/heem/ - itadakimasu edition

just messin with NPCs

post rocket-fuel jiri

textbook pile driver

it's just a high angle mat return

>A thinker sees his own actions as experiments and questions--as attempts to find out something.
>Success and failure are for him answers above all

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instagram.com/p/Cb0LH7OgNXJ/

Stankobros... still creaming my jock over this one

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bjj guys just want all slams illegal, hence hardy whining

i want to see aljamain die in the octagon

lil harsh b

seethe

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dan hardy's not a bjj guy, idk what his problem is with it tbqh he's probably just trying to sound smart

he’s natty

I thought that's how they marketed him leading up to the GSP fight? I'm probably misremembering.

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bros i dont wanna lose my virginity

hardy's a striker b

Yeah I don't know who I'm thinking of, he's only got 2 subs. Gonna take a break from /heem/ for a minute.

dw about it lad

>kneed in the head
>acts better when unconscious
how?

What would a Burns victory look like?

Khamzat fucks up the weight cut and Burns lands a good punch idk

how do you "fuck up" a weight cut?

shitsplat drops him and is gnping and somehow giblet snatches an arm or locks in a triangle

there’s no coming back from that

>that amount of tuna
>no chili mayo
dropped

Does he even have any subs in the ufc?

Attached: nochinho push up.webm (1280x720, 2.24M)

Will Kris Moutinho manage to reach the highest levels of CTE of all time?

another mmatard doing meme shit, why is it always mma guys

this lil nigga must have the strongest elbows this world has ever seen

>"Much has been made about the boxing of Petr-- Oh! Big knee splits the guard! Early knockdown for the champ!"
>"He's on his back!"
>"Petr Yan potentially in a world of trouble here!"
>"He needs to get the hooks in if he wants to finish this choke"
>"Ooh, big shots from back control!"
>"He got it! That's under the chin!"
>"Potentially the beginning of the end here..."
>"Oh, he's gonna go to sleep. Yan's gonna go to sleep."
>"HE'S OUT!"
>"THAT IS IT! ALJAMAIN STERLING SILENCES ALL CRITICS TONIGHT!"

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I like the way he dabs on Marlon.

Why doesn't anyone tell him he's doing it wrong

Sasuga, Aljo-sama

i hate npc's so fucking much
kill yourselves

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give it to me straight, bros?
am i gonna live long enough to see Pyotr regain the belt from the false samurai, Aljo-san?

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i had covid without even knowing. bitchmade germ didn't stand a chance against a thoroughbred like me

People like this need to be beaten up or hes gonna end up as a school shooter

Based Jiri

>coofposting in 2022

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*takes you into deep waters*

Oh shit senpai, are you gonna need a loan to pay off the test

would love to bully that retard

*heems you and the water dries up*

i have mild symptoms, mostly just a sore throat
i was able to afford the $30 co-pay, alhamdulillah

aljo bomaye
aljo bomaye

This is the kind of retard that is into lookism and spends his time talking about canthal tilts, IPD and that sort of shit.

Is this guy a heemer?
youtube.com/watch?v=UwL6eA_fH3E

>ukraine
>dan hooker
>dookie dan
>ukie dookie

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What are you seeing in class?

Inshallah brother

how do u know it's reddit

Cause it says Reddit in the top left tard

seems legid

>another terrible lineup from the mmajewhour

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oh to be rich enough to eat pricy sushi every night...

you would only know that if you are a faggot redditor

I read it off the screen
Do you have eyes?
Look at his laptop in the picture.

Couldn' even read it. Go back

Aljo's already broken. You can't break a buck twice

phil davis > jan blachowicz

Holy cope
Go back

Just realized Conor will come back with a even more boxing focused style after the leg injury. Probably will get knocked out like the Poirier fight

hopefully

too many d*gestinkies gotta start suzzin on em

There's no say Aljo wins right. I know it would be funny, it's just Yan is way too good.

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You could have just said
>I used to use it so I recognize the interface
I used to get workout plans from there. I still use a shoulder warm up I got from there. Don't be ashamed.

>take a picture of some faggot using reddit
>this means I use reddit
Kill yourself stupid faggot.

i wonder if shes got any takers

Only if you eat the horse paste

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Aljo will win round 1 RNC

I think if nobody saw it coming Aljo could win but since everyone is meming it it's not gonna happen. The element of surprise is gone.

homie fucked up by doing the greentext story of aljo winning. long greentext predictions are a curse.

Khamzat is a Mortal Kombat chad

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is /heem/ boying Danny Gay whilst his stock is low considering he's just been taken under Wittman's wing?

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Nah, I've liked Danny gay for a while, he's a banger but he's not boy material.

Sanko is such a hoe

It's an illegal slam, Aljo wins the rematch, point deduction for every minor foul, Petr Yan is unhinged

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twitter.com/420mangere/status/1510730240703692800
did he know?

Based Poland dabbing on Russia and accepting BBC into his mouth and ass.

What are you a high schooler?

>how can he slam?!?!

Attached: incredulous.png (2518x1518, 3.24M)

Community College muh fren

Whats ur degree?

anger levels rising

No cap?

Khamzat is a Based Strategy games enjoyer

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Paralegal graduating in May doggy

[Verse 1: TWOODLEY]
Beat your ass in real life, beat your ass on TV (Nigga)
I'll beat your ass with some beef shit, beat your ass on GB
Pull up on that slick tip, niggas run when they see me
Now your eyes fuckin' poppin' out, you seein' shit in 3D
Beat your head to the white meat (Bow), knock out all your white teeth (Gone)
One fruit punch on your shirt for niggas thinkin' that I'm sweet (Uh-uh)
Walls loaded with concrete (Yup), fingertips with Nyquil
Quick to put a nigga right to sleep (Uh-uh), he lookin' like he might scream (Oh)
Hands on that, H-O-D (H-O-D)
When I'm in this octagon, I'm G-O-D (G-O-D)
Get that ass beat live on TV (On TV)
Nigga layin' out, glad it won't be me (Uh-uh)

[Chorus: T-Dubb-O & Wiz Khalifa]
I'll beat your ass (Yeah)
I'll beat your ass (Yeah)
I'll beat your ass (Yeah)
I'll beat your ass (Yeah)
I'll beat 'em, on God, though (Yeah)
Talk slick, move quick like a macho (Uh)
Where have you, huh? Back with my eyes closed (What? Wow)
You can't fuck with me, yeah, I know (Yeah, look, I'll)
Beat your ass (Yeah)
I'll beat your ass (Yeah)
I'll beat your ass (Beat your ass, uh)
I'll beat your ass (Beat your ass, yeah)
I'll beat 'em, on God, though (Yeah)
Talk slick, move quick like a macho (Yeah)
Where have you, huh? Back with my eyes closed (Uh)
You can't fuck with me, yeah, I know (Yeah, look, I'll)

>doesn't name them
clash of clans caz bitch

Yes, yes, but does Khamzat play league of legends?

Which male fighter do you think cries the most out of all the UFC?

yes, he's a Gwen main

paul craig easily

>Gwen main
Into the trash

Gilbert Burns
Retard.

Khalil round3

Jerked off while my girl ate my asshole last night. 11/10 even better than imagined

Khamzat is a zoomer Russian, he for sure plays Age of Empires and Warcraft 3.

gil does not cry outside the cage

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>we're all gonna make it

>One fruit punch on your shirt for niggas thinkin' that I'm sweet
warm fruit punch on your shirt, fuck niggas thinking that i'm sweet
>Walls loaded with concrete
palms loaded with concrete
>he lookin' like he might scream
if he looking like he might squeal
>Hands on that
hands on deck
>Nigga layin' out, glad it won't be me
nigga laying out flat, won't be me
>move quick like a macho
move quick like a vato
>Where have you, huh? Back with my eyes closed
one hand behind my back with my eyes closed
had to correct the record. twoods biggest fan here

dustin

Gus. Hands down.

>tfw Khamzat makes Gilly Beans cry again

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> he thinks that's a slam

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Doubt it. Gus does not have emotions. Not saying that's a good thing.

man... what happened to Marlon? He used to be a HEEMer.

dusty

anyone else fed up of all the dagestani slurpers in /heem/ nowadays

B O G
O
G

name 1

aaagh

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The heemer became the heemed or the heemee rather.

You can't run anymore Aljo

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gilly beans is never catching on my man

khamzat is chechen

That's the only way to defeat the BVLL.

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couldnt heem cepoodo in the first, was all downhill from there

Aaaagghh

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theem nutty

>tfw no one will care about Gilly Beans after Khamzat wins

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based SATURNALIA enjoyed
Also he looks even more asian now lmao

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I hope Yan wins and for his cage interview he says nothing and just holds up a Z hand sign like zoltan.

Some user asked last thread if this is illegal because is a pile drive.
Is not illegal, throws and slams need to have an arch.
Although is subtle when Yan lift aljo and throws him on his head head, he doesn't just lift him up flip him and drive him down in a straight line like for example the Andrade slam on Rose, supposedly that throw on Rose wasn't ilegal because Rose was holding to a kimura but that's the for of a pile drive where the slam is a line straight down.
This one yan throws Aljo to the side, i don't even think is a pile drive, is a normal slam and didn't even fully land on Aljo's head.

Yan via legal knee.

What if Yan does an illegal knee on purpose and retires?

Is a cheeky bet on Aljo at +315 good value?

Yan isn't a Putincel

Even better

who is this bogged monstrum?

>no SOVLpatch
What an empty husk

Aljo's gonna get finished this time. Yan knows Sterling is easy to take down now. He basically just fucked with him last fight, the only reason Aljo looked decent early is because Yan started slow. I feel like on the flipside, Aljo is gonna pace himself thinking that was his only issue last fight, which will just lead to him being more stationary and easier to hit.

he's swedish so han sitter har i venten och spelar lite dota

Best HW in UFC history enters the thread
youtube.com/watch?v=yjhdLw14drM&t=4s

Yan couldn't finish Sandhagen.

How would she do in the ufc?

Virgin mary

NEW

yan's is probably more effective to actually damage his opponent.

He's back.

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>2 days old

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>new
>is actually about to die
What did the boxcel mean by this?

rent free

Sandhagen isn't a heartlet like Aljo, and he's got better TDD than Aljo.

>(Sat)

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do you think he finished that all by himself

>isn't a heartlet
>better TDD
>literally got taken down by Aljo and tapped
Wdhmbt?

> mma math

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Burns only hope is that it turns out that Khamzat is a chinlet and goes down with the first good punch Burns lands.

his beautiful nihon waifu (taking the picture) helped

I've eaten that much sushi in one sitting and I'm 6' 175. He could definitely finish that.

>czech-jap hybrid
Grim

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I've decided I'm going to start training and get into the UFC. I'm going to be roid my ass off and be a 5'10 welterweight version of Paulo Costa and only spam body kicks and hooks inside the pocket.

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Fake

He'll kill Garth and reclaim the lightweight title.

Based.

if he was a chinlet till would've heemed him in training instead of becoming his wife

Not impressed.

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I think Burns can do it, you're talking about him like he were some bum, the guy is legit

>5'10
>welterweight
lol

>knocked out by THE Dan Hooker
But yeah I agree he could get that lucky punch.

costa is 6'0 and a middleweight so a 5'10 welterweight is bmi proportional

careful b it only works if you have a retarded chin

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fuck him hope aljo heems him

chudbros this can't be real...

I think the bigger problem is that you can't fight and would go down from the first sucker punch a nog threw at you. If you haven't survived a nog sucker punch and won the fight you aren't a real one.

yes, ukraine and russia are one :)

khamzat took a lot of good punches when he was an early rookie, they never phased him at all.
he looks fine here though, definitely an evilchad
this would unironically be a great jaw to avoid heems

all i hear is a jealous hater b

>bmi

>weight to height ratio doesn't exist

Idk I've eaten sucker punches from nogs in the hood and still won while 90% of wh*tes(even so called tough guys) go down with one sucker punch.

>ngmi

who is the boz of mma

My big dick.

Dana Pink

youtube.com/watch?v=I3Bi8P-YxZM
yanbros...

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>embedded

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grazie italia, i didnt know it was up

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>pull out phone
>open heem.org
>it's actually /box/

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>30

could max beat whoever the best 145lb boxer is

Yan has 0 good wins

actual new

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early

in MMA yes

the really sad thing about will smith and chris rock is that they used to be friends

sad thing is you still talking about it, they don't know u faggot

HOLY COPE
go back cazzie

That's a pretty good point. They still have Polanski in the Academy.

I don't know if I've had it but I'll assume I haven't since I chain smoke 24/7 and would therefore probably get heemed by covid

ali got yans password?

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>Why yes, I do watch embedded.

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i look like that and say that

probably not... but he would put up a good fight, and he wouldn't get knocked out that's for sure.

literally finna watch the cringebedded right now just to spite you poof

let me know if someone gets a heckin haircut will ya!

i wasnt actually gonna watch it but now i will

feels good to have always been an aljochad

holy shit lmfao

youtu.be/suffKomGG1w?t=9

sterling already coping

Oh yeah this totally proves the other image right, is not like the jaw shape here is completely different

Why would Aljo be reading the mma rulebook for dummies?

i can't go on twitter anymore

not a humble man of allah

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How can you tell? Looks like "reidl" to me.

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jp buys bros...

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I am unheemable. I have eaten 30 punches to the head in one fight, smashed my head against walls at full sprinting speed several times, and hit the back of my head on a toilet when i fell in the bathroom. Not even phased. I will take you to deep waters and drown you there

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>cumshot isnt in the kinobedded
cringe

aljo would hang out at a smoothie shop manicure having ass

Ok, Homer

Enjoy your CTE

*heems you*

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see you at the top

Never forget that the real p4p GOAT ragdolled DJ and never got credit...

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GUN HEEM?!?!?

I come here for everybody! Kill everybody!

>Volkanovski has two daughters
>Chan Sung Jung has two daughters and a son
Not looking good.

roiders get daughters

based clean fighter pjotr yang

The skreets are treacherous fr

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Sony4lyfe baby

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ayo frfr niga higa

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ALLAHUAKBAR!

Why do black americans say axe instead of ask

> why do black americans
why do they anything at all?

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I would like to provide you an answer but I have received a warning for racism.

Ngannou fears this. The buck-breaking era has begun.

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these bogged out promis are like zombies. scary stuff

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cuz yt peepo rasis cuh

axe jay

Welp
youtu.be/2N_7pgW0vE4?t=555

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lmao this nigga in legit highschool

reddit.com/r/ufc/comments/tw45ie/you_can_tell_khabib_misses_the_ufc/

Because they're hyper intelligent hard working people who contribute to society

smesh

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t.chinese spy

aljo, dustin, moreno

I think they made up their own lang back in the buck breaking days
Like some kind of a slang i guess

nah it's just a genetic difference

I was hating him back then
I know can agree this was pretty fuckin slick

Because it has been too long since I last met your president

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has this prime content been discussed yet? i need some answers

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Starting to feel like Aljo heems Yan and Zombie heems Volk

Should I quit my bs job and go to university again to become a teacher? Dubs decide.

meds

Not happening.

>Starting to feel like Aljo heems Yan and Zombie

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best possible outcome

I just can't bet on an ATT fighter at this point. I'm going with Aljo.

Blond suits her way better
Would not pull out

Yan is too good for that actor

You don't watch for the haircuts b? That's free inside information. Free money dawlg. I saw Sean O'Cuckley getting his hair did (a must), while seeming extra gay and cringe (and scared). I knew that Cheeto cuck was gonna get the W for sure, so I went all in. Look at me now b.

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yeah her fat distribution is like 90% to her tits

God he looks like Khabib if he was a rapist or a drug addict.

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yuck

kino

dude that clip of him being under the chin and stopping to put his mouthguard in before locking it is fucken insane b

This is an extremely gay question, but do you think being good at tennis can translate well to developing a good uppercut or hook, since you already know how to develop power from your feet and hips?

these two actually seem better than a lot of the ranked HWs to be honest
not saying much but still

there is absolutely nothing gay about tennis, MMA however is extremely gay

still my girl

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yes

go fawn over the goblina, wristlet

KZ could pull it off, I dunno what Cejudo's doing over there but fighters improve significantly after training with him

Gonna say it

The most amusing, in America, is now they say "scary" instead of "scared" now. In conflict they'll say "You a scary nigga" instead of "You're scared." Unaware that they sound like a toddler telling their mom that something is scawy.

That's because they could literally wrestlefk 75% of the top 10.

a lovely daaaay

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>magomedov
buckbros…

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retirement fight

a classic brotha vs brazza matchup

>MEGAN STOP!

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zombie bros

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Espino was cut I think, but he was truly good. One of the few HW who had a competent ground game. Romanov was gassed and used the nutshot to bail himself from the fight. Espino would''ve won if they continued. Ironically, Espino is one of the few good talents to come from TUF. But he was already pretty old, was barely active and had way too many injuries. He can be champ in other organizations though, except for ONE since they have Buchecha and Malykhin.

I remember Abusupiyan, he got knocked out in a PFL title fight. He's not that good, but then neither is Buckley I guess.

I think it could help in developing a good punch during footwork since tennis players run a lot side to side and then plant their feet to hit the ball.
The arm swing is off so it would not necessarily translate well to a hook or a uppercut specifically but it could theoretically help to develop strong punches while moving around.
I like to see the training of many different sports and think how it would translate to mma and combat sports.
Shot put players would be imo the athletes that would be the most successful in mma, they are huge and stupidly athletic and strong, the force required to throw the ball as far as they do would make ngganou sand shoveling feel like a joke.
Imo sprinters would probably be the best kickers since their training is focused on legs, Edson Barboza essentially trains like a sprinter.

Based. He's fighting fire with fire. Alexander the Juiced doesn't stand a chance.

he's just old bro

Brazzas are quite shit after the LW division. Ankalaev is the exception, but he won't be champ anyways. Jan, Rakic, Jiri and soon Jailton will gatekeep him.

well at least we have a beautiful wife and family and are one of the if not THE most well known asian mixed martial artist

these fights will all be huge upsets
>alja will start slow and avoid gassing out this time
>zombie will just swang and bang until volk is heem
>cumshot will get heemed by a wild haymaker or elbow off a clinch

>we
Meds

very possible (retard here)

Burns having power is a meme

>Zombie's twister win was 10 years ago

new chamiv drop
youtube.com/watch?v=tZnJbcVaFMc

>Meds

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WE ALL HAD HER JOHN

Korean Juicehead will heem Volkanovski, then sub Max, then move up and heem Oliveira, and then retire.

are the others here in the room right now?

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>and when you try to break my spirit
>it wont work
>because there's nothing left to break
>anymore

Who is getting the fanfiction greentext this card, Volk or KZ, Aljo or Yan, Chimaev or Burns?

Even the ones who grew up with regular normal accents/vernacular will break character and say axe. It's a funny phenomenon.

ive already seen an aljo one, but not sure if it is THE fanfiction

All

why is all the media involving Chimaev shot so cinematically

If Aljo starts slow Yan heems him. His only way to win is sub

dude is obviously some kinda borat

any fans of Tabatha Ricci's mom here?

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>His only way is to win by sub
>Didn't saw aljo getting wrestlefucked the last time
Aljo only way to victory is another DQ

Which fighter has the smallest cock in the UFC

Take them. All of them.

hot mom idd

Min Holloway

im a big fan of the Ricci family personally

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>Take them. All of them.

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yan always starts slow himself though. aljo will do nothing in the first two rounds and then he'll start going for takedowns because he knows he can't outbox yan.

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>l**pycel replying to himself
just kill yourself already

decided im not gonna watch teh 40 minute trailer for next week;s ufc. ill just stick to the embeddeds

He doesn't have a straight up button dick. There is some endomorph smaller.

just take a look at those genes

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Doesn’t look like it from that picture

it's directly in inverse order of pure power and athleticism. ngannou has the smallest, moutinho has the largest(relative to his size at least)

perfect for bgc

Who do you think is the best/biggest wmma fighter you could beat if you didn't have to make weight?

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meeegan

damn bro you're obsessed with her

which 2 heem?

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German cock right, not Greek? If not you should probably leave.

yeah...could be idd. actually she retired, right? what a lucky fortune for her

for me it's momma Ribas

ofc b. big germ cock (with a condom tho)

dookus vs dolidze

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>hairy arms
>ugly doper face
yuck

Sorry bro she was ugly and now she's bogged but to each their own

bet on dorkass, dolidze's a bum

Kookies becoming a booba poster is the best turn in recent mma history

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That made me think. They should invent a condom that is also a dildo. So men with micropeens can put on protection that makes their cock function as though it’s bigger. And through some kind of sensory technology they’ll still feel something
Or maybe we could scale it back a bit and just have a vibrator that doubles as a flashlight on the other end
I should pitch this to the UFC and see if Jon Anik will shill it between fights

Rewatching Sandhagen vs Yan. It's sad that Sandhagen is so close to being a gatekeeper

nah, a focused sandhagen can totally beat yan

Yan still wanted fuck all to do with aljo's groundgame. He can sub Yan.

already a thing b

that product exists. its called a sheath extender

How would you know that?

uh um I read about it

Sandhagen will probably get wrestlefucked by Merab next

jeez, just get really good a fingerbanging

Brapivi >>>>>>>>> Stanko and it's not even close.

>tfw prime kookies was a can

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Based rumble in the jungle poster

Ankalaev can beat any of those guys you named easily. Just because he had a boring last fight, everyone thinks he's shit. The guy is a counter-sniper and can wrestle. He will heem Jan, Jiri, and Rakic if they are aggressive, otherwise it's a boring points striking match that he also wins.

heard that the korean zombie is getting a new belt this week

Why is he the most popular active fighter? Literally no likeable qualities about him

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>Just because he had a boring last fight
fight with Krylov was boring too
Cutelaba took his heemer's spirit

i will unboy chadkalaev if he puts on another snoozer. done boying heemlets

>subbed by Paul Craig
Keep riding Goatfucker dick though.

Brazil has so much soul it's unreal

says more about you than him that you are the outlier that doesnt like him

I thought he won against Dillashaw but even if he didn't I can see him win a rematch. Yan would be tough I think. Not sure about Aljo since he got subbed that quickly. If Cejudo comes back at bantamweight i don't like Sandhagen's chances against him either

He’s not

craig can sub anyone anytime

correct !

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Do you interact with normies? The ones that know about MMA love izzy. All my cazzy friends catch every izzy fight.

I refuse to watch Merab fights

lol

Sounds like your friends are poofs

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Merab is a based retard and his fights are fun

it's just his style. he's a counter striker. if anyone tries to bang with him like Cutelaba did, they get HEEMed. he has some of the quickest and most accurate hands in the ufc. he literally dominated Craig so badly that he made an amature mistake at the last seconds because he felt like Craig was a can. then again, Craig is notorious for subbing people that are way better than him.

it will be easier if you don't cope this much b
trust me

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Fuck Dana

ayo we gonna see saturday night live on ppv

>Why is he the most popular active fighter
UFC 234 Adesanya vs. Silva 2019.02.09 175,000PPV

any fans of mma in this thread?

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any fans of take your meds logged on?

no

Why did gooby act all nice to dustbin pooyay their second fight

meegan my sneed

He was concoosed.

i dont think Ilima-Lei has ever had abs before. she might actually be training in a way that actually gets her title back this time. 125 in bellator is unironically better than ufc. nothing but IG thots and mid-tier fighters that bang. As opposed to Valentina crushing cans and the rest of the division decisioning each other

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he was bald

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Jailton is unironically a better wrestler than him, Jan can pick him apart, Rakic can do the same. Ankalaev is a bad matchup for Jiri, but I can see him beating him. I'd favor even Dookie Dom over Ankalaev. He's quite decent, but almost got slept by flushed Santos.

I agree.

based architect

yep

Absolutely

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trained with dustin today
was very nice

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Flushed Santos almost slept him when he tried to be offensive. Jan, Dom and Rakic can totally exploit this. Krylov was also better than him on the feet. He got exposed hard in his last fight. He'll beat Smiff but he will be gatekept by the other top guys in the division. Eventually will crumble to Da Un Jung, Jamahal, Jailton and Crute 3.0

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Azamat Murzakanov beats Ankalaev any day of the week, don't @ me.

did he do the math on how long a thief lived and how much life they had left? how many manhours involved in sanctioning an execution? ufc fighters need to stick to fighting

you guys heard about Loopy Godinez being ranked #6 in UFC's best debutants in 2021? seems like the UFC is kinda hype for your girl

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Louisiana bred

>female cowboy cerrone
yeehaw

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pro tip if you're hungry just drink milk it's cheaper than food and easier to consume

Based

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pro tip if you're hungry just drink water it's cheaper than milk and isn't full of estrogen

Milk is disgusting

how big are your breasts?

Is Charlito going to cheat his way to victory against Garth like he did against Doostin?

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having high estrogen is only a problem if you have low test

Hopefully yes :emojiAmem:

charlies glove grabs are no match for garths eye pokes

thank you dana for no more bisping

Wole ilk?

Screencap this... Ankalaev will be champ by the end of 2022.

full fat and organic b

>Slovenia hear that Zombie wins
Any chance that Zombie had just went out of the window thanks to spammy.

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Nah, he'll just choke JUSTin out.

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if chandler had good coaches he could have been an all time great. he got as far as he did purely on physicality

Volkanaski looks like if Mike from 90 Day worked out

if he knew how to zag*

He is too hapsplosive for his own good, he normally changes levels a lot but with Justin he want to show how tough he was and decided to just bang and not move his head at all.
Even his coaches were begging him to not be retarded.
I think he just needs a bit better strategies for his fights.

sanest thing this retard has ever said

he's already past his prime, he's just in the UFC to get paid and to have a good time

my hearing is never wrong

ay mayne he was juss stealing that motorcycle to feed his kids mayne

He already said... he came to the UFC to put on good fights, even above winning or becoming champ. He wanted to prove that he belonged in the top tier of the UFC, which he's already proved. If he instead fought smart, instead of trying to put on a show, he would not have lost yet, Oliveira was the only one that legit had a chance.

>which he's already proved
>beat THEEE dooker dan

twitter.com/oscarswillis/status/1511014078285713411

wow this is so true, glad someone finally said it

Our based African is on Helwani right now shirtless

youtu.be/6XykbxRDFhA

> fought Gaycheese in Gaycheese's style and was his equal
> almost beat Oliveira
> never had a boring fight or looked like he was losing

700 hours is not even a month and the minimum sentence for grand theft auto is over a year so if you're talking straight up revanchism the prosecutor wins the life hours wasted contest and by a lot

pro tip if you havent taken your meds take em

heard that cuckler is already engraving his name on a microphone for his commentary debut

>making $15/hour

>Well, hello prideful. You must be Dana's squeeze. And you are a project. Oh, you look nervous. Is it the record? Wanna know how I got it?
>*Grabs Islam's arm as he tries to turn away*
>C'mere, look at me. So, I had a coach, who was confident...like yours, who tells me I worry too much, who tells me l oughta fight more, who gambles and gets me in deep with the gatekeepers...
>*He squirms, Beneil pulls him back*
>Hey. One day Barboza carves my face in. And only the ufc got money for surgery. I can't take it. I just want to see him smile again. Hmm? I just wanted to let him know that I don't care about the record. So, I accept a short-notice replacement and fight Alexander... he throws a power hook... to my jaw. And you know what? My coach can't stand the sight of me! He leaves! Now I see the funny side.
>Now, I'm always smiling!

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go back and take a picture b

Don't give me a pro tip nigga you a nobody. How bout I give you a pro tip, what Imma do is imma flop my BBC out on the table when your mom fucking invites me over for dinner. You're going to see a big piece of beef on the motherfucking table. I Imma tell you to go in the kitchen and give me all the motherfucking seasonings you got. I need you to get the garlic salt, I need you to get the motherfucking seasoning salts while my BBC just sits there on the table and you just see it pulsating like moving liver, that's been taken out of a motherfucking cow. And you're just gonna stare at it and Imma be like KEEP SEASONING, stare at you, KEEP SEASONING MOTHERFUCKER you gonna be keep seasoning my meat, over and over again. Keep seasoning it nigga. And imma pull out my motherfucking god damn flop my BBC on the table its gonna go *squelch* like a slime noise cause its just covered in salt. And imma take that BBC, walk straight to your mom's mouth and stare at you. Poke it in her motherfucking grill and she be like "OHH". Imma be like "Now suck it infront of your son". And shes gonna be like *sucks dick* "I'm sorry, I just can't help it, its so flavourful". That's gonna be the pro tip I give her when I give her this flavoured BBC of seasoning salts. Dumbass nigga. Talk about a pro tip nigga you a nobody

>was his equal
cap. he got beat like a colonial housewife that burnt dinner. gaethje beat man's ass so hard he started pointing to his own soul as it left. shartles knocked the little fella out

I have high test but my estrogen is down in the teens, I unironically want to bring it up a little bit. I take cordyceps+ reishi which acts as an aromatization inhibitor, but if I stop it will bring down my T.

>gassing himself out in the first in every fight and gets dominated from round 2 onwards
>loses to gayshit who was going easy on him
he hasn't proven shit, at least 8 guys in the top 15 beat him at LW

How do yancels defend this?

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Du Plessis is claiming that Fatselum ducked him

>WHITESPLODES in SOUTH AFRICA
>WHITESPLODES in POLAND
>WHITESPLODED by ROBOCOP out of PITY
>WHITESPLODES into the POOFC
>WHITESPLOSIONS causes IMMUNITY against INTIMIDATION
>WHITESPLODES the JOKER
>EXPOSES the FARMMURDERS
>IS proudly SOUTH AFRICAN
>IS the only AFRICAN in the POOFC training in AFRICA
>DOESN'T have the CHOCOLATE BAR
>WHITESPLODES the POLICE OFFICER
>TEACHES everyone HOW TO SAY HIS NAME
>WHITESPLOSION earns PERFORMANCE OF THE NIGHT AWARD
>DOESN'T rush THINGS, takes it ONE WHITESPLOSION at A TIME
>THE only MIDDLEWEIGHT with a 100% FINISHING RATE
>WHITESPLODES inside the POOFC PERFORMANCE INSTITUTE
>WHITESPLOSIONS so INTENSE that he VOWS to NEVER go back to WELTERWEIGHT
>WARNS the other MIDDLEWEIGHTS
>WHITESPLOSION plans FOR ranked OPPONENTS
>CONFIDENT in his WHITESPLOSIVENESS against TOP 5 GUYS
>DOESN'T wish for it, WHITESPLODES for it
>WHITESPLOSIONS leads to MEETING with the BOSS MAN
>ASSURES everyone THAT if POOFC comes to AFRICA, it will be SOUTH AFRICA
>WHITESPLODES with his TEAM
>WHITESPLOSIONS earns him a spot ON another BIG PPV
>MAKES the plan to WHITESPLODE on the BORING grappler
>CONCEIVE, ACHIVE and WHITESPLODED the GRAPPLER
>IMPENDING WHITESPLOSION makes the FORMER TITLE CHALLENGER spinelessly PULL-OUT

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>a literal tranny
KEK go back

I do agree that he is already proved he belongs in the top of the ufc but fighting smart doesn't mean boring, with his power, picking his shots to punish the opponent and finishing them would still be pretty exciting to watch.
Then again, he has always fought like this, his fights with Eddie in Bellator were just like the fight with Justin, he either knocks the fuck out of people, gets knock the fuck out or stand and bangs, there is no in between for him.
But i do wish he was a bit smarter in his approach, he could have won the Justin fight if he didn't just hit to the head and keep his hands low without moving his head, he had some succes in the later rounds with bodyshot, if Chandler did that from the beginning it would have been easier to catch Justin with bombs and Chandler wouldn't have been the one completely exhausted in the later rounds.

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fucked up how Gastelum fucked up multiple fights
i really wanted to see Dricus

What do you mean, having Cejudo in your corner by itself is great for mental warfare, O'malley as frail as he might be is still one of the best strikers in the division too.
Yan saying he doesn't need advice isn't unreasonable either since he is the best in the division.
What did you mean by that?

Yan doesn't even really speak english

Chuds be like

"So true!!! But my employer earns every penny off my labor!"

That sounds like a pretty fun corner, actually. From what I remember, his actual team was denied visas, so he needs filled cornermen. Might as well get your fellow fighters to help out. Reminds me of the old Lions’ Den days.

he was doing it as a joke. he doesn't like either of them. Yan does not need corner advice, he probably has the highest fight IQ in the UFC.

>he probably has the highest fight IQ in the UFC.
>knees a downed opponent in the head

The closer we get to the fight, the more I think Khamzat is going to maul Burns

Am I retarded or not? Size difference, wrestling advantage, reach, probably power too

the best moment from embedded in recent history was when aldo was listening to the smiths
i would walk out to this charming man
youtube.com/watch?v=OYYZFx7_DS8

heard that burns is gonna shock the world this week

I realize that, user. He’s openly stated that he wants to fight both of them. I just think it would be fun if they actually showed up. It’s rare you see an all-fighter corner anymore.

Latinos fucking love the smiths, no idea why

i think either aljo, burns, or sung will win this weekend. idk who, but im certian one of the three will

stalling a fight by kneeling is right faggot behaviour

could you not tell that it was on purpose? he was tired of Aljo using that rule to avoid damage. I'm sure he didn't think Aljo would literally quit.

really, had no idea

he's gonna rape everyone he fights. he's gonna maul Usman next. then Izzy. Africa is finished.

I think either Volkanovaki or Zombie will win this weekend
idk who, but I'm certain one of them will

sussy balls

Big if true.

Let's say he does smash Usman and Israel
Does he hotshot into GOAT talks?

I’m calling the international bankers out for a bout at 185. I’ll cut down to 170 if I have to.

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pizzy is a fucking project can

>smash Usman
If he can smash that juiced up monster I dont know who could beat him
youtube.com/watch?v=9KuENfxfhSE

awww i love aldo now. i knew he was a good soccer player...and now this.
brazil how much more soulfull and a country get?

>Rhys McKee getting hyped up that he's going to fight Khamzat

twitter.com/i/status/1511062486593818634

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Speaking of Aldo, I quite enjoy it when cazzies expose themselves by not knowing he walks out to rihanna
youtu.be/1bYMGshv_88

Schaubs the kind of guy you don’t tell your gf about

it won't be "talks" at that point.

Yeah I’m a jacked Taiwanese boy whatup

Jamal?

Chinese*

yall hella excited for the ultimate fighter 30 or what

because of all the allegations against him, right?

you can tell that Chimaev is the real deal unlike most hypetrains because he gives zero fucks in there. he's smiling the whole time, like he's having fun and just knows they can't do shit to him.

ninga

If Bruns wins against Khamzat does that completly derail his hype train, would people still suck him off if he lost this fight?

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thread be like

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Because of his hog

depends on how he lost, but he won't lose. if it is a lucky ko, people probably want to see his next fight. if he gets subbed it's over.

his hawlg is smawll

ded

To me it's more how everyone talks highly of him
And not in that oh my teammate is the best way but in a genuine he's really good way. Someone found a clip of Brian Stann like 3 years ago talking about some Swede who everyone is hyping that trains with Gus

I honestly feel like burns vs chimaev is gonna go exactly like leech vs chimaev went. regardless of dilbert's bjj accolades

...

cold stone lel

confidence is so important. look at the guys who had it then lost it, they don't even look like the same person anymore. costa is a good example.

Could be a draw. Probably won't but could be.

Fuck Dana