You do realize you won't be able to go to the cinema and ask for "1 ticket for the joker" without laughing when it...

open the door
get on the floor

The trick to not get shot during the movie is to simply go to a cinema with a no singles policy with a couple of friends .

>*teleport behind them*
>"heh.nothing personal kids"
>*completely obliterate them*
This is why you don't mess with a Gamer living in a Society

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you guys dont actually go to the cinema alone, right?

it's not hard to ask a girl out a few days before and go accompanied to your local kinoplex to watch a movie.

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>Be me
>Get insanely rich
>first screening of a movie, whole theatre booked
>Book seats in a swastika formation
>there is now an empty swastika formed by those people
DRR DRR BING DRR DRR BING

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No it would be pretty easy

My sister is the only person i've gone to the movies with more than once, i have no other social interaction. It's a fantastic cover for being an otherwise isolated NEET at least.

basado

>Be black and going alone
>Won't be a problem

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I go with frens

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nice digits, fren

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>give the tickets to the people you hate most
THEY'VE BEEN LAUGHING SINCE I CAN REMEMBER

whoah you have some impressive digits fren

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how could they tell what shape it was from their seats? wouldn't you need a birds eye view?

Thanks frens

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based wholesome apu poster

>tfw going to see the joker at a drive in
>gonna bring in some 'za, some booze and get myself a bag of popcorn
>comfyaf.webm
only place that doesnt follow singles policy, enjoy the yify faggots

>tfw Randstad

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Just buy 2 even if you go alone

Well at least you guys have shit to do.
Those Christian centenarians here flip the fuck out if someone suggests building a place for fun that's open after 6PM.
Cinemas are the only thing we have really.

MOM'S GONNA FREAK

>taking a girl to see the Joker

Its been 15 years since I strangled that teenage hitchhiker. I knew this day was coming.

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Yeah like getting stabbed by Abdul

i only see movies with my parents or grandparents

Why you being the Joker, Robert?

>paying to see a movie

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>taking a girl on a date to see the Joker

KEK

How tf do you ask a girl out when you spend 22hours a day In your bedroom?

Funnily enough the foreigners here are atheists who came here in the sixties.

but I want to watch the movie not explain what I don't know is happening in the movie

everybody walk the dinosaur

The cinema falcons would know.

I'm mute so it's actually quite hard

i'll take 0 tickets to the jester please. :)

>not having a human shield
you have alot to learn about kino freinds

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good thing you can order tickets online these day!

somebody stop me!!!!

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wie komt er mee naar joker in rotterdam
samen staan we sterk incels

Based and redpilled
the sister strat is OP

Based as fuck

>pretend to be autistic or something and not comply
>get hurt
>sue
>probably make more money than Joaquin Phoenix in the lawsuit
american problems require american solutions

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>he thinks they'll take him alive

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>pretend

>drive in theater open in October

Fucking liar

Is your friend pic related?

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I was planning to go with a hooker but now a group of friends have invited me to see it instead

based

Yes it is, when I message girls they usually block me instead of replying or just never read it

I will use the ticket machine. They won't know.

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George Lucas used to do that at his local theater, except he bought 5 tickets, he’s pretty fat though

So dutch people don't like going to the cinema?

Based

I just go to the earliest showing on a weekday. Tickets are half price and the theater is basically empty.

Have you fondled her during a movie? I mean it’s dark so she can’t know it’s you

lmao, do Amerifats really tip even the FBI?

going on the second or third day with the gf, who wants to see it probably more than I do, funnily enough.
we both agreed that there's no way in hell we're going opening night

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Ask them if they want to see the movie with me.

Taking a girl to see Joker is like taking a girl to see Annihilation
I'm not making that same mistake twice

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It's okay Jack.

Wasn't Annihilation a chick flick? It had a romance subplot so girls would like it, right?

They have kiosks now dumbass

>make memes about going to the cinema to watch The Joker™
>will actually only watch it when it comes out on the piratebay
ONCE UPON A TIME I WAS FALLING IN LOVE BUT NOW I'M JUST FALLING APART

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It's just not the type of movie you'd take a girl you're meeting for the first time to see.

Watching films is not a social activity.

This user gets it

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I'll be going to see the Joker alone
AMA

But you can’t reserve seats in a movie theater

I haven’t bought a ticket from a physical human being since the 90s.

>tfw no sister to use as cover

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I saw Wind River with a girl the first time I met her. She started crying during the rape scene and that was when I realized I may have dodged some massive bullets.

Nobody actually goes to movies alone.

checked fren

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>His theatre doesn't have reserved seating

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do mutts really get tickets AT the cinema?
LMAO
I just order tickets online and have the PDF on my phone
they scan it as I enter the kinoplex

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>order a single ticket for joker online
>SWAT and FBI are deployed to your house immediately

nice try glowie

no, it costs money

i haven't talked to a woman in 3 years

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Lads does anyone want to go to see joker with me on opening night my city has just enforced a city-wide NSP for that week
i live in London so I will provide a complimentary stab vest

>(((greenblatt)))

>yfw you memed up a shooter to actually shoot up a theatre you're in

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Are you in the French Foreign Legion by any chance?

>nametag says Robert
>isn't Robert
what did he mean by this?

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>with a couple of friends
Normie detected.

Absolutely based.

Based

Not even your own mother?

What about face masks for acid attacks?

kek

>2016
>valentine's day
>tell my wife about Deadpool and that we should go see this new superhero movie
>she actually agrees to see Deadpool
>movie opens with him cutting people to bits
>voiceover saying "your boyfriend told you this would be a superhero movie but he just cut that guy's fucking head off"
>mfw
I know 4channel considers Deadpool to be "reddit" now, but this was a comfy moment

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do you want to wear the wrath shirt or the natural selection one?

>Villain is too scary and real for the female audience.
rottentomatoes.com/m/joker_2019/reviews?sort=rotten
Count the women.

>Wind River
that movie was so forgettable lol
the wife wanted to watch it and didn't flinch at any scene

what makes you think this is possible?

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Sounds lonely

Please oh please say you’re baiting I can’t believe someone would actually make this post

Monk Going Their Own Way

you probably weren't here when the RR homemade teaser was released

>go to the review page of Joker on RT
>half the reviewers are jewish, all give negative responses
>top review mentions the nazis (oh gawd)
Hmm really makes me think

There’s a 4/10 fat black girl that I get tutored with, she was interested in seeing this movie. Should I ask her if she wants to see it with me anons?

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based as fuck!!!!!!!

>4/10
>fat
>black girl
i wouldnt

>no gf
>no friends
guess i'll skip this one h-heh

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It’s that or see with my parents. I honestly don’t want to date black women but if it happens it happens, we all got to start somewhere.

I would do it for the rest of my life until someone catches on

id just watch a camrip of it 2bh, less chance of getting shot.

Hello me

>buys 3 tickets so he can sit alone with no one next to him
What theater do you go to that has a seat per ticket rule? Every theater I've been to is an out right free for all and if you don't want anyone next to you you just tell them to screw off

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Do you seriously not have reserved seating yet?
It's pretty widespread, even shitholes like Arkansas have it
t.Arkansan

Same but with my cute brother.

Not gonna lie.. based.

enjoy getting laughed at

One ticket to Last Christmas, thanks

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Who doesn't buy a ticket online these days?

It was a coastal retard thing but its been spreading even though nobody follows it here because the theaters are empty.

I'm going to see once upon a time in hollywood in a couple of hours. I've been goign to the kino alone for years now.

>it's not hard to ask a girl out a few days before and go accompanied to your local kinoplex to watch a movie.
why would you go with a gf if you want to Focus on a movie?
how could you focus on a movie while you fondle her tits or even harder to do if she sucks you off
taking a gf to a cinema is making 100% sure you will not watch that film

Just go to 10 AM Monday morning shows. Nobody is there and you can get the best seat and just stretch out.
I've thought about how easy it would be to just bring a camera and camcorder and record anything I wanted

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>only 3 years
lmao fag. I bet you hang out with your friends more that once a year

>taking a woman to see a movie she could never feasibly begin to understand, let alone appreciate

Do you have to use sign language? Or do you just type everything into a phone and play the audio?

Theaters are general admission. Buying three seats is no guarantee someone won't sit next to you

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There's plenty of cinemas out there with allocated seating

You’re retarded, what do you think the point of this board is?

Anyone notice the dual meaning of "1 ticket for the joker"? Think about it... Are you going to see the movie, or are you the joker?

More like absolute terror.

don't have any friends. never went to a party. never been in a club. never went out anywhere by myself. never went on any school trip.

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Using the theater as a date always seemed strange. Unless you both really want to see the same film, being in a big dark room with other people where you aren't allowed to talk, focused on something else seems like a terrible way to get to know someone

tfw got a gf that will want to see Joker with me

Using non English outside of /int/ is against the rules

Reminder if you are handsome you can do whatever the fuck you want.

Holy fuck you have to go back
Mother of God can you mods stop jerking to traps and ban this queer

That's why you don't do it for a first date but it's doable for later dates

>buy ticket for joker
>become the joker
>become fully immersed in the film
This is why it got an 8 minute standing applause. #wearethejoker

In the civilized world, we buy our tickets online and reserve our specific seats

>going to the poor people theater that doesn't have assigned seating that you purchase online

I have only gone to the cinema alone once, and it was probably my best moviegoing experience.
Compare that to countless times aquaintances ask stupid shit, say worthless comments or outright spoil the movie while it is playing and I think I prefer going alone.
Watching movies is only social if you watch garbage at home that no one really cares about.

i dont need to talk to anyone when i go to the cinema, i just pre-order my ticket online and pick it up from the machine.

>we all got to start somewhere
if that's where you start, that's where you'll end

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I legitimately haven't seen a theater do that since 2014, and that was a REALLY shitty low end theater
first time I saw reserved seating in a movie theater was probably 2003

The south is less populated, has a mostly elderly population and they only go in the evenings on discount days.
Their tastes are also shit. Some films even get a single showing.

>it's bad to have liked deadpool before reddit soid out over it
cringe

Nice word order in that sentence, a real hoot to read. Fuck Americans. Who even orders tickets at the counter, you order online

kek

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MODS

People wouldn't respect it, empty seats would only prompt ppl to sit where they want. You'd have to confront them all personally to leave your seat in which you don't sit.
Fuck the movie I'd actually pay just to see user to make them one by one.

>pirating a movie with shit 144p quality

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I don't "ask" for tickets, grampa. They have things called "computers" now.
Sorry Robert

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>he imagines how he saves her from the shooter during the movie
AHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

ya but who is gonna post the leak

DELETE THIS

But I'm ugly, not handsome

Wtf, even in memexico you can reserve your seats online

>1488
"I knew you were a Nazi! Single tickets not honored here Fuhrer!"

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pls come back, hiro can't control his mods for shit

Where do you live, user. Tell us.

Doesn't this just mean you're commiting suicide?

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So is the controversy fabricated for publicity or are a lot of people genuinely mad about the incel themes?

I'm not going to see it until the waves of mass shootings finally pass

>Shoots empty chairs.
>Goes home.
>So lonely.

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>not doing it the steve jobs way and buying out all of the seats in nearby theaters so no one can listen to your movie through the wall

I bring my service animal with me and they are legally required to let me in

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kek

not if he bought it up so he could bring all his best friends

Based.

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some people do last movie i saw someone asked me if I could trade seats with them and I told them to just take the empty seats a few over and they fucked off

>As Hannah Arendt saw banality in the supposed evil of the Nazi Adolf Eichmann, I see in Joker an attempt to elevate nerdy revenge to the plane of myth. That's scary on a lot of different levels.
>David Edelstein
Makes me think

>taking girls out on dates
yeah okay, grandpa

I hope you all realize how shit the fucking ending is, it’s pure cringe, sounds like it was written by a kid

Why do you have a service animal? Are you blind? Did he type your reply?

>people laughing for joker tickets
unironically 200 IQ marketing

Fuck me in my thigh highs and sailor moon outfit

he lies down when my blood sugar is getting to high so I know to take my insulin. it's really important for the movies because I'm expected to be eating at the movie

my old neighbor has a service dog for vertigo
literally just because she sometimes gets dizzy

>the supposed evil

/ourguy/?

go keto
then you won't need insulin because you won't have any blood sugar

This is what I do too. It's awesome

is there a camrip yet of the complete film

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same but i hardly use her cause movies are usually my " i'm going out with friends today"thing

Its br br deng you fucking imbecile

reddit reddit reddit

I'll ask for two tickets, if they ask me who's coming with me.
I'll tell them "Say hello to my little friend"

I find it funny you people scream reddit when I guarantee you all have accounts there. I have only ever used it for nfl streams, and don't need an account for that.

bad post

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Based, but who is that little friend?

this movie is not for you.

thanks cunt

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his falcon

>Hasn't heard about based YIFY™

>Still getting your ticket from a cashier

Don't your cinemas have machine ticket stands?

>not wanting to interact with your local black Robert that works at the kinoplex

>went to see once upon a time in hollywood myself
>person next to me was confused that i came alone

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this
I have only ever purchased a ticket online for the IMAX at Jordan's Furniture

Keked and checked

(you didn't get dubs by the way)

SAY HELLO TO MY CHOCOLATE BLEND

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HUMINA HUMINA

not rich but i did the same once
the movie was disappointing tho

What if I go to the cinema with a group of friends and we all buy our own tickets individually? That's what I usually do.

>One ticket for Joker user?... Ha ha, yeah... Hey, you remember I always had your back, right?

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I go on the weekday
In the middle of the day
All alone

>tell them they brought the wrong guns
>scream fire

what point during the movie do i know to duck down below the hail of gunfire
which phrase are the incel jokers waiting to hear before they make society pay

The Robert De Niro scene

Yeah when Joker yells "YOU GET WHAT YOU FUCKING DESERVE"
Duck and play dead, you should buy hotdogs with a lot of ketchup so you smear it across your seat and yourself.
Don't worry about the mess, the wagie will clean it up afterwards.

>I remember those times you made fun of me for only buying one ticket
>Don't worry, I remember that very well
>Haha

I hardly go to the cinema at all. Last movie I watched was Godzilla. Watched it with my dad since he got me into that stuff. Him being an old boomer didn't like the loud noises and Ithink he had a crush on Vera.

Don't you guys buy the ticket online and have it scanned when entering?

how will the empoyees not see you dragging around a camera?

I'd never invite a girl to watch that though. I'd invite her to watch something pseudo-intellectual, like Ad Astra

or the rise of skywalker

maar ik ben eenzaam

Human interaction is wildly overrated.

>be NEET shutin thats lost contact with most of my friends 4 years ago
>1 friend comes by once a year we see a movie at the cinema or something john wick 3 this time
>1 guy sitting alone in couple of rows front of us, he actually pulls up Yea Forums at one point, my buddy starts making fun of him
>tfw pushback and say there's nothing wrong with going to the movies alone

I am with you in spirit alonebro, keep on.

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What is with you retards and needing someone to accompany you to the cinema? So she can talk while you're trying to watch the movie? Or bother you in some other ways? Am I the only one that finds company when trying to watch a movie annoying?

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I'd openly mock anybody looking at Yea Forums in public
not at a joker screening though

i browsed Yea Forums today while waiting in the taco bell drive-thru. i don't have friends who i enjoy the company of besides the ones from college and they still in their last year.

read the op

How did it feel user

Literally no idea why people are giving you shit for this post. I hope you had a great time with your wife, user.

who cares? Are you so insecure that you can’t go see a movie by yourself?

so deadpool was referring to your wife’s boyfriend

Let's go, wie woont in de buurt van Pathe Haarlem?

You really never know, people got killed during the plane scene for fucks sake. Best bet is to rent a prostitute and go to a couples only screening.

Why wouldn't they be open in October?

BTW, RIP to my local drive in that finally shut down last month.

>One for Joker, please
I just can't bring myself to say this. I'm going to have to wait for a rip, bros.

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>movie theater employee in costume of a current release
actually kind of neat

>go to the local cinema to see JOKER
>go through the metal detector
>as I'm going through I forget I have my cross on
>*beep beep beep*
>oh fuck.jpg
>"A cross? You wouldn't happen to be a virgin would you?"
>"n-no"
>the ticket man scans my barcode to check my sex.com profile
>"Sir these are all solo videos. I cannot permit you to see JOKER (2019) a Todd Phillips film."
>I tell him "What do you get when you cross a mentally ill man who wants to see JOKER? You get what you fu-"
>before I finish my sentence I'm escorted out by security while giving the creepiest laugh

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JESUS FUCKING CHRIST
ROBERT LOOK OUT FOR THAT BANANA

wasnt there a guy that did that during the launch of a random disney movie
he bought the entire line and a mother wanted to sit there with her children

some one knows what im talking about?

im too fat to be killed with mere bullets

Fucking beautiful.

>You do realize you won't be able to go to the cinema and ask for "1 ticket for the joker" without getting fucking shot when it comes out.

>Not mocking phoneposters

The crazies are all using rifles these days. Your date wouldn't stop the bullet if you held her in front of you, and the shooter would just get two kills with one shot.

>Not asking the cashier to see the movie with you

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Movie is a terrible idea for a first date, let alone a movie like Joker

>I want to get to know each other
>Same, let's sit in the dark for a few hours and watch a loser clown go on a violent rampage

DEJA VU

>not buying the middle row and back then not going
>but turning up half way in to ask the attendant to remove anyone sitting in those empty seats you own

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>Oh no, JUUZ!
inb4 so faggot retard calls me a jew

redpilled as fuck

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Whatever nigger

What's so wrong with going to the movie theaters by yourself?
I haven't been here long, but I've always gone by myself for a long time and I've never felt weirded out about it.

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why not simply caress her thigh as the movie plays, and see what happens?

for me its 7

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>that cup

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nice cunny in the background

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Who is this guy for real? Is his name actually Robert?

Yes his name is Robert

How the fuck does your dog know when your sugar is too high?

What if someone arrives when the movie is about to start, realize the seat will remain empty and just sits next to him?

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they can smell it, they're trained to know when

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I’m going to see the Les Jester alone while wearing my WEDDING RING.

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I'm not gonna see it in the cinema. I have a littler tradition that for any batman/joker movie I torrent the first shitty cam rip that becomes available and watch that instead until it comes out on blu ray.

Why would I want an annoying human near me blabbering when I want to enjoy cinemaplex experience all by myself?