Are you a Tommy Texter?

Sheldon Shitter

I'm a Kevin Ketamine snorter

I'm a Chucky Fucker.

I rarely even look at my phone. I miss calls and texts all the time because it's permanently on silent.

Why do British people come up with these retarded nicknames with alliterations and actions

I'm a Lenny Lyncher

I'm more of an Alabama Nigger myself.

I'm somewhat of a Serial Sodomizer

UK media has a penchant for infantilism.

I go to the movies about once every year, fuck you

It's actually from a Canadian movie theatre preview.

british enuf m80

Canadians are wannabe Brits. Fags never even revolted.

Trying to argue with you but I really can't.

nice digits kevin snort snort

I would say it's better than being an amerimutt but it's really not. Except we don't have as much race mixing, mainly just lots of immigrants.

USA equivalent is Sam Shooter

>tfw name is sam

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>Go the the kinoplex
>The previews start in a dark, drab, unwelcome room full of people.
>I take my top of the line phone and I magically provide those around me with comforting illumination.
>I text non stop. Women around me are impressed and consider I must be quite popular to have so many people to text, and an interesting fellow with a lot to say. Seats get wet.
>Men see me flaunting social norms like a champ, acting like a rebel, and are impressed by my confidence. They know that if something goes down, I'd be the one to follow.
>Soon I start controlling the rhythm of the movie viewing experience with my text. I text furiously when something interesting happens in the movie, I slow down during the quiet parts... everybody's experience is increased tenfold.
>When the movie is over sometimes people wants to thank me and shake my hand. Often kids approach me and ask me for my autograph.
>It's a hard job, but I don't mind.

Dont worry user, al Americans have compulsion to commit mass homicidal atrocities with guns, doesnt matter what your name is. What is important is you resist the urges. Go to psychiatrists and take unnecessary medications if it helps you.

>that time I was the designated phone user
Holy shit it was so good. If you guys can I would TOTALLY recommend

brits are fags they call TVs "telly"

No

t. pays $300 for a steak