Is there anything more retarded than going to the beach?

Is there anything more retarded than going to the beach?

If you don't have a good body, you're just humiliating yourself, sitting right there doing nothing is just boring, the water is too cold
t. countrysider visiting it

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Can confirm the beach is shit. Sand gets everywhere and you can't read the book you took with you because there's wind, sand and the white pages reflect so hard it hurts your eyes. Little kids being loud runnin' amok. Fat fucking parents working on their tan. The beach is a place of fucking bullshit for the riff raff. Commoners. The only way you can enjoy such a hellhole is getting hammered as fast as you can. And even then.

>tfw you think you’ve gotten away with double homicide but a few hundred feet away they’re lifting a boat out of the water and will find the corpse of your first victim, the very man you framed for your second murder, because the fucking anchor you cut from the boat got caught up in the hull

Kill me now.

Floridian here, I enjoy the beach about once every 5 years for an hour since as a kid we went so much that I learned to hate it.
>sand is a pain in the ass
>it's already hot as fuck so sitting on a sandy shore just makes it twice as hot
>Gulf breeze is only slight and not enough to counteract the humidity
>Gulf water is actually based since it isn't ice cold and it's clear
>but it sucks to swim in because it's so placid that the average water temperature is like 75 degrees so it doesn't cool you off
>saltwater feels like shit when it dries on you
>can't do anything cool on shore besides build a sandcastle or go shelling because it's windy enough to kick up sand and you can't see for shit even with shades
>guaranteed to get a sunburn no matter how much SPF 150 you use
>a good amount of hot babes tan with their bikini bottoms stuffed into their ass crack so at least there's that
>you could have just skipped the entire mess and gone to the pool that's actually cold and still has hot babes

>everybody wants to just sit around and do nothing together
The beach is like the worst place I could think of to meditate, there's always kids yelling everywhere

>t. limpwristed sub 100 ng/ ml test

The only purpose served by the beach is surfing.
Sunbathing, swimming, and relaxing are all done better poolside and you have to be some kind of roastie or beta to disagree.

Been sat on a beach on a Thai island today.
>The sand is perfect white powder, not coarse in the slightest, actually very comfy to walk on
>Good weather, soaked up the sun's glorious radiation as I admired the lush mountainous jungle landscape and turquoise bay, listening to the calming sound of waves and watching the occasional boat go by
>Went for a swim, the water was warm but not too hot, and crystal clear, floated in the water for a while looking at the sky to cool down
>Got some fresh sea food from a little bar a short walk down the beach where I watched the sunset behind the mountains
I'd post a picture but apparently Yea Forums has banned the entire country from posting files which I can't believe is allowed but oh well. Basically I guess it depends on the beach, OP.

>the beach.
yikes

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This, it's coarse and rough and gets everywhere

You just make yourself older by exposing your skin to the sun. Its why THOTs look so old by the time they're 30.

Learn the lesson of Elizabeth Debicki, stay pale.

The beach is comfy when everyone isn't fat or obnoxious/non-white.

That's like saying there's no point to hiking outside because walking is done better on a treadmill. ITT: autists can't into the beauty of nature.

I fucking HATE nature, it's hot and there is bugs everywhere.

>Makes thread on /fit/
>Gets 3 replies
Continues here lmao

I go to the beach to fish.

imagine being this much of a pussy

>go to beach
>constant waves of immigrants washing up on shore
>get fined by local authorities if i don't offer them food, money, my daughter and my wife so they feel welcome in their new country

Have you taken the remote beach pill?
Regular beach:
>garbage in the water
>Mexicans wearing jeans in the water and smoking cigarettes on the sand
>harassed by lifeguards and cops if you have a beer
>poor people playing loud and terrible music
Meanwhile, at my friend’s beachside ranch:
>only a few people who all know each other
>everyone is rich and attractive
>can drink whatever you want, however much you want
>good music only
>clean beach, you can watch the dolphins go by

t.pastybongpussy

I swam in the Mediterranean a few and the salt water felt super curative to my skin and bones. It was incredible. Other than that going out in direct sunshine for more than 40 seconds makes me physically ill.

for the ladies amirite? youz a playah. a playah at the playa, how 'bout that. That's cool.

The beach is a social hobby. You go there to stare at girls/fuck your gf get drunk with friends and/or have a bonfire or bbq. Obviously if you're a lonely autists you're going to have a bad time.

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The only time I ever had fun on the beach was when I was in college and made better-than-acquaintances-but-not-really-super-friends with some Bohemian Grove-tier rich kid and I got invited to his family's literal private beach with some boating in the late afternoon. Ruined everything after because being on the beach with the average poor trash ruins the experience.

t. Anakin

>he lives in a country where all the good beaches are crowded in summer
fucking yuropoors lmao

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Good mobie

Showing off your body to scantily clad women is definitely a plus. If you are too insecure to go to the beach and enjoy soaking up some rays, eating some snacks, and playing in the ocean, your loss

>tfw own a beach house and the beach is private so I don't have to deal with any of your poorfag issues and can walk the beach at night with my gf and not worry about shit

Fuck hurricanes though. Any time I see one coming near the gulf my ass is on a plane north, but I have God tier insurance and all my important stuff is in my house in Jew York so fuck it, crush it and I'll rebuild better.

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>in Jew York

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This is what you go to the beach for

>soaking up some rays
You're growing cancer dude! How much in denial can you be.

>the water is too cold
pussy

I own three houses, the beach house on the Gulf, the lake house in Upstate Jew York, and a cabin in Montana. I am a trust fund babby and also the only grandchild so half of my grandparents properties went to me after they died. The other half to my parents. Don't get mad at me because I won life BINGO before I was even born.

why yes, i love pussy

Doubtful.

I live in my car and use McDonald's wifi to shitpost and eat out of their dumpster. You got everything handed to you and I worked my ass off, even doing four years of African-American studies in college and getting my degree and I am pretty much homeless and you have more homes than you can even use. Now tell me there is any justice in this world.

Sunscreen idiot

there's just two hiccups, getting in past your dick and getting in past your nipples
once you've taken both plunges and stayed in for a few mins you're golden

>African-American studies

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Errrr....no, for actual fish.

FUCKING /pol/ TOLD ME TO PICK THAT AS MY MAJOR AS IT WOULD BE WHERE THE MONEY WAS WHEN I GRADUATED AND THE CLASSES WERE EASY AND MADE SO PEOPLE ON SPORTS SCHOLARSHIPS WHO WERE DUMB COULD GET PASSING GRADES FUCK YOU I EAT OUT OF THE FUCKING TRASH BECAUSE THEY LIED LIKE DEVIL CRACKERS ALWAYS DO GIVE ME A HOUSE I WANT MY 40 ACRES AND A MULE NO JUSTICE NO PEACE

Sandcastles, swimming, mud-fights, dinghy rides, inflatables

Are you allergic to fun nigger?

Nice

LITERALLY THIS

B O A T S

BUT SOME BEACH IS OK

ALSO HAVING A SHIT BODY IS YOUR FAULT, ITS NOT HARD DYEL FAGGOT

Based Delon poster