Why didn't Ross, the largest friend, simply eat the other friends?

why didn't Ross, the largest friend, simply eat the other friends?

Attached: 24-ross-friends.w700.h700.jpg (700x700, 169K)

jew

jew

HE ATE ONE ALRIGHT

>Ross sits at the dining table in Moncia's apartment
>"Thanks for making me a moistmaker, even though it isn't Thanksgiving..."
>Monica rubs his back in a consoling way
>"Its really no problem, food is a good way to get over a breakup, trust me I would know"
>Ross takes a bite of his moistmaker and moans in pure bliss
>"Man this is so good!"
>Monica sits down
>"You know Ross, making you food takes me back to our teenage years..."
>Ross' mind clicks, its another one of those nights, those hot nights that always end in pleasure and a ping of pain
>"Yeah..." Ross puts his sandwich down "You know, Im hungry for something else"
>Monica smirks, knowing whats about to come next
>"A...different kind of moistmaker. C'mere"
>Ross pushes his chair back exposing his knee, ripe for sitting.

>Monica takes the invitation in stride, she gets up and sits down on his lap
>Ross can feel the heat between her legs already, her face so close that he can smell her intoxicating perfume, freshly picked lilacs and coconut it reminds him of their time in Barbados
>That vacation between the conferences Ross and Monica had a little time to themselves exploring their ripe bodies
>Monica knew Ross' mind was already foggy, his eyes got that gloss sometimes, she would need to make the first move
>their lips connected, and soon their tongues in carnal pleasure
>moans slipped out of Monica's mouth, it was hard to keep quiet when she was with Ross. Chandler or Richard never made her feel this way, only her brother
>Ross' hand started to explore her contours, her tight belly, her back, her hard nipples, he gave them a soft squeeze, giving Monica an electric wave across her body
>Ross' hands went down though, below, she was already slick, he two thick fingers entered with ease
>"Oh god!" Monica whispered into his ear
>"No god, just me" Ross replied

>Everything after that was a blur, they both undid their pants as quickly as possible, muscle memory kicked in
>Monica jumps up on the table, opening her legs for her brother, jet black pubes making a landing strip for his thick cut member
>he thrusts himself into her, the first pump always gave a little pain to Monica, so he did it quick, like ripping off a bandaid
>Monica hugs him, letting out a puff of hot air to tickle his ear with every thrust he makes
>its not long, but they both get to where they want to go, within minutes they both climax
>Ross pulls out in time, spilling his hot thick cum on Monica's belly
>Monica never let anyone else do this stuff to her, after all she was a germophobe, but for some reason, when Ross did it, it didn't make her skin crawl
>she dragged her finger across her toned stomach and even licked a bit, letting out a little giggle, back in her old days she would have ate it all, like everything she ate, but she needed to watch her figure
>Monica walks over to the sink, he tight ass wiggling, using warm water to wash off Ross' seed
>Ross just buckled his black leather pants up again
>they quietly took their own ways, they usually did this, afterwards came the shame, the realization
>Rachel saw everything from Ross' apartment her mouth agape
>what did she witness? why did she watch it all? why did she finger herself and climax like no time before?
>she looks down at her right hand, seeing the wetness, the physical evidence of what she did
>she quickly wipes it off on her shirt and throws it in the washer, no need to ride it today

unironically erection inducing literature

He was too busy bullying Easy company

now do a raep scene

Why didn't Sneed, the largest seed, simply feed the other Chucks?

Ted Mosby is relentlessly handsome. I want to kiss him relentlessly.

>"We were on a BREAK!" Ross yelled. Rachel stood her ground, she wasn't going to be taunted anymore. "We weren't Ross, and if you could keep you small dick holstered none of this would be happening"
>Ross charges at her like a bull but stops short, he takes a deep breath and collects himself. "You fucking cunt".
>"oooh, a cunt is what I am now? well maybe Ill get some oral from your ex-wife then! Not like I got it within the past year from you!"
>SMACK Ross backhands her in the right cheek, she tumbles to the ground, crumpled like a meek piece of paper.
>"I fucked mark"
>"FINE BY ME!" Ross runs out of the apartment.

>"Well THAT was awkward" Chandler chuckles to himself. Monica, Chandler, and Joey were in the kitchen the entire time.
>Joey slams down his sandwich in anger. "He just fucking hit her and the only thing you can do is crack dumb jokes Chandler?"
>Chandler backs up a bit and straightens his tie "Well seems to me like she deserved it."
>Joey looks on in confusion "What? Shes bruised look! Monica come on back me up..."
>Monica cant meet eye to eye to Joey "Well, Ross is my brother..."
>Joey runs to Rachel and tends to her small wound "L-look, I don't know what happened but Im gonna go and talk to Ross after I help you"
>Joey picks her up like a new bride with his taught muscles "So...were you being real about the cunnilingus?"
>"Yeah..." Rachel sheepishly says
>"Well, how you doin'?" Joey stares into her jewel like eyes
>"I'm with Mark, Joey" Joey immediately drops her on the hardwood floor, her arm makes a small *crick* noise, Rachel screams in pain.
>"JOEY DOESN'T SHARE FOOD!" Joey goes back to his sandwich and eats vigorously

Gay

Am I the only one insanely attracted to Ted?

>Tonight was the night. It was finally going to happen. Joey was going to fuck Phoebe.
>On nights like this Joey didn't eat anything. He needed to keep spry, limber, and light on his feet. His stomach was growling fierce, but he knew he couldn't eat that 8 inch meatball in the freezer.
>It was about 11:50 PM. Now was the time. Chandler was asleep in his room. Rachel and Monica were going to head to bed soon. Phoebe would have to leave the apartment.
>Joey looks through his peephole waiting for that purple door to open. His chicken clucked, he shushed him to be quiet. He watched the door with wide, dry eyes.
>He had his cock in his hands, fondling it. Not quite erect, but getting pumped with blood.
>The purple door opened. Phoebe gave a goodbye hug to Monica and then made her way to the exit.
>Joey slipped on the nylon mask, took off his jogging pants and then made his way down the stairs, quietly following Phoebe.

haha good one, upvoted my friend

Go on...

bump

Perhaps they are saving that for sweeps.

Wasn't Monica like 300 lbs when she was younger? How strong are Ross' quads?

>Joey watched Phoebe make her way down the stairs, his cock hung, feeling the cold air from the stariwell
>Phoebe's ass might have been shrouded by the flowing clothes, but you could still make out every curve, her ass was ripe, like an apple ready to fall from the tree onto Newton's head
>Phoebe rounded the corner to the next flight of stairs, but saw something on the left corner of hey eyes. A Man, fully need with a nylon mask. She shrieked in terror.
>Joey was fast. Faster than Phoebe could scream. He padded down the stairs in his bare feet and clapped his hand over her mouth all before her purse could hit the ground. His italian hands muffled the sound quite well.
>Joey was rock hard now. All those nights of imagination coming to fruition. When he put the mask on he was something else. Someone else.
>He ripped her acid washed jeans off with frightening speed. Phoebe hammered on his shoulders as hard as she could, but this pile of muscles took the beating in stride. Each hit landed, and she could feel the large cock throb. He had the Unagi.
>He entered her. Despite all the struggle he entered her. Her hands squeezed her tight tits. The nipples were hard from the cold. He licked her neck and slowly moved to her mouth. He grunted in a deep voice "You bite me, and your women friends upstairs get it too". He removed his hand and then let his tongue explore her mouth. They tasted of Monica's cooking.
>The event lasted all of 58 seconds before he pulled out and came on her Maxi top. He let go of her and she fell down to the ground in a heap of tears and sadness. They all did. Monica didn't cry until he was done. Rachel, weirdly, reached orgasm, something Joey read up on, it was common. Ross cried all the way through. The funny thing, they never talked about it. No one ever went to the police.
>Phoebe looked up at him. Eye liner smearing. "Joey?"
>He didn't know how she found out. But she did. His blood ran ice.
>"How you doin'?" he said sheepishly

He's a big guy

>He had the Unagi.
MY FUCKING SIDES

>"How you doin'?" he said sheepishly
I am dead

Based

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WE SALUTE THE RANK, NOT THE MAN.

For you

Bravo

Wait, why did he leave Chandler out?

Because they're friends duh.

i see someone is rewatching futurama

He was sympathetic to little Chandler's unbirthing agenda.

> Ross cried all the way through

Megakeks