Times you acted like the driver

Times you acted like the driver
>at mall shop
>qt girl giving honey free samples offers me a free sample
>stop walking
>stare at her for 45 seconds
>walk away
I'm not cool thought i was just day dreaming about our life together

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Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=ZOYTfpHl0JA&t=718s
youtube.com/watch?v=-DSVDcw6iW8
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

>at house
>see brother crying
>he tells me that a kid across the street slapped him and tell him to shove a stick up his ass and handed him one
>walk across the street and pushed him to the ground
>held the stick to his face while he was crying
>I say “remember this” and shove it down his throat

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Why would you ever do that? Did porn muddle your brain or something

>get in car
>put on driving gloves
>drive through the night
>go to put some music on
>ipod screen won't work with gloves on
>pull one of with my teeth and fling it with my mouth like a dog playing with a chew toy
>play drive soundtrack
>can't find other glove
>drive home with one glove

>at house
>working on assembling car part
>neighbor is a cute girl that I talk to
>I can hear that she’s throwing a party
>walk outside to the hallway to talk to her
>See she’s making out with a spic
>I stare at them until the guy tells me to fuck off
>I walk back inside of my apartment and blast drive soundtrack

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>sit in a bus
>qt 10/10 sits next to me
>pretend she’s my girlfriend in my head
>i imagine I’m driving the car and “real human being” playing in my head
>even do hand motions while bus turns corners
>get to my station
>go home and fap to the fantasy

how come through the movie noone ever tell this guy his jacket is fuckin inside out?

Shut your mouth, before i kick your teeth down your throat and shut it for you.

>I’m a Uber driver
>pick up client
>tell him I don’t carry a gun I only drive
>make unnecessary turns
>when he ask why I say nothing
>stop in a crowded area
>get out
>put on hat and disappear in crowd

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>drive home with one glove
Pottery.

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Isnt it weird to carry a jacket while wearing a jacket thats very weird why didnt the police notice it

It was very cold.

>be me
>attractive, fit, handsome, fast, strong, cool as ice
>mother sends me to the store
>i tell her, i have to take care of business
>she tells me she need some ingredient to dinner
>i glare at her for two minutes straight
>"I don't need to know the details, i just drive"
>grab my designer leather jacket, drive to the store in my mom's volvo
>get the stuff, stand in line for the cashier
>she is a cute girl
>the customer, a real douche-looking guy, yells at her for some mistake
>"why don't you go fuck yourself" i mumble to myself
>he comes over to me, takes up some groceries and dumps it on me and then runs away
>i stand without saying anything staring after him,
>cashier girls thanks me, says i am a real hero
>i say
>"no i am a real human bean"
>walked out, never went back
>that's what real beans do

Those are always gold

>watch Drive for the 5th time
>finally convinced to take my driving exam
>fail

REAL HUMAN BEEEEAAAAN

gay story desu

>fail driving exam???

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>outside a bar smoking a cigarette
>qt walks up to me and asks for me to take a picture of her and her friend
>take picture, tell them they look great
>stare at her
>walk away when she starts a conversation with me

based

>at a wedding
>sitting alone at a table
>everyone's dancing and whatnot
>i'm just watching and drinking
>woman comes up to me
>obviously wants to dance with me
>asks me if i knew this song
>i pause and stare at her for a few seconds
>i say no and leave the room to get another beer

>working part time for ubereats/doordash just to put off dealing with crippling insomnia
>someone orders a shitton of takeout
>regular customer, they tip really well if you get it to them quick
>delivery is in a rural area, police presence is low
>tear ass into the city and back
Times you acted like a nocturnal tofu delivery driver. youtube.com/watch?v=ZOYTfpHl0JA&t=718s

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4 u

You should have stamped on his head.

Sublime.

>be me
>watch drive for the first time
>think the driver is cool as fuck and want to be like him
>always had trouble making eye contact with people
>start training myself to keep better eye contact so i can stare at people like him
>stare at people as they walk past me
>stare at people whenever i'm sitting in class
>stare at whoever i get the chance to stare at
>become pretty good at keeping eye contact
>i now can stare at pretty girls without thinking about it, or even notice i'm doing it
>become the creepy dude that can't stop staring at people, instead of the weird loner that never makes eye contact
>can't decide which one is better

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I miss these threads

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Kek

I failed it 4 times man, and I drive pretty decently. Shit happens. It's just luck sometimes
Keep going, you'll get it eventually. Even the most retarded get the driver's licence eventually

holy kek

Based

>Sitting in my 1997 Honda Civic
>Hand on steering wheel
>Nightcall playing in background
>Just staring into the sunset for 10 mins straight
>Barely blink
>Looking cool
>Lady at drive thru window asks "are you okay?"
>Say "I drive"

>wake up
>my mother calls
>says she has to go to the airport but doesn't want to pay for long term parking.
>asks if i can drive her
>wait 10 seconds and then reply "......Yeah sure"
>I drive to her house and pick her up
>she gets in, i start driving
>stay completely silent even as she tells me about her trip
>whatever, i'm too cool to care about her trip to Denmark or whatever
>we're about half the way to the airport
>i finally break my silence
>ask my mother "Hey do you wanna see something?"
>my mom replies "uhh.. sure"
>turn on the car radio
>"Real Human Being" starts playing
>i drive off the halfway and drive to some river
>stop the car
>stupid mother starts complaining we don't have time for this, she needs to get to the airport
>goes on a rant about how this shit is why i can't get a job and why i'm a failure at life
>tells me this is why my father left us
>i finally snap
>bitch slap my mother
>she falls on the ground
>"you're lying to me. how about this? from now on, every word out of your mouth is the truth. or i'm gonna hurt you. do you understand?"

Part 2 please

thanks senpai i hope so

anxiety got to me and they said i dont seem secure enough

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I failed in the first time too my dude, it's normal

I grew up in a rural area. My driving exam was at like 10am when all the wagies in my rural town were at work.
So my driving exam consisted of driving through an empty town. I passed effortlessly.

My sides.

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>no master and commander poster
Nah

>tfw going to wedding soon
God I wish I didn't have to go

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Lel

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Bumping with a repost:
>meet Chinese grill on /soc/
>fall in live after 3 months talking everyday
>never do webcam
>share dozens of pics
>after 2 years I am fully prepared to visit her
>learnt Chinese
>blew off 5 local girls
>learn their culture
>got vaccinated
>spend close to 5 grand tickets
>left my job
>she told me she will be wearing a red dress at the airport
>plane lands
>sweating like a jew at the bank
>look everywhere for her at the airport
>only a short gay long haired manlet is wearing red
>h-hi
>hi, I am the girl. I can explain
?????
youtube.com/watch?v=-DSVDcw6iW8

what happened next

>things that totally happened

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Wholesome.

There's no other part but I can safely assume he beat him to a pulp.

kek.

Was she a qt trap with a feminine penis?

Happened just now actually.
>raining as piss outside
>notice qt without umbrella hiding under the roof of a store
>go up to her, walk past her and go into the store
>buy umbrella
>go outside
>it isn't raining anymore
>qt is nowhere to be seen
>I'm stuck with an extra umbrella that I don't need
>stare at it for a minute
>throw it in the trash
>real human bean starts playing as I make my way to work

LMAO

>throw it in the trash
This is literally something I would do desu

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Why are people afraid to get wet anyway

This movie has ruined me. Every fucking time I meet a new person and they ask what I do for work THE FIRST THOUGHT is always "I drive."

GOD DAMN IT

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Is that what you actually do? Are you a taxi driver or something?

The line "I drive... for the movies" always confused me, because as the audience we know what it means. He is a stunt driver for Hollywood films.
But if I walk up to someone and ask them what they do, and they reply "I drive for the movies", I'd be confused as fuck and ask "huh? what do you mean?", yet the girl in the movie knew exactly what he meant.

underrated

Dude I dont even own a fucking car

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Based

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>back in the university days
>pickup my gf from her studies
>see her running towards car
>"hey user, can we wait for my classmates and give them a lift?"
>I'm in the mood for some irl shitposting
>point at the clock "see this? They have 5 minues. No more, no less. For those 5 minutes I'm here. A second too much and I'm gone"
>gf:"....... Okaaaay"
>for 5 minutes I sit in silence and stare at the clock
>I see anons running towards my car
>5 minutes are up
>I floor it and storm away right in front of them
>gf: "holly fuck user, why did you do that?!You are some kind of special jerk bla bla bla bla..."
>I smile, not saying a Word, put the volume up so that her complaining Is drown by "real human bean" blasting through speakers
>ride into the evening sunset