Harry potter - However

Yeah, that's the one, has a pasta to go along with it too.

Well, that's not worth much

I hate J. K. Rowling

it comes up several times you knob.
he always gets everything he needs for school and the best of the best items, like his dress robe
when exactly did you want him running around with fat stacks of cash buying name brand sports cars? hes either in school or at home in the muggle world where that money is worthless and theres no way for him to get to it anyway.

Awful opening. You don't deserve this (you)

>hes either in school or at home in the muggle world where that gold is worthless

Attached: 1507036873047.png (645x729, 58K)

Why in the fuck did Harry never give the Weasleys half his immense fortune?

>they wouldn't take it

Then Ron's parents are douchebags putting their kids through hell just because of their pride.

yes? do you not understand how currency works? or do you think businesses can just take gold coins that are recognized currency?

or are you to retarded to understand an 11 year old cant go down to a cash for gold with a bag full of weirdly minted coins and just have someone shrug and hand them cash?
this is all assuming that his uncle and aunt would let him. that he wants them to know he has money, and that the wizard government wouldnt spank his ass for revealing wizard minted gold to muggles,

you're retarded, this series is for little kids and even they can figure out this isnt a plothole

arent*

Why didn’t Harry buy an apartment for himself when he got older instead of staying with his abusive uncle and aunt? It’s not like he would need parental supervision, he can take care of himself with magic

You honestly think that the upper echelon is business and governments across the world aren't intimately involved with the wizard world?

That many of said people aren't wizards that are keeping the peace between those worlds?
Where in the fuck do you think the wizards are getting their gold?
A magical plane of existence where gold is pulled from thin air?
They have to mine that shit somehow and if they are using gold and not something else then that means that gold is precious and is rare and is useable in the muggle world as well.

He really only has to take a few coins down to a money exchanger. That's it.

>ratio of sickles to gallons is fixed in the wizarding world
>ratio of silver to gold is determined by market forces in the muggle economy
>could make infinite money in either economy by exploiting arbitrage
>nobody ever addresses the complete absurdity of the wizarding economy

It was supposed to be based on the British LSD system, but Rowling was writing a kids book and didn't think it through.

>He really only has to take a few coins down to a money exchanger. That's it.
again
how, when, and where

hes either at away at a boarding school or under the strict thumb of his abusive aunt and uncle who would steal all his money the second he got it anyway

Explained already
The sacrificial protection his mother gave only stays if he's in a place of a relative of blood

Make it one of those stupid secret places like grimmald place and make Ron his secret keeper. Safer than living with his aunt and uncle

>46737▶
>Why did they pretend this scene never existed?
Writer wants her cake and eat it too

Which part of “blood relative” could you not comprehend?

Much too hard to keep the logistic and there's not many places left that's unplottable anymore

he means this one
youtube.com/watch?v=y4UHLadWAvc

Fine. Let him live at fucking hogwarts then.

>be a wizard
>make/steal 100s of nukes
>sell to countries for billions
>ministry of magic tries to stop u, nuke them, basically nuke anyone who tries to stop u

>or literally any mining company u can out compete because u pay ZERO overhead

>robbing literally any place with expensive jewelery (for example crown jewels)

The fuck was she even thinking, she said 1 galleon is approx. 6.60 USD. Holy fuck does she even economics

>You honestly think that the upper echelon is business and governments across the world aren't intimately involved with the wizard world?

we know the prime minister know about the wizard world and know very little.
you are telling me that harry should go to the fucking prime minister to sell him magic currency?

>implying the ministry of magic would be ok with him selling their currency to a a money exchanger

>implying nobody would question a jobless minor now rolling in cash

also to do fucking what? he can't leave their uncles house

why complain about gold when you can complain about the time twister or how magic works in general

The entire point of Harry being forced back to his relatives was to set up the emotional pacing of each book. JK Rowling wasn't just content to grab the audience once with the poor orphan abused child gets spirited away to a wonderful magical castle hook, no, she wanted it to occur every time she wrote a new HP story.

And can you blame her? It worked. Every story began with Harry in the doldrums, then something cool would happen like Hagrid, a flying car, the knight-bus, or a dementor invasion. Then Harry would have like a month or so of peace as he catches up with the delightful array of wizarding chums he's accumulated, maybe he'd even have a harmless scrap with Malfoy and his goons. Then Halloween would arrive, Harry would be reminded of his parents deaths, get sad and then something terrible would happen. It was formulaic perfection.

>we know the prime minister know about the wizard world and know very little.
>you are telling me that harry should go to the fucking prime minister to sell him magic currency?
>>implying the ministry of magic would be ok with him selling their currency to a a money exchanger
>>implying nobody would question a jobless minor now rolling in cash
>also to do fucking what? he can't leave their uncles house
>why complain about gold when you can complain about the time twister or how magic works in general

You're a fucking retard.

why quote all the post?
first day on 4chen?

DUDE
SIX SIX SIX
LMAO

>Weasley's
user, even Dobby is richer than Weasleys.

Harry's butthole was becoming more and more painful. Skeet oozed out of the brown butthole. There were several frantic mice trapped inside it. "Ouch, ooh!" he said. He stood up. "Back in a minute...er...bathroom". Harry hurried up the stairs to the hall, where he dashed into the bathroom and bolted the door again. Grunting with pain, he slumped over the black toilet. "OOOHH, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, arse, cocks!" said Harry. His arse exploded foamy-brown butt-potion into the toilet (grunting and shitting noises). Fabulous poo spurted everywhere and Harry felt hugely relieved. Harry bent forward, took a deep breath and plunged his face into the toilet and it was blissful oblivion, better than September 11th (evil-sounding chuckle).

Attached: 1566916480248.png (361x500, 260K)

Hermione said, very fast, "Harry? Harry!" Hermione was pounding on the door. He opened his eyes, shit coming thick and fast. His hands jerked upward to cover his mouth. Harry started vomiting so hard, that he did not even notice as Hermione was pounding on the door again. "Harry, open up!" "(Retch) No, (retch) no!" He choked and retched as he splattered the bathroom with some flying chunks of vomit. He got up and unbolted the door. Hermione toppled inside at once. She looked quite demented and looked around, suspiciously. The bathroom was full of great lumps of POO. Gigantic shitpiles everywhere. They looked like gingerbread houses. The bathroom smelled bad. Ron was right behind Hermione, jerking off furiously. "I'm doing it, I'm doing-, ooh, ooh, OOOOHHH, fuck, (grunting and cumming noises)". Ron's cock exploded thick, white CUMMM into his mouth and swallowed it (swallowing noises). He did not want to let his skeet spill out at her naked arse, but it was hard to keep his big erection. "Golden shower!" screamed Hermione and a jet of water streamed from her cunt, engulfing a spluttering and choking Harry Potter, hehehehe!! "More?" said Hermione. "Yeah, it was hot!" said Ron, who was evidently aroused. Hermione whizzed over them, causing both Harry and Ron to CUMMM everywhere. "Oh yeah, (grunt, cumming noises)". "I love you, Hermione" said Ron, sinking back into his chair, rubbing his bag.

"What were you doing?" asked Hermione, sternly. "What do you think I was doing?" asked Harry, with a trickle of poo. "You were yelling your head off!" said Ron. Harry did not want to drop mud upon the carpet. "Oh, yeah, I must've dozed off or...jack it (jerking noises)". There was a horrible swelling so that it was larger than ever. "Oh, I'm cumming!" said Harry (grunt, cumming noises). Thick, white cum spurted everywhere. "Good game, Harry" gasped Hermione. "Harry, please finger me," said Hermione, taking deep breaths, "we know your butthole hurt downstairs and you're drenched in wet poo. It was hot." He could sense Hermione's excitement too. "Fine". Harry sat down on the edge of the bath. Beneath the robe, he fingered Hermione. "C-crabs!" shouted Harry and pushed the brown out of his arse. "Give it, give it, give it, give it, yeah! Skeet, skeet, skeet, skeet, skeet". Hermione was biting her lip. "Oh, oh, give it, yeah!" said Hermione and the cum flew out (groan, cumming noises). Harry bent forward, took a deep breath and plunged his face into the silvery substance and it was blissful oblivion, better than large white roses in their buttholes. "Can you feel it, though?" Ron asked in a hushed voice, as he held it tight in his clenched fist, "It went inside me. I could feel it, it was hot!" Hermione was bleeding.

Much gulping of CUUUUUMMM, Harry strolled downstairs, naked. The side of his head and neck were drenched in wet poo. He was digging his fingers into his arse as if he was trying to find something for breakfast. He pulled the pieces of brown poo out of his arse and, without looking at them, tucked them away in Hagrid's mouth. "(Spluttering noises) Oi!" said Hagrid, indignantly. There was silence as Hagrid digested this poo. Ron laughed. Harry fiddled aimlessly with his chink cock (cumming noises). Harry sat down and took a sumptuous dung heap on his uncle, where Hagrid was still attempting to ease his pulsating cock through Harry's back door. His cock was large. "What the fuck?" shouted Harry, jerking off Hagrid's huge, hairy, fucking cock. Harry's hot arse was now too full of cock to take any more. Harry was bleeding. It felt wonderful. There was a brief silence, in which the distant echo of Hagrid's big, sumptuous cock smashing down a wooden front door seemed to reverberate through his arse, causing both Harry and Ron to gag on their cocks. He had spilled his own cum more times than he could count. Harry's large, purple cock was cumming (cumming noises). Hot and wet skeet was trickling down his chin and from Dumbledore's body.

Hello, this is Jim Dale. I hope you have enjoyed this unabridged Listening Library production of Dirty Potter and the Cum Farts by J.K. Rowling. She smelled bad. As you know, audiobooks kill Dumbledore and are a wonderful way to get excited when your hands are busy jerking off the gays listening to Dirty Potter. But have you ever considered Dirty Potter being good for you?...(yeah). Most of us know from first-hand experience just how beneficial it is to jack it to the children in our lives. I feel that little boy. Listening to Dirty Potter helps children build vocabulary, improve their reading skills, fart nuts-gook-nigger-cocks-buttholes, cum and succeed more readily in school. Now, I can't read. HAHA!! Harry Potter, hehehehe! P-p-p-p-p-pineapple, pineapple, pineapple, fucking pineapple (yeah). Being read to is an important step on the road to becoming a good HOUSE ELF and one of the best ways to ensure a lifelong love of buttholes. 'Scuse me, mate, can you take your bum out of my face? Umm...um, um, bu-bu-bu, umm, and erm...uh, I just...cum. Sometime your mouth is full of cum. Now, I can't read. But few of us have all the time we would like to swim in Dumbledore's sumptuous custard. Wheeeee, God, that's revolting! That's where Dirty Potter can help (skeet, skeet). Instead of letting a child turn on the television or pop in a gook video game, try pressing 'gay' and engaging them in a good CUUUUUMMM. Listening to Dirty Potter has the same educational value as two enormous shitpiles (I can't even read the book) and they are great entertainment for trips in the Hippogriff Fuckbeak at home when no one is available to give it to them. A wide range of niggers guaranteed to smell bad to children of 10 years old. So, the next time you're, consider, considering what, consider, to listen to, why not, consider, considering something for the gays in your life.

(Groaning, slowly raising in pitch, and cumming noises) Long live Dirty Potter! "But it was supposed to have sopped," said J.K. Rowling, "it wasn't supposed to do this anymore!" "HAHA! Fuck J.K. Rowling" said Jim Dale...(yeah).

Attached: 1565250733095.jpg (807x659, 42K)

Hey Jim. I didn't like it as much as the one with that quite hilarious reference to Snape's dick suddenly going limp.

People don't have 7 kids coz they're mentally stable

It's clearly a dig at welfare poors in britain who live off the dole and think "oh i don't need anyone's help, i'm so brave and selfless" meanwhile shitting out 7 kids acting like they're a great family.
she even spells it out - their 2 oldest kids immediately moved away from the COUNTRY and the 3rd oldest rats out the family to the government coz of his disdain for them

>be me
>orphan mudblood
>reading r/wsb while on hol from hogwarts
>start a robinhood account to hoodwink some of the great houses out of their galleons in the gold futures market
>great success
>goblin shows up at my house
>defenestrates me with magic sword and gets auror to wipe the memory of app developers to reset all my account activity

People should read the far superior kingkiller chronicles where the protag is poor but sometimes makes money and this comes up 30 times a chapter.

>*tax policy feelings intensifies*

Books talked about his father as a rich bastard in school.

Thinking about it this the ultimate wageslave fantasy. You have a miserable life and suddendly you get into a new world where u are gigarich and in the most elite prestigious group of people.

No wonder why everyone born on this generation is depressed. They grow up with this shit as children and then they have to deal with working 8 h a day for shekelberg doing menial tasks.

Wizards are fucking dumb. Magic rotted their brains - no nukes for them.

Konosuba-tier

I only saw Harry Potter one I thought that movie was shit and never picked it up

The real issue here is that Harry Potter is a story for children, and most millennials never stopped being children.

Most of that shit is gifted to him, no? Nimbus 2001, the firebolt, marauders map, invisibility cloak. All these were gifted to him.

This is a fucking fact. Them having 7 kids always made me hate them. They brought this shit on themselves. Doesn't Molly know "Fetus Deletus"? Jesus fucking Christ. At least based Percy made something of himself.

When Harry needed a broom within the very same book, they were acting like it was an impossibility. Then McGonagall gifts him the top of the line Nimbus 2000, just in time for the quidditch match.

Not cutting the Goblins in for 30% and fuck over wizards left right and centre

certainly enough to buy new broomsticks for his entire quiditch team without significant cost to his bank, or at the very least without needing a new one as a gift from a mysterious stranger, right? that's the only thing that contradicts his money than I can think of. when the death eaters take over the bank I'm sure they cleaned out his shit, too, so he's definitely destitute while they were in power.

Brainwashed cuck.

"AAAAAH!"

Do they ever explain how the magic world has escaped exposure by any dingleberry with a phone camera or $200 drone yet?

Why don't you give me half of your money

Gold buying shops get wierd custom minted coins all the time

Harry Potter is conveniently set in the years before 2000. So the answers to this question need never be pondered.

It goes to his tuition. Hogwarts is the free. That loot is all gone by year 3 and he has wizard student loans.

But not entire fucking assloads of them.

Well that's convenient!

zoomlets don't remember this (because they weren't alive yet) but the books were written in the 1990s.

How do you think people like the Blacks or Malfoys got so rich?

Has there ever been a fictional universe more devoid of logic then Harry Potter? Rowling is such a hack

Holy based

>I’m a wizard so I can teleport, paralyse people, move things with the wave of a wand, polymorph myself and render myself invisible
>but I can’t cast a spell or approach a foundry or dental lab to get these weird gold coins melted into ingots and assayed
user, trying to make Rowling’s feminine logic fit the real world is like trying to stuff an angry bear into a burlap sack- pointless, unrewarding and futile. This the woman who invented a convoluted sport with flying balls and broomsticks that were basically totally irrelevant to the outcome.

the currency is worthless in the muggle world because why the fuck would a wizard ever pay for anything with real world currency when they so many useful spells and magical items to exploit muggles?

Attached: magic.jpg (720x479, 80K)

>u
>u
>u
>u
Did someone just open a portal to the fourteen year old faggot dimension?

First, it was set in the 90's. Second, only specific, mechanical types of technology work around wizards, because they're so fucking weird they fry electronics whenever somebody brings some close to a large congregation of wizards, Diagon alley, Hogwarts, Hogsmeade, etc