>J-Lo's whoremaster Oscar bid Hustlers is Hollywood's latest female revenge #MeToo movie
>Hustlers has shallower roots than any Madonna film or music video. It’s a piece of unoriginal indoctrination, pushing the new vengeful wave of self-promotional, misandrist feminism. (The Kitchen and Widows recently peddled the same.)
>They become drug dealers and extortionists to Wall Street businessmen while whining about the 2008 financial crisis. Exploiting themselves to exploit the men who exploit them is tautology that makes sense only to feminist ideologues and Hollywood panderers.
HUSTLERS gets BTFO by /ourguy/
based
/our guy/
>Despite Millennial blather about female agency and economic equality, Hustlers is in a familiar line of post-Madonna Hollywood procurement fantasies.
>In Hustlers, Lopez’s single-minded stripper-pole dance — the film’s highpoint — blurs Ramona’s bad-taste desperation with her own. It’s already been acclaimed as a sure-fire Oscar bid as if to encourage being confined to stereotype.
>Scafaria seems to believe this whoremaster self-empowerment crap, credulous about its New York magazine origin. Her stripper-gangstas are, simply, criminals. Hustlers is appalling. The opposite of slut-shaming, it’s been praised as Goodfellas for women — as if that were an honorable thing.
HOLY FUCKING BASED
>Each woman’s sob story about abuse and resentment brought me back to a 1990 incident: A middle-aged female friend interrupted a group of adolescent girls fawning over Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. She asked them, “What do you think about her being a prostitute?” and the teenager gaggle shot back, “She’s not a prostitute!” Hollywood passed off Roberts’s hooker as Cinderella — or maybe Eliza Doolittle. Naïveté is an easy training ground for the oldest profession.
How is he so right?
How can one man be so based
>it’s been praised as Goodfellas for women — as if that were an honorable thing
kek
What did he mean by this
Fucking savage. Holy shit.
I watched the trailer and it looked like a Melissa McCarthy movie
I would rather read his reviews than any women or jew.
Fake.
No professional critic would write like this. He would be immediately cancelled and there would be no option left but to commit suicide.
I’m curious what his take on joker will be.
He will say it's better than Scorsese
>Exploiting themselves to exploit the men who exploit them is tautology that makes sense only to feminist ideologues
alright this is based
Just a reminder Armond White gave positive reviews for
>Mr. Deeds
>Grown Ups
>Jack and Jill
>Vox Lux
>Dawn of the Dead 2004
>Bandslam
>The Blind Side
>A Serious Man
But he hates
>There Will Be Blood
>The Dark Knight
>Up
>BR2049
>Pulp Fiction
>Fight Club
>Inception (he said its the work of a “con artist”)
>Toy Story 3 & 4
Lets not take this guy seriously lol
His reviews may not be trolling, but this shit, this is some serious fucking trolling. Fuck him for trying to legitimize this.
People always wanna label these twats like provocative or contrarian, to me a performative asshole is still an asshole.
Was never into his bullshit reviews in the first place but, if he still has his job after this, I hope to never see him lauded as a troll genius for his reviews again. People need to forget he exists and not give play to a single word written by him.
Nolan cucks BTFO
He's a gay black man. He's immune.
I'm not sure. It can go either way. He hates The Dark Knight movies, and The King of Comedy but he loves Taxi Driver and Man of Steel. So, he basically likes films with a positive message that appeals to humanity OR a cautionary film.
If Joker is only nihilistic and doesn't serve as a cautionary tale, but instead it glamorizes his bad actions then he will hate it. If they treat it the same way as Travis from Taxi Driver, or Jack from the film "The House that Jack Built" then he will like it.
In other words, give a positive message or give us a cautionary tale where the characters are punished and have consequences for their actions, unlike The Hustlers and The Kitchen
I'll just leave this here
Werner and White dabbing on Hollywood, this is fucking great. I wish I could have been there.
How can one gay nigger be so based
120991531
I haven't seen any of the ones he gave positive reviews for, but that shit list is pretty good.
It's a joke post, it's made up
This is so fucking true. /ourguy/
>that shit list is pretty good.
Do you mean his list is accurate or do you mean the list on the shit part actually contain pretty good movies?
Accurate. BR2049 is pretty looking garbage, Fight Club is subversive propaganda disguised as a movie, Pulp Fiction is juvenile garbage, Inception is just regular garbage, and the Dark Knight is capeshit.
>Inception (he said its the work of a “con artist”)
He is right. Also TDK is trash.
>>Jack and Jill
Good god. I can excuse liking a bad movie but not this one.
Why do you guys hate on Nolan? He comes up with original, complex, and philosophical movies. He's not your typical blockbuster Hollywood guy. He's like the replacement for Kubrick, but sharper
>>A Serious Man
>Bad
Fuck off
Because he makes typical blockbuster movies then dresses them up in the shallow pretense of philosophy.
No one man should be so based holy shit
It's boring af. Literally no plot
>The Dark Knight
>Inception (he said its the work of a “con artist”)
Based, finally someone seeing Nolan for what he is.
Whatever, I'm not gonna get some word salad about how Nolan is shit but Adam Sandler's films are good lol what timeline is this shit baka
femshits btfo
Soul vs Soulless
>defending Sandler and Synder and slamming Nolan and these modern classics
This ain't it chief
Mr. Deeds is kino
>Fuck niggers ahah
>Armon white is /ourguy/
which is it
he's an honorary white, it's on his name even
>There Will Be Blood
>The Dark Knight
>Up
>Pulp Fiction
>Fight Club
>Inception (he said its the work of a “con artist”)
>Toy Story 3 & 4
these are all dogshit and I'm not even trying to be contrarian. I disagree with him on BR2049 though.
>Confusing plot and story
Semantics
W E W
>W H O R E M A S T E R
Defending Sandler makes me question his sanity but hes spot-on about Nolan. They guy's a very definition of soulless film making.
>80% of film will be characters explaining the plot
>characters spouting exposition so every low IQ retard in audience gets it
>robot like dialogue
>no emotions whatsoever
>action heavy
>bad choreography of action scenes
>the whole film will have 4 colours: blue, gray, black and white due to his colour blindness
>bombastic soundtrack that will remind the audience when to be worried
>no visual storytelling whatsoever
>badly edited
>time gimmick
>egregiously stupid
Also
>Nolan
>philosophy
Very funny.
Also this
>plot
Brainlet detected
>hates Meme Knight
>hates Meme Up
>hates Meme BR2049
>hates Meme Fiction
>hates Meme Club
>hates Meme Inception
>hates meme Story 3 & 4
B A S E D
>philosophical movies
What's the philosophy in inception or Memento?
you have to go back
>not Meme Runner 2049
>not Memeception
Come on my dude, if you did it for the rest, do it for those too correctly as well.
>whoremaster
How can one man be so based?
>Glover as Lando targets the nerd chic audience through idiotic Black Lives Matter marketing. Like the actor-rapper's recent (unimaginative) millennial anthem "This is America" which confuses Prince's soul-funk pizazz and racial eccentricity with dull Democratic manipulation and cynical social conformism, Solo is a film that corrupts the radical essence of its heritage. It sets both the Black and the nerd communities back 60 years, it is Obama politricks and Marvel imperialism. Jim Crow meets Flash Gordon, Disney is the new plantation and self-proclaimed nerds are happily picking up the cotton. At least the Lucas prequels had Jar-Jar Binks and flatulence gags, a bona-fide iteration of Black insouciance and freedom in a post-Eddie Murphy world. Comedic truth versus manufactured indignation. Solo epitomizes blockbuster nihilism and banality.
Kubrick's characters had no emotion. Admit it. At least be consistent
Only critic you should listen to
Fucking based
>the whole film will have 4 colours: blue, gray, black and white due to his colour blindness
Ummmm most films are like this, retard. What? Do you want it in green or purple lol
Depends on the film. Barry Lyndon is kind of sad. Also the point it that Kubrick didn't even try to that sometimes, Nolan ties to have an emotional centre every time but he fails.
Why would you want to watch something that isn't interesting lol
>most films are like this, retard. What? Do you want it in green or purple lol
No. He is colour blind and all of his films are like a gray mush.
Armond 'honorary' White
Are you retarded?
Based except switch Jack and Jill with BR2049
Nice bait. Have a you
>hating 2049, Pulp Fiction, Toy Story 3, and There Will Be Blood
But why?
So you wanna watch The Dark Knight with green colors? Lmao
Most films should be blue or white or black. Seeing Spiderman in orange or purple is weird
Are you retarded? You're the one who thinks a film about two guys sitting down doing nothing can be a good movie because plot doesn't matter lol plot is essential
In fact, when you pitch a film or a producer reads your screenplay, you must have a plot
Spiderman has more colours than that. Even his costume is red.
>plot is essential
You obviously haven't seen My Dinner with Andre. Also plot is isn't essential you plot point mental midget.
>In fact, when you pitch a film or a producer reads your screenplay, you must have a plot
No
Reminder Armond White called Refn autistic and an atrocious filmmaker and called Only God Forgives a decadent drag act
"Ryan Gosling plays DiCaprio to Nicolas Winding Refn’s Scorsese–acting out an adolescent idea of manliness in Drive and nowOnly God Forgives. But sulky Gosling lacks DiCaprio’s hammy brio just as Refn lacks Scorsese’s flamboyance, so he mopes and broods; practicing a weak swagger amidst Refn’s brutal, grotesque, nihilistic stagings"
>Reminder Armond White called Refn autistic and an atrocious filmmaker and called Only God Forgives a decadent drag act
He is entirely accurate.
He is unironically the only decent critic left. You gotta love how redditors act like he's some opportunistic internet troll despite the fact that he has been writing reviews since 1984.
>Lopez’s single-minded stripper-pole dance
>the film’s highpoint
You're not cool or unique for disliking popular stuff. Why can't you just let people like stuff. Not everything is political
i love this even if it is fake
read the reviews and find out
Hustlers BTFO x2
>NOOOOOOOOOO WHY CAN'T MOVIE CRITICS DON'T CRITICIZE MY PIECE OF SHIT FLICKS?
I haven't watched any of his recs, but:
>But he hates
>There Will Be Blood
>The Dark Knight
>Up
>BR2049
>Pulp Fiction
>Fight Club
>Inception (he said its the work of a “con artist”)
>Toy Story 3 & 4
are trash
There Will Be Blood is good.
From an adult video game player perspective
Incredibly based
What's bad about it then
It allows itself to be appreciated by juvenile audiences.
It’s because he’s a male who still thinks women who fuck themselves silly is called being exploited. Women like sex too. And there is nothing wrong with being a stripper or a hooker. More women should do it imo.
Any actual criticism?
The most damning thing you can say about any work of art is that plebes enjoy it. If There Will Be Blood was a real film it would be curb stomping all of these gamers with their I drink your milkshake T shirts and Daniel Plainview posters on their bedroom walls.
>I drink your milkshake T shirts and Daniel Plainview posters on their bedroom walls
are those a thing?
So fucking based holy shit thank you Armond
Self described "film buff" gamers are definitely a thing. Lapping up their Nolan and Fincher flicks like a little rat. Slurp slurp slurp slurp slurp
How can one man be so BASED
he cannot be stopped
he cannot be slowed down
get the fuck out of his way
or get ran the fuck over
and is P.T.A. one of those filmmaker that should not be appreciated?
Name your top 10 films of this decade.
>Armond WHITE
He passes.
He skirts the line. Boogie Nights and There Will Be Blood should definitely not be appreciated by anybody serious about film.
The Master and Inherent Vice are borderline
a lazy genderswap retelling of a machismo fuelled male orientated classic is nothing more than a soulless facade
The Master is one of the best films of the decade, plebs are the ones who dislike it since they don't get it.
The Master and Inherent Vice are his best movies because they're the least pleb friendly.
The funny thing is, is that The Master isn't even esoteric. I absolutely love the movie, but it's surprising people don't understand it because it's right in your face.
Dawn of the Dead 2004 is a legit great film
Armond White likes popular stuff too though. He likes Spielberg, for example. You're just cherrypicking reviews and basing your perception of him off of that.