the same as fucking while standing

you should put creaming foam for shaving in your balls and dick, it makes them warmer.

Is it not kinesthetically possible for you to masturbate standing up user?

I can't coom while standing. For whatever reason, I need to be sitting or lying down. Only once could I do it.

Based as fuck, dicklets just don't get it.

have you got anal roids?

Washing my ass crack always makes me raw down there.

Interesting

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Have more diarrhea

Bidet after wiping and a washcloth under the shower is my usual routine. Are bidets uncommon in the US? I can't take a shit if there isn't something I can use to wash my ass after the fact.

i want a fucking bidet. used one in spain once, shit was cash. not common in usa, no

This it's ultimately pointless to jerk off in the shower standing up. Takes me like 45 minutes.

Wimp

Maybe it's the hot water, I dunno. One time I had sex in the shower and I banged a girl for like an hour before cooming. I guess it's good for that at least.

Is it a jew writing the script that causes this?
I remember watching an episode of Venture Bros and Orpheus's master is talking about having to clean under the foreskin with a q-tip

u fat user?

>scene where the character masturbates
>he uses a tissue
>doesn't just jack off under the blanket and roll into the mess so it dries during his sleep

Movies are too afraid to be realistic nowadays

>Cleaning his ass is gay
How long have you been on no fap for now user? Surely you'd never touch your own penis like a faggot

I think it's just how comfortable you are. Lying in bed while slightly sleepy will produce the best coom, because you're relaxed. Standing in a shower, no matter how warm, isn't that comfy.

literally me

Never used a tissue before. I just pinch my foreskin, carry it to the toilet and dump it.

lol

I find the water distracting, have to beat my dick raw to coom

My guess is that they are trying to do that thing where the characters talk casually about explicit things just like in real life so that you relate to them more and they feel real, at least as far as your mother eaching a Netflix original is concerned. They probably need to talk about their cocks under such circumstances, and they are cut, but the only thing you can dicuss about being cut is comparing and contrasting to uncut.

Don't you guys just have a shower where you can remove the shower head and just shoot water right into you anus to clean it off real good with no scrubbing or brushes involved? You shoot the water from about 6 inches away on the powerful setting

Has anyone tried putting soap on a dildo and using that to clean their ass?

>and she doesn't care.
Oh trust me, she does care. It just happens that in your current situation, you're providing something that she's dependent on, so she will stay her mouth. If she was the bread maker in your house, you'd be scrubbing that ass so hard that it'd put babies bottoms to shame.

>He doesn't nut onto his own thigh to measure his cooum strength and reach as well as goop amount before cleanup

>nutting on your thigh
Is your dick a banana?

>not taking showers so hot your entire body goes red
pathetic

Thought I was the only one

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I usually soap my anus ring, then insert the shower hose inside my ass, with very small amounts I shoot hot water inside my ass and then shit it out. 2-3 cycles of that and my ass is clean, at least the first chamber between the anus and the second sphincter.

Do you use a tissue turban? Or do you hold a load of tissue nearby your cock head hoping to catch the load?

I do though. I turn the heat down after I use shampoo so I don't fuck my hair though.

user, if you actually do that, it's not good for your skin.

Does your boyfriend appreciate it?

I coom pretty hard and then take a paper towel that I had before I started then wipe myself off and my dick off then flush it down the toilet so it doesn't smell and my girlfriend doesn't know I was jerking off to doujins.

don't use soap. There's a reason why enemas don't have soap.

I condition first (no shampoo) and then ramp up the heat

Skin seems pretty normal besides a dry face desu

The smell enters the air. Spray a strong air freshener if you really want to mask it, or just be upfront with your girlfriend that you fap to drawings. If she's really offended, she's retarded and should be dumped.

Enemas burn far more than soap
>t. i’m not going into further detail

>not using the shower head to blast your asshole clean

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In the shower, I use a water-activated gel cleanser, then a honey-almond body
scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb mint facial masque which I leave on for ten minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after-shave lotion with little or no alcohol because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye
balm, followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.

>The smell enters the air
how... smelly does semen get

I was playing Catherine Full Body the other day and she was watching me and I told her I thought Katherine was "pretty". She thought it was weird that I thought drawings could be "pretty" but yeah, maybe she does know I like hentai.

I don't really care I've been on this site for like 15 years I was set up since a teen to like anime girls. I'm not a waifufag though, I just like some doujins like Slut Girl for example taht I first read on newgrounds.

>cant coom unless sitting down
>dont understand washing yourself
kill yourselves, seriously

>not just getting a colostomy bag so you don't need to shit
fucking casuals

As if you'd know her better, lol get out of here
Sorry you can't land a chick who wouldn't be anal about that shit

I really suggest not putting paper towels in the toilet. It will royally fuck up your pipes. Seriously.

Extremely so. Buy a can of febreeze and blast it every time if you have people that come into your cooming space.
Cooming standing up is alien. It's not even natural.

Then should I use tissue paper?

For me it's adjusting the shower head to jet stream then bending over and spreading my cheeks so it's like a faux bidet. I always do this after every shit and for each shower because not only it is hygienic but because it feels good.

Pro tip: you smell like shit

If you need to flush it down the toilet, use toilet paper. Otherwise, get ready to call the plumber in a few months.

Alright thanks bro. Will do.

Based boys unite

real patricians use sea sponges to get cleaned

This board is awful

>there are literally people who not only don't wipe properly, but have washrags that they stick in that same asshole and use it over and over and over

why?

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>a scene shows character waking up and getting in the shower
>he doesn't piss on his feet

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