Yes, yes, well done, Slytherin. Well done, Slytherin

...

>Have a literal “bad guys” fraternity
>School keeps them when any IRL dean would shitcan them tomorrow

Merlin was a Slytherin

Gryffindors stopped the greatest dark wizard of all time from regaining his power and plunging the world into shadow. What did Slytherin do?

And?

WE

You just dont understand british banter la

NEVIL LONGBOTTOM GODS WHAT A STUPID NAME, WHO NAMED YOU SOME HALF WIT WITH A STUTTER

He couldn't resist shooting up heroin, though.

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Literally just watched this last night

Whoa...

>spend hours studying
>literally cooked up on wizard Aderall and antidepressives due to extreme pressure
>finally managed to beat every other house due to sheer will and stubbornness
>headmaster decides to give Griffyndor a gorillion points because of a SINGLE NIGHT OF EFFORT
Tell me how this is fair, lads.

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But then wasn't it established that Snape was systematically playing favoritism with how he awarded and deducted points? But I guess this is how it goes: systematic small acts of favoritism are just the way of the world, but single big acts of favoritism are unfair.

>teacher is "evil", a death eater and follows a dark lord with snakelike features
>call him SNAPE
Bravo, Rowling.

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Considering that they lost 50 points each for being out of bed at night, I think 170 is fair for stopping wizard Hitler from gaining immortality. Malfoy had an opportunity to befriend Potter at the beginning of the year and decided to be a prat instead. Slytherin is just Ravenclaw for kids that can't see farther than their own nose.

Uhhh, maybe cause it's the fact that they literally saved the world??? Stupid Slythercuck get dunked on.

>Malfoy had an opportunity to befriend Potter at the beginning of the year and decided to be a prat instead
Harry was a prat and refused to shake his hand.

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Except that it wasn't explicit for Slytherin students at any point in the story.

>Considering that they lost 50 points each for being out of bed at night
1) Not the first time they were caught breaking rules and they were warned that next time the heads will roll
2) They got caught AGAIN, by one of the strictest teachers in the school
The they were good bois they dindu nuffin defense doesn't really work here, but your point about stopping a wizard Hitler is worth 170 points is pretty solid, yeah.

Because Malfoy dissed the first friend Harry ever had 5 seconds in. No tact.

>Considering that they lost 50 points each for being out of bed at night
And Malfoy only lost 20 for exactly the same thing

If Harry was a chad he would have hooked Malfoy in the gabber and then helped him back up, to assert dominance.

Snape cheated Slytherin into winning in the first place anyway.

based, however...

NO!

Then punish Snape, don’t pull this bullshit and screw over the other 2 houses

Gryffindors are white knights
Hufflepuffs are normies who watch the office and Rick and Morty all day
Slytherin are literally the definition of evil
Ravenclaws are
>????

r/iAmVerySmart

Well generally when someone does something wrong, you try and right that wrong. After all, do Slytherin actually deserve to win, if they only won through Snape's malfeasance?

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>Did none of the other staff have an issue with this blatant display of favoritism?
No because fuck Slytherin! Then they wonder why all the kids from the "bad" house turn on them as adults. Putting kids into these houses dictates their entire future so much that I'm sure everyone from Hufflepuff is unemployed. would you hire somebody from Hufflepuff? I didn't think so

Harry Ron Hermione just kicked the shit out of Dumbledore's and the four Head of House's ( and Hagrid ) super duper obstacle course and all risked their lives to stop Moldy Voldy from coming back and getting a means to become immortal.
And Neville got a few good boy points for trying to enforce the rules.

WTF did Slytherin do? Half their points are from Snape cheating anyways and the other half is winning Quidditch.

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technically of those points were earned on the final night of the school year. Harry just hadn't been out of the hospital yet to receive them.

Never understood the appeal of these books/movies

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How did Hogwarts make money? Did they charge tuition? It doesn't sound like they did. Who paid the professors and staff?

plenty of decent Slytherins.
Merlin. Slughorn. Bellatrix and Narcissa's sister (Tonk's Mom) Andromeda. Even Sirius' brother turned good.

It's just 80% of the kids in Harry's classes were kids of death eaters. And they were Death Eaters cause than hung out with Tom Riddle in school.

PS nobody cares about what House you were in long after wizard high school cept people that cant let go like Hagrid who never left and Sirius who got locked away not long after.
Even Lupin didn't care.
Hell the other school's in Europe dont even seem to have seperate houses.

Presumably the Ministry pays for it, where the Ministry gets money I don't know, defrauding the government?

And Newt, who for some reason needs to remind the audience he’s Hufflepuff even though it had nothing to do with anything until a shoehorned plot point in the second FB movie.

So was Albus Severus Potter.

Slytherin had won something like the last 14 house cups in a row, Dumbledore was just being a good headmaster and teaching his most successful students not to get complacent.

Newt is autistic so of course he'd care about shit no one else really thinks about.

Can the protagonist of your favorite movie withstand Albus Dumbledore's forceful spell?
harrypotter.fandom.com/wiki/Albus_Dumbledore's_forceful_spell

>harrypotter.fandom.com/wiki/Albus_Dumbledore's_forceful_spell

That's easily one of the most ridiculous things I have ever read.

Ernie MacMillan was a Hufflepuff and just as rich and snobby as Malfoy. Harry even said he's pompous but was cool with it cause he was on his side vs Malfoy.
Hermione is a complete cunt to Luna till she can use her dad's shitty magazine to tell Harry's story. Luna even made a show of supporting Harry during the Triwizard tourny and Hermione straight up says fuck her you can do better than her as a friend.
And Ron's a stuck up prick to anyone he doesn't like. He's poor but still just as arrogant as Malfoy.

Wizard taxes. What was Fudge's tax policy?

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It's pretty clear Fudge is a Conservative and supports Regressive Tax policies that favor the rich as seen by how favored he was by Malfoy (another Conservative)

>PAY OR PIE!

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STOP CURSING THINK ABOUT THE ADVERTISERS

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They borrow it from the (((goblins))), becoming further and further entrapped in an endless spiral of debt that will culminate in their eventual enslavement.

Sometimes I really wonder if Rowling was going through an anti-semitic phase

This is further supported by the fact that the weasels are poor despite the fact that they can literally conjure everything they need from thin air.
The only thing that could possibly be affecting their income are taxes and tuition fees.

wtf

I need the original webm

im guessing Arthur has been fined and sanctioned many times for enchanting muggle artifacts.
all the magical talent in that family cones from Molly's side, The Prewetts. Weasleys are Lovegood tier weirdos.

>It wouldn't be the first time, either," said a Ministry insider. "Cornelius 'Goblin-Crusher' Fudge, that's what his friends call him, if you could hear him when he thinks no one's listening, oh, he's always talking about the goblins and he's had done in; he's had them drowned, he's had them dropped off buildings, he's had them poisoned, he's had them cooked in pies
Jesus Rowling, why not throw in a line or two about fucking gas chambers while you're at it

I mean they did save the day from Voldemort. Pretty sure delaying the ride of wizard hitler has to be worth a medal or two

>he doesn't read The Quibbler

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Despite the numerous flaws and reddit tier fanbase, Harry Potter as a series manages to have a thousand times more soul and artistry than any MCU movie or indeed 90% of big budget cinema releases coming out today. Every time I rewatch them I'm reminded that films are actually meant to give you feel emotions and absorb you into their world, not just exist to cram in as many quips and ebic CGI actions scenes every ten minutes.

It's amazing how many based things have come out of books written by a complete retard. Something happened to that woman

REEEE WHY DIDN'T SHE END UP WITH HARRY

Perhaps the ministries coffers are filled by fining muggleboos and abusing goblins then

youtu.be/bN1_h_eGitE

this was really well done

Slytherin winning the year would have been too nuanced for the books and the audience. It would have shown that even if you are the best and do do everything correctly you still might not win everything every time. And it would have required showing the Harry and the others taking the loss in stride and letting the other house have this win while they go and celebrate there own thing separately.

>Give the Mudblood girl the wizard culture exposition.
Ron really became pointless by book 3 or 4.

Wow I cannot type worth shit tonight.
Also: do do

Ravenclaw should have won.

she wanted to fit in so she learned as much as she could
Ron was busy being a top Quidditch Keeper, getting crazy bjs from 16 year old Lav Lav, helping Harry train the DA, hunting Horcruxes, ( even if he bailed he came back right at the perfect time to save Harry's life ) ect...
Ron's a man of action. He grew up with all the wizard stuff being the norm. Doesn't really think to much about obscure fairy tales.
Plus he knew the story well enough to chime in here and there. Hermione was just reading it cause it's her book and Luna's dad specifically asked her to.

He was always an unnecessary character really. I guess he brings that childhood trio nostalgia to everything but I think just the duo of Hermione and Harry could have been kino

Ron has done at the very least one major helpful thing in each book that the other two couldn't.

This is actually true. I don't even think about the fanbase, much less interact with it in any way, but the Harry Potter films really are just nothing short of pure /comfy/, immersive for sure.

t. literally rewatching them right now.

>Ron's a man of action.
You only say that because he is more obviously not a man of thought. Same reason people refer to him as the "heart" of the trio even though he is callous and has "the emotional range of a teaspoon. It's just far more obvious he is not the "Brain" of the group.
>Plus he knew the story well enough
A bastardized version his mom told him that was only brought up so that he could look like an idiot.
>Hermione was just reading it cause it's her book and Luna's dad specifically asked her to.
and Rowling specifically wrote that taking away the one thing Ron's character was good for in the early books.
Yeah Harry pretty quickly gets a handle on the wizarding world while Hermione surpasses Ron in general knowledge.

Factually correct. The winter shots of Hogwarts are so soul warming and charming, I can't even put it into words.

Nobody even cared about house points after the 1st year anyways

Name one thing Ron has going for him over the other two or one thing that he's done that the other two couldn't- other than always using his house as a refuge that it

Also this. It's fucking unfortunate that a slice-of-life adventures that were first 3 books turned into another teenagers saving the whole world shenanigans.

actually I just remembered he did the wizard chess thing, but I can't think of anything else

Goblet of Fire and Half Blood Prince have a decent amount of SoL in them

I find it odd when Pottermore was a thing, EVERYONE was actively avoiding being sorted to Gryffindor. Why is that?

It's the default and therefore boring house

Who /death_eater/ here?

FUCK HOGWARTS
FUCK DUMBLEDORE
AND
FUCK MUGGLES

Hipsters. Gryffindor is "too mainstream", and a lot of people actually tried to get sorted into Slytherin just to be the cool kids.

I'm all in favour of might is right and wizards ruling the world but they've demonstrated time and time again that they are all massive retards whose governments are corrupt as fuck and they believe sensationalism in even more blatant forms than we do. Clearly relying on magic has made the wizards in Harry Potter degenerate in intelligence compared to muggles who had to develop technology

why not automatically send every slytherin student to Azkaban the moment they step out off school?
Minority Wizardry

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Hufflepuff are just a house of breeding. That is literally their existence.

youtube.com/watch?v=3owSSPoTdaE
How did they get away with this?

MIDF detected

Fuck off shill. Muggles can't even do magic. Confirmed low IQ. Or are you a muggle? Filthy fucking mudbloods and their psyops

Why the fuck was Filch such a spiteful asshole? Ok, so he was a squib, but even still, they kept him around only for him to be the biggest dick in the whole school for no reason.

Slytherin are evil so it makes sense for them to lose

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he bailed them out of plenty of times like in malfoy cellar

Arthur works the equivalent of magical janitor (literally shows up to clean up magic messes) while Molly is a stay at home mom forced to take care of a brood of like 9 kids. All their money probably went to food and spell books which cost the equivalent of hundreds of pounds.

Arguable. Even with modern tech like we have now, Magic is just much more convenient. Even being a shitty ass magic user, it much more interesting living in a magical world than the shit we're living right now.

Ron was never pointless in the books; in the movies his role was given to Hermione. So Hermione fulfills Ron and her roles, while Ron is just superfluous comic relief.

That was all gone by book 4. All he does is create pointless drama.
4
>Harry! I don't believe you when you said you didn't break through Dumbledore's barrier all by yourself even though no one else could.
>The triwizard tournament is dangerous so I believe you now!
5
I can't remember him doing anything other than be Hermione's spell target in DA and falling into a vat of brains that made him smarter at the DoM
6
>Haha Women are dumb Harry!
>Why won't Hermione date me? Better hook up with this rando fatty.
7
>Hunting for voldy's soul sucks! I'm leaving!
>Wait I'm back.

Richard Harris was so good for those movies. It sucks he died at a relatively young age.

>I'm all in favour of might is right and wizards ruling the world
Problem with this is that muggle society would fucking crush wizarding society in a conventional war.
All the magic in the world won't save you from a shrapnel shell that you never saw coming because it was fired at you from a howitzer battery buried in a trench line 40 kilometres away.

Where do wizards shop for food? Do they have some big magical supermarket somewhere? God damn the worldbuilding is so shit

Who by date of birth is a zoomer.

True. Wizards might have stood a chance before modern war tech and if they had taken over before the muggle population exploded into the billions, but they left it too late and hid away in little secret alcoves like the cucks they are

...

not really
like wizards could do instant teleport and literally hide a place from being found

That's a pretty good question. Maybe there's magical farmers? You could probably make an absolute killing using magic to grow vegetables considering Hagrid an untrained mongrel basically was able to grow punpkins the size of houses in CoS I think.

YO LIL VOLDY

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>Year 1
Offers friendship to Harry,
Gives Harry his Dumbledore choco frog which lets Harry remember who Nicholas Flamel was,
wins realife Wizard Chess against im guessing McGonigal since she enchanted it AND willingly sacrificed himself to get the others to the next test.

>Year 2
Rescues Harry from the Dursleys with the twins (even though his parents were going to the next day it's still a big thing to do)
shares his room for the Summer,
Suggests flying the car which literally saves their lives later in the forbidden forest,
trys to jinx malfoy for the mudblood comment,
sucks up his fear of spiders to travel with Harry to see Aragog,
Is the key to realizing the chamber opened before because he remembered Tom Riddle got awarded for special services to Hogwartz,
His busted ass wand is the only thing that saved them both from Lockhart's mind wipe

>Year 3
this might actually be his weakest year actually
i cant think of much he didnt mess up

>Year 4
Gets Harry tickets to the Quidditch Cup where Harry gets to learn a lot of clues to whats going to happen,
Acts like a major dick from the moment Harry's name popped out till after the first task
After that he's all in as Harry's best friend without falter till year 7
big part of helping Harry train

>Year 5
basically a JR member of the Order of the Phoenix,
Member of the DA.
Accio Brain otherwise they were all screwed there

>Year 6
eh not much outside of his personal life but if he hadn't inadvertently drunken the poison wine Slughorn and his memory would be long dead
fights alongside DA and Order

>Year 7
Willing to pretend to be Harry as they leave the Dursley,
Saves Tonks with some expert wandwork
Goes with the others hunting Horcruxes
Useful in the ministry
Comes back and saves Harry from the lake
Thanks of Shell Cottage and knows the secret to tell them
Useful in Gringotts
Thinks of the Basilisk fangs AND fakes parseltounge to get in
Fights in the battle of Hogwartz

As Napoleon said: an enemy who stays in his fortifications is beaten, if the best they can do is hide really well then they aren't a military threat.
As for teleportation, unless they already have boots on the ground at the other end any wizard who uses it to try and get the drop on a muggle unit is effectively going in blind. They may as well cut out the middleman and get someone nearby to shoot them in the back instead

The last four movies are the very definition of soulless

Well done Slytherin, well done...
"To all Gryffindors... Cheers. Cheers, my friends. It has been an honour. Cheers!"

Dumbledore fixes his eyes on the Slytherin table, completely ignoring Ravenclaw and the other one

"Now Slytherin... I know we have had our differences, but your ambition and hard work is truly something to behold. Admirable!"

the Slytherins are cautious. Dumbledore usually follows up a praise with some humiliation and injustice

"Indeed, I have a special treat for you all because of these traits. It's so good, that you'll love it despite its Muggle origin. It is a large apparatus which all of you can fit in which will confer all of you a deeply unique experience that shall benefit us all. A chamber of sorts. I have had that room over there fitted with the apparatus. Move along, children, shuffle into it now. You too, Snape*

the Slytherins flood into the room, some cautious and some excited

Dumbledore slams the door shut and enchants it to be locked and airtight. He turns to the other houses

"And that special treat? That "unique experience" the Slytherins shall all experience and you all won't?*

"..."

"...Why, it's... DEATH! FUCK SLYTHERIN! THE FINAL SOLUTION TO THE SLYTHERIN MENACE BEGINS NOW! PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL, TURN ON THE GAS! YES, YES, WELL DONE, SLYTHERIN! WELL DO E SLYTHERIN FOR DYING SO WELL! SIX MILLION POINTS TO A HOUSE THAT SHALL CEASE TO EXIST IN 5 MINUTES!"

as Dumbledore's mouth foams during his blood-crazed tirade, the hall erupts into applause and a massive, inter-house orgy ensues. The Slytherins begin dying in the gas chamber. As Malfoy chokes on his own blood, Harry proves himself to be a sexual dominant member of the orgy

Dumbledore looks on with pride

*Years later Harry Potter tells recounts these events to his son, Albus, with Ginny smiling warmly at the memory.

"And that's how Dumbledore exterminated the Slytherin scum. HEIL GODRIC! Dumbledore truly was the greatest headmaster of them all, and a good friend"

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>You could probably make an absolute killing using magic to grow vegetables
Probably not since I doubt it would be very hard for most wizards to do the same and the Weasleys live on a farm after all

I agree that the last two were soulless but not 5 or 6. Less soulful than the previous ones perhaps but still good

Many of these things could have been written into Hermione's character except all the wizarding world knowledge stuff but I commend your autism nonetheless

I dunno. For whatever reason wizards tend to be incompetent when it comes to certain schools of spells (charms vs curses and shit, McG says something to the effect to Neville). They probably aren't all capable of growing food like that.

>even if you are the best and do do everything correctly you still might not win everything every time
>Harry and the others taking the loss in stride and letting the other house have this win while they go and celebrate there own thing separately.
This would've been kino.

3/10 not very good or funny desu
sorry user

Slyterin are incels. Thats why this board defends them so vehementley.

I've never understood why some spells are meant to be harder than others when 90% of them come down to saying a word or two and then making a wand movement. We never see complex runes being set up or long, intricate enchantments. The closest thing to complexity we see is usually in the creation of potions.

kek

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Rowling just never bothers to explain it. Closest we get is the fake Mad-eye saying that some spells require more "magic power."

None of the other houses shitter students saved the wizarding world from Voldemort's return the night before.

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and then you get Pettigrew casting the unblock-able insta-kill spell at the end of the same book

youtube.com/watch?v=MUylUsG-PKA
when you want win but someone in the house is getting lot minus points.

Some things require you to think mean thoughts like the cruciatus curse which is why Harry couldn't use it right.

well yeah or Dean and Seamus
my point is Ron always played an important role.
Hermione is the brains
Harry is the heart/soul
Ron's the wildcard

Fuck, you're right. It would have been a good theme to learn since the first 2 movies were aimed at children.

it's about willpower you dumbs

Sounds like the sort of cop-out you'd expect from a woman author..

Dumbledore was based. Fuck Slytherin, no one likes those fags.

HARRY
POTTER
IS FOR FUCKING HOMOS
AND POOFTERS

It wouldn't be too bad if she hadn't shown losers like Wormtail and Crabbe casting powerful spells putting the willpower bar low enough for the average wizard to trip over.

this

filthy mudblood detected

I think that the true arrangement is:

>Brains: Hermione
>Muscle: Ron
>Wild card: Harry

Ron usually is just the beater who'll go in there and fire spells around or be fodder for whatever hairbrained scheme or plan they're pulling. He's reluctantly up for anything.

Harry in the entire series is literally the wildcard element to the whole wizarding world. There's always some ridiculous magic bullshit reason why he's saving the day, from "love" to his connection with Voldemort to deus ex machina asspulls and etc. Even in Quidditch the Seeker role is the wildcard role.

>stop a criminal from getting a stone of immortality and infinite gold when the school staff failed
>this deserves no reward
Fuck you, Gryffindor earned that victory.

but those spells were literally dark magic and they were naturally more towards the evil scale of wanting to cause hurt

like someone else said above Harry sucked at the crucio spell but crabbe and goyle were good at it naturally

they just didnt care enough to learn how to turn snails into tables or whatever

Neville was terrible at magic until Bellatrix escaped and he devoted himself to everything in the DA

>Goblin Slayer became Minister of Magic
That explains why Fudge was so autistic.

That's different from willpower or ability though. Wanting to do evil as a secondary condition for "dark magic" doesn't change the fact that those spell should have been difficult to cast.
Once the bar for being able to cast avada kedavra is set at Pettigrew's level there is no reason to have any actual death eaters use anything but that spell.

That is pretty much all death eaters used, but they aim like stormtroopers.

There are plenty of examples of DE spells being blocked or people being hit with spells but not dying. It was hardly their only spell.

>clear cut good and evil

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Johnny Depp is the best Potter universe villain

Prove me wrong.

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thats why i used Neville as an example too.
he was trash at magic until the Azkaban breakout and then he was completely focused on learning.

crabbe and goyle didnt care about school or learning at all till their was a subject they were interested in (dark arts)

even Harry was complete trash at things like non verbal magic and others.
but he excelled at things like defense against the dark arts, charms, transfiguration (to a point) cause thats what he was interested in.

but ollivander even says that if you have even the tiniest bit magical ability you can force your will into the flimsiest of sticks but wands cater to what connects in you. but wand lore is its own "branch" of magic.

picture two people learning guitar. one has natural talent but doesnt really care vs one who doesnt have the talent and wants to practice and learn.

Dumbledore himself says that its the choices they make and not the abilities they're born with that decide who they are and what theyre good at.

>eh hem...

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as far as the killing curse goes
these are both right

the death eaters used it plenty of times
Madame Bones got it inbetween 5/6.
Rowe (the big dumb blonde death eater took himself out with it)

fake moody tells the class they can point at him and say and it wont do any good

death eaters didnt use it at Harry cause Voldy straight up told them not to.

Dumbledore goes on about how most of the death eaters are sadistic in their own ways and rarely just kill when he's talking to them in the lightning struck tower bit. they'd rather play with and torture their victims.

AND it's never said straight out but im guessing using the spell will take a bit out of you. like going for the all out knockout punch leaves you open. its rarely used as an opener move unless you got the element of surprise.

when Bellatrix uses it on the fox she thought was an auror its said that she's breathing heavy but that might be because she was running after Narcissa.

It's said killing takes a part of you but Molly uses it on Bella and i doubt she's on the way to becoming the next Dark Lord. Certainly left her shaken up though.

Again im good if all that is head cannon nonsense and you want to ignore it but it's clearly implied that using the spell even you want the person dead isn't that easy. Unless youre really bad inside but thats just life.

>muh soul
What's it like to have a pea-sized brain?

what's it like being an npc?

Why've would wizards ever fight in conventional warfare? Wizards that don't need a wand can do perfect guerilla warfare. Take some mentally deranged wizards and use them as suicide bombs.
You lack imagination.

Actually I much rather hire someone from Hufflepuff than anyone else.
Slytherins got ambition and probably plans to usurp the company.
Gryffindors are risk takers and while that might be good, it could mean disaster.
Ravenclaws are smart, but many of them are also weird as fuck
Hufflepuffs are loyal and hard working, you basically get a hard working employee that will probably stay loyal to the company.

Christ I forgot about all this shit, thanks user for making Ron a real bro.

t. myself ;)

Slytherins are chads you moron. People defend them because when you grow up you realize how fucking bullshit it was how they were treated.

none of the students care about the gay wizard cup bullshit. they just want to get the fuck out of there

I think it's a nice thing in the earlier years but the novelty of it wears off after the third year. I doubt many students would care once they get abit older and it becomes abit of a joke.

>his hope, optimism, and scholarship: gone
That's why I hate most western stuff. The protagonist always wins and never loses anything.
>muh serious Black

How did gryffindor earn that victory? It was literally just ron, harry and hermoine who did that. Those are the 3 that should be rewarded not all the other fuckwits in gryffindor who did jack shit that year

Slytherin gang here to flex on the mudbloods and their traitorous sympathizers

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Based and /comfy/pilled

>constantly piss on slytherin
>be surprised they don't wanna help defend the school

Prisoner of Azkaban is my go to /comfykino/

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i honestly can't believe it's been 3 years

you forgot neville

>gf is from the UK
>she looks just like Luna
>"holy mother of boners, she's a keeper"
>remember that UK women hitthe wall even harder than others because of the anglo gene
>decide to see what the Luna actress looks like now
>mfw

Am unironically debating breaking up with her. I dont want to end up with la goblina...

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Enjoy the qt while it last
And who knows, l'aube you'll get more infatuated with her and will want to stay with her

Imagine if instead ron was in hufflepuff, hermione was in ravenclaw, and malfoy was a protagonist too, then you couldve had each of the houses represented but apparently thats too complicated instead of gryffindor good slytherin bad and everyone else is irrelevant

but that's basically what Draco did in 6th year

I'm still fucking mad how badly they assassinated Ron in the movies

Guess they realized they couldn't get away with the usual Redhead Replacement™ so they just made him a useless cunt instead

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yeah. i've played that game too. I don't remember genie in the movies though.

Duels are fast paced as fuck and it's generally harder to muster up the willpower/malice/whatever to use the killing curse while under that much pressure

Not to mention you can't use it non-verbally meaning you HAVE to say the words out loud which takes time, leaves you open to counter-attack, and lets everyone know what you're doing

Part of the reason Voldemort is so feared is that he's one of the few who can use it effectively in combat

Because that's how it works, dumbass. Do you think every single student in a house earns points? Houses are carried by the remarkable few.

I bet you are a Slytherin Fag.

Yes, because he gives good, justifiable reasons for giving Gryffindor the points they get. Also, throughout the movie, Snape routinely unfairly demerits Gryffindor. If it's not fair for Dumbledore to give them points (even though he's allowed to and, again, has good reason to given they literally saved the fucking world), then it's not fair that Snape constantly took away points just because he felt like being a dick. In fact, Snape probably took away more points unfairly and unjustly than Dumbledore justly gave to Gryffindor. You'll also notice that everyone in the other two houses recognize that Gryffindor was getting robbed and cheered when Dumbledore made things right.

>be student
>sorting hat puts you in slytherin
>uh okay whatever
>make good friends around school
>work diligently to get good grades
>Hogwarts becomes like a home away from home
>get recognized for good deeds and work with a few house points
>feel beaming with pride
>Dumbledore gets up
>"Umm...no sweetie"
>apparently the house I didn't even choose to be put in is evil because 1 of the teachers is evil and one of the students is a bully
>Dumbledoor gives Griffindoor all the points for being good guys
>all my friends and fellow Slytherin members feel the eyes of the hundreds of Griffindoor, Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw glaring at us smugly
>feel tears welling up in my eyes, I worked so hard and I never did anything bad
>"n-not all Slytherins!"
>our table begins to chant
>"NOT ALL SLYTHERINS!"
>"NOT ALL SLYTHERINS!"
>the other houses are gobsmacked
>Dumbledoor practically shaking with rage
>casts a spell that bind our entire table in chains and gags
>"HOWEVER...In light of recent events I feel it is necesary to give Grifindoor another 100 points!"
>Grifindoor's table errupts in celebration again even though they alread won
>go home to see my parents
>Dad can't even look me in the eye, he read in the papers how evil Slytherins are
>cry myself to sleep

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DESU Harry, Hermione and Neville pissed away 150 points earlier in the story. They would've tied with Slytherin.

That's dead accurate.

Harry, did I ever tell you about my secret brother Aurelius? He was traveling across the Atlantic Ocean as a baby when he was accidentally kidnapped by the unloved daughter of a French rapist wizard, who switched him with her father's real son, gave him to a French half-elf, and let her real brother die in the shipwreck. Speaking of which, the mother of the accidentally kidnapped son dove into the water to rescue her (supposed) son and drowned, so I guess that would mean she was also my mother, but for some reason I never mentioned this either. Also I don't know why the wizards didn't just apparate off of the sinking ship. Anyway, the aforementioned French half-elf gave my brother (thinking it was the rapist's son--she was the servant of the raped woman, which meant she also had to serve the rapist after the woman died in childbirth) to an orphanage that hates wizards, then both she and the daughter went back to Paris. She did this on orders from the father, who wanted to protect his (supposed) son from the older, adult non-rape son of the raped woman who gave birth to the real son's half-sister, who incidentally I trained in wizardry in the 1910s with the help Professor McGonagell, twenty years before Professor McGonagell was even born. The non-rape son wanted revenge for his mother being raped, so completely logically, he tried to kill the baby instead of the father, and even though the rapist father was a powerful wizard nobleman, he thought the best thing for his beloved son was to be sent to America and protected in absolutely no way whatsoever or even informed that he was a wizard, leading half of New York to be blown up right in front of all the muggles (called "nomajs" in America). Eventually the non-rapist son tracked down Aurelius (thinking it was the rape son) in Paris, where we all learned that he (that meaning Aurelius) had started a relationship with an Vietnamese woman who would later turn into Voldemort's pet snake.

He was a good friend.

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That was my favorite thing about the character was his blatant autism. I also love hoe Dumbledore clearly takes advantage of him to get what he wants.

To be fair, the Slytherins had a history of supporting the "wrong" side even before Voldemort, namely Grindlewald

Snape would have just taken away points if they were ever in the lead. It's been ages, but I'm pretty sure the first book flat out says as much.

>Molly uses it on Bella
She used a powerful Stunner that stopped Bella's heart. That almost happened to McGonagall in 5.

You could write any character doing anything you dumb fuck. THAT'S HOW BOOKS WORK.

god rowling is a fuckin retard

Nobody:

Literally Nobody:

Not even a single muggle:

Dumbledore: "10000 POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR!!"

Upvoted

THEY. FUCKING. WON.

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As far as numbers and tech are concerned sure, but wizards could easily infiltrate key positions, or take out key figures on the side of the muggles. No point having a big army when there's no one to lead it.

is Dumbledoor the Exodia of Hogwarts?

COPE

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glad this is still a meme

some things never change

>Sucklenutts
>Gayfagdork
>Rapethemcucks
And then Slytherin into your mom’s bed
We win the house cup every other year gayfagdorks, fuck you, you can have it this year.

Absolute kino.

Despite making up 25% of the wizarding population, Slytherins account for 100% of all Death Eaters

I laughed way to hard at this

>fake moody tells the class they can point at him and say and it wont do any good
Considering the Jr. Death Eaters in that class and the current state of a post-war society I'm surprised there wasn't even a single student who could potentially kill someone in that class, at that time.
Imagine how it would have ended if some Slyth came up to him to try it out and just fucking killed him

That last quote by Ron is NOT in the first book