What would be YOUR coaching philosophy?

same as Guardiola and Klopp: feed my players with PEDs

Who's your starting 11? There's a lot of low key gays running around in the Prem these days.

As an aside, it warms my heart that Cole and Pennant are still going strong as a couple after all these years. They must have been a couple for over 15 years at this point.

It's a simple Washing Machine Flying Back Sweeper Keeper setup.

The 5 midfielders are constantly circling around eachother, at any moment prime to either attack or defend, keeping the other teams midfield and defensive lines on their toes. The wing backs fly up the field to deliver the ball into the free floating "spy" strikers who will enter the washing machine in the mid to get lost in the chaos, and making their runs our of there.

The one center back is the fastest person on the field and barely leaves the edge of the 18, as he is tasked with cleaning up the long balls sent by the opposition defense. That's where the sweeper keeper comes in, providing backup.

In the odd case that they both get beat and the opposition scores, you have to rely on your offense already being up.

Based on my shadow boxing and elite mental capacity, I estimate 10 goals scored to ever 1 goal conceded.

It's simple really, not sure why it hasn't been implemented

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Han söt!

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Long balls crosses and dirty physical defense

two pacy mutts with double barreled names on the wings
big guy up front in the middle
everyone hoofs to big guy

You call it cringe now, but wait till you see where I take leeds with it when I get a full season to implement it

Just score sum fookin goals

Four four fackin two

10 cbs, defend all game, proper man to man marking then charge the opposition goal all at once in the last 30 seconds

To be honest, aside from ronaldo, ibra, pique, jorginho and sterling I’m not too sure

simple as really

Play a full 60 minutes, be aggressive on the forecheck and backcheck, transition hard through the neutral zone and maintain position on the entry, finish your checks, get pucks deep and drive into the dirty areas, keep it simple and just shoot pucks at the net, keep it disciplined and don't take stupid penalties.

Fuckin trippin and rippin bud. Getting pucks down low

>clap
>vamos
>clap
3 UCL in a row please

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>check trips
>can't see the puck

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Go out there and have fun boys, it's a game!
>collect my incredibly high wage

Play the guardiolaball control game but also stick a 6'6 target man on the wing and hit switches to him whenever they're on

Jack Reynolds, Rinus Michels, Stefan Kovacs.

>use 3 CBs
>injure my opponent's best player
>1 CB gets red card, play 2 CBs rest of the game
>park the bus, only counter-attacks allowed

12 hours of cock and ball torture after every loss

>Man coverage. No zone
youtu.be/XEeVM2M75d0

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incredible coaching, offensive plan that doesn't risk much, eats the clock, and a defense that causes stops and turnovers. just solid gameplan and execution
2nrgs

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Divegrass
>4-4-2
>Heave it up to the big lad
>Head it on for the other pacey forward
Apehoop
>Man on man defense
>Pick and Roll every possession for 2 points exclusively
Handegg
>RUN THE DAMN BALL
>46 defense
Base(d)ball
>Steal bases every opportunity
>Squeeze plays all the time

blackmail and bribery

Benzema

Pucks on net bud

Fight and win

Hoofball

>Big fuck off centre back with a name like John, Steve, or Ray.
>Big fuck off Striker. Head it in my son. Go on son.
>None of that fucking foreign skill muck, stepover into a two foot tackle.
>Need a nasty fucker in centre mid, bring me Vinny.

Neuer or Mendy?

t. Jesse Marsch

This post made me kek.

your job is to pinch the fuck out of the oppostion when the ref isn't looking. pinch skin, pinch arses, pinch the back of necks. constantly call the opponents fat. call into question their spouse's fidelity

but conceição is the one perma seething, he's the opposite of mourinho and simeone

>boys, im gonna need you to go out there and bully the refs. really fuck their shit up famm. on 3 get fucked, you ready? ONE. TWO. THREE.
>"GET FUCKED!!"
>alright lets get out there and titty fuck the fat ones, boys.

>Other than bilardismo

11 centrebacks

4-2-3-1 constant press and hard tackles on shitters or known divers.

The "just hoof it to the pacey guy infront la", for me

KMS b/c soccer is gay and has none of the advanced strategies of real sports.

Constant runs from deep:
>pacy midfielder bombs up the field ready to receive a pass from the defence while forwards drop back

That's it, just constant runs from deep

no niggers in squad

jogo bonito

To just fackin run around a bit

You got the joke. Toke up leaf brother

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hoof it to the big guy

If a 442 works,vwhy wouldn't a 224. Simply overwhelm the ithervream

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ONLY DAWGS ALLOWED ON THIS TEAM

It’s not seething but I get what you mean and I need his football to be able to win, Simeone and Mourinho alone won’t get me very far in this day and age. Plus, I like his no nonsense attitude, Mourinho is too passive agressive and Simeone is too nice in comparison.

>no women physio's
based

based, hoof it to the big man up top, and have 10 absolute hammer throwers in behind him breaking legs

Win

raising my eyebrow

Destroy and Exit