You didn't put that truckstop toilet seat back down after using it

>you didn't put that truckstop toilet seat back down after using it
>now, for the rest of your life you will have a tube forced into your mouth that's connected to that very same toilet
>i'm working on arranging a trucker festival right next door to it, with free guinness and chilli for all truckers over 350 pounds, only if they use the truckstop toilet next door
>unless...... you can pat your head and rub your stomach whilst singing the alphabet backwards

Attached: Sawiii.jpg (350x233, 71K)

Other urls found in this thread:

vocaroo.com/i/s1sk3wzRzuQd
youtube.com/watch?v=RjL7biSSStE
twitter.com/AnonBabble

Based
More please

>so user, we looked through your posting history and you used the term braphog 100 times more than your second most used term (which was sneed(?) by the way)

Remember that time you bought those doritos and dew at the local store and didn't thank the cashier? Well now you'll have to eat and drink all the doritos and dew in the store while the cashier whips your dick and balls red raw.

Let the game begin.

>you never once took a sick day off work
>you never took the time to enjoy life
>now your limbs will be crushed while on fire
>maybe you can enjoy your death, you choose

classic paul dano

>always taking a penny never leaving one, the key to the trap is hidden in this pile of pennies can you resist your greed and unlock the device before your jaw is snapped in half? Let the game begin

remove the third line and this would be funnier

Remember when that nigga was in Stargate.

>you borrowed a pen and didn't return it
>now we will stick pens up your urethra

Joke's on you, that's my fetish!

>you didnt donate a dollar to charity for starving children while you were buying groceries
>now youll be force fed junk food until your stomach ruptures

I have to pay bills :(

>user, you give unsolicited advice on Yea Forums threads
>now, you will have to eat a weeks worth of comicon toilet waste

>You always believed that cunnyposting was funny and a good pleb filter from GoT/capeshit redditors.
>As punishment for your insolence, a fat half-Mexican unpaid volunteer (with the skin colour of diarrhea) will ban you for three days.
>There will be absolutely no way to prevent that unless you are prepared to reset your router to change your dynamic IP, as few men would.
>LET THE GAMES BEGIN.

Attached: He does it for free.jpg (600x603, 46K)

>you posted BLACKED threads in Yea Forums at any and all given moments of the day
>now you will be forced to suck off men blindfolded while they screech ebonics, only to have your blindfold taken off and see that they are only men in blackface

kek

I wish I had this man's voice.

> Hello user, I'd like to play a game.
> Remember that girl you had a crush on in ninth grade? Do you remember how she invited you over to her house for "homework" and you turned her down? Instead of finding love and becoming a real man you've turned into a lonely self pitying wreck on the path of self destruction.
> In front of you is a movie projection of the life you'd have had if you said yes. To the right of you is a gun with a single bullet. If you can endure watching all those wonderful moments you will never have without shooting yourself, you will be free to go.
> Your choice.

I'm not depressed but I dint know if I could do it . I've been thinking about all my wasted opportunities a lot lately...

>snoke?

Attached: tenor.gif (280x358, 1.18M)

np i love shit

that would mean he's magic. so the plan would be endure the film and throw a magic jew catcher rope around his neck and force him to transport you to the better timeline

Attached: 1564155107030.jpg (648x960, 80K)

>you ate the pizza slice but didn't finish he crust
>you are too used to luxury and need a lesson
>i will put you in a room with a hole in the roof, a crust will fall in the room every minute
>prove you lust for crust and live or die

>when you're so woke you ruin your child's entire life for social media brownie points

What the fuck was his problem?

>Naming your son like a portmanteau of all the Wayans brothers combined.
The game was fucked from the start for that boy, and his new name being an homage to midgekino just confirms it.

Attached: Kicking It.jpg (474x266, 34K)

>now you will be forced to suck off men blindfolded
Literally a dream of mine.

literally achievable within an hour on CL

* HONK HONK

high iq post
kek

It's not the same if I'm not forced to do it.

vocaroo.com/i/s1sk3wzRzuQd

HAHA YES!

kino.

Last line busted my chaps hard

Attached: E0E8D00B-BB8C-4251-B7AB-A2935D36CC54.jpg (640x640, 246K)

What is he saying before "we'll jack you off mercilessly" at 24 seconds?

>implying any girl has ever invited me to do anything
I wish I had received signs and not noticed them, it seems better than just getting absolutely nothing for 25 years

Attached: already dead.png (572x662, 122K)

based
"You are here because of your incessant sneedposting. every time the simpsons would come up, you would ruin potential conversation about a classic animated series. you will be stuck here for the rest of your life, and your only nutrition will be your own semen. a robotic arm will jack you off mercilessly, over, and over, right into your own mouth. you will truly experience what it is like... to feed, and seed."

>a robotic arm
Oh, okay. Thanks for the captions user.

based

this sounds great, how do I sign up?

can you do a janny one

Based

youtube.com/watch?v=RjL7biSSStE

>You greedily helped your friend through his alcoholism even though it was his only joy in life. You took away the one thing he loved, and now you will learn that pain. You have been locked in a 24 hour bar with an unlimited tab. Your only sustenance is vodka and pretzels, the big warm ones with cheese. Sounds easy, right? Well it's also full of free strippers. Let's see how long you last until you're a dried up shell of the man you once were.
Live or die, the choice is yours

How long would you guys last?

MOAR!

The Saw movies are fucking great lads why did no one tell me this before

>lust for crust
Heh

because they got labeled as "torture porn" when they're actually really great drama/horror films

True Kino

If I can touch the strippers, not long at all.

>you thought that posting the n word on a blue board was all fun and games
>you even like to say the n word when you think none is listening
>I was
>now you will know what its like to be different...
>you are strapped into a dentist chair with only your non-dominant hand free
>you must draw and correctly label the map of Africa, humanity's birthplace, in no less than twenty minutes
>after the timer is up ill release three by loads of drunk frat boys armed with permanent markers
>black markers
>if your pretty little map isn't done...
>we'll see who the nigga really is