What's it like watching movies with women?
murderous rage
>who's that guy?
>what's happening?
>why are they fighting?
every fucking time
You nervously pick her up, she sits in your car, you drive to the theatre in silence. The sweat trickles down your temples as you think of what to say, but you can't get a word out. She looks at you then looks away, then gets her phone out and taps.
You arrive at the theatre, you offer your hand, she grudgingly accepts. Wow...her hand is warm and soft! Should you grip it or just touch fingers??? You get tickets, stammering out the name to the ticket agent. He looks disgustingly at you while handing you the stubs. You go to the dark theatre and get your seats. You sit next to her, more silence....shit.
She breathes loudly as if disappointed you aren't talking to her. She continues to tap on her phone.
Should I put my arm around her? What then? Fuck, why didn't I think of this beforehand???
You sit in silence through the movie, not remembering a thing, your neck is hot. The lights go up, she walks out and you follow, your drive her home, she gestures "bye" and you drive home without saying a word.
You will never ever do this again...
She tells you she fucked the black guy at work you hate and breaks up with you in the middle of the film but your phone is dead and she's your ride back home.
>I don't get it
>why
>lol that's so dumb
>Who dat
>pixar movie: GOOD
you have to make sure not to get a boner during the sex scenes.
Kek couldn’t stop laughing so true so true
>that pleasant surprise they always have when they touch my dick that's been forced through a hole in the bottom of the popcorn bucket
You pick her up, she sits in your car, you drive to a remote field in silence.
She's quiet a while, then: "I thought we were going to a movie."
You pause a while before answering. "You thought wrong...
"Whore."
>laughs during emotional scene only men will understand
>makes me wanna raise my pimp hand to her
Fuck taking bitches to the movies
Not too bad in a theater. Horrible any other time. They wait till important dialog to talk over it at you and sit in bored silence during action sequences, unless they are squeamish, at which point they either leave or turn into judgmental bitches.
It's fine, providing you're watching one they actually want to watch. The meme version of what they're like stems from guys expecting women to just sit next to them while they watch shit they'd be watching anyway, or if they were with "the guys".
>when does this end?
>wait why did [hero character] do [honorable thing]?
the last time i took a girl out she told me she was bored because it was an old people movie
It was Bad Time at El Camino Royale
>GF: OMG it's "Taken on a Plane"!!!!
>Me: wut?
>GF: Commuter, let's watch Commuter.
>Me: Cool. *click*
>GF: *whips out phone and starts facebook*
>GF: BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
>GF: What's going on? Why is there money in the restroom? Why is he looking for someone?
>Me: *I explain tersely.*
>GF: BLAH BLAH BLAH FACEBOOK SHIT BLAH BLAH.
Repeat for nearly every movie. It's to the point I leave the room if I see her on her phone while the TV is on.
Asking questions about the plot a millisecond before the movie explains it.
a classic
or worse... Asking questions about the plot before the movie starts
or worse, not sucking my dick before the mc shows up
They just don't pay attention, one of my friends is cool tho, but she's the only one I know.
I wish I reached adulthood before smart phones became a thing.
I can’t imagine women just sitting there and watching a film without poking through Facebook or Instagram or whatever.
She’ll wait for you to get involved with the story then go “hang out” with her “friend” that just had a rough break up
Depends. If the movie is really good, they'll get jealous of it and try to distract you from it. They'll suck you dick, start ovulating, spit on their pussies and all sorts of other shit because the fact something has your attention besides them is literally incomprehensible to them. If the movie is bad they'll blame it on you like you wrote, directed, and starred in it.
Real talk I don't know how you are meant to put your arm around her when she's just sitting back normally, it seems like such an awkward motion and would involve you basically hitting her in the back of the head with your arm to get her to pick up on what you're doing, how the fuck do movies make it look so effortless
Actually pretty cozy. Only done it once though.
>waht did he say?
>wait so why did they do that?
>Oh I think I get it
>can you pause it real fast
They fart a lot
in your face i hope
If by face, you mean mouth, then of course
I've never met people so picky about movies
>put on a relatively good movie
>"uhh nothing happens! This is so boring"
>put on retard capeshit
>"this is stupid and it doesn't even make sense"
>put on any other movie
>"I don't like horror movies its too scary"
>"I don't like romantic movies its too dumb"
>"I don't like really long movie or really short movies"
>texts or does something else during most movies
>asks any questions about basic plot or character motivations
>will randomly really like some random movie for no rhyme or reason
These days it's more
>Plays on their phone the whole time
>If Marvel/Disney: I really liked it
>If not Marvel-Disney: I didn't like it
by face i mean ass, ass to ass fart transplant
When I'm at the theater I sometimes fantasize about watching the movie with a cute girl and then talking and joking about it with her on my way home.
Have you ever asked yourselves why only retarded women want to watch movies with you?
>retarded women
That's redundant.
Yes, there are more retarded women than not.
>When I'm at the theater I sometimes fantasize about watching the movie with a cute girl and then talking and joking about it with her on my way home.
DON'T GET A GF. Mine has made me see all THREE Fifty-Shades of Grey movies in the theatre. Its a living hell I tell ya.
ANNOYING
LIKE DOING ANYTHING WITH WOMEN OTHER THAN P IN V
You could just tell her you don't want to see that gay shit, what's she going to do if you say that? Not suck your dick?
my mom yelps a lot cuz she startles easily so i havevto tell her screaming is okay but words are not
thats ussually my father
on another note ive seen two weiedo brings blankets to the theater both talked. i would tell a story but no one will believe it cuz Yea Forums
why has no one noticed that the same man is sitting both in front of and behind himself in op's pic?
>be woman
>dumped man for wandering off without pausing a movie, loading a bowl of weed, smoking it, coming back, and then shouting plot predictions at the screen
>it took two more years until I lost my virginity but it was the right choice