THE STANLEY KUBRICK BORED-O-METER The length of time before I get bored and and turn off the movie.
Paths of Glory: 00:06:27 - Too much dam talking. War movies are supposed to be exciting, but all I see are a bunch of guys of guys in a trench.
Spartacus: The Whole Thing - This is my kind of movie. Action and adventure. Too bad his other movies all suck.
Dr. Strangelove: 00:04:12 - Another war movie with boring talking?! Didn't Kubrick learn his lesson from Paths of Glory?! For fucks sake. Plus why the hell is this shit black and white? This came out in the 60's they had color.
2001: A space Odyssey: 00:02:23 - What the hell is up with all these boring scenic panoramas? I thought this was supposed to be in space. If Kubrick isn't going to bother making a watchable movie I'm not going to bother watching it.
A Clockwork Orange: 00:15:32 - The beginning was great and was very promising. I really liked the violence and profanity. Then Alex gets all emo and that terrible accent drove me nuts.
Barry Lyndon: Didn't even bother watching - All I did was read the back of the DVD box and I could tell this would be a piece of shit. Costume dramas are automatically boring and with Kubrick as director it would be double boring. I don't fucking care it was entirely filmed with natural light, do I look like film school student?! Most people don't give two halfs a flying fuck.
The Shining: 00:01:57 - A car driving on a lonely forest road. I fucking get it.
Full Metal Jacket: 00:45:45 - The boot Camp scenes were great cinema. The second they went to Vietnam it sucked.
Eyes Wide Shut: I'm not touching this movie with a ten foot pole. - Stanley Kubrick died two weeks after this movie was finished. He probably watched this and died of boredom. Plus Tom Cruise is in this, blegh.
4/10 you put effort into it unlike most bait nowadays
Tyler Gutierrez
You gotta give every movie 10 minutes at least. How the fuck do turn off the Shining after 2 minutes? It's worth it just to see the shots of the hotel.
Juan Sullivan
i feel ya op. sometimes i jump too quickly to make a bait post i think will take off like wildfire and it just dies at the execution. next time, maybe.
Evan Davis
Absolutely based
Connor Martinez
Based retard
Isaiah Baker
Megabased
Colton Cox
Based. Fuck cinema.
Jack Carter
It's funny to see how the human attention span dwindles with every decade. The internet with its fast access to excessive amounts to empty information really took its toll on the people. Myself included. Even though I value Kubrick a lot for his exposure of MK Ultra, the moon landing shiy and elite degeneracy/power abuse, the scenes drag out absurdly.
Have it go back to Lawrence of Arabia, that shit had a inter mission
Dominic Sanders
BASED
Nathaniel Myers
Why did he look like such a creep? Couldn't he properly trim his beard or take a few naps?
Jeremiah Torres
>increased from 108 to 111 WOAH DUDE MOVIES ARE GETTING LONGER OUR IQS ARE INCREASING
Blake Smith
>2001: A space Odyssey: 00:02:23 There are multiple minutes of black nothingness and you complain about the actual space panoramas?
Cooper Thompson
okay, now lets get a chart that has "minutes before viewer checked his/her phone after start of movie"
Joshua Gutierrez
more time to squeeze CGI and splosions into.
Levi Butler
best post ive seen in months
Blake Butler
Kek
Hunter Ramirez
Because retarded zoomers think they're cheating the system by only paying for long movies at the cinema
Ryan Bailey
Congratulations, you made the ultimate pasta for all tha/tv/vermin who roams around here. Now go back choking with nigger dicks.
Camden Anderson
if no ones gonna say it i might as well BASED
Owen Clark
You seriously need to end your life.
Isaac Cox
I actually have been going through his movies recently. The Shining I thought was completely “okay”, I didn’t really get much out of it, but I did turn 2001 off after about an hour. There’s way too little happening. I can handle slow movies but by god can something fucking happen that isn’t just a 10 minute sequence of plastic models of spaceships floating around. Please tell me the rest of his movies have better pacing
Landon Stewart
This is the worst thread I've since I'm a week, congratulations faggot.
David Diaz
Old movies just really aren't that good. I'm surprised people see themselves as connoisseurs for liking that shit. Go read a book. Movies aren't a real hobby.
Zachary King
please post this on r/truefilm, the reactions will be much better as redditors' proclivity for outrage outweighs their ability to discern satire
