Character spends less than an hour on the toilet

>character spends less than an hour on the toilet

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eat more fiber, drink more water, go for walks

>guy doesn't get a boner while shitting

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>cast doesn't wear adult diapers

>character doesn't have to pee every 40 minutes and when he piss it comes out as a stream instead of in dribbles
movies are so unrealistic

>character doesn't spent 5 mins trying to get the last dribbles out, buttons up his pants and a big piss stain appears down the side of his leg.
I have to turn off a movie when pisses aren't like this.

>character wears clothes in his own home
>character doesn't take all clothes off to shit

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Naked shits are the best shits, to be honest.

are you all actual invalids? wtf is wrong with you

This. Going poop naked is so comfy.

jerking off while your ass still burns from taking a huge shit feels too good

>character doesn't piss in the sink
Sink pisses are great. Especially in other peoples houses.

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literally me
why does this happen bros? should I be worried?

I concur.

No one can possibly argue with that

I used to be worried about it. I though that piss stuff only happened to pensioners but then I realised it happens to everyone sooner or later.

checked my dude and yeah i also suffer from dribbles guess it comes with ages do cutfags have it easier on this?

>character has to take a shower
>turns on the water and goes straight in without checking the temperature

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>couple have sex
>they finish
>guy rool on his side of the bed
>girl cover her tits for absolutly no reason

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>she lays there leaking instead of immediately getting up and going to the bathroom to clean her pussy
you're gonna stain his sheets you cunt

>piss
>know there is some left in my wiener
>violently milk my cock until eye rolling orgasm
>legs literally shaking
>piss all gone thanks to cum shooting out of cock

>she doesn't make the guy lap his own cum out of her pussy
Ruins the immersion.

I would kill myself if I wasn't regular. It literally takes me seconds to be done.
Eat better my dudes.

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There's too much black mold in my bathroom right now, so I don't like to spend that much time in there

post pic

>character gets constipated for the trillionth time
>takes laxatives
>they don’t work

>not shitting in the shower and using a shower water + piss stream combo to break the shit apart so it goes down the drain

No I'm a cut fag and have to waggle my peeper dry for a long time after finishing pissing

If anything I assumed having a foreskin would catch excess urine

Or at the very least you could do like and fucking pinch your frenulum for 5 seconds and jizz all over the place and clean out the pipes that way

God I hate his retarded infant knife rape practice why did my parents have to be brain dead boomers

Something between coldness and lukewarmness is how I would describe my feelings for this post. Maybe there's a hint of curiosity too because why else would I reply to it? I had a physical reaction which was blinking hard four-five times, but that may have just been my attempt to clear my mind so I could write this post(I'm a bad writer). I believe there's nothing out of the ordinary with this post, but I want to know why you greentexted it like you did. If there's no reason you don't have to respond back.

>Character doesn't spend at least three hours each day drinking coffee

It's called envy the feeling you just experienced , due to not having a foreskin. Men who didn't get raped with knives as infants , experience pleasure when they touch their penis . It's a radical concept to many Americans

>character doesn't take a shower after shitting