What the fuck is the deal with these modern comedians who all seem to be part of a sort of posse but have no notable...

uh he killed his wife, that's a notable work.

You shouldn't be trying to post after taking the pills, Pat.

They’re in a literal cult that fucks children, user. It’s a requirement for success in Hollywood.

he's a little weasel guy like littlefinger. he weasels his way up the ladder.

Good to see you worthless shut ins recognize yourselves. Now go be useless for the next 50 years.

Patton, put down the pills. It's just Yea Forums. Another woman doesn't need to die.

Behave patton

Attached: image.jpg (700x461, 117K)

You're the one losing it in a thread about a shitty comedian, user.

am I the only person on Yea Forums who doesn't hate Patton Oswalt? I like his old appearances on O&A

Patton Oswalt has a ton of material in his early career ranging from angsty edgy to actually funny. He burnt out when he got married and had a kid like literally every comedian ever. His mid 2000s specials are very good if you are actually interested

I haven't liked him since he did that rat movie where he tries to pretend he's a chef

I don't give a fuck about any of you. I'm doing laundry tonight and you people are talking like assholes. So.. it's all fun for me while I wait on the drying cycle. You all sound like you're max 17 years old and don't know a goddamn thing. So pissing on you is a joy.

>pissing on 17 year olds is a joy
what did he mean by this?

Attached: image.jpg (480x354, 16K)

Patton please, just admit you killed her.

quit larping

Sorry, telling the truth to children. That's what I meant. You're all fucking kids that didn't grow up with Carlin or Cheech and Chong, all the before the greats greats. You're just superficial worthless human bobble heads.

They're standup comedians. It's a weird job and they tend to stick together.
There aren't that many traveling comedians, so its a small circle.
If you are a bigger name comedian, you usually have someone else open for you so you can help them get some exposure.

You should try breaking the pills in half and spacing the doses out

Attached: image.jpg (636x382, 45K)

Calm down Pat.

Carlin single handedly killed comedy, you genx weirdo.

Dave's not here man

You just stick with that plan, don't you kid? Pills. I respect a simpleton that has found his place in life. If you think that's healthy then keep on keeping on bro. Until you shoot up a school you're good with me.

Why didn't you avoid pills while your wife was dying from them?

Dave? No man, I"M Dave. Open the door man I got the stuff.

I didn't like him in Best of the Worst.

How exactly did she die? I just remember a lot of people joking about it

literally only patton would think carlin or cheech and chong were the "greats"

>he killed his wife AND shitposts on Yea Forums

Attached: 1567517594922.jpg (400x400, 22K)

occasionally be on things, do standup tours sometimes

its not that hard

>doesn't deny doing pills
>rambles about school shooters
talk to your "Doctor" about tapering your dose, and seek counseling

Nah he was always terrible, I'm glad now people have stopped pretending his "i'm le epic nerd xD" schtick was funny

I honestly love your obsession with me, it means I've really fucked with you on a primal level. Keep spilling your kiddie secrets. I'm learning all about you in your publicfreakout.

Loved you in Big Fan

How do you figure? It takes no special effort to occasionally refresh and post in this thread.

In truth, he doesn't matter to me. I just hated people shitting on him for no reason. I think his best part was in Veep when he fondled Jonad's balls. Simple and funny and I watched one of his standups which was .. fine. But you fucking weirdos love to freak out so I love playing with that. You angry basement people are so fucking easy to manipulate.

What the hell are you talking about schizoid? lol

sorry i'm not a fan of murderers

Attached: image.gif (200x240, 1.2M)

Cheech and Chong were kino

Mom's gonna freak

ODed on fentanyl while having a bunch of other pills in her system

pretty sizable, just like his dead wife he killed

remember blind melon chitlin? christ. Or when the guy went to court for exposing himself. "Baliff, Wack his PeePee."

youtube.com/watch?v=mAw-3ERSIIY

def patton. just as unfunny and desperate as your twitter.

>Patton ITT getting angry at people accusing him of murder
Should someone call the police? His new wife might be in legitimate danger.

You're autistic, right? No one hugs a stupid thread like this unless they 'aren't right'.

His standup is really good.

seek help lol

Because it's a conspiracy theory propagated by magalards because he constantly speaks out against their daddy. Those yokels will literally believe anything.

keep typing lol

please do. vocaroo it.

>thinks he's been replying to a single poster
this is a comfy thread

so like, exactly how a depressed person who was self-medicating might commit suicide?

patton the grownups are talking. go to bed.

Fuck off Patton

>bu-buh buh muh circlejerk muh daddy
Fucking faggots, go suck each other off.

that's what you want us to think

You simples are like putting foil in front of a cat. You just keep at it like idiot cats do. I honestly want to see how far you cripple minded assholes will go. You're toys to normal people. I guess that's how Jeffrey Epstein got his kids.

it used to be yeah

wealthy comfortable people rarely stay funny

Patton, you need to relax. Those pills are making you crazy.

Since when does the left openly protect the bourgeoisie?

Sorry, not like any of you podunk idiots would know who Jeffrey Epstein was.

u mad

lay off the pills

I now want these pills you're talking about. Give ME PILLS.

>sleep until you don’t wake up

I'm bored between the spin cycle and drying my clothes. You pieces of shit are just entertainment until then.

just buy mexican coke, it's like 80% fentanyl by this point

Just dig around in your wife's cabinet.

seething

On the eve of her book coming out revealing who the golden state killer was....

Yeah, sure. She just happened to be 'depressed' right before the biggest moment of her career. Oh, and for 15 hours she lay dead in bed, Patton was home.... the entire time.

You know you can actually do normal stuff when the laundry is going right? You dont have to sit there and look at it

hold up, is this to suggest that patton may be the golden state killer?

he is.

Post proof asking for a friend

he destroyed it. it's buried with his wife.

wondering how a standup comedian squeezed his way into being slightly noteworthy through specials and internet shit? probably a fuckload of hard work

but if she was about to publish the novel revealing that he was the killer then wouldn't she already know?

guys please stop pissing patton off you're putting his new wife in danger

((hard work))

>hard work
he was an affirmative action hire, Hollywood needs at least one contract player goblin

I'm watching Longmire while chatting with you representations of human garbage. Is that normal enough? I'm on e06s08.

that's why he had to golden state kill her

why are you so angry Pat?

Since when do the inbred flyover trumpanzees represent the right?

>add riddled zoomer can't watch a show without using his phone constantly
Typical

not angry, just disgusted by most of you people. You all sound like filth to me. Can I be calm in my disgust?

I guarantee I'm older than your father. Kid.

>not angry
>just about to black out from too many pills

>REEE STOP CALLING ME A MURDERER REEEEE
>lol why are so mad
>wtf im not mad REEEE
i knew you were unfunny but jeez, I din't realize you were schizo too.

sad stuff

I need these fucking pills you're obsessed with. I'll take them if you just send them to me.

Patton can't risk anyone seeing the clothes he's washing in case someone describes the suspect in another murder or he'll have to kill that person too.

and you sound like it, the grave can't come soon enough. take your meds old timer.

Since the left started denouncing the people they should protect.
I don't really share you obession with your dumb president, but why do you want to protect the rich and shit on the poor?

>I need these fucking pills
control yourself

Read this board for 5 minutes, there was a mangled vagina, an anus and morons in every thread. Whats sad about this? This entire place is full of people that belong in a wood chipper. Am I wrong?

Maybe you shouldn't have gave them all to your wife?

Patton SEETHING.

why do you let Brad Bird bully you?

Attached: image.jpg (504x378, 53K)

Sounds like arrested development is a fitting show for you

>since the left
So the right is a reactionary movement based on what the left does? Why are are you such a docile numbskull movement? Is it all the inbreeding?

I love angry kids that search for something to attack. You're such an emotional cripple. Go find someone who likes you. They don't need to love you, but find a friend.

he's a pedo (all these 'wow how did this guy end up being so famous) cases are, they form cabals and boost each other's careers, they're littered through hollywood
his wife found out and he murdered her

*given
How did you hillbillies even find this board?

Why do you let brad bird bully you?

Being here, absolutely. I wish i was arrested in my emotional developement. I'd be Trump or some other fuck. I'm just generically depressed, but I know more than you kids do.

I liked you in Reno 911. That was your peak Patton.

Havent seen gore in years on Yea Forums.
Maybe you shouldnt search out disgusting stuff grandpa. Or maybe you remembered your wife's mangled vagina in a senile fit

the sad part is you willingly exposing yourself to things you know aren't good for your mental health, and trying to grasp some sense of hypocritical self righteousness from it.

Attached: giphy.gif (350x308, 1.32M)

I dont think you know how politics work. Its not that the right started helping the poor, but the left has betrayed their voters so much, that the people now trust the wolf over the shepherd

Patton, please, admit your crime and face the consequences. Haven't you hurt enough people? I'm given you one last chance

I can see the headlines now:
"Mysterious Hacker Yea Forums Kills Patton Oswalt's New Wife: Overdose Suspected"

Your doing this to yourself. You are reacting and earning yourself reactions. You're being pretty funny today Patton.

you think watching kids flail is upsetting? You poor thing. Watching this is like watching a house fire. my self righteousness should self evident to you pieces of shit. grow the fuck up.

first time he's ever been funny

>my self righteousness should self evident
what did he mean by this?

is this even english

keep pretending, fuck up. You probably posted 8 posts like an asshole. Who does that?>

>my self righteousness should self evident
:^)

Haven't you posted like 40 times in this thread Pat?

Who doesn't drop articles. Look it up, moron.

That was my first post in this thread. Keep lashing out man.

What do I look up?

Lotta clothes. It's a long weekend and you pieces of shit are soooo useable.

You're becoming more and more incoherent. Lay down Patty.

Yeah, I guess you can't just leave them, wouldn't want someone to find a machine full of blood.

You gimps are awesome. I need to sleep but you fucking idiots just keep going. I need someone to tag me out.

>sleeping before you finish your laundry
It's like you like mildew or something

>Im actually trolling you guise haha.
You are obviously genuinely upset. Just close the thread.

>i need to guard my laundry that's why i'm still responding i'm not mad at all
>wtf stop laughing at me it's bed time i'll leave my laundry
hmmmmmm

On the off chance that you aren't actually larping. Might I ask how an old man like you decided to visit Yea Forums, of all boards, to post weirdly out of touch stuff?

kek. he's seething

kek

use one fewer fentanyl patch next time

So upset now. I'm watching the twin towers with rifftrax. God I'm so unhappy and fretting. You don't really understand Yea Forums at all, do you?

Calm down buddy. Are you okay?

KEK

what's Yea Forums this is a board on 4channel

>REEEEE STOP MOCKING ME
>REEEEE IM JUST TROLLING HAHA IM NOT MAD THAT'S WHY I KEEP RESOINDING
>REEEE I GOT YOU ALL TROLLED IM GOING TO SLEEP WTF STOP NOCKING ME IM GONNA KEEP RESPONDING REEEE
>IM NOT MAD IM BEING PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE REEEE
fentanyl is a hell of a drug

How thirsty are you?

>Stuck to this thread.
>Constantly watching and replying to posts.
Im looking out for you man. They just want your reactions and you keep giving it to them. I'm sorry about your wife, i'm sure it wasn't your fault.

Not as much as you are, I'm sure.

Attached: Screenshot_20190903-202716_Chrome.jpg (1080x2220, 342K)

Do innocent men really sit around defending themselves on anonymous chinese cartoon forums? something protest to much something something.

thirsty.

well get some water than patton. all your salt is probably drying you out. not to mention the pills.

Carlin is why we have Nanette

thirsty. So thirsty you need those pills.

No, I'm not your wife. Are you delirious?

retard alert

Keep going gimp, I only have another 15 minutes in me. So you can sound like an asshole all on your own. What afucking piece of shit you are.

Get help

>something protest to much
Could you repeat that in English?

you seem guilty because you're being defensive.

>local boomer screams at internet

I don't watch anything he's in. I don't think he's funny and I know he murdered his wife. He's also ugly but I don't hold that against him.

please keep going.

>guys I'm busy
>no wait guys im gonna stay teehee
mannerisms of a femboi

Quick, scroll down before he goes to sleep. You can say it to his face :^)

mannerisms of a murderer

how so my diminutive friend? If everyone who criticized you was a murderer, the world must have millions.

His 2000s specials are just "dude weed" and "lol christians are dumb" like Carlin but unoriginal.

he looks like he has downsyndrome....
maybe if he does considering his material

heh

not everyone who shittalks me is a murderer. patton happens to be trying to, and also happens to be a murderer.

Gather your thoughts before posting next time, it'll help with clarity

you killed your wife. admit it. you'll feel better.

Wrong poster

Because it's honestly fucking disgusting for a bunch of random faggots on the internet to start rumors that the dude killed his wife with no evidence at all. Its not fuckin bantz, and when you're an old ass boomer like me you'll think "damn that was actually kind of gross"

To be fair Adam Sandler movies aren't great, but they're enjoyable. They're family friendly for the most part and while they aren't clever they are funny.

What are some modern movies similar to what Adam Sandler and the boys made?

>kill wife
>get angry when people point out you killed your wife

Why do you care so much? Real question. You're spazzing out at people you consider beneath you and worthless for hours because they made a joke about some unfunny comedian

He destroyed a book that was at the publishers? This doesn't add up

yeah I smell a rat

Attached: image.jpg (2000x3000, 675K)

I love that you think you're talking to one person. You're so obsessed and fucked up. Ask the asshole you're talking to if he's me. You're so stupid.

don't forget Ratatouille

well its the kind of thing that starts spreading around when you kill your wife.

Here's a group of words you need to get familiar with. A generic dumb cunt. If you don't progress the point you're all this is all you'll be a simple dumb fuck up. Grow MORE.

He's just following your lead from earlier in the thread, you know, when you were arguing with 20 different anons like they were one guy.

I know a school yard full of kids, dumbass. You really don't understand much of this, do you?

comics like Patton Oswalt do stand up at casinos for money

What an odd thing to say

i thought this kid was voiced by patton oswalt for years

Attached: latest[1].png (280x419, 73K)

That's very convenient.

Kek. Youve been doing the same thing.

It was fun in Veronica Mars when they just made fun of him for being a degenerate creep the whole season

>mangled vagina
yeah... "vagina"

and then an actual murderer

Patton, just give up. Try another day. It's hard to post on pills.
he mad
kek

see? children.

severely underrated

Attached: 1562756001748.jpg (720x1127, 52K)

Attached: 1565131450613.jpg (2048x1591, 430K)

.Patton Oswalt
>No notable work

Attached: 1242911076001_5132161181001_et-patton-speach-091916hulu.jpg (1280x720, 490K)

anyway, patton if you are in this thread I just wanna say I really like all your podcast appearances

BASED

album cover material right here

thank you, i appreciate that

You're so sad and lonely I can tell

I'm voting for Trump again in 2020

Pat, it's over, your done

""""axewound""""

Don't forget to find the jews dancing in the streets. they're hard to find but they're there

you like that dick in your boomerpucci don't you?

Rob Schneider was on SNL,
which pretty much gets a potential career for any former cast member from the show.
Also, the Deuce Bigelow films were funny at least in parts.
I just wonder why Schneider hasn’t tried serious roles.
He would probably be perfect playing side characters in some films.

Oswalt Patton, go die like general Patton

I mean I fort knew him as the friend in King of Queens and then ratatouille. Then I heard his stand up a few years later.

Some guys like Oswalt seemed to just get popular for being able to play a particular character in TV shows and movies that people wanted. He also has a very distinct voice that casting directors probably really like for some roles.

He's sorta mediocre as a comedian on his own now, but was fairly entertaining in the past primarily because he'd talk about shit based on his own life, which is now a really boring life since he moved out to Hollywood to be rich.

Worse cases I think are like with Sarah Silverman who could legit be pretty funny like with her old Comedy Central show, then now renounce the jokes they did as bigoted.

>from the 70s
Get the FUCK out of here zoomoid shit or I will come over and fucking assfuck your millennial mom

What a great show.

>no evidence
>literally the last person to see his wife alive, and then sat around his house for the more than 15 hours she was dead without caring or alerting anybody
>for reasons unknown, she just 'happened' to have fyntenal, xanax, and various other drugs in her body, drugs that usually only circulate among drug addicts of the Hollywood scene

because he is a conservative in Hollywood. he talked about when Adam brought him in during Adam's visit to Howard Stern,

Ooooh, I get it. Are you one of those teenagers that read a bunch of western Yea Forumsmics and horror stories, then grossly overestimated your ability to do psychological damage to people? You do realize that nothing you've said in this thread so far is going to make any of us remember you the second the thread 404s, right?

keep your day job, patton. Which is nothing.

This is the information I was looking for. Nobody ever says that though it's always just
>muh patton oswalt killed his wife

laundry is for women

Patton Oswald is like the unfunny version of Drew Carey and more pathetic. With that fat body, his weird obsession with his kid, the wife he murdered because she was gonna be more famous than him, the fact that he ran out and married some dried up roastie like 3 months after he was cleared of the murder of his wife is bizarre. But if you had to suck Kevin James' smelly dick you'd be angry too I guess.

nobody did

The irony is they're literally acting like Oswalt's character in Veronica Mars.

patton seething and sounding like a predictable wine swirling catty faqqot as usual

Attached: 1565569793424.png (558x744, 321K)

>indisputably enabled wife's opiate addiction
>"start rumors"

lol

>no notable work
Well he was on a successful sitcom for 10 years, he starred in a very successful Pixar movie, he’s done tons of voice work and had a number of successful standup specials. So yeah, I think you’re just kind of dumb

>thinks anyone cares about the rat movie

Attached: LaFou.jpg (1480x832, 126K)

FOUL MURDER

Attached: FA279316-3048-4D16-8E47-069DC4DB8C18.png (2732x2048, 2.98M)

Laundry is an errand usually performed by the wife
But i guess you dont know about that

>16th most successful Pixar film

Attached: ABC Witch Hunt.jpg (600x269, 28K)

>Since when does the left openly protect the bourgeoisie?
Marx.

checked

you got to admit that was a pretty impressive drug cocktail. I wonder what Patton is on he seems so angry and Ill tempered. I'd be interested if he actually told the truth about what was happening. Obviously they were about to get divorced as he married another woman shortly afterwards.

Even if they do fuck all, they are still more beneficial than Patton, who brings negative value to society.

Absolutely based

Attached: cbale.gif (442x259, 419K)

>shitting on him for no reason
He is talentless unfunny nepotist cocksucker. How is that not a reason?

Since early 20th century.

Patton can be blamed for the rise in "nerds are cool" culture. He used to do whole routines on wookies.

That and the fact that he killed his wife makes him not a great guy.

He seems like he'd be a complete dick to people who aren't in his special group.

i think you know

Attached: filthy grabber rubbing hands together.png (461x583, 2K)

It would be great if he didn't even like SW and just inserted all those references after 5 minutes of googling. Patton spends his weekends watching NFL and MLB divisional races. Couldn't tell you the difference between a wookie and an ewok.

>right started helping the poor,
They do. The right wing Christian charities are biggest and most generous in the world. Leftists just like to say they care, but if the words were food, there would be no famines in leftist shitholes.

Patton has been doing comedy longer than you have been alive kiddo.

But how long has he been murdering people?

Based

Attached: 1489083665923.jpg (960x960, 73K)

I don't know how or why the information was released but it's easily researchable now. Patton actually gave two different testimonies to detectives and changed his story, first from denying he had any knowledge of his wife using drugs and saying that she was a 'heavy' sleeper or was exhausted that day for some reason, then later he said he was aware she took drugs, but only sleeping pills because she was anxious for some reason. When asked why he didn't think anything was odd about her not moving out of bed for 15 hours while Patton and his son was home, he claimed he just thought she needed some 'extra' sleep. On the 15th hour or so of her not moving is when he finally dialed 911.

Less than a year later he was engaged to a woman he had been seeing since before his wife's death.

Funny may be subjective, but Schneider's at least likable.
>it's not like he killed his wife or something.

see?
Schneider'd never write shit like that.

>Why do you care so much?
No, that's not a real question. That's a deflection. You're afraid that you might have to sympathize with someone you don't want to sympathize with, so you argue in favor of apathy and nihilism as a defense mechanism.

Damn is patton really itt. He legit has an ambien addiction and he abuses that shit

What if you kill your washing machine?

Shut up, you fat fuck. The Sandler Squad has far more worldwide recognition.

given the assumption of anonymity I honestly wouldn't be surprised if a lot of industry insiders browse Yea Forums to be able to discuss this stuff without having to take into account potential damage to their reputation.

Murderer. It's never going to stop until you admit it Patton. Why did she have opioids, Patton?

>(((award shows)))
my man...