>Have you ever heard of the Muskoka region of Ontario? Of course you haven’t, that was rhetorical. In the land of Muskoka, there lived a land of pathetic savages called the Ojibwe. According to Ojibwe folklore, seven great spiritual beings appeared to them in order to teach them how to properly live. One of the seven great miigis was too spiritually powerful and killed the people when they were in its presence. I was in this region recently with my lovely wife when we decided to take our new boat onto Lake Joseph. As we were speeding along the shoreline of this primitive land, I noticed the silhouette of a fellow traveler ahead of us. My wife, as lovely as she is, has never been particularly observant. As we sped closer and closer, I had no desire to warn her of what was to come. Seconds before impact, I could just make out the shape of a man and a woman, as ignorant of what was about to happen as the savages who used to roam this land. As our boat caved in the skull of the woman and its propellor ripped open the abdomen of the man, all I could do was wonder if this was how the one mijii felt; To be so powerful as to bring death to those who come across you is an incredible feeling. After viewing your presentation, I can tell your future is as bleak as those boaters on Lake Joseph, and for that reason I’m out.
Have you ever heard of the Muskoka region of Ontario? Of course you haven’t, that was rhetorical...
Other urls found in this thread:
youtube.com
youtu.be
twitter.com
Dude there are Ojibwe all over northern Minnesota
Oh okay well how bout them Mavericks Mark?
I'd vote for him
>he doesnt know
is he going to jail?
>tfw I have a cottage on Lake Joseph
>have you ever been to jail?
>you have five seconds to pitch me on why I shouldn't ram my BatBoat through you and your husband, killing you instantly like the cockroaches you are
W-wait our lights are on what are you doing you mania--*BOOM*
>And for that reason, you're dead to me. I'm out.
Do you know where the accident occurred?
Everyone knows the guys cottage. Same with most celebrities on Lake Joseph
no. his wife was driving the boat.
whoa, look at mr moneybags over here
Yo, how much for 50g of coke? Do you deliver, or do I gotta pick it up on a boat?
Can he get a new wife when this one goes to jail?
reality check: he drove the boat (probably drunk) and is having his wife take the fall
Based and sharkpilled
>Right now YOU are my wife.
He probably convinced her she won't go to jail because she's a woman.
And he's probably right.
And he's right
If they're driving fast across a lake at night 100% they were drunk as skunks, probably coming back from a long day of boozing somewhere.
I really doubt the other boat had no lights on, and they should have been more careful if they could not see shit
>The small boat went across the bow of the larger craft, killing a 64-year-old Florida man
Lads Flordia Man is dead
he was on twitter a couple hours before this talking about drinking wine
Did you not read the OP?
>lethally plows into a couple with his boat
>immediately puts out press release saying he wasn't responsible
He's a good businessman but a sloppy murderer
>captcha: select the boats
lol
I would bet my life savings you are white
Probably 95% of cottage owners in Ontario are. My coworker is black and even he said cottages are a white people thing
>yfw cottage price collapses as boomers start cashing out just like the classic car market
I doubt it. Cottages aren't like houses, they typically stay in the family and get passed down to children.
Each generation then builds onto it and modernizes it
>My coworker is black and even he said cottages are a white people thing
>Ay nigga, where you at, let's hit up the cottage at Lake Joseph, bring the bicthes and some endo
Gee whiz, no shit
*visits kevin in prison
used to be middle class people would own cottages, but now housing is so fucked up in ontario that kids would rather it get sold so they can buy a condo
>new season starting in a month
>this happens
I don't want to lose my Mr. Wonderful kino
>I'll give you half a pack of smokes, and in return I get 10% of your dessert in perpetuity
>if you don't say yes in the next 10 seconds it will be 15%
>hurrr I bet since you have wealth in a white country ur white hurrrr
seething shitskin
remember how this guy was almost the leader of the conservatives
Anybody got the juggernaut copypasta?
>look up where lake joseph is
>see article about the OP post
holy shit I didn't think he'd actually killed two people, I thought this was like Raimiposting
Meme magic
Yeah most likely, cottages are huwhite and not for shitskins
>you know Kevin that reminds of the time I invested in uber
She passed a sobriety test from what I read. Maybe Kev is having her cover up him drunk and crashing into a Florida man
does kevin seem like the guy to let his wife drive the boat?
there's a good chance she wasn't even on the boat and that he picked her up after he fled the scene
Jail is for minorities and poor people. She’ll plea out to third degree manslaughter and do 100 hours community service (which will be satisfied occupying a desk at one of Kevin’s bullshit charities I’m sure).
>actually killed two people
user those are only his most recent victims.
wtf he killed two people
According to him the other boat had no navigation lights on and the boat fled the scene.
this is now a Lori thread, post your best
what a mr wonderful crash
And for that, he is out
Same until I saw a discussion about him going to jail
>imagine not ripping up to 'skokes for the long weekend
>he doesn't know about Raimi
I used to live in muskoka. It's a really nice place.
Rich people don't go to jail.
Which has better breakfast? Bass Lake Store or Memories?
that was pretty good Yea Forums is not dead yet
>he boat fled the scene
They "fled" because there were two people dead/dying and needed medical assistance asap.
Apparently, Kevin is on his gay boat a lot with his wife and friends and neighbors could not recall ever seeing her drive it. So obviously Mr. Wonderful was drunk and hit them. Afterwards, convinced his wife who wasn't drinking to take the fall.
Or Hali or Kawartha
His wife was driving the boat, so she killed two people. He said that they didn't have their lights on but that sounds like bullshit.
youtu.be
Okay, he's based
>wife never pilots boat
>kevin too drunk to legally drive, wife to take the wheel
>through female ineptitude and inexperience she kills two people and publicly humiliates her husband
really the law is to blame here. the man shouldn't have been forced to give up control of his vessel to a woman because he had a little bit of red wine.
WTF?!?!?!
You need a license in Canada to drive a boat. I wonder if she had one.
Did the other people on his boat die?
This show was hilarious when it was on. Only reason to turn on Newsworld or whatever it was called.
>Endo
I hate this nigga like you wouldn't believe and I've only heard him speak two times.
Lmao 10/10
This. His wife was breath tested at the scene and he wasn't, because apparently the police take you at your word that you weren't driving when you've just been involved in a fatal boating accident.
Canada confirmed corrupt as anywhere else.
lol
Everyone in Canada already knew that.
If anything Canada is even more corrupt than the US.
We just have better international PR, better social programs, and everyone is politely minding their own business.
Wait did the memes actually come true and O'Leary killed a couple?
found it funny how amanda is from a much wealthier family than kevin
her dad and step dad were both federal cabinent ministers
but then she would argue for protecting the middle class when kevin was actual middle class
without richfags like him muskoka might as well be north bay
Yes
Jesus this is the most hilarious thing since the baneplane crash
Muskoka is notoriously corrupt. My grandfather always gets pissed at people building what they want and just saying, lol I just gave some money to the Council people so now I don't need permits
Why would your Grandpa get pissed at that? There's few things that infuriate me more than some bum fuck council telling me what I can or can't build on my own property.
yes I'm sure you do a lot of building
>grrr those people are building a fence and a boathouse! We must stop them!
Boomer cunts
there's already enough boathouses in Greektown just go there dude
Assholes building huge boathouses up the bay that block the view
bold 25 buck bet there
You can literally get away with murder in Canada and be out in a couple years...
shark tank, more like milk tank
because you're a chucklefuck and you need your betters telling you what you can cannot build
Beautiful
It's my property nigger and the building meets code. Come try and take it down see what happens.
>since the baneplane crash
My curse is finally lifted
>I can use this as a comeback to literally any ignorant remark of mine that's shut down
epic
you'd probably suck my dick and choke on my balls, seeing as you're a flaming faggot and all
Muskoka is cottage country in Ontario, it's not even "in da woods" it's so popular with tourists and rich faggots from toronto.
>got the whole fucking lake
>manage to run over another boat
It sounds like there was a fuck party happening on that boat.
Why was some 64 year old geezer on a boat with some 48 year old married woman with kids? How embarrassing, you get caught having an affair when you are killed in a boat crash.
I love the idea of your naval murdering business, but I don't understand it and can't put it on QVC so for that reason, I'm out.