Out of these, which would you prefer to die from

Chestbuster

but that's immortal suffering

Cenobites, I want a qt goth mutilated GF torturing me

Face hugger, if I've to go out in gruesome horror movie fashion, at least let me birth a freak super monster so others can suffer after I'm gone

that sounds like what I'm living now except I wont be afraid of dying, win win

The bear trap you die immediately and painlessly so this is no contest

it rips open your jaw but death isn't instantaneous
you probably have to wait until you bleed out

Doesn't it snap your head back and break the upper part of your neck as well?

>qt goth Cenobites
I remember that comic

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looking at how it was used on Jill the brain and neck seemed pretty untouched

>alien and infernal horrors
>or one simple escapable machine
tough choice

Shit I forgot about that scene. It probably would be a slow and agonising death as well then.

youtube.com/watch?v=YjMDc9ORFaw

Does it even hurt to get assimilated by the Thing? You probably just stop existing as yourself so that's probably the best way to die.

>escapable

I'd die by the facehugger, so I will finally have a child.

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Easily, I don’t know how so few people don’t survive the traps. There’s a million different things on each of them that could be broken pretty easily, just start tearing at everything you can on the trap.

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out of the three times the reverse bear trap is used in the series, it's only successful once

>each individual part is its own living thing
>living on forever as a consciousness inside a cosmic horror
I Have No Mouth But I Must Scream tier nightmare.

I'm not sure it would kill you instantly. In fact it would probably be like those fucked up videos of failed shotgun suicides where the dudes face is hanging off.

Can you be fixed afterwards? If so, it's worth the gamble.

bondage fetish you to death

>tfw no Cenobite gf

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in the fanfic short story from the thing's perspective, it had trouble understanding why organisms would want individuality

>knowing earth is doomed.

um, user, I...

>get to live forever
>just chilling
what's the problem?

the Thing isn't conscious, although it has the ability to function as a consciousness. they're very clear on this in the movie.

You're a living consciousness but your cells are forever being warped and manipulated. It sounds fairly painful.

I mean the beings that are assimilated. The Thing carries on its mission but you're trapped inside like some sort of locked in syndrome.

at least you're alive

chest buster because john hurt was feeling great just before it happened

Is it really a bonus in that situation?

bonus situation?

Right

Hanging out with hellraiser seems pretty chill

Didn't he complain of a sore throat/chest ache/ both?
I assume he went from terrified to comatose to mildly sore to massive suffering for a minutes followed by death.

can we talk about the bonus situation?

Right

Saw>Chestburster>Thing>Cenobites
Saw trap should kill you more or less instantly, chestburster is a few minutes of feeling like shit then maybe half a minute of intense pain, who knows what being assimilated by the Thing feels like, cenobites are literally eternal torture so fuck that.

upper right because i have no idea what that is

How do you know that people assimilated are still conscious individuals?

You come out the other end a cenobite if you have a strong enough will power.
With all the rest of them you just die and that's the end of you. No heaven and no hell.

I have never seen the Hellraiser movies, how is he still alive?

from best to worst ways to go, it's:
saw>xenomorph>the thing>cenobites

however

blair's computer simulation showed that an organism would be taken over cell by cell. So suppose you got a thing cell on your finger, you might notice that your finger had gone numb. Then your whole hand, then up your arm. Assuming the cells don't try to reach your brain and start there.
So you might notice, but it probably wouldn't be painful. When the thing cells take over a nerve ending they would probably avoid sending pain signals to the brain specifically to avoid detection. You wouldn't know about it until your entire body was basically already thingified. I guess the thing would prefer to infect you while you sleep so you don't notice this gradual takeover process.
Although to be honest the film logic contradicts the cell simulation. If it really took over cell by cell then it could just leave a single cell-thin coating on every surface, or transmit itself airborne, and everyone would be infected really easily. No need for giant monster assimilations at all.
imagine masturbating with the thingified hand

Chestbuster is only like 30-60 seconds of pain so this one. The Thing is a wildcard.

This. Cenobites is an eternity of suffering until your very soul is warped into a being of pure carnal damnation. Getting Xeno hugged is torturous face rape followed by being ripped open from the inside. I don't even know what getting Thing'd would be like, you might be stuck as part of it for years, maybe forever. Bear trap will hurt like a cunt but even if it doesn't destroy your brain you would bleed out quite quickly, dead before the shock wears off.

Are they?
Macready sharing a drink with a possibly-thing Childs loses some of its effect if you can't imagine that the thing is sharing a drink with a worthy adversary.

which is worse? Cenobites or Sarlacc pit?

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Between Mac saying that each individual piece is its own animal with a desire to survive plus the way Windows is still screaming as hes being assimilated when he gets torched. I guess its retarded fan fiction tier thoughts but the idea that you're basically filed away as a costume for it to bring forth and manipulate at will always seemed more horrifying to me.

>getting cucked out of cenopussy

What would they do if the guy was into NTR?

with the sarlacc, worst case scenario is you live for a couple days before dying
with the cenobites the worst case scenario is eternal torture

Apparently a Sarlacc pit isn't that bad because boba fett managed to just fly out of one in the EU

at least I'd have a boner with the facehugger

>have your jaw broken off and bleed to death
>endless nightmare fucboi for cosmic fetlife nerds with godpowers
>assimilated at a cellular level, possibly not terminating your conscience mind
>used as a living womb, largely painless until birth
Facehugger is the way to go. You are not in constant pain, though you may be stuck the wall of a hive depending on how you encounter the facehugger. Death will be painful, but it won't last that long.

>I mean the beings that are assimilated. The Thing carries on its mission but you're trapped inside like some sort of locked in syndrome.

the movie actually uses the most "hard-science" approach to consciousness: there's no such thing as "you" except as the sum-total of your nervous system.

it doesn't imply the Thing is psychic or has a way of controlling it's individual cells except as part of an organism, so the only logical conclusion is that each cell separately has the ability to rewire a nervous system to help spread itself in an unobtrusive way, and can also cooperate with other infected cells to function as a whole.

Me on the bottom right.

Then how does it perfectly imitate behaviour and speech patterns?

read the blurb by the photos on the left hand side.

apparently the sarlacc assimilates the victims and feeds on their psychic torture while keeping them alive for thousands of years. who knows how cannon that is, but if so its pretty fucked up

so where do "you" end and begin?

good for him
I guess
it is already a good thing that he enjoy the pain
there are people in there that can't barely handle the pain let alone enjoy it

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You forgot the fact that you get mouth raped with facehuggers as well

Cenobites. Maybe I can become one.

Yes, that sucks, though it seems the victim is sedated rather quickly. Still rather that than half my face getting ripped off and waiting to bleed out, slowly. Who knows how long you could live with just your jaw getting ripped off.

Yeah, but if you don't have the jetpack and the mandalorian armor, you're pretty screwed.

I don't think very long. I'd imagine that you would pass out from the shock after a few seconds

>feeds on their psychic torture
that's not even in the blurbs

I don't know, but the Sarlacc gives me a mega-boner, so I pick that.

it says literally "absorbs the intellect of its victims and is capable of sustaining their torment for thousands of years"

that sounds like fucking psychic torture to me. actually read the blurb next time

The Thing because you wouldn't even realise it.

It is, though.
Also, with the Alien you get to be part of a kino lifecycle and not a faggot tryhard jigsaw trap.

you'd go into shock and bleed out pretty quickly, of course the blood flow to the brain isn't routed through the face or jaw so you'd still get fresh blood pumping into the brain which makes things take longer
if you were lucky, some part of your sphenoid would get broken and shoved into your brain

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that doesnt seem canon
it says "attacked" where it should say "attached"
disney cant afford people checking the text?

>absorb intellect
>psychic torture
you're making changes because you think the terms or phrases are close enough, just stick to what it actually says instead of trying to inflate your argument
further more,
>is believed
so who the fuck knows

likely came out before disney, back when lucas was letting just about anyone and everyone do an illustration book or a cross section book about whatever the fuck they wanted for star wars in an attempt to add encyclopedic levels of detail to the universe on every single race or ship or planet to be features, even if only for a few frames of screentime.

the sheer volume of media produced expounding upon the original trilogy and especially the prequel trilogy was roughly equivalent to half of all the content currently existing on wikipedia. they just havent been able to scan it all yet because not enough humans exist to be able to undertake such a work

tldr; Lucas likes money and royalties

ok buddy. what do you think psychic torture means then? if psychic torture is not an adequate paraphrase of what was described in that blurb, than what word would you use?

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>tfw I know that cenobites is the worst choice but I'm into BDSM and wouldn't be able to resist the temptation.

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based find out you're wrong but then keep arguing the same point out of sheer spite user

Angels to you.

so lucas probably never read any of that

someone could write a book saying han solo is gay and he has gay sex with the wookie, so that's now canon

before disney came in and eliminated the EU, yeah, pretty much. lucas gave hordes of writers and artists license to canonize whatever they wanted so long as he got to collect royalties and merchandising money off of it.

have you followed star wars at all for the last 40 years?

I've seen a porn cenobite clip in POV where you get sucked off by a female pinhead.

Immortal? More like nig-

The Cenobites. With them you're guaranteed an afterlife.

I never asked to exist in the first place, I certainly wouldn't ask for more.

Top right is supposed to be beyond pleasure and pain. And you don't die, or I forget.

Saw, without a doubt. Then Cenobites, then Thing, then >>>>>>>>>>>>>> Alien

well, fuck.

>With all the rest of them you just die and that's the end of you. No heaven and no hell.
Kill yourself you tipping atheist faggot shit

cenobites only answer, you dont even get to enjoy thing or facehugger
and saw is eyeroll tier

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Based vorefag

you think you can just post that without providing a link or anything?

based quads

you could potentially live through the facehugger by getting put in stasis and then emergency surgery

They're all horrible ways to die, fuck, i can't choose

Going off of The Hellbound Heart, definitely the Cenobites. At least I might extract some joy out of the whole experience.
Least pleasant concept for me is the facehugger. Jigsaw's trap & The Thing will kill me pretty much instantly.

yeah, but you get face raped, and you'll have to live with that burden forever. With the others, at least your dignity is safe.

hot

>you... sucked?

You'd be pretty lucky if you can manage all of that. The facehugger killed a Predator.

good choices, very tough. Reverse bear trap sucks ass. Get your fucking jaw ripped off and just sit there trapped, in pain waiting to bleed to death. Dying to cenobites is just fucking literal torturing to death, no thanks. The thing is 10/10 horrifying but if you're lucky you might die quick. Facehugger is also fucking horrifying, and disgusting as it sticks it's whatever down your throat and feeds and seeds you. Sure you go into a coma for a while but eventually you'll wake up and have an alien painfully burst out of your fucking stomach, which wouldn't kill you instantly either.

I'll take the gamble and go with the thing.

it gives me a massive boner to be honest.
I'll pick Facehugger

With the thing, assuming you're being assimilated and not just being killed by a the thing, being assimilated probably wouldn't be so bad. I'd imagine Either you get assimilated without realizing it and then just die horribly instantly with like two seconds of pain when the thing emerges, or you die from being assimilated, which having your cells gradually be replaced would probably be like a weird form of passing out.

Compared to an eternity of torture with cenobites, being faceraped having your chest explode and then dying of trauma with aliens, or having your face ripped open by the bear trap and dying of trauma if you aren't lucky enough just instantly die from it, which you probably won't.

yeah with the thing and the cenobites your dignity is totally safe

>and feeds and seeds you
Ahh, I see you're a man of culture as well.

>being assimilated probably wouldn't be so bad
Imagine if you were assimilated and your mind was still somehow conscious. Like being aware, but in some kind of excruciating paralyzed state. Oof

Chestbuster. its painful but it ends quickly. its also kind of erotic in a perverted way.

getting assimilated into a morphing blob or suffering barbed wire in your peehole for all eternity? no Ill pass

yeah, I mean, sure, you may look silly when you turn into the thing and your mates will poke fun at you, but your manlihood is intact. Hell, maybe the Thing will feel generous and turn it into some five feet long tentacle for shits and giggles.

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Horrorporn on pornhub my nigga

>you may look silly when you turn into the thing and your mates will poke fun at you
That'd be the least of my concerns desu. Have you seen that abomination? I'd rather pick anything else. Disgusting life form.

The Thing's under your bed user, be weary.

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Just as I'm about to go to bed. Thanks satan.

I always wanted to be the Thing.

>tfw no Thing gf that can morph into anything you desire

What are The Thing's tax policies?

cant be worse than an american prison getting passed from Tyrone to DeMarquise

lmao, why're religi-cucks so easily offended?

Windows was still being assimilated though; he would've probably stopped screaming when it had eaten all of him

>He doesn't want to suffer for all eternity

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Xenobirth, the morph contains some of its hosts DNA and it’s the only way I’ll ever be able to pass my genes on.

IMAGINE GETTING KEKED BY A ELDRITCH GOD

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The reverse bear trap, you probably wouldn't even die.

The Thing, i want to become part of something greater.

High IQ post
Come and be assimilated child

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I know right.....

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It's only suffering for so long. At a certain point it all just becomes sensory input and you start liking it, which is arguably a better end than the other three options.

>bursts out of chest
>slimes down the basement
>starts shitposting on Yea Forums
>'tfw 36h old and still virgin'

heh

imagine if all things that were assimilated, also had their individual memories and emotions morphed into one consciousness with the thing. This consciousness thinks it is all the different people and living things at the same time, each feeling their emotions of confusion and horror, wanting to break free, wanting to not kill. But they have no control because the thing is the only one totally in control.

I can’t finish my yogurt because your fetishes disgust me I PAID 6$ FOR THIS FUCK YOU

Make you listen to green day and my chemical romance until you kill yourself

Im sure they have other ways to torture and make you go insane. like avoiding any input. they could cut off your arms and legs, eyes and ears and let you rot somewhere in the labyrinth being trapped inside of you

That's my headcanon from now on, simply because something that was already fucked up becomes even more fucked up.

No I mean, in-universe that's how you become a Cenobite. Eventually you stop being one of the guys chained to a wall and start walking around giving speeches with spikes shoved in your nutsack.

One guy starts beating off....the entire planet simultaneously feels it

you sure?
iirc you solve the cube puzzle and the Cenobites showing up decide on the spot if they torture you or turn you into one of them if you are worthy

How would the Thing/Cenobites deal with the bonus situation?

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But how long would it take to get to that point?

>mfw the whole aliens series revolves around a jewish shekel scheme

To be honest I'm not. I swear that's how it was at some point, but between the books, comics, and films I might be mixing lore or something.

A long fucking time.

It's literally a line in the movie. youtube.com/watch?v=nAnkFVaKnec