In case of an active shooter situation, don't panic, don't walk over eachother. Just calmly run to the exit door...

In case of an active shooter situation, don't panic, don't walk over eachother. Just calmly run to the exit door, don't look back, don't try to take your stuff with you. And most importnatly, enjoy your movie

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>spot light hovers on you
>please congratulate user! this is his 100th visit and he is still a virgin!

>watch out for this user, if there's a shooter today, that will be him

i'm always the designated hospital driver

>we are proud to offer a cinema experience that includes no single ticket attendees and no unattended males.
>Enjoy the show!

just hide in the manlet pit. the designated shooter never goes there.

ROBERT NO! I TRUSTED YOU

ever since someone broke the periscope the shorter ones have gone feral in my local plex, wouldn't dare even stick my hand over the edge

No singles policy don't make sense, the shooter can simply pay a prostitute to accompany him to the place he wants to shoot.

The no singles policy clearly has a no THOT/whore policy, that's why only married Chads get in.

Robert? I'm afraid he doesn't work here anymore... I'm Emma! What can I get you, user?

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All jokes aside, I find the pre-movie warning at most AMC's to be a bit distracting.
it's something along the lines of
>in the event of an emergency, exit the building immediately and remain far away
and then a coke ad plays after

>Implying a shooter has the social skills to pay for a prostitute

>importnatly,

Dude I can't afford a gun and a prostitute it's one or the other.

H-he got me, sir... d-did the orphans make it out alright?

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They're all pretty disturbing, they try to make them cute and light hearted.

One got shot in the face but it was only a Jew.

shh, robert, you are going to miss the best part

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You were a good one Robert.. Maybe even the best..

I'll put popcorn and a coke on your grave

Can you get me Robert back please ;_;

can i fuck you behind the dumpster

>Your complimentary gun sir

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Wait are these real? I haven’t been to a movie in years

It was a joke but someone pointed that AMC has something along those lines. I'm not american, I guess it's cultural.

>stand up
>take a gracious bow
>hope that owning it would salvage the moment
>people start throwing popcorn and beverages
>stay motionless in my seat drenched in pepsi and unpopped kernels until the movie is over and everyone leaves

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>flamboyant homo offers pity blowjob
>accept it

at that point he can just fuck the prostitute then he wouldn't need to shoot.

prevention is better than fixing user