Be winning 50-0

It hit a generation of kids at the right time and had an incredible PR campaign. That’s all I can think of. I was exactly the same age as Harry when Sorc came out and my classmates went ballistic over it. I think that explains a lot of movie phenomenons.

Yep. It's not that big of a lead given how fast-paced the game is.
This happens in one of the books, although it may have just been mentioned in passing.
It's kind of sad that wizards have all these spectacular powers but then their sports and even fights are just so mundane. My friends and I once made up this wizard game called Wizard Golf where it's like normal golf, but other wizards can fuck with you by casting spells and turning the ball into a bird and then scaring the bird to fly off in another direction, or move the hole, or turn the club into rubber, or whatever you could think of, and you'd be able to do the same. But no, way cooler to make a sport where it's balls through hoops, like I've never heard of basketball before. Fuck, even wizarding basketball would be so cool if you could turn the ball into a boulder or some shit.
As for fights, the wizard duel in 1963's The Raven is a thousand times more interesting than anything in Harry Potter, and it was done with zero budget (but infinite imagination): youtube.com/watch?v=xHunA6CYHvo

When it stopped reading like a screenplay and actually became something vaguely resembling a book

Such a needlessly contrived "sport" is just one example of the confused worldbuilding that underlies the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

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I was 1 or 2 years older than Harry when it came out and fortunately I was a pleb who cared too much about being able to relate to the main character, and there was no way I'd relate to a younger kid with friends who acted like dumb children in a happy childish world.
It was that and pure chance my mom got me the Jason Bourne novels and I was really into Dragonlance, or else I might have fallen for this shit and become obsessed for 12 more years.

this is what happens when a woman tries to come up with a sport lol

>Such a needlessly contrived "sport" is just one example of the confused worldbuilding that underlies the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises
7/10, very well

Prisoner of Azkaban and onward. They let her pen out most of Chamber of Secrets and chopped out the sillier parts, but Prisoner and beyond were all ghost written, which is when the story gets more mature and loses all it's stupid real world references, Quidditch takes a huge backseat, and a focus on how the past affects the present is introduced.

Take for example the whole horcrux debacle. If Rowling was really in charge of writing the whole series, why did Voldemort leave such an important item in the care of the Malfoys, why did he not react to it's destruction, and why would he not severely punish the Malfoys when he resurrected and discovered that Lucius had let the diary be destroyed?

Also we know for certain Fantastic Beasts was written by her, and it and her other post Harry Potter works read nothing like books 3-7. Did rowling suddenly become competent for a few years between 2000-2006? Of course not.

I've read every book in the original series and have seen all the original movies, but I have no interest in this series anymore whatsoever.

>be losing 0-600
>start mounting a comeback
>score is 490-650
>your seeker catches the snitch
>lose 640-650

>Did rowling suddenly become competent for a few years between 2000-2006?
Do I hear praise for the harry potter series from Yea Forums?

Who cut math from the curriculum

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I haven't read fantastic beasts (or that other, , unrelated book she wrote after harry potter) so I dunno; it makes sense they could get ghost writers after the success of those first books

I had lost interest when the 6th book was released, but kept going just so I could finish it

What the fuck kind of ending shot is this?

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>atlas shrugged next to les mis
>huckleberry finn and to kill a mockingbird next to harry potter
If you take this chart seriously and agree with it I sincerely need you to kill yourself.

DEH

>Did rowling suddenly become competent for a few years between 2000-2006?
Maybe. Bestselling authors have editors and assistants who guide the writing and plan out shit.
Maybe she was ordered to read some book series to guide her and her readings permeated to the writing. It's been known to happen.
Writers always keep changing / improving their stories and style as time passes.

I don't know if she wrote any other non fantady stuff outside of Vacancy Whatever, and that books (whatever its name) did not read like Rowling at all.

How new?

should I read the books?

Yep. In sports that's known as "the agony of defeat."

to kill a mockingbird should be below hp to be honest

You know that Harry Potter - He's gatta go fast!
>*don't you
>forget about me*

>*don't don't don't don't*

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You know, that really pisses me off: all the essential shit like learning to read and math and shit is almost entirely non-existent. I think they take one class of reading in their first year but that's seriously it. Then you consider all the archaic language that spellbooks would use and how would they ever learn that shit in just a single year of reading class? This school for magic is unrealistic!

Nah its decent literature even if you have a profound dislike for black people. Like, it advances the craft even if you're a /pol/ baboon who despises its substance

How's ya first day champ?

>zoomer thinks calling something competent=praise

a generation of mediocrity

But the Seeker is the SPECIALEST and MOST IMPORTANTEST position who literally ends the game and usually wins for their team when they catch the snitch, so that's why it had to exist even though it is a dumbfuck retarded idea if you try to apply normal sports logic to it. Also literally the pay2win position because the best and fastest brooms are obviously the most important tools to have for catching the snitch

>should I read the books?
From this list? (). Absolutely.
Just avoid the memes (Atlas Shrugged, Kanye, etc).
Harry Potter books? Don't waste your time.

Listen to the audio books, there is an English gent who does an enchanting read and its good fun for a month or so. There are some genuinely interesting moments and characters, such as Harry's uncle and hagrid, or locations like the forbidden forest .

>people seriously debating whether quidditch is retarded or not

The entire point is that the rules are retarded. It's bait to sell the books in the american market, playing off the 'oh those wacky brits' vibe which hadn't been done to death back in 1992 or whenever. The name sounds crazy and the rules are a nonsense. It's like numberwang. You all got trolled.

Hogwarts is far superior to any education system in the world.

>Children left with their parents till 11 to be taught basic reading and math 1-on-1
>Advanced mathematics is an optional elective for only high achievers, plebs aren't burdened with trig they'll never use again in their lives

Nah, senpai. It's timely and has great prose for its demographic.

What's stopping you from assigning half of the team to defend while the other half searches for the snitch?

>Children left with their parents till 11 to be taught basic reading and math 1-on-1
Home schooling in real life generally doesn't work that well. I can't imagine it'd work any better for wizards.
>Advanced mathematics is an optional elective for only high achievers, plebs aren't burdened with trig they'll never use again in their lives
If you're going to be making potions, things like advanced math would be fundamental. Potions being comparable to chemistry in the real world, well, you need trigonometry for chemistry.

Only designated keeper can defend, as we've seen there is nothing keeping bludgers from aggressing the seeker, so if I saw the other team doing what you suggested I'd gave my bludgers beat the seeker down. You aren't playing any of the 3 balls so you could probably lose just on basic points as well.

>you need trigonometry for chemistry
no, you don't

Yes, you do.
prezi.com/jji4d4d5maul/trigonometry-in-chemistry/

>only the keeper can defend
Says who? What's stopping your guys from just flying in front of the hoops? Also, what if someone else than the seeker catches the snitch? And in the end, why don't you just beat down their seeker while the ref isn't looking?

Nah its considered one of the best literature series ever at least in terms of immersiveness and entertainment. Not talking about the movies btw, they are trash for normies who can't read.

Do you have a link to this english gentleman?

To be honest book 6 is pretty good if you look away from teen love and angst. Too bad the movie went full into the love angst and less on Voldemort’s background, which, say what you will about a 1 dimensional wizard hitler, was pretty neat. Murder splitting your soul sounds retarded though.

>listening audio books
>for a series that was written for children
Just get the book incels. Reminder I finished the whole series before I was 13 so a full grown adult must not have a problem with it.

As a person who’s usually frustrated with the people on my team I think the seeker and snitch is cool. Like you can end the game whenever you want on your own terms

>hot 5th graders want to sex
>end game in first 50 seconds and go have a ffffm 5some

>losing because your team fucking sucks and the other seeker is waiting because he wants to ridicule your team/sucks and you just catch the snitch and end the game on your own terms, be it for the win or lose it’s a fuck you I’m above you to the rest of the players

who thought it was a good idea to have two iron balls zooming around the field to knock children (who themselves are flying fast) off their brooms?

Its explicitely stated that only the seeker can grab the snitch and get points and the finish from it. I'm sure there is nothing stopping you from just hanging around in front of the goals, but this probably doesnt happen for the same reason it doesnt in actual sports, because its not actually good defensive play. Tge bludgers can in fact beat the seeker if the ref isnt looking, which actually happened in one of the books, though that ref was paid off, it shows that its fair play if its not caught.

No one past there teenage years should sit and read the series, and its unnecessary anyway as the prose is nothing special. I wish I could find the audio for the book, but it had this case and I'm pretty sure was the first recording of the series.

youtu.be/FzkKwLoq9ns

There’s only one locker and you all get in it?

>prose
You dont read harry potter for the prose retard. If you are an adult you can get through the first book in like 3-4 days.

the first book is a few hours but goblet was the chungus

Or you can listen to it in four hours, beautifully read by a native brit with a whimsical transition for every chapter.

The first is just extremely bare. I dont actually find myself enjoying the act of reading the series until the third book.

>It takes several hours of play by the rest of the team in order to accomplish what one person can do in the first five minutes
>At that point you're literally incentivized to just play for days on end until you start winning and then arbitrarily end the game there
What a fantastic sport

> omg this thread is literally meeee

but I agree this bothered me instantly, looks like I wasnt missing some vital detail about the game and it is in fact a stupid shit game designed by a cancerous woman

absolutely based

this was so stupid i got up and walked out when it happened

In all fairness, the snitch was extremely difficult to catch and harry was only such a successful seeker because of a. Genetics b. Plot armor and c. Cutting edge broom technology. He literally had the best model every single year. All those games that lasted days are just as relevant, because lets be real, no one would actually be as good as HP naturally at any sport.

Without the Snitch it's fine, it just flying magical basketball where you can get smashed by a flying ball. It's pretty clear that she just didn't want to bother with having to write lengthy descriptions of Quidditch matches and try to elaborate on how team play works, so instead Harry's just off in his own world while everybody else actually plays the game

Walked out of the theater right then and there.

Fuck it

I've only read the first two books, has there ever actually been a situation like this?

>its considered one of the best literature series ever
Said literally no one ever.

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In the fourth book, the Quidditch World Cup ends like this. Bulgaria's Viktor Krum caught the stitch when his team was losing by more than 150 points, so Ireland ends up winning.

top of goodreads with a 4.8 score

ah yes, the most based man on Yea Forums has arrived

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>why yes i'm big fan of all harry potter movies. what gave it away?

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>if something is popular it’s good
The absolute state of this post

Why didn't Malfoy just break Harry's legs before every quidditch match? His father probably had the clout to let him get away with it. Dumbledore would have probably mirthfully waved it off too, preaching the importance of forgiveness and whatnot.

Did you notice Clifford the dog on the list? The list is bait.

Imagine if Nolan had full creative control of the films. Ahhh, if only.

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>most important position of the team
>give it to 2 first years, one of whom just flew for the first time a week ago
Rowling really is a hack, isn't she?

>goodreads
tranny moron detected

Broom technological developments ruined the game.
Don't forget that when Quidditch was invented brooms were slower and more cumbersome.
The Snitch used to be FAR harder to catch.

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>hagrid and harry are in the wizard market
>I’ll buy this cauldron Hagrid
>shopkeeper: it’s too heavy for you to carry, your friend will have to take it, it might be extremely painful for you to carry it
>Harry: he is a big guy
>shopkeeper: for you

When i get reminded of quidditch i always think how impossible scoring even one 'basket' would be and also how they let kids play it.

Based, my good sir

Not only kids, but they let girls play it.
Girls who have like 30% the upper body strength of men throwing basketballs through the air and batting bludgers.
Truly a female delusion.

Draco was a huge pussy.

I reckon there were loads of molestings at hogwarts because they could just magic away the memories dumbledor definitely fiddled with Ron’s penis

What kind of level of beta nosports do you have to be on to not be able to score against a goalie guarding three different goals at once, while not even having to think about using your feet to move the ball forward or dribbling etc? Just point the broom and throw, nigga.

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careful the fry defense force my get you they were on high alert yesterday

Seekerw would make sense if the snitch gave 50 points or so. 150 is just retarded and basically designed to make Harry into the star of each match.

Honestly it's surprising Harry didn't have girls falling all over him considering he was basically Chad during his time on school.

>rape girls in the locker
>obliviate them so they don't remember a thing
>repeat

How did Rowling get away with it?

Physically look like a twig with hair
>chad

>star athlete
>rich
>famous
>not Chad

The fact that it's nothing special in written form is exactly why you might as well just listen to an audio book instead. Just like crime novels or any fantasy that's not Tolkien, there just isn't any wording worth looking at twice or passages to re-read.

So the game ends when somebody catches the snitch right? So if your team is losing with more then 150 points your seeker is useless. if he catches the snitch the game is over and you would still lose. He can just sit on the pitch and jackoff, till his teammates score more goals

Sorry but that's like people saying its ok to download 700mb movie files and watch on your phone. Not the same experience sweatie.

Imagine if raimi was directing

>all niggers, jews and trannies will have to ride a different hogwarts express

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If it's some shit like the Resident Evil movies then yeah, you could. You're not going to miss out on anything. I can't believe you're being some autistic reading purist for fucking Harry Potter.

Ragging on audiobooks is pure gatekeeping

>If it's some shit like the Resident Evil movies then yeah, you could.
You CAN do it. But is it as good as watching a 4k blu ray on a 40 inch tv? Nope.

Deep.

No it's definitely as good, because there's fucking nothing about the visuals in the Resident Evil movies worth seeing on a big screen. All you need to see is the bangbanging of zombies. Also, who the fuck has a 40 inch tv these days?

>4k tv= reading
>400 mb file of phone= listening to audiobook

TSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

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And with some dreck there's no need to watch it on a 4k tv, or to have a fucking bluray of it. How is this concept so hard for you to understand?

>DRECK
its the highest rated fantasy series in existence zoomer

Only a zoomer would think Harry Potter is a book that needs to be read. Pro tip: it's not Ulysses.

>hurr durr ulysses
Nigger you cant understand ulysses unless you are a historian so PLEASE stop pretending you're not a pseud who last read a book in 2010.

Based deh posters

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based keriposter imposter

Keep digging your hole, brainlet autist.

...

Kek

>The fundamental difference is that the real-life players don't fly – instead, they run with a stick between their legs. Obviously. Don't be an idiot. The stick acts as a handicap in the same way that not running with the ball does in netball, or not being able to pick up the ball does in football. You can have up to 21 people per roster and seven players on the pitch: a keeper (goalie of sorts), three chasers (the ones who score the hoops and get the points), two beaters (the ones with bludgers who control the dodgeball side of the game) and the seeker (the one who chases the snitch). The snitch isn't a shiny gold ball with mechanical wings; it's a low-budget tennis ball in a yellow sock tucked into the back of the shorts of the "snitch runner".

>In the International Quidditch Association's rulebook, there's a huge section dedicated to explaining preferred pronouns and the terminology surrounding gender identity. Take the "four maximum gender" rule. Each team is allowed to have a maximum of four players (not including the seeker) who identify as the same gender in active play on the field. As a new sport, it's literally founded on the idea of being a safe, inclusive space. Every team I speak to tells me they have at least one trans player, as well as non-binary players and a range of sexualities. The team Taxes, whose players come from all across the country, is one of the most LGBT-friendly teams in the UK. "I'm genderfluid. I approached a trans player and we started this team together, which made a big difference to the vibe," explained 24-year-old Bex McLaughlin. "Our coach is also genderflux. Having non-binary people set up the team attracted more people who felt like that. We're coming from a team that often runs four genders. It's very diverse. We have to watch the gender rule for too many women, if anything."

vice.com/en_uk/article/bnpqk4/is-quidditch-the-first-ever-lgbtq-inclusive-game-to-change-sports-forever

:/

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Ok dude its a fact that ulysses is extremely hard to understand you dumb cunt because it contains a ton of references to the time when it was written. Sorry but you are a walking condom advertisement.

The point is that to understand Ulysses you'd HAVE to read it and work it out. Meanwhile you could understand the Harry Potter novels by having a deaf-mute monk describe it to you using charades, because it's so fucking simple, even for a young adult fantasy book.

I miss him

Nice slideshow faggot

They did constantly its just no one dared walking up to him whatchu mean bruv. Hes like the Neo of their world

Ok well whatever nigger enjoy 'reading' a book while being outside and getting distracted by 50000000 things.

Having autism coupled with ADD must be a real curse.

>have brooms capable of flying
>let's throw and catch some balls around lmao

it would be like x-games people doing tricks and shit, proximity flying and whatnot.

Why do trannys have to ruin literally everything?

>Bulgaria's Viktor Krum caught the stitch when his team was losing by more than 150 points
That's absolutely fucking retarded. If he knew they were going to lose, he shouldn't have fucking caught it. In that situation anyone with common sense would wait, trying to block the opposing seeker from catching the snitch until the team had scored enough points to close the 150 point gap. What a load of fucking bullshit.

He didn't have any faith in his team catching up because they were being humiliated on the field by a clearly superior team. And so he ended the humiliation instead of drag it out.

She really fucked up quidditch. There are so many different ways she could have written the rules to make seekers and snitches actually make sense, but no. We got this bullshit.

>Hogwarts is far superior to any education system in the world.

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All that homeschooling is why pureblood wizard families are fucking retarded and why the ones growing up as muggles excel even when they're lazy gits like Harry. Because they're already used to school and not having your retarded parents teach you what little they can.

That actually makes sense. Buff snitch plz

>The snitch isn't a shiny gold ball with mechanical wings; it's a low-budget tennis ball in a yellow sock tucked into the back of the shorts of the "snitch runner".

>win the game by grabbing someone's ass

What if the opponent is at 151, in that case catching the tiny ball doesn't matter.

The writing is pretty crisp and clever for a children's series. Her world building is even good for the scope of the story. She's just a woman so logical thinking fucks things up now and then.

Someone post the superman one

The way to make wizard sports balanced is by letting each team or each player have a limited amount of spells per round, so they have to use strategy to make it count. The best sport would probably be wizard NASCAR with maybe 3 spells per lap and no attacking the cars directly (eg you can't turn it into a car, but you can have a bolder falling on top of it). Instead you'd have to cast spells on the track or in front of your opponent's cars, and they'd have to respond accordingly. See, the people in front would be at a disadvantage because while everyone behind them has 3 spells each to burn aggressively, the ones in front have to save their spells for important defensive measures.

There are games in the books where the team that catches the snitch still loses because they suck ass

so basically Mario Kart?

How’s the weather in reddit this time of year, tourist?

You got it! But with magic and more balanced.

Na. People like rowling's voice. And I don't mean her literal one, I mean her literary one.

The bible is still #1 zoomer

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Legendary and based

Bible is non fiction you filthy pagan.

>trinitarian calling people pagans
ironic

>Hogwitz

this
you can seethe about his lack of faith but i commend him for making the hard call and putting them out of their misery

no it's not

dullest franchise posting is such an amazing newfag filter

>3 spells per lap
>No!
It really should be 3 spells per pit stop, creating more strategy during the beginning and middle of the race, in case there is a long stretch of green flag racing. It also puts a premium on track position since you could be a backmarker and pit consistently to gain spells, but you'd also be getting lapped by the other racers since you chose to come into the pits for your 3 spells. Towards the end of the race in the closing laps, if the racing has been relatively incident free, the strategy of holding onto your spells would maximize chances of victory for someone running near the front, or should there be an overtime finish where people come in to the pits, all hell would break loose since everyone would come in to gain their three spells, knowing well and good that everyone else has them and the finish would be extremely chaotic.

What's your problem dude

It was fun
~IN MEMORIAM~
Harry Potter never survived his first flight with his Firebolt

>school of magic
>implying they don't just magically beam basic knowledge into the pupil's heads
come on user

Kinda this but you're still a dumb nigger, it's a parody of cricket, the name even sounds similar, and cricket also has weird ass rules.
Just like the magic money is a parody on pre-decimalization british pounds where it was 12 pence to a shilling, and 20 shillings to a pound, or 240 pence to a pound.

>Home schooling in real life generally doesn't work that well.
Nice meme. Home schooled kids do better in life by every metric.

There are still limitations to magic for example you cant conjure food so you can not just be a neet you have to work for a living.

Sounds good to me! Let's do it.

based

>audio books
unless it's a sultry female voice, fuck that

Well, it was invented by a woman.

fair enough but you can use magic to do all the manual work for growing food or keeping livestock

There are limited spells you cant just create new spells for particular things

And what hippy mommyblog did you read that on, weirdo?

>clifford for president
absolutely BASED my good sir

>you cant just create new spells
Snape came up with his emo cutter spell while he was still a schoolkid. You could totally make up some new shit.

>atlas shrugged god tier
>ulysses not utter dogshit tier
>hamlet low tier
clifford for president is good though

why not? someone has to create the spells, they don't just fall from the sky.
also there's certainly spells to move shit around, so as to plow the fields, sow seeds, water the plants, all that kind of stuff.

ACCIO PROOF FOR THE EXISTENCE OF THE HOLOCAUST
*waits a moment*
Well, well, well. Nothing showed up.

Kek based

>Dumbledore would have probably mirthfully waved it off too
Only if Draco's the one getting his legs broke
>It's my mercy and not yours that's important here

not an argument, on top of being highly problematic

made me grin for the sheer absurdity of dumblydore choosing ron of all the potential candidates for seeing him procure a white flag at the end of his wand. ron is a fucking loser

harry never had the chad mentality and they all knew it

underrated

wasn't the 4th book like a 1,000 page cluster fuck of trying to unfuck some plot hole

what's to prevent someone from pocketing the snitch?

I've seen some variations on the tier list though this one is old

Did you think molesters went for the popular kids, or what? They prey on the losers and shy kids all the time.

he's a slitherin I bet he'd even earn points for doing it

harry was a beta male and rowling has no fucking clue how anything works.

do you know she has a penis canon and has charted out the size of every wizard's penis since women know about that kind of thing

>I voted Trum-
>CRUCIO!

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Shit, imagine Trump trying to slur his way through some spells, using the wrong words and then pretending he meant to use them all along and that it's a great new spell he's invented.

*Hagrid standing in the powerstance*
>Mr. Potter, I am Hogwarts

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When I was a kid there was some deep lore book I picked up because it was just a book on mythical creatures through the HP lens. It had an anecdote about how the earliest days of broom soccer there was no seeker and the whole team including goalies would just go for the ball because thats what mattered. Also about a betting scandal where mind control was used to rig a game such that team X would catch it but be so far behind team Y won.

TDS

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>reeee don't make an easy joke about my heroooooo

>goodreads

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>genderflux
>genderfluid
Wtf is the difference

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>unironic fan of turnleft makes sensible post
wew

But after book 3 the stories became a completely boring clusterfuck of stupid and plotholes. Those must be the worst ghostwriters ever.

Everyone was afraid of Harry most of the time, they thought he was the wizard equivalent of a school shooter

>use love potions to fuck every Stacy in school

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unironically based

Gary Stu, plot armor, etc.

The first two books were completely based around world-building (how well she did is another thread entirely), and from book 3 on was about expanding upon the story of Harry as he ages and is exposed to more and more of the darker side of magic and corruption. This climaxes at the rebirth of Voldemort in the graveyard in Goblet. From that point forward, the entire story shifts from being quirky and fun with goofy magic kiddy shit and makes Harry and the crew grow the fuck up pretty damn quick since they know there is a real threat out there, and trying to get people to join in on the fight. The overall story arc took a dramatic shift and the writing followed suit. Also, it could be chalked up to experience or just getting to tell the story that the first couple books started to slowly touch on while building the world it was to be set in.

It was a fake fantasy sport invented by a woman who literally knew nothing about sports outside of "ball goes in goal" so she cobbled together some nonsensical rules that allowed Harry to be the hero every time

mad

She knew about sports. She hated them. She stuck them in there haphazardly to show off Harry's skill knowing full well and good that she never actually tried to create a game that made sense. It was basically a troll job on her part but still got the point across that Harry was a magical Chad.

Is Tom Bombadillo favorite book tho

Yes, you seem quite mad. Maybe Yea Forums isn't the site for you if you can't handle making fun of Presidents, peaches.

the score in quidditch can only go up in the increments of 10 you oblivious nigger

Tom Bombadillo like the building

Tom Bombadillo thought is fun

kill yourself, glue-eater

It was an interesting idea that really resonated with kids, getting pulled out of your home to visit a FUN school away from your abusive parents. If she can come up with a solid idea like that, one that really speaks to hearts of children, why would you expect that it's the only one she can come up with?

>Also literally the pay2win position because the best and fastest brooms are obviously the most important tools to have for catching the snitch
But user, don't you see, Harry being the bestest Seeker in all of Hogwarts' history with his piece of shit broom PROVES that it isn't P2W!
Just like that one Quidditch match proved that Seeker wasn't the specialest and most importantest position because Bulgaria lost even though they caught the snitch.
In case it isn't apparent, I'm being facetious. Quidditch is a fucking clusterfuck of a sport, and Seeker only exists as a position to put Harry on a pedestal.

>You think magic is your friend, Harry Potter?
>I was born in it, molded by it.
>I didn't see muggle civilization until I was a man. And it confused me.
>Magic is my ally.

>immersive
Neck yourself, that's my biggest pet peeve about this children's book.
Try to figure out how the magic system works, try to find out what the fuck is so good about the meme death spell. Oh you can't? That's because the 200 IQ writer just said "oh lmao i couldn't give less of a shit if my series is immersive or not".

tl;dr

>If she can come up with a solid idea like that
It's just a generic isekai user.

i've never listened to the steven fry version, but jim dale is just so good that I can't imagine anyone dethroning him.

Krum kept getting the irish seeker to slam into the ground making him a complete non-entity in the game. All the chechen team had to do was score one or two goals. But they blew it

if you think cricket has weird rules then you have to be a fucking 20iq bonobo retard

Quidditch could be saved quite easily if the game didn't end with the snitch being caught, as others have pointed out it completely fucks the game up. If your team is behind it completely destroys any incentive for the seeker to catch the snitch. Make it so it runs on a clock and each catch is just 50 points or something.

>Broom technological development
Cute idea but how does it fit into the world building? Brooms are not technology.

>Brooms are not technology

Everyone that's not Anglo or got buttfucked into liking it like the Indians think Cricket is a laughable game, you limey cocksucker.

Didn't Rowling state that the point of the game was to dab on people who liked sports by making it as retarded as possible?

We literally see the brooms get better more than once, AND we get the poorfags always complaining about how bad their old brooms are because they're not flying straight and they're slow and they're shaking etc etc.

that doesnt mean it isnt incredibly simple

The concept of a broom hasn't changed since its inception. Vacuum cleaners are technology. A bit of wood with some straws at the end is not.

>plot is based around a prophecy
You knew from the start it was written by a hack.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Broom
>In 1797, the quality of brooms changed when Levi Dickenson, a farmer in Hadley, Massachusetts, made a broom for his wife, using the tassels of sorghum, a grain he was growing for the seeds. His wife spread good words around town, creating demand for Dickenson's sorghum brooms. The sorghum brooms held up well, but ultimately, like all brooms, fell apart. Dickenson subsequently invented a machine that would make better brooms, and faster than he could. In 1810, the foot treadle broom machine was invented. This machine played an integral part in the Industrial Revolution.[4]
Brooms helped sweep the stage clean for the industrial revolution to get going on. That's technology for you.

Kys incel

>The game ends when the Snitch is caught or an agreement is reached between the captains of both teams.
what the fuck does that even mean

t. Potter Forums Mod

The Art of the Deal

Nobody wants a game to go on for months because the seekers are useless gits.

Yeah, and you can get a bitching broom for less than 5 bucks now. So what the fuck are the top racing models made of?

You are fucking retarded. You are among the faggots in online games that never forfeit because you are stupid fucking idiots with a trash self-value. I fucking hate you troglodytes so much I 'm responding to a 5 hour old post.
Fuck you.

Better vroom vroom magic, better faggots.

Rarer materials, straw, core. Maybe infused with newer magic or more difficult magic. Better aerodynamics etc. This isn't canon, just stuff I made up just now. Do you literally have zero imagination or fantasy?

>none of this is even touched upon
>just make up your own explanation lol
In other words, Rowling is shit at world building.

1 in sucking maybe

Of course because magic isn’t real you dumb nazi

>"This state-of-the-art racing broom sports a streamlined superfine handle of ash, treated with a diamond-hard polish and hand-numbered with its own registration number. Each individually selected birch twig in the broomtail has been honed to aerodynamic perfection, giving the Firebolt unsurpassable balance and pinpoint precision. The firebolt has an acceleration of 150 miles an hour in ten seconds and incorporates an unbreakable Braking Charm. Price on request."
harrypotter.fandom.com/wiki/Firebolt
+1 magic enchantments all around.

"no!"

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I never saw the problem with this. It's a two-layer game: You have the consistent slower point-gain through normal play and the explosive more random victory condition of catching the snitch. I do agree the game would be better if any number of player could choose to chase and catch the snitch as opposed to just the Seeker. This way you'd get a cool balance that each team would have to make, maybe even dynamically throughout the game, about deciding between consistent slow point-gain and better it all for the chance to win.

but you can transform things into food, le equivalent exchange style.

I was always bummed out that they never delve into exactly how spells come to be. On one hand they claim magic isn't a do-whatever, there are spells that you can learn and need to master to use, but on the other hand new spells come to be somehow.

electric field theory vs navier-stokes equations.

The game doesn't end until the snitch is caught. There have been times mentioned in the book where a team has landed so many goals, that even when the enemy caught the snitch, they still lost because they were so far behind.

>transform stone into biscuit and eat it
>an hour later your shitty charm stops working
>now you've got gravel filling your belly
It probably wouldn't even have any nutritional value either even if you did cast a spell strong enough to keep it a biscuit until you shit it all out. Rowling made it clear that you can only "conjure" food by moving it from a place you know it exists at. That's why the house elves cook all that food before magicking it upstairs to feed the kids.

>soccer game
>separate to the regular game there are two dudes cluelessly running around
>if they find a certain pebble the game immediately ends and they earn their team 10 points

Man that would surely make for a fun match to watch.

They should make it so that the game has a clock and the seeker is just another chaser who will peel off and chase after the snitch when it appears.

Still garbage, boring, unfunny, hack without talent learn how to write good pastas.

A real sport would have that the first team to # of points wins, or that there are # of rounds or whatever. So that even if you catch the snitch, which can be a one-time event, the enemy still has a chance to catch up. But the entire sport is structured so Harry has a special role on the team and that there is dramatic flair for when he does his job so the scene can end instead of, "Harry caught the Snitch!!! We still have twenty minutes left on the clock!'.

Wait, some literal sheep saw it enough times so now they convinced themselves that it's good and they like it.

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Books 5-7 are terrible. 3 and 4 are the "best" if that can even be applied to Harry Potter as an adult.

That's a big locker

12/10 solely for Clifford

It's a cool concept. The idea of planting yourself in the world and raping a qt innocent Hufflepuff girl is enticing.

>All muggleborns and kids without wizard parents only have a primary school education.
>They don't learn any English, Maths, Science, etc. after they turn 11.

That's better than the kids with wizard parents who just get told how to vanish their poop.

>eric.ed.gov/?id=EJ893891
>usnews.com/education/high-schools/articles/2012/06/01/home-schooled-teens-ripe-for-collegeMore than 2 million U.S. students in grades K-12 were home-schooled in 2010, accounting for nearly 4 percent of all school-aged children, according to the National Home Education Research Institute. Studies suggest that those who go on to college will outperform their peers.
>Students coming from a home school graduated college at a higher rate than their peers—66.7 percent compared to 57.5 percent—and earned higher grade point averages along the way, according to a study that compared students at one doctoral university from 2004-2009.
>They're also better socialized than most high school students, says Joe Kelly, an author and parenting expert who home-schooled his twin daughters.
>"I know that sounds counterintuitive because they're not around dozens or hundreds of other kids every day, but I would argue that's why they're better socialized," Kelly says. "Many home-schoolers play on athletic teams, but they're also interactive with students of different ages."
It's literally not even a fucking contest. Homeschooled kids blow public schooled kids out of the water. Even private schooled kids frequently get btfo by them. Every statistic backs this assertion. Most niggas just cling to the myth that it's bad in other ways other than academics out of desperation to convince themselves they aren't fuckups as parents.
Pic related, this family had all 7 of their kids go straight to university BY THE AGE OF 12.
>by every metric
Including socializing. Yeah that shit surprised me too.

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>can't create new spells
Snape did. You can make up new spells its probably just difficult. That or J.K. is a lazy writer. Not that good writing matters when you make books for kids.

If you're losing by more than 15 goals you're fucked already anyway m8. Might as well end it before it's 300 - 0

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Dehest dehs deh dehe dehy deh dehie dehs. Deh deh dehing deh deh dehard deh deh dehs deh Dehwarts Dehdemy deh dehey deh dehed dehs deh deh indehable deh deh dehs. Deh deh deh dehy dehery, deh dehs’ deh dehency deh deh dehs deh deh dehment deh indehive deh deh dehial dehs, deh deh deh dehic undehical, deh deh dehtion deh indeh.

Dehs deh deh deh deh deh Dehling dehed deh deh deh Dehlberg dehing deh dehs; deh deh deh deh dehs deh deher deh dehen deh deh deh deh deh deh deht dehthing deh dehbody?deh dehusly dehable deh-dehtion deh deh dehs. Deh Dehry Dehher dehs deh deh anti-Dehtian (deh deh), deh deh’s dehly deh anti-Dehes Dehnd dehs deh dehs deh deh deh, dehty deh dehment. Deh deh dehs deh deh deh deh. Deh, dehfully, deh deh deher deh deh.

>d-deh dehst deh dehs deh deh dehough d-deh
"Deh!"
Deh dehing deh dehful; deh deh deh dehble. Deh deh deh, Deh dehed deh dehry deh deh deher deh deh deh deh, deh dehor deh dehtead deh deh deher "dehed deh dehs."

Deh deh dehing deh deh deh deh deh deh dehry deh deh deh deh dehed. Deh dehed deh deh Deh deh dehed deh deh dehal deh dehs. Deh deh dehlous. Dehling's deh dehs deh dehed deh dehes deh deh dehs deh deh deh deh deh deh deh dehing. Deh Deh deh deh dehish, dehing deh deh Dehry Dehher deh deh deh Dehphen Dehng. Deh deh dehthing deh deh dehect deh, "Deh dehse dehs deh dehing Dehry Dehher deh dehdeh deh dehdeh, deh deh deh deh deher deh deh deh deh deh deh Dehphen Dehng." Deh deh deh deh dehght. Deh deh deh dehing dehic. Deh deh deh "Dehry Dehher" deh deh, deh deh, dehed deh deh Dehphen Dehng.

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>Studies suggest that those who go on to college
>those who go on to college
Gee, I wonder why they make that qualifier. Nothing about the percentages of them going to college compared to regular kids, just how they do marginally better at actually finishing college. Probably because they're so fucking happy to finally be away from their overprotective cult parents filling their heads with drivel 24/7.
>says the guy who home-schooled his own kids
What an extraordinarily objective voice.

For every one home-schooling success story there's one family like the one I know, who just have "lessons" on what a chosen bible passage means and how to use it in your everyday life.

>plebs aren't burdened with trig they'll never use again in their lives
found the pleb who doesn't use trig anymore

IIRC Quidditch is also a game that can canonically last for days so better do that before there are any health risks

What

Making soccer more enjoyable to watch is a low bar.

Dumb christcuck shit like denying evolution doesn't change the statistics. Don't like it feel free to go look at any other statistics you want. They're so universally lopsided in favor of homeschooling I guarantee you'll be searching for a while.
I was not home schooled. My ass was super fucking skeptical of this shit and I had all the same assumptions but man you can't argue with results. Don't like it just cut the insane boomer christcuck shit like denying evolution or insisting the universe is only a few thousand years old.

That was exactly my point, dumb dumb.

Transfiguration isn't temporary in HP in that sense, it'd be permanent.

On the topic of food, we can just refer to the source material: "Your mother [Molly Weasley] can’t produce food out of thin air, no one can. Food is the first of the five Principal Exceptions to Gamp’s Law of Elemental Transfigura[tion]... It’s impossible to make good food out of nothing! You can Summon it if you know where it is, you can transform it, you can increase the quantity if you’ve already got some..."

You can just increase the quantity of food once you have like one bread and live off that until it goes stale, then just find another. Plus you can conjure water or even wine out of thin air, without requiring anything, they're an exception to that law. Being a magician makes it pretty easy to survive.

This isn't my pill doc

The worst thing about this image is BNW being so low

But Harry always had the best broom (except in 2nd year, where he had the 2nd best broom on the market).
The Nimbus 2000 and the Firebolt were literally the best broomsticks money could buy - professional players would use them.

Dehlightfully Dehvilish

>"You know, Harry, with great power comes great responsibility. Grindewald called it "the Pure Blood's Burden." Myself, I just call it as I see it: the reaponsibility of the wizard to discipline the muggle."
>Sirius looks directly at the camera.
>"The mudbloods, the goblins, the squibs...It's our responsibility to civilize them. And if we can't? Then they shall dangle from the Whomping Willow. The Day of the Wand is near, Harry. We'll have every muggle in this country dead or in chains in 10 years, and may Merlin have me shot by my edgy relatives and dramatically fall through a veil to the afterlife this very night if I'm wrong. Merlin bless the UK Independence Party."

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>An unbreakable braking charm
But not an unbreakable unbreakable charm?

>clifford for president
i kek every time

>all homeschooling is done by crazy religious parents!
Maybe if you were properly schooled you wouldn't have your opinion on a topic you know nothing about be solely determined by the popular stereotypes about it and not data.

The dullest franchise copypasta is the best newfag filter in the history of this board

Welcome new friend

How did a Dementor attack Harry on the hippogryph? Can they fly that fast?

>Including socializing. Yeah that shit surprised me too.
by "surprises" you mean it fails the fucking sniff test. Would it "surprise" you to find out that snow is hot?

He's not on a hippogrif there.

That's right, he's on a fast broom. Same question applies.

You are a colossal brainlet kek.

>t. chemist

Cut that shit out dawg. Its fucking embarassing, and not even funny.

Yes. All the boys take turns raping the poorest performing member in their locker, while the girls do the same in their locker.

This is like GRRM and taxes. Dod he ever explain that little tree fags tax and welfare policy for the kingdom? It doesnt fucking matter as long as it maintains thematic gravity. Avada Kedavra could literally teleport shit into your pumping heart and it wouldnt matter in the stories context, all that matters is you die instantly.

They put fucking unicorn heart strings and ground dragon teeth in their wands. What crazy shit do you think goes into a Firebolt? Its magic technology user, dont be stupid.

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Thanks that explains it perfectly

The rules of this game were made specifically so Harry could be LE SPECIAL GARY STU WHO SINGLEHANDEDLY WINS

Ur all fuckin virgins lmao

youtube.com/watch?v=pDyXZuvMaFc

Canonically killing a unicorn was one of the most heinous crimes imaginable, makes one wonder where they get unicorn heart strings from and why the usage of them isn't frowned upon.

>seething pottermore mod